Tilly's Story

by June Francis

  ‘Here we are,’ said Wendy, stopping outside a shop. She opened the door, causing a bell to tinkle overheard and they went inside.

  A middle-aged woman was reading a newspaper spread open on the counter. She was sucking a gobstopper and it fell out of her mouth and onto the newspaper when she looked up. ‘Now, see what yer made me do! What are you doing here, Wendy? Is there summit wrong that yer back this early?’

  ‘No. I’ve just brought Miss Moran here to take a look at Uncle Robbie’s old room. She’s moving in as our lodger.’

  ‘Bloomin’ hell, I didn’t expect yer mam to rent it out that quick. The dust has hardly settled since Mr Bennett left.’ She picked up the gobstopper and stuck it back in her mouth.

  Wendy sighed. ‘You’ve ruined that newspaper. Tilly, this is Mrs Pain, a neighbour from the street where we used to live.’

  ‘How d’you do?’ said Tilly, holding out her hand.

  Mrs Pain removed the gobstopper and placed it in the pocket of her pinny. ‘Fair to middlin’,’ she said, shaking Tilly’s hand. ‘Yous aren’t from around here, are yer? Where are yer from?’

  ‘Chester.’

  Mrs Pain made a face. ‘Posh area, hey! What are yer doing coming over here? Gorra job?’

  ‘Not over here I haven’t but hopefully I soon will,’ said Tilly.

  ‘Miss Moran works in an office. She types and is going to write a novel,’ said Wendy.

  Mrs Pain stared at Tilly. ‘Should I have seen yer name in the Echo?’

  ‘I doubt you’ll remember. I wrote about the death of the thief who tried to steal the takings from the Palladium. He disguised himself by wearing different wigs.’

  Mrs Pain’s eyes widened. ‘Bloomin’ hell. I remember reading about him. Real nutcase. Fancy that being yous that wrote it. Clever. I can just about write me name but I’ll turn me hand to anyfin to earn a crust. Lost me man early in our marriage to consumption.’ A shadow crossed her face. ‘But life has to go on. If yer make it rich then let me know if yer need a cleaner.’

  Tilly could not help grinning. The woman was a real character and showed courage. ‘I’ve got to get an ordinary job first.’

  ‘That would be an office job,’ said Mrs Pain. ‘I clean some offices. I’ll keep me ears open for yer.’

  ‘Thanks,’ said Tilly, delighted to have made such a contact. ‘I have typing skills and a reasonably good head for figures.’

  ‘Yer mean yer can add up and take away and balance the books?’

  ‘Hopefully, yes.’

  ‘When you two have finished, we’d best get going upstairs,’ said Wendy as she unfastened a small bolt under the counter and lifted the flap. ‘Come on, Tilly.’

  She led the way into a sitting room and showed Tilly that behind that was a kitchen and then a scullery that opened onto the backyard. ‘There’s the lavatory down at the bottom,’ said Wendy.

  Tilly schooled her face to not show what she was feeling. It would be OK in summer skipping down the yard but not in winter. ‘Nice big yard,’ she said.

  ‘Yeah. Mam had the dividing wall knocked down, that’s why it’s so big,’ said Wendy. ‘Here’s the bath,’ she added, hitting it with her fist where it hung on a whitewashed wall. A clanking, rumbling noise reverberated inside. We have to chase the lads out if us girls want a bath in front of the fire. I’ll show you upstairs now.’

  Tilly was led along a dark short passage and up a flight of stairs. She was hoping the bedroom was big enough to hold a desk for her typewriter. She had not thought to ask whether the room came furnished or not and was soon to find out.

  Wendy clicked on the electric light and gazed about the bedroom. ‘Not bad, is it?’

  Tilly gave a sigh of relief at the sight of the walnut tallboy, the matching dressing table, a cushioned wicker chair and the three-quarter bed. There were also shelves in the alcoves either side of the fireplace and a stand with a bowl and a jug, and still there was plenty of room over by the window for her desk and chair. ‘It’s great,’ she said.

  ‘Minnie and I share and so do the boys. We have the back rooms and Mam has the other front room. I hope you won’t be disturbed too much by the traffic.’

  ‘I’ll have to get used to it,’ said Tilly, unable to imagine finding anywhere as large for the money with two meals a day thrown in, as well. She went over to the window and gazed out at the shops on the other side of West Derby Road. ‘I’m really pleased.’

  Wendy smiled. ‘We’d best get back to the party then.’

  Tilly nodded. ‘The others will be wanting to go soon because they won’t want to miss the luggage boat.’

  But it was obvious when they arrived back at the party that Clara and Freddie were enjoying themselves too much to make a move yet. As it was, Tilly was not to get to see Alice that evening to break the news to her because they missed the luggage boat and ended up staying at the Arcadia Hotel on Mount Pleasant. The three women had to share a double bed in one room and the men in another. Hanny was worried not only about the twins and what Alice might say when they arrived home the following day but also about her elderly mother.

  ‘There’s nothing you can do about it,’ said Tilly, snuggling up against her back.

  ‘I’m sorry that this happened,’ said Clara. ‘But it’s not often Freddie and I get the chance to dance together and what with the baby we’ll soon have even less chance.’

  ‘It’s all right, love,’ said Hanny. ‘I’m sure Seb will realise what’s happened and will look in on my mother. Don’t you agree, Tilly?’

  ‘Yes,’ said Tilly, although she was not so worried about Seb’s reaction to their staying out all night as her sister’s.

  Chapter Five

  ‘Well, I think you all had a nerve staying out all night,’ said Alice, across the dining table to Tilly on Monday morning. She had not spoken to her at all on Sunday.

  Tilly looked up from her breakfast plate and swallowed a mouthful of porridge. ‘You didn’t say that to the others when they dropped me off.’

  ‘I didn’t have to because I’m sure they knew how I felt.’

  ‘And you think I didn’t?’ asked Tilly.

  ‘You’re not a mother,’ said Alice.

  ‘Neither is Clara yet. Besides, I don’t know what being a mother has to do with us missing the luggage boat and staying overnight in Liverpool.’

  ‘Did you see Father?’ asked Alice.

  Tilly stiffened, wondering what her sister would say if she told her about the tiny baby skeleton he had shown her and how they planned to re-bury it.

  ‘That was a question best not asked,’ murmured Seb, looking up from the pages of a motor catalogue he was perusing as he had finished his breakfast.

  ‘I don’t see why,’ said Alice, bristling. ‘Whose side are you on, anyway, Seb? I know you’ve never been able to understand my feelings about Dad.’

  James and Flora raised their heads from their plates and looked first at their mother and then their father.

  ‘That’s not true,’ he said firmly. ‘And we’ve been through this before.’

  ‘I’m not having him come here, trying to make friends with the children,’ said Alice.

  The last thing Tilly wanted was to come between husband and wife. ‘I’m sure I’ve told you before that he won’t be coming here,’ she said, glancing at her nephews and niece. ‘Although, he’s perfectly safe. I’ll be moving out this coming weekend. I’ve found somewhere to stay and I’ll be looking for a job once I’m living in Liverpool. I’ll be within walking distance of Dad and Joy will be there, keeping her eye on him, as well.’

  Alice thumped down the jug of milk she’d just picked up. ‘I can’t believe it! You mean you’ve found somewhere already?’

  Georgie, the youngest, looked up. ‘You’re going to break that, Mummy, if you’re not careful. You’ve slopped milk all over the tablecloth. If I’d done that you’d have been cross.’

  She frowned him down. ‘I am cross with your Auntie Tilly. Obviously, she does n
ot want to spend her birthday with us. After all these years she’s found someone she thinks is better to share it with.’

  ‘You mean Granddad,’ said James, nodding his head sagely. ‘I remember him from last year. I’d like to see him again. There’s not many boys at school that have a live granddad.’

  ‘There’s children in school that don’t have a daddy,’ said Flora, sighing.

  ‘Well, you have, so you don’t need a granddad,’ snapped Alice. She turned on her sister. ‘See what you’ve started?’

  ‘I didn’t start anything,’ said Tilly indignantly. ‘It’s you that started it by asking me a question that you already knew the answer to. You were just looking for an argument. I’d rather leave on good terms with you than be arguing.’

  Alice’s cheeks flamed. ‘I’m not looking for an argument. I still think you’re too young to live away from home but I’m not going to stand in your way. Hopefully, you’ll soon realise you’ve made a mistake and which side your bread’s buttered on. Where are these digs you’ve found?’

  ‘Over a shop that belongs to the other Mr Bennett’s sister, Mrs Wright. She’s renting out his old bedroom to me.’

  ‘And how much is that going to cost you?’

  ‘Twelve shillings and sixpence,’ said Tilly, ‘and well worth the money.’

  ‘You’ve seen it, then?’

  ‘Yes!’

  Alice stared at her. ‘You’ll soon be out of pocket and begging to come home.’

  ‘No, I won’t. I’ve some savings and I’ll soon find a job,’ said Tilly.

  ‘I think you’re making a mistake, Tilly, but I’m not going to stand in your way,’ said Seb, pushing back his chair and getting to his feet. ‘We’ll miss you at the office.’

  Her face softened as she looked up at him. ‘But you shouldn’t have any trouble finding a replacement.’

  ‘No. But you’ll be needing a reference. I’ll write one out for you.’

  A reference! She had not thought of that. ‘Thanks,’ she said gratefully.

  He smiled faintly. ‘I think for the peace of the household you’ve got to spread your wings. Just be aware that Alice does know your father better than you do.’

  ‘Thanks for that,’ muttered Alice, getting up.

  ‘I’d like to know what Grandfather did to make Mummy hate him so,’ said Flora.

  ‘Don’t you start,’ warned Alice. ‘I’ll not have your grandfather mentioned in this house. Now finish your breakfast.’

  ‘I’ve had enough,’ said Tilly, her expression tight. ‘If you’ll all excuse me. I’m going to my bedroom to pack.’

  ‘You don’t mean you’ve changed your mind and have decided to go today?’ said Seb, startled.

  ‘Yes! Because Alice is going on about Dad again. Although,’ Tilly paused. ‘I suppose I should really work out my notice?’

  ‘That won’t be necessary if you want to be off as soon as possible,’ said Seb, sighing. ‘But it might be sensible if you stay until you find a job in Liverpool.’

  ‘I feel I’ve a better chance of doing that living over there.’

  He nodded. ‘If that’s how you feel.’

  Alice’s face quivered. ‘We’ll need an address,’ she said harshly.

  Tilly stood, resting her hands on the back of her chair. ‘I can’t remember the number of the shop but I’m sure if you address it care of Wright’s newsagent’s and sweetshop, West Derby Road, Liverpool, then any letters will get there. I mean Don might…’ Her voice trailed off and without another word she left the dining room.

  After she had packed most of her clothes and placed some books in a box, along with another cardboard box containing typing paper, carbon paper and a spare typewriting ribbon inside it, on her desk, she knew that she was going to need help to get it all to Liverpool. She decided to ask her half-brother if he could arrange it, but before doing so she checked how much money she had. She had been paid on Friday and after giving Alice money for her keep, she still had a couple of shillings left, as well as several pounds in loose change in a tin in the bottom of her wardrobe. Hopefully this would see her through the next month.

  Ten minutes later she was in Kenny and Hanny’s kitchen telling them her plans. She could tell from his expression that her half-brother was still not in favour of her aims.

  ‘I still think you’re too young,’ he said.

  ‘Alice said I was too old in the head for my age and that’s because you and Hanny never treated me like a child. Have some faith in me, Kenny. I’ll be seventeen soon. I’m quite sensible, you know. I swear if I get into difficulties I’ll be in touch. I’m only crossing the Mersey, not the Atlantic.’

  Kenny’s expression thawed. ‘It’s not a matter of not having faith in you, love. I know you can be sensible and you’re not going far but Liverpool isn’t like Chester. It’s a port and has all the glamour and excitement and trouble that’s attached to ports. It also has more poverty and social unrest, as well. Not to mention the religious divides.’

  ‘But I won’t be living down by the docks. I’ll be living with a family,’ said Tilly. ‘And Joy won’t be far away. Surely you can trust Joy to keep her eye on me?’

  ‘I suppose so,’ he said grudgingly, glancing at Hanny. ‘For a moment I’d forgotten about your sister being over there.’ He put an arm about Tilly’s shoulders. ‘OK. I give you my blessing. But you do realise this will be the first time I won’t be seeing you on your birthday.’

  ‘It can’t be helped,’ said Tilly, thinking of her father. Her sixteenth birthday last year was the first time he had shared in her special day. She was hoping that this year they would be able to spend her seventeenth birthday together but decided to not mention that to Kenny.

  ‘I’ll get Freddie to load your stuff in the back of the car and he can drive you to Liverpool.’

  ‘You think he’ll manage to get my desk and chair in as well as everything else?’ asked Tilly.

  ‘With the hood down?’ said Kenny, thoughtfully. ‘I’m sure he’ll think of someway of getting them in.’

  ‘Of course, he will,’ said Hanny, glancing up from her knitting. ‘He’s very resourceful, my brother. We are going to miss you, though, Tilly.’

  ‘I’ll miss you, too.’ Tilly bent and kissed her. ‘I will be back to see you.’

  Hanny touched her cheek. ‘You make sure you are. If you need help at any time get in touch.’

  On the way out of the house, Kenny slipped an envelope into Tilly’s pocket. She looked at him. ‘Birthday card,’ he said.

  Tilly thanked him and walked down the path to her sister’s home.

  * * *

  A few hours later during lunchtime, Alice, Seb and the children stood at the gate, watching Tilly climb into the front passenger seat. ‘So you’re off,’ said Alice, her expression taut.

  ‘It looks like it,’ said Tilly, smiling brightly despite the tightness in her chest and the prickle of tears behind her eyes.

  ‘You will be coming back, Auntie Tilly, won’t you?’ called Flora.

  ‘Of course,’ said Tilly, blowing her a kiss. ‘You’re all my favourites.’

  ‘Will you be bringing us a present?’ asked Georgie, skipping over to the car and climbing on the running board.

  ‘You don’t ask questions like that,’ said Alice, following him over and dragging him down. ‘Now say goodbye to Auntie Tilly.’

  ‘Goodbye, Auntie Tilly,’ said Georgie, and he blew her several kisses.

  Tilly mimed catching them. ‘I’ll keep these close to my heart,’ she said.

  Alice made a noise in her throat as if to say Don’t be silly.

  ‘I’ll see you then,’ said Tilly.

  ‘OK! Get going,’ said Alice, sounding impatient. ‘Father will be waiting.’

  Tilly had been about to say I’m going to miss you, Alice, but her sister’s words so annoyed her that instead all she said was a bright sounding ‘Bye, everyone!’ She waved.

  Freddie had already started the engine and
now sat a moment, gazing sidelong at her, his elbows resting on the steering wheel. ‘You all right?’

  ‘Why shouldn’t I be?’ she said in a tight little voice.

  ‘I remember the first time I went to sea, I wanted to howl but I had to get over it and I did. At least you’re not going far and there’s no war about to break out.’

  ‘Thank God,’ she muttered.

  ‘Yes, indeedy,’ said Freddie, and with a toot on the horn, he drove off along the familiar crescent towards the Old Dee Bridge and Tilly’s new life.

  She was in no mood to talk. She felt a little scared despite all the reassurances she had given her brother that she was grown-up now, sensible and able to cope out there in the big wide world. After all, it was true that she was not going far, but she was going to have to watch her money, so would not be able to visit Chester as often as she might like. Of course, if she didn’t find a job pretty soon then she might have to slink back home like a dog with its tail between its legs. She tilted her chin. No! Whatever happened she was not going back until she made a success of this move and proved to her family that she could truly survive independently of them. She thought of Don and wondered if he had lived close by how different her life might have been. But then, with his profession, he would still have left her for weeks or months on end. She sighed. No. She had to make a life for herself, as well as spend as much time as she could with her father. After all, she did not know how many more years he had left to live.

  ‘You’ll be able to phone the office if you need to chat,’ said Freddie, rousing Tilly from her musings.

  ‘Of course,’ she responded. ‘But I don’t plan on making a habit of it. I have to stand on my own two feet. If I phone it’ll be questions, questions, questions. Besides, it’ll cost money and I’m going to need every penny I have.’

  ‘You’ll be applying for jobs.’

  ‘I’ll have to, I can’t live on air,’ she said crossly.

  ‘No. None of us can. I was just making conversation but perhaps I’d be best concentrating on the traffic and leaving you in peace.’