When We Fall

by E. L. Todd

I couldn’t concentrate on anything.

  All I could think about was Conrad. How could Lexie do that to him? Conrad was one of the greatest guys I’ve ever known, and I wasn’t just saying that because he was my cousin. He was honest, loyal, and caring. He looked after me when he didn’t have to, and while we had our arguments when we were younger he always had my back when I needed him.

  It was obvious how much he loved Lexie. He didn’t need to tell me how he felt about her. It was written all over his face the second she walked into the room. Conrad gave her everything he had.

  And that wasn’t good enough?

  Why on earth would she say no? Conrad was perfect. He was smart, funny, and compassionate. He was faithful and a good friend. He was good-looking and would inherit a billion dollar company in just a few months.

  But she still didn’t want him?

  What the hell was wrong with her? I couldn’t focus on anything because I was so upset. Now Conrad took off and no one knew if he was okay. I’d tried calling him a few times but it went straight to voice mail. His inbox was full from all the messages everyone else left.

  Dad knocked before he walked inside. “Hey, pumpkin.”

  “Hey, Dad.” I didn’t bother putting on a mask.

  He looked just as upset. He sat in the chair facing my desk. “You doing okay?”

  “No.” And I wasn’t going to pretend otherwise. I rested my chin in the palm of my hand and released a deep sigh. “I just…how could she do that to him?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “It’s just…wrong.”

  “As upset as I am, something else might have happened. We don’t have all the details.”

  “Like what?” I demanded. “The only excuse she has is if Conrad cheated. And we both know that didn’t happen.”

  Dad shrugged. “Before we grab our knives and pitchforks we should wait.”

  “I’ll give that bitch a piece of my mind.”

  “Skye.” Dad gave me a stern look. “Leave her alone.”

  “Fine, I won’t go seek her out. But if I run into her…that’s a different story.”

  Dad didn’t argue with that.

  “I hope he’s okay…”

  “He is,” Dad said. “Mike found him and he’s keeping an eye on him.”

  “He did? Where is he?”

  “Italy.”

  “Well, at least he went somewhere nice. Why hasn’t Mike brought him back?”

  Dad rested his ankle on the opposite knee. “I think he’s giving Conrad the time he needs while making sure he isn’t too reckless.”

  “What’s he doing?” I asked. “Just sitting on the beach all alone?”

  Dad didn’t answer.

  “Poor Conrad. I wish I could fly over there and see him.”

  “He’ll be back soon enough. Mike tells me he’s taking it really hard.”

  “If he hasn’t talked to him, how does he know?”

  Dad paused before he answered. “He can tell just from watching him. He fell hard, Skye. It’ll take a long time to pick him back up.”

  I shook my head. “It’s terrible…”

  “I know. It breaks my heart. Conrad is like a son to me.”

  “He’s like a brother to me.”

  “He’ll be okay, Skye. We just need to support him during this time. Don’t ask him a million questions when he gets back. Try to act normal.”

  “Yeah.” When something was bothering me I didn’t like talking about it, so I understood the feeling well.

  “Anything new with you?” he asked.

  I immediately thought of Cayson and our unstable relationship. I didn’t even know how to describe us anymore. I went to bed one night with the perfect life, but when I woke up the next morning everything was gone. It was almost like it never happened at all. “Nope. Cayson and I are almost finished with the baby’s room.”

  “Congratulations. That’s usually the most time consuming thing other than actually having the baby.”

  “Yeah, but it looks really nice.”

  “Your mother and I are excited to see it.”

  His words made me realize just how complicated my relationship with Cayson was going to become. Eventually, they would catch on to the fact Cayson wasn’t living there anymore. A secret this big was one I couldn’t keep forever. “I’ll let you know when we’re done.”

  “Sounds like a good idea.” Dad rose from the chair. “I should get back to work. You and me are the only people running this place.”

  I smiled. “I think we’re doing a pretty good job.”

  He winked before he walked out. “We make a good team, pumpkin.”

  My smile immediately dropped the moment he was gone.

  ***

  I had a doctor’s appointment and I knew I had to invite Cayson along. It technically involved the baby so I felt obligated to tell him. While I didn’t regret being pregnant, having a child with him made this a million times more difficult. If the baby didn’t exist, I’d have no reason to see him. I wouldn’t have to lie to my family about what happened.

  The baby changed everything.

  I was sitting in my car in the garage of PIXEL when I called him.

  Cayson answered on the first ring, like always. “Hey.”

  “Hey.” It was awkward as usual.

  Cayson remained silent and gave me the floor. He knew the only reason why I called him was for the baby so he didn’t launch into an account of his innocence.

  “I have a check up with the doctor. It’s in thirty minutes.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  “You don’t have work?”

  “You’re more important than work, Skye.”

  “But it’s just a check up for the baby. You don’t need to be there for that.” I was looking for any reason to avoid him.

  “I guess we have a difference of opinion,” he said coolly. “I’ll meet you there.” He hung up without saying goodbye.

  ***

  When I entered the lobby of the doctor’s office, Cayson was already there. He was sitting in a chair with his ankle resting on the opposite knee. He wore a gray suit with a black tie. The suit fit him perfectly and made him look like a powerhouse.

  Cayson looked up at me when I entered, and his crystal blue eyes took me in like they always. Even though he betrayed me when we were apart, he didn’t treat me any differently when he came home. He still looked at me like I was the only woman that existed.

  I hated the fact he looked so handsome. His shoulders were broad and powerful, and the light hair on his chin made him sexy in a rugged way. He stood up when I approached, towering over me with his height. Perhaps I shouldn’t have married such a beautiful man. How did I expect him to be faithful when women through themselves at him left and right?

  “You look beautiful.” He eyed my distended stomach.

  I wore a purple dress that gave my stomach plenty of room. Despite my angry feelings toward him, his compliment made me feel warm. “You got here quickly.”

  “You know me. Twenty minutes early is on time.” He pointed to the chair. “Sit down and I’ll check you in.” Like always, he waited on me hand and foot and put me before himself. How could such a sweet man hurt me like that? Sometimes it didn’t add up.

  “Okay.”

  Cayson approached the counter and signed me in with the nurse. All the women in the lobby stared at his ass in his slacks. Honestly, I couldn’t blame them. The nurse behind the counter seemed smitten with him too.

  Cayson returned to me and took the seat beside me. “Would you like some water or anything?”

  “No, thank you.”

  “Okay.” He took the same position as before then checked his watch. The black wedding band was still around his finger, looking noticeable against his fair skin. As far as I knew he never took it off. When we lived together he didn’t even remove it when he showered or hit the gym.

  I never removed mine either.

  Cayson didn’t make conversation. He was quiet and
kept to himself. Whenever we did things for the baby he was so quiet it was like he wasn’t even there. Perhaps he was trying not to set me off or annoy me.

  “How’s work?” I couldn’t think of anything else to talk about.

  “Fine.” His voice contained his sadness.

  “Conrad?”

  He nodded. “It’s all I can think about. He must feel like shit.”

  “I’m sure he does…”

  “I’m sure he’ll be home soon and we can make him feel better.”

  “I hope I run into Lexie…”

  He turned my way. “I’m sure she doesn’t feel good about herself right now.”

  “Why is everyone pitying her?” I demanded. “She’s the one who acted like a bitch.”

  Cayson didn’t flinch at my anger. “Because it doesn’t add up. It was obvious she was in love with him. There’s something going on that we can’t see. You should always give people the benefit of the doubt.” He gave me a meaningful look before he turned away.

  I crossed my arms over my chest and didn’t look at him again.

  We sat in awkward silence.

  The nurse finally called my name and we headed into a patient room. I grabbed a gown then prepared to change.

  Cayson remained in the chair near the door. It didn’t seem like he was going to leave.

  “I need to change.”

  He didn’t react at all.

  “Cayson, can you step out please?”

  His eyes darkened in offense but he left without protesting.

  After I changed I lay on the thin paper on top of the chair and leaned back.

  Cayson knocked. “Are you done?”

  “Yes.”

  He came inside looking irritated then approached the chair. “Need anything?”

  “I’m fine.”

  He looked down at me, standing tall over me like a guard.

  “You can sit down.”

  “I’m fine where I am.” He put his hands in his pockets then eyed the abstract painting on the wall.

  “You make me nervous when you stand that close to me.”

  He turned my way. “Because you love me.” He said it with complete confidence.

  “No. Because I can’t stand you, actually.”

  “I don’t believe that. Deep down inside, you know I’ve been faithful to you.”

  I turned away. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

  Cayson didn’t press the conversation.

  Fortunately, the doctor came inside with the ultrasound machine then asked me a few routine questions. “Your iron is pretty low, Ms. Preston.”

  “It’s Mrs. Thompson,” Cayson corrected.

  “My apologies.” The doctor flipped through the papers.

  I didn’t argue with him because technically it was my name.

  “I’m worried you may become anemic,” the doctor said. “I’m going to give you an iron supplement.”

  “Will she be okay?” Cayson asked. “Is there any harm to my wife or the baby?”

  I hated it when he called me his wife.

  “They should be fine,” he said. “But I’m going to do a transvaginal ultrasound just to be safe. If there’s any bleeding, we’ll be able to detect it.”

  “What about a regular ultrasound?” Cayson asked.

  “Bleeding isn’t detectable,” The doctor answered.

  What did it matter which ultrasound we did?

  The doctor prepared the gel and the probe. “It’ll be a little uncomfortable but it’ll end quickly.”

  When I realized where he was putting the probe, I turned to Cayson. “Can you step out, please?” I would have to lift my gown up and I didn’t want him to see anything.

  “I’m not going anywhere.” Judging the stiffness of his body, he wasn’t going to budge.

  I turned my fiery gaze on him. “Cayson—”

  “I’m not leaving.” He held my gaze as he spoke, telling me he wouldn’t leave even if I threatened him with a gun.

  It was a lost cause. “Fine.”

  Cayson remained at my side and had his eyes glued on the doctor.

  “Here we go.” The doctor inserted the probe and stared at the screen as he moved it around. Several moments of silence passed as he checked everything. When he finally pulled the probe out, I was relieved it was gone. It was definitely uncomfortable.

  “What did you see?” Cayson asked.

  “Everything is fine,” the doctor said. “No bleeding.” He tossed his gloves in the garbage and made his notes. “You can pick up iron supplements at any grocery store. Make sure you take it daily.”

  “She will,” Cayson answered.

  The doctor walked out so I could change.

  I rounded on Cayson. “What the hell was that?”

  “What?”

  “I asked you to leave. We do this on my terms. If I don’t want you in the room, then you’re gone.”

  Cayson stared at me with the same look of irritation. “You think I’m going to leave you alone with a guy shoving a probe up your vagina? I don’t think so. You’ll have to get over it.” He headed to the door. “Now change so we can go.”

  ***

  “Everything went well with the doctor?” Trinity asked.

  “Yeah. I have low iron but that’s it.”

  “Well, there are worse things, right?” She sipped her wine then returned her focus to the magazine.

  “Definitely.”

  “Cayson went with you?”

  “He goes to everything with me.”

  “I’m sorry,” she jabbed.

  “Me too.”

  She shut the magazine and stared at me for almost a full minute. Her brain was working frantically behind her eyes. I knew she wanted to say something, and I had a feeling whatever it was wouldn’t make me laugh.

  “What?”

  “How long is this going to go on?”

  “Be more specific.”

  “This charade with Cayson. If you’re going to divorce him, get it started now. That doesn’t happen overnight. Get it done before the baby gets here. That way your child will never be confused.”

  The idea of really divorcing him broke my heart.

  “You can’t keep lying to everyone for long. And Cayson doesn’t deserve your protection. Leave him and tell everyone you had differences you couldn’t settle. And if people pry, tell them it’s none of their business.”

  The pain throbbed everywhere.

  “Skye?”

  “Hmm?” I was trying not to get emotional about this. I’d been postponing this as long as possible because it was just too hard. Could I really divorce the love of my life? Could I really leave him?

  “What’s the hold up?”

  “I just…it’s hard.” I blinked my eyes quickly so I wouldn’t cry.

  Trinity’s hard expression softened. “You still love him?”

  God, I was pathetic. “I’ll always love him, Trinity. Sometimes I forget what he did when it’s just him and I. When we’re getting ready for the baby it goes back to what it was before…and I want that. But then I remember what he did and it hurts all over again.”

  Trinity dropped her hostility. She listened with sad eyes. “I can’t even imagine how you must feel about this.”

  “I don’t know how I feel…”

  She took a deep breath before she spoke. “I’m not going to tell you what to do because this is your marriage and I hope I never have to experience the same thing, but…can you really be with a man you don’t trust?”

  “That’s the thing…I do trust him. I can’t picture Cayson doing that now he’s back home. I think it was just something that happened because he was in such harsh circumstances.”

  “And that makes it okay?”

  “Of course not,” I said quickly. “The hardest part about this entire thing is his lies. I know he did it. He knows he did it. I wish he would just admit it. If he did from the beginning…we might have moved on from it.”

  “I don’t know�
��”

  “I know Cayson is a good man despite all of that. I truly believe that.”

  “Or you’re just so blindly in love with him that you can’t think straight.”

  “Or that…”

  Trinity played with the magazine in her hands. “Whatever you decide, I’ll support you. You two are having a baby together. And you obviously still love each other. If you wanted to try again…I could understand it.”

  “You wouldn’t do it?”

  She shook her head. “If Slade cheated on me, that’d be the end.”

  “Good thing he never would.”

  She nodded. “I know. He’s a very devoted husband.”

  If only Cayson hadn’t fucked up I’d be just as happy as her right now.

  “So…are you going to give him another chance?”

  “I…I want him to tell me the truth. That’s what I want.”

  Trinity’s eyes lightened when she had an idea. “I know what you can do.”

  “What?”

  “Tell him you’ll give your marriage another chance if he fesses up. He has to tell you the entire truth and then you might start over. You can both get it out in the open and move on.”

  “Yeah…it’s an idea.”

  “Think about it. I honestly don’t think your marriage stands a chance unless he’s honest about what happened. That’s the bigger issue.”

  “I agree.”

  “So, I think you should go that route.”

  I nodded slowly. “I’ll think about it.”

  She opened the magazine again. “Together or apart, you know I love you and I have your back.”

  “I know, Trinity.” I gave her a weak smile.

  “I’ll stop being mean to him if you want.”

  I chuckled. “No, you can keep doing that. He needs to be punished in some way.”

  Chapter Four

  Conrad

  I wasn’t going anywhere. This was my home now. It was the first time I’d been to Italy and now I understood what all the fuss was about. It was a beautiful place full of history and magic.

  And the women were gorgeous.

  Francesca and Ana stuck to my side like glue, and they were perfect partners to explore paradise with. Every day was spent lounging by the pool, drinking, and fucking.

  Every morning I woke up in a sea of arms. Francesca particularly liked to cuddle so her body was always wrapped around mine. Ana liked to be close to me but she usually kept her hands to herself.