Francesca was still weak. He helped her into her apartment. She looked around the quiet space. “I miss him already. I didn’t know how much until I walked in here,” she said to Tim. “My baby probably thinks I ran off and left him. I want him to be curling around my legs like he always did whenever I came in the house,” she said of her cat.
Tim gathered her in his arms. “I know you do, baby. But Jabez is in a good home. A real good home. You know the Wilkins family has always adored Jabez. I’ve been going by their house and checking on him. He’s the boss, the top cat around that place.” Tim chuckled.
Francesca managed to smile. “That’s good. It’s just that I wanted him home when I got here.”
“You need to get settled in yourself first. I promise that I’ll go pick up Jabez in a day or two. You need some time to adjust to being at home again. Okay?”
“Okay,” Francesca said and touched her face like she had a nervous twitch.
“Let me go outside and bring your things in. Why don’t you have a seat in your favorite old raggedy recliner?” Tim said.
Francesca laughed out loud. “Oh, no, you didn’t just call my beautiful, soft recliner raggedy.” She managed to pick up the fluffy pillow from the chair and used it to hit Tim on his chest.
He grabbed hold of her and kissed her. Francesca pulled her head back. She didn’t know what to say or do. She’d never been kissed by a man—never desired to be kissed by one until Tim. The butterflies in her stomach fluttered.
“I’m sorry about that,” he said. “I couldn’t help myself. You’re so beautiful, Francesca.”
Francesca leaned her head against his chest in silence. When she spoke, she said, “Maybe you should get the things out of the car. I’m going to take your advice and sit down in my raggedy chair.” The two of them looked at each other and smiles cascaded across both their faces.
Tim made two trips to get all of Francesca’s gifts and clothes from the car. He came back inside her apartment and placed the last of the items around the apartment.
“Will you sit down, please?” Francesca asked him.
Tim obeyed and plopped down on the bright tangerine-orange sofa nearby. “Since you’ve admitted your unfailing love for me, tell me something.”
“Don’t start nothing, Tim. I said I love you. I did not say that I was in love with you.”
“Well, let’s clarify that right now. Francesca Graham, are you in love with me?” Tim got down on the floor, onto his knees, and crawled over to where Francesca sat.
She laughed and petted him on the head like she would Jabez. “You are so crazy,” she told him. She replaced a look of amusement with one of seriousness. Her tone of voice matched her expression. Francesca caressed the side of Tim’s bearded face with the back of her hand. His face felt rough yet tender at the same time. She felt that funny feeling inside her tummy again. Her words came out slowly and with executed caution. “I am in love with you, Tim. I don’t want anyone else in my life but you,” she told him.
Tim rested his head on her legs. His hands moved along the contours of her body. He glanced back up at her. “I want you to be my wife. I want to spend the rest of my life on earth with you, Francesca. Will you marry me?”
Francesca took his head in her hands and tilted his face upward. She looked at the obvious love that seemed to glow in Tim’s eyes. At that moment, she felt a sense of peace and total acceptance. Marriage had never entered her mind—not ever. Her life had been spent living on the streets, doing drugs, and hanging out with her lesbian lovers and get-high friends. Now here she was, a woman living with a death sentence over her life, but who was still lovable and loved.
“Yes. Sounds like a pretty good idea,” Francesca told him.
He kissed Francesca all over her face. He didn’t stop until his mouth covered hers.
Chapter 23
One reason God created time was so that there would
be a place to bury the failures of the past.
— Unknown
Pastor and Stiles watched the movers unload the last piece of Pastor’s furniture into his new home. Kirby Pines Life Care Community was where Pastor decided to move after he was released from Health South Rehab.
Like Francesca, he stayed in the rehab hospital far longer than any of them expected. But the improvement Pastor experienced after working with the therapists proved to be more than worth a one-month stay.
Pastor looked forward to being on his own again. He had prayed and thought about it while he was at Health South. There was no way he could go back to living with Stiles and Detria. He couldn’t put the weight of his health problems on his son and daughter-in-law. He didn’t want a repeat of what had already happened.
The road had been long and definitely tough at times for him, and he prayed every day for God to not allow him to be bitter toward his daughter-in-law. God answered his prayer, because Pastor felt nothing but pure compassion for Detria. He welcomed the change he was about to embark upon.
Pastor had made the final decision to move on his own while he was in rehab, and there was no turning back. He asked some of the nurses to research various assisted-living homes, and Kirby Pines impressed him the most. One of the patients at Health South lived at Kirby Pines, too. It took some convincing and standing up for himself before Stiles gave in to Pastor’s decision.
“Pastor, I really do like this place. I believe you’re going to have a good time living here,” Stiles said when they walked inside the one-bedroom apartment unit. “I tell you, at first I was dead set against you living on your own again, but I know you’re not really alone. God is with you. And the staff here has been outstanding. Who knows, maybe you’ll regain the use of your legs enough to drive your car again. Or we could see about getting you one of those hand controls to drive with once you’re fully recuperated.”
“I like the thought of driving again,” Pastor said. At Kirby Pines, he would receive comprehensive health care. He could continue his occupational therapy, which had given Pastor a new lease on life. Maybe he could prepare to move forward in life without Audrey by his side.
The six-hundred-plus-square-foot apartment was more than sufficient and comfortable in Pastor’s eyes. When Stiles finally finished arranging the furniture, he left Pastor alone to get used to his new surroundings. Just as Pastor was about to catch the end of one of his judge shows, he heard a knock on the door.
“Who could this be? Maybe a welcome committee,” Pastor joked as he ambled over to answer the door.
Much to his surprise, when he looked through the peephole, he saw his daughter-in-law on the other side and quickly opened the door to welcome her in. “My, my, my. Come on in here, Detria.”
Detria stepped inside and looked around the furnished apartment. It looked totally different from when she, Pastor, and Stiles first took a tour of a model apartment at Kirby Pines.
“This is really nice, Pastor. Of course, you’re going to have to let me put my feminine touches on the place,” she said. She continued to walk through the apartment until she had visited each area.
“So, I guess I have your stamp of approval, huh?”
“Yes, you do. My hubby did a good job placing the furniture in the right position. I’ll have to give him a pat on the back when I get home.” Detria laughed.
“Sit down,” he offered, and Detria did so on the brown and tan sofa.
“I see you’re watching Judge Judy. I don’t know if Judge Mathis will like that,” she teased.
Pastor chuckled lightly and sat down in his chair across from Detria.
“So, tell me, what brings you here, child?”
“I was on my way to help Stiles with the finishing touches, but he called and told me he had already left. I decided to come by, anyway. I wanted to see for myself what I need to do to help make your new place comfortable for you.”
“That’s mighty kind of you, but I think I have everything I need. The Lord has been good to me. Real good.” Pastor didn’t sound overly rece
ptive to Detria, but he wasn’t rude to her, either.
Detria placed both hands on her lap. The two of them watched the remaining case on Judge Judy. When the television show ended and a commercial came on, Detria spoke up.
“Pastor, I want to talk to you again about what I did to—”
Pastor raised one hand toward Detria. “No. Stop it. No need to go there. We’ve already talked about it. As far as I’m concerned, that’s over and done with. I’m not going to sit here and pretend like I don’t think about what you did. I’m human, and what you did hurt me more than physically. But I’m also a man of God. I have to forgive. God commands me to do so. I’ve been a preacher since I was a youngster. I’ve heard confessions from people that you wouldn’t believe. I’ve had to keep confidences of people who’ve done and said awful things. But if God can forgive us, then who am I not to find it in my heart to forgive you? You’re my daughter-in-law and I still love you. I won’t allow a wall of anger to keep me from receiving all that God has for me.” His words still came out slowly, but he spoke clearly.
Detria shed tears that she quickly wiped away with her fingers. “Thank you, Pastor. I don’t see how you do it. I don’t understand it. God knows you’re a better person than I ever could be. If I were you, there’s no way I could forgive a person who treated me the way I treated you. But I don’t know what to do from here.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know what to do about Stiles. I’ve been wrestling with whether to tell him that I was the one who hurt you. I don’t want to deceive my husband. I don’t want someone else taking the blame for something that I am responsible for doing.”
“That’s a decision you’re going to have to make. As for me, as far as I’m concerned, it’s over. I’m fine. There’s no need for me to go running to Stiles and telling him what happened. To be honest, I can’t believe he hasn’t brought it up to me himself. But if he should, then that’s when I’ll tell him that it’s something that you and I have already handled. He may not like that, but that’s the way it’s going to be. Plus, I know you’re sorry, Detria. You didn’t mean to hurt me.”
“Oh, Pastor.” Detria dropped to her knees beside him. “Would you do that for me?” Detria started to cry.
“I know you were going through a lot back then, Detria. I just wish I could have done something to help you, but I couldn’t. I was too sick myself.”
“That’s what I’m talking about.” She got up and sat back on the sofa. “I took advantage of your sickness to abuse you. I was wrong. I know God has forgiven me. I know I’ve begged and pleaded with Him enough.”
“Honey, you don’t have to plead with God. You ought to know that, child. God stands ready to forgive us when we sin. He not only forgives us, but He . . .” Pastor stopped for a moment like he had to catch his next breath. “As far as the east is from the west, so far hath He removed our transgressions from us.” Pastor still knew the Bible like the palm of his hand. Just like Stiles, Pastor could quote the scripture verbatim, stroke or no stroke.
“Yes, you’re right. Part of me wants to leave what I did in the past. The other part of me wants to confess to Stiles.” Her face appeared firmly set, like she was in deep thought.
“All I can tell you is silence holds many words. Don’t say anything to Stiles until you’ve heard from God. As for me saying anything to him, that’s something you don’t have to concern yourself with. Truthfully, I don’t know if Stiles can handle it right now. I mean, it would be like another act of betrayal to him, I’m afraid.”
“That’s exactly what I’m talking about, Pastor. If he finds out that it was me, then he will look at me as betraying him, just like Rena did. I don’t want to do that to him. I love him too much to deceive him. Then again, I love him too much to tell him. I just want us to move on with our lives together, Pastor. I want to prove to him that I can be the wonderful wife he thinks I am. I don’t want to walk around pretending to be someone that I’m not. I’m just me,” Detria said.
“That’s who you should be. God made you unique. His Word says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. Let me tell you this.”
“What is it?”
“If you ever decide that you want to tell Stiles, let me know. We’ll tell him together. How about that?”
Detria popped up from the sofa again. She ran back over, got on her knees, and hugged Pastor gently around his waist. She rested her head on his lap and cried. “Thank you, Pastor. Thank you so much.”
Detria looked up and wiped her tears away. “How can you be so forgiving after I was so terrible to you? How can you still love me and accept me as your daughter-in-law?” she cried.
“Because, my child, we all fall short. We’re all imperfect beings. That’s why our Lord and Savior had to die for us. We couldn’t save ourselves, so He did it for us. You have to trust Him, baby. If you decide to talk to your husband, trust that God will work it out. There is nothing too hard for Him.”
Detria got up off her knees. She looked at Pastor with watery eyes. “Thank you, Pastor.”
“You have nothing to thank me for. All the times I’ve made mistakes in my life, and yet God saw fit to forgive me. Shucks.” He laughed. “All of the times I made Audrey upset, but one thing about her, she wouldn’t hold a grudge against me. Not once. I miss that woman.” His bold black eyes revealed a look of intensity and longing.
“I know you miss First Lady Audrey. I do too. I hope I can have the strength and fortitude she had one day. I hope I can be as good a wife to Stiles as she was to you. That’s what I desire, Pastor.”
“God will give you the desires of your heart. You have to ask Him, and then you have to believe that He will do that which you ask.”
“I will. It’s time for me to move forward with my life. I can’t keep holding on to my hurt, either. If I do, then I’ll find myself stuck with no place to go.”
Pastor struggled to get up from his chair. Detria reached out her hands to help him steady himself, but he refused her help.
“I won’t have you and Stiles around here. I need to learn how to get around this place by myself.”
Detria stepped back. “Excuse me, then,” she said. She stood back and watched him maneuver until he stood straight.
Detria clapped her hands. “Great job. You’re going to be over in the recreational area dancing with the ladies soon.”
“I just might,” Pastor laughed.
They walked to the door. Detria turned and embraced Pastor again. “Thanks, Pastor. I love you.”
“I love you, too, baby.”
“I’ll call and check on you later tonight, before we go to bed. And I’m going to bring some things over here to spruce up this place.”
“Sounds good. Sounds real good.”
Detria opened the door and stepped outside onto the porch. “Is there anything you need before I leave?”
“No, I have plenty of everything. You go on home and be with your husband. I’ll be just fine.”
They said their final good-byes before Pastor closed the door and returned to his favorite chair.
On her way home, Detria thought about the frank conversation she’d had with Pastor. “God, I need you. I need your guidance and direction,” she prayed. “I can’t live a life of deceit. I want to tell Stiles everything. Help me. Give me the words to say. Let him be receptive and not close me out, Lord. I love my husband. I want things to work out between us. Amen.”
Detria continued the drive home. She stopped at one of the grocery stores she frequented that was close to home. At the spur of the moment, she decided to prepare a special meal for herself and Stiles. She chose two nice thick rib eye steaks, the fixings for a Caesar salad, two acorn squash, dinner rolls, and a bunch of fresh broccoli.
She arrived home. Stiles wasn’t there, which was fine with Detria. She went upstairs and changed into her favorite pair of house sweats and a T-shirt, then returned to the kitchen to prepare a delicious meal.
While her stea
ks were broiling, Detria called and told Pastor about her decision to talk to Stiles. He reassured her that he believed she was doing the right thing, and he said he would be there if she needed him. She followed up by calling Brooke.
“Brooke, I’m going to tell him,” she said as soon as Brooke answered her phone.
“Tell who what?” Brooke asked.
“Uggg, I’m going to tell Stiles about, you know . . . Pastor,” she reminded her.
“Oh that. Are you sure you want to do that? You may be opening up a can of worms, Detria. Like I told you, I think Stiles would forgive you. It may be hard for him initially, but something in my spirit tells me that he loves you too much to lose you. Then again, you know him better than I do, and telling him the truth could backfire and put your marriage in jeopardy. The bottom line is that it’s your call.”
“I know, which is why I’m so confused. I talked with Pastor again. He’s settled into Kirby Pines, so I went to see him.”
“How is that place?” Brooke asked. “I’ve heard people say it’s really nice.”
“Yeah, it is. I think Pastor is going to enjoy being on his own again. Plus, they have care providers round-the-clock.”
“I can’t believe that Stiles went for him living in an assisted-living community after everything that’s happened.”
“Pastor has his own mind. He wasn’t about to come back and live with us. And you know how I felt about it.”
“I hear you,” Brooke remarked.
“I think it’ll be better for our marriage, and it’ll give Pastor the independence he needs. But, anyway, we’ll talk about that some other time. I’m cooking a nice dinner for Stiles. While we’re eating, I’m going to just come out and tell him. I will not be another Rena. I’m not going to hide anything from my husband.”
“I heard that. I’ll tell you what, girl. I admire you. You’re a bigger woman than me because I don’t know if I could confess something like that to John. I’d be too scared that he’d walk out on me. Whatever you decide, you know I’ve got your back. You are a wonderful person. I know that. Pastor knows that, and Stiles knows it, too. If Pastor Graham could find it in his heart to forgive you, why wouldn’t Stiles do the same? I believe he will.”
My Son's Next Wife Page 19
