Love Me Before Dawn

by Lindsay McKenna

  She reached out to touch his left hand. “Okay.” Her blue eyes darkened with uncertainty. “It’s the best I can do under the circumstances, Shep.”

  He finished putting on the second sock and turned to her, gripping her gently by the shoulders. He gazed deeply into her eye. “It’s more than enough, honey,” he whispered huskily. “Come on, you’ve got a half hour before we have to leave,” he coaxed, leaning over and lightly kissing her mouth.

  *

  There was a ribbon of pink above the mountains in the distance, suffusing the bone-white desert with a pale wash of rose-colored light. Tess sat in silence as Shep drove across the deserted highways toward the Operations building. A huge control tower rose out of it, looking oddly out of place on the dry desert lakebeds that surrounded Edwards. The only other creatures moving in the early morning were an occasional jack-rabbit or cottontail. Shep had loaned her one of his Air Force flight jackets to keep her warm in the predawn hours. He had made coffee for both of them and she cradled the mug in her hands as he drove.

  “I’ll have to call in to Rockwell at eight o’clock.”

  Shep nodded. “Tom is going to meet me over at Ops. I’m sure he won’t mind escorting you around while I do my two hours of proficiency flying. He’ll show you where the phones are located so you can make the call.”

  Tess nodded. How could she begin to explain to Shep how comfortable she felt in his presence? Her body still felt warm from their passionate lovemaking. Each time he looked at her with those knowing gray eyes, she melted inwardly to the core. She had never trusted anyone as much. “I owe you an apology,” she murmured, thinking of the angry slap she had delivered the previous night.

  He glanced over at her, a wry smile touching his mouth. “No, you don’t. You owe it to yourself to start living again. And you’re starting to do that.”

  A blush spread across her face. “I didn’t mean to slap you….” Her voice became inaudible. “I’ve never hit anyone, Shep—”

  “I wanted to paddle you,” he admitted. There was amusement in his tone. “I can see why you have red hair now,” he chuckled.

  Tess stared over at him. “That isn’t funny, Shep. I hurt you.”

  He laughed fully. “You hurt my pride more than my face. I didn’t think you’d really do it. I saw it in your eyes and I said, no, she won’t do that. She wouldn’t have the nerve.” His eyes crinkled. “I was wrong. It forced me to quit treating you like some lost waif. I figured if you were woman enough to strike out like that, you were woman enough to take the consequences.”

  “I’m just glad you didn’t hit back,” she murmured, relief in her voice.

  “I may do many things, Tess,” he answered gravely, “but I’d never hit a woman.”

  “I didn’t mean to imply that,” she said quickly. “It’s just that you were accusing me of running away, but I didn’t. I was so angry at you. You never let me get a word in edgewise.”

  Shep reached out, capturing her free hand and giving it a squeeze of reassurance. “I had all day to think about it, Tess. And I sure as hell wasn’t prepared to see you on my couch asleep when I got home. I thought you had deserted me. I didn’t know what to think when I saw you there.”

  Her voice became softer. “Shep, I got called in to Rockwell on an emergency at seven A.M. Sunday morning by the PR department. Stockwell dropped another of his unfounded allegations. We had every major East Coast paper calling us. And then we handled at least twenty-five calls from each time zone.” She shook her head. “It was horrible. I wasn’t prepared to help Fred do something his department should have handled. But everyone was out of town and I ended up getting stuck with it.” She chewed on her lower lip. “I tried to call you so many times, Shep. I finally got in touch with Tom and explained the situation. He thought it would be best if I came up here to try and straighten things out.” Her voice trembled. “I was so worried about you, Shep. Tom was worried too. I could tell.”

  His hand tightened about hers. “I just drove around all day thinking and spent a lot of time talking to myself,” he admitted quietly. He gave her a piercing look. “You mean a hell of a lot to me, Tess. I thought I’d lost you. I felt so damn helpless.”

  Her heart was buoyed up by his admission. The strength of his love was undeniable. A pulse leaped at the base of her throat. Love? Tess gave him a brief, startled look, trying to hide her reaction. Making an effort to quell her pounding heart, she said, “I understand that now.”

  Chapter 11

  IT WAS ONE OF THE FEW TIMES TESS HAD BEEN TO THE Operations building. “Ops,” as it was commonly called, housed a briefing area and a meteorology office as well as a control tower. It was from this building that the test flights originated. Shep escorted her through the doors, his left hand on her elbow. He carried a duffel bag that contained his helmet and oxygen mask in his right hand. Tom Cunningham greeted them in the spacious entrance attired in his blue uniform and flight cap.

  “See you made it home last night, buddy.”

  Shep shared a brief smile with his friend. “I don’t know whether I should shake your hand or call you a few choice names,” he said.

  Tom grinned mischievously, coming over. “You’ll thank me sooner or later,” he said.

  “Tess is going to stick around until I get my proficiency flight out of the way. Mind keeping her company?”

  “Not at all. You go ahead and pick up your flight plan.” He looked over at Tess. “Come on, I’ll show you how test pilots keep their skills up to par while he’s getting briefed.”

  Shep leaned over, placing a kiss on her lips. As he drew away he said, “You’ll be bored as hell watching me bump and go.”

  She liked the lingo of the Air Force pilots. Bump and go simply meant that the aircraft would land on the runway and then take off moments later. Her lips tingled warmly beneath his mouth and she said, “I don’t think anything you do is boring.”

  Shep gave her a long, appraising look, a smile lingering in his gray eyes. He looked up at Tom. “Hey, buddy, you might see if they’ll let you up in the tower to listen to transmissions.”

  Tom’s brows raised. “Good idea.”

  “I’ve got an hour’s worth of high altitude flight to do first. You might take Tess to get a bite to eat over at the cafeteria. See you two later.” He waved to them and walked down the highly polished hall toward the briefing room. Tess fell in step beside Tom as he ambled toward the opposite side of the building to the lounge.

  “Well?” Tom asked, glancing over at her. “How’d it go?”

  “It was rough,” she murmured, glad to be able to confide in him. “I fell asleep on the couch and didn’t hear him come in. I don’t know who was more shocked. Him or me.”

  Tom allowed a small grin to surface. “You both look pretty happy now. Matter of fact, Shep looks like he’s on top of the world.”

  She slowed her pace as they neared the glass doors. The rose wash that had given the white lake beds a pink hue was now gone. The sun was edging above the desert horizon, its rays creating long shadows across the bare landscape. Jets of all sizes and types stood silently on the ramp to the left of the tower. Some were camouflaged green and brown, others were white. Ground crews worked around several preparing them for flight. Tanker trucks filled with JP-4, the fuel used by jet aircraft, traveled up and down the line, filling the awaiting planes. The sun’s rays warmed the lounge area. Tess crossed her arms, watching the scene before them.

  “He thought I had run away,” she murmured, “again.”

  “And?”

  “He was pretty angry,” she admitted, and then frowned, remembering the confrontation the night before. “I don’t blame him.”

  “Shep cools off pretty quickly, though. I’m glad to see you could stay around today.”

  “I have to call Rockwell at eight and tell them I’m coming in this afternoon.”

  He pursed his lips. “Something’s better than nothing under the circumstances,” he said.

  “Ye
s,” she agreed fervently, “it is.”

  At seven thirty, Tess saw Shep emerging from Ops. One of the crew chiefs escorted him to a T-38. Tom pointed toward the sleek supersonic jet aircraft. “The T-38 is utilized as a supersonic trainer and chase plane for test flights. Normally the instructor sits in the rear seat and the student in the front.”

  “But he’s going to fly it alone,” Tess said, wondering if he should have a copilot in case something went wrong.

  “When a test pilot isn’t getting enough flying time in because things are slow, we all fly the T-38. It’s a standard trainer. It’s a twin jet-engine aircraft that handles real nice. You look worried.”

  She shrugged. “I thought if there were two seats, that automatically meant two pilots.”

  “It’s not mandatory to fly with a copilot. Relax, he’ll be all right. This is just standard flying.” Tom smiled. “God, what will you do if he’s picked to be the first Air Force officer to make the test flight of the B-1?”

  She laughed. “Be a basket case.” The ladder was placed on the side of the T-38 and Shep gingerly climbed into the front cockpit seat. The crew chief helped him strap in, giving Shep some last-minute information. Tess had to admit the T-38 was a sleek-looking aircraft. Still, she thought that the B-1, for its size, looked even more beautiful.

  Tom’s comment about Shep possibly being chosen to fly the B-1 sent an unexpected jolt of fear through her. She absentmindedly chewed on one of her nails as she watched the ground crew remove the ladder and pull the parking chocks out from beneath the wheels of the T-38. Even through the thick windows of the lounge area, they could hear the high-pitched whine of the engines on the aircraft. With the white helmet on his head and the dark green sun visor drawn down against the oxygen mask, Tess couldn’t tell Shep from any other pilot. She watched as the canopy slowly closed down over him. Shep gave a thumbs up signal to the crew chief, moving the T-38 out of the confines of the ramp and onto the taxi strip.

  “Can we go outside and watch him take off?” she asked Tom, a tremor of excitement in her voice.

  He smiled indulgently. “Sure. Knowing that you’re watching him, Shep will probably light the afterburners and give us a real bang.”

  There was more jet traffic than Tess would have expected at that early morning hour. At least five types of Air Force jets, ranging from another T-38 to a huge cargo plane known as a C-130 Hercules, were flying at different altitudes around the huge base doing bump and go landings. The sun warmed Tess as she stood on the balcony in the clear morning air. She loved the clean, fresh air of the desert. Sunlight glanced off the glistening white skin of the T-38 that Shep piloted. At the end of the taxi strip, he brought the plane to a halt. The C-130 dropped in like a mammoth seagull, its four turboprop engines whining as it sped past them, briefly landing. Halfway down the airstrip the cargo plane’s engines revved up as it took off once again, pointing its nose upward into the crystal morning air.

  Tom leaned over. “Shep should be next to take off. The tower will wait about a minute before letting him go. The backwash of those propeller jobs creates a whorling wind effect. If you take off too soon afterward, it can flip a plane on its wing and cause a crash.”

  “Is that why they always have a few minutes between takeoffs and landings?” she wondered aloud, shading her eyes against the sun’s brilliance.

  “Yes, ma’am. Now listen. You’ll hear those engines in the T-38 start shrilling in a moment. Those babies can cause you to go deaf if you don’t take proper precautions. That’s why the crews all wear protective ear gear around them. There. He’s got the go ahead from the tower.”

  The T-38 moved onto the end of the runway. Tess could hear the engines becoming shrill as Shep held the plane with the brakes. The morning quiet was shattered as he started the T-38 rolling down the strip. The afterburners, which provided sudden forward thrust, were lit. With an explosion of sound, the jet leaped forward like an unshackled eagle. Tess watched in awe as the arrowlike jet covered only a few thousand feet of runway before lifting off. She heard Tom laugh.

  “That showoff! Watch him. He’s gonna take that plane straight up at the end of the runway!”

  Her breath lodged in her throat as the plane suddenly lunged skyward at an almost impossible angle of attack as it hurtled into the blue. She had no idea how many thousand of feet per second the agile T-38 could climb. Rapidly the plane became a small speck, the thundering sound of the afterburners dying away very quickly. Tom turned to her.

  “Pretty impressive, isn’t it?”

  She nodded. “Very. And you do the same thing?”

  “If I had my girl watching, I would,” he returned, grinning. “Come on; I’ll treat you to breakfast. It will be at least an hour before he comes back to complete the bump and go’s.”

  She was surprised at the number of people in the civilian-run cafeteria. Clusters of mechanics, pilots in their olive green flight suits and various other uniformed personnel sat grouped at the tables. Tom escorted her through the line and then chose a small table in one corner near the window.

  Tess had just sat down and was getting comfortable when she gazed across the room and turned pale. Tom sat opposite her, his tray piled high with enough breakfast for two people. A strangled sound emerged from her throat as her eyes met those of Derek Barton. Her heart began to beat rapidly; her fingers turned cold.

  “Tess? What’s wrong?”

  She couldn’t tear her gaze from Barton’s. He had been watching her all along. Her stomach knotted and blood pounded through her head, cutting off all other sounds.

  “Tess? God, you’re pale. What’s wrong?” Tom leaned across the table, reaching out to touch her arm.

  The warmth of his fingers broke the shock. Automatically, she pulled her arm away from him, lowering her eyes to her tray in confusion. Derek Barton was here! Oh, God. Her sudden shock was overcome by anger. He had helped kill Cy, she screamed silently, fighting back tears. The filthy little rat of a man had told a lie. A lie that had killed her husband. She was vaguely aware of Tom talking to her. His voice was low, filled with concern. Biting down hard on her lower lip, Tess raised her head, meeting Tom’s worried eyes.

  “Barton’s here,” she rasped, clenching the napkin tightly in her lap, her fingers whitening.

  Tom cocked his head to one side. “Barton?” His eyes suddenly narrowed. “That bastard’s here?” he muttered. “Where?”

  Tess was shaken by the major’s vehement reaction. Thank God Shep wasn’t here.

  “Never mind!” she breathed. Tess closed her eyes for a second, willing her pounding heart to stop beating so heavily. There was nothing she could do about Barton seeing her here. But what would he think? What slimy new gossip would he spread about her? She opened her eyes, staring down at her tray. Suddenly, she wasn’t hungry. She was angry. Angry in a way she had never been before.

  Tom had turned, looking out across the crowded cafeteria. When he turned back, his normally easy features were hard. “I see him,” he snarled. “It’s okay, Tess. Just ignore the little creep. He can’t hurt you anymore.”

  She had an urge to look back over at Barton to see if he was still staring at her but fought the impulse. She took an unsteady gulp of air. “He killed Cy,” she whispered tautly. “He killed him with lies, Tom. Oh, God, I don’t know if I can sit here. …”

  “You have as much right to sit here as he does,” Tom reminded her. He glanced up at her sharply. “You staying or running?”

  Tess jerked her chin up, eyes wide. “No more running, Tom,” she rasped. Her voice sounded strained to her own ears. She had promised herself to start living again. To grow up. It was an uncomfortable situation at best, but she forced herself to pick at the toast and jelly.

  “Atta girl. Barton’s going to get his,” he promised grimly. “It’s just a damn good thing he didn’t run into Shep. He’ll deck him if he sets sights on him.”

  “I feel so much anger toward Barton, Tom. I—I can hardly sit here and eat.�
��

  He gave her a tight smile. “I know. It must be hard under the circumstances, knowing Barton lied and helped trigger your husbands heart attack. But sooner or later, you’ve got to face him. Either here or at a meeting with Rockwell contractors.”

  “I want to wrap my hands around his throat,” she confided.

  “Hey, ease up, Tess. We’ll finish our breakfast and mosey back to Ops.” He glanced at his watch. “We should be going in another ten minutes.”

  Tess sat there, inwardly amazed at the strength of her feelings.

  “I wonder what he’s going to do with this newest bit of gossip?” she asked under her breath.

  “Probably say that you and I are now having a red-hot affair,” Tom suggested, smiling more easily this time.

  Tess couldn’t help but frown. “He’s an ugly man, Tom. I hope you don’t get caught in the middle of this.”

  “I know at least twenty other officers who would turn green with envy if they thought I was going with you.” His brown eyes sparkled. “There are worse things to have people gossip about, you know. Being seen with a pretty lady is always a pleasure, believe me.”

  Tess blushed at the compliment. “Shep and I are both lucky to have you as a friend,” she whispered, meaning it.

  He winked at her. “You’re both worth it. Come on, it looks like you’re done picking at your breakfast. Let’s go over and watch Shep play in the pattern for a while.” He rose and put on his flight cap. “And don’t worry about Barton. We’ve got better things to do than let him ruin our day.”

  Nonetheless, Tess was relieved to leave the cafeteria. She began to breathe easier as they arrived back at Ops. She noticed that several more planes were in the landing pattern around Edwards. Tom took her up a series of stairs until she found herself in the control tower itself. The chief controller nodded in her direction after Tom explained the situation. Tom picked up two headsets.

  “He’s already in the pattern, Tess. Just put this contraption on and you can listen to them talk. His call sign is Hawk six.”