"Yes, but you need to be aware of something else too. I told the other guides I caught you in the office, since one of them was with me when I caught you, and he knows what you had done. They believe that you shared your plans for escape with me during the cleansing, which was my reason for spending extra time with you. It's a normal procedure, so no one was suspicious. But we have to be careful, Auren. This is dangerous for both of us. When we go to the kitchen to get your father's meal, you need to look suitably remorseful and subdued. Understand?"
"Yes." That wouldn't be too hard. I already felt remorse about betraying the Coalition, and my exhaustion would surely make me look subdued.
We were silent as we walked to the kitchen. Everyone was busy preparing the evening meal.
"Grab a bowl and fill it with porridge," Makari told me.
Though I knew his stern tone was for show, it still made me tremble. I lowered my gaze and quickly filled one of the bowls. I was anxious to leave and visit with my father. Thankfully, Makari didn't linger. He led me into another block, reserved for high profile prisoners, on the floor right below mine. He acknowledged the other guides with a nod, but didn’t stop to converse with them.
It meant I had no time to prepare myself, and I was suddenly nervous about seeing my father. What would I say to him?
"Your father is too weak to feed himself, so you’ll need to feed him," Makari whispered. "It gives us reason to linger a while, but we can't take too long without drawing attention, okay?"
I nodded without meeting his gaze, keeping up the pretense that I was dutifully accepting his instruction. As Makari pushed open the door and turned on a dim light, I peered around him to where my father lay. He was unmoving. For a moment, I wondered if he might be dead, and my heart skipped a beat. But then I saw the gentle rise and fall of his chest and realized he was sleeping.
"We’re here to deliver your evening meal, Zain," Makari announced.
My father turned at the sound of his voice and winced. At first, he appeared confused, but then recognition lit his expression. The moment he pushed himself into a seated position, I rushed to his side, placing the bowl of food on the floor between us. My vision blurred, emotion clutching at my chest as I struggled with words. My father wasted no time. He pulled me into his embrace, and I let go of my tears.
"Remember we don't have a lot of time, Auren," Makari said, kneeling beside me.
I nodded, pulling back reluctantly to gaze into my father’s tear streaked face. Still words failed me, so I filled the silence my lifting a spoonful of porridge to his mouth.
"I wish it was something better," I said.
My father grinned. "I could really go for a Hidalai steak right now."
"As soon as we're safe back on the Dark Isle, I'll make you one."
My father's grin faded, and he stroked the side of my face. "You look so much like your mother, and you have her spirit and courage too."
"I've missed you my whole life, and I've thought about you every day," I whispered. "I wanted to find you the moment I learned you were still alive."
"While I’m overjoyed to see you and to know you’re safe, I wish it wasn't here, Auren." His gaze became stern. "You’re in danger as long as you stay here."
I sighed, lowering the bowl into my lap. "It seems I'm in danger wherever I go. Maybe I'm safest where the enemy least expects me."
Zain smiled. "And you have your mother's wisdom as well. You can't imagine how proud I am of you."
"You shouldn't be. I've caused pain and suffering, and I betrayed the Coalition," I said, my voice thick with emotion.
Makari mumbled something behind me.
"Enough," my father answered in a stern tone. "I want no more talk of this. It is Drevin’s doing, not yours. And if anyone is responsible for Drevin's tyranny, it's me. I could have stopped this before it started."
He sounded so much like Kado it was easy to see how much influence Zain had on my foster father. For the first time in a long time, I felt hope take root.
My father gazed at Makari over my head. "Come,” he said, patting the ground. “Kneel here and face Auren. Take her hands."
Makari did as instructed. The instant our hands touched I felt the energy between us pulse.
"Let your minds meld as one."
As we did, my father's voice faded. The only thing that existed was Makari. A flood of emotion engulfed me, and it took a while to realize the emotions were his. The love in his heart was overwhelming, but there was something else too. Fear. Fear of what his father would do to him. Fear for me, mingled with a deep remorse for what he had done. I could see so clearly what drove him, why he had tortured me, and none of it had anything to do with self-preservation.
He feared what he felt for me, and what it meant. At first, he was determined to prove I wasn't the delohi-saqu, so he could be free to love me. When I saw the moment he began believing his father was right, the pain took my breath away. He was angry with everyone and angry and frustrated with himself for not being able to deny his feelings for me. He felt helpless, and that helplessness fed into his need for revenge. He couldn't take it out of his father, a man he had always hated and feared—mostly feared—so he took it out on me and the Coalition. He wanted to destroy everything that made his life a nightmare.
The horror he felt after discovering I wasn’t the delohi-saqu, and that I had been right all along, was like a blow to the gut. He believed he had to destroy me, and his belief was suffocating because he realized he couldn't live without me. I saw, then, he was determined to save me or die trying. If I died, so would he.
In the next moment, his thoughts became quiet until all I could feel was his love. It was a white-hot energy that filled me, burning into me. For a moment, it bordered on being painful, like he was cauterizing a wound in my spirit. The heat narrowed until it was focused only on my heart and then disappeared.
When I came back to myself I found I was in Makari's arms, crying. I had never felt such tremendous joy, and I never wanted it to stop. I want to go to that place, far from here, and stay there forever with Makari. I felt pressure on my hand and looked down to see it was my father. He held Makari's hand too.
"She's yours to take care of," Zain said.
Makari nodded solemnly, "I won’t allow her to be harmed again. I will protect her."
Chapter 2
"We have to go now, Auren. We've already been here too long," Makari said, releasing me gently.
I wrapped my arms around my father, reluctant to leave. It wasn’t enough time, not after all these years of waiting.
"He's right ageiyu, we will see each other again in the evening," my father said, giving me one final squeeze and kiss on the forehead.
I nodded, smiling as I recognized the word for beloved in the shadow language, and allowed Makari to pull me to my feet. It was hard not to hold his hand as we walked through the corridor, but I knew it would raise suspicion. It took great effort to appear dejected when all I wanted to do was smile and dance. Makari loved me, and he was on my side. I knew he would help me. He would help my father too.
It shocked me when we entered the cleansing room, and for a moment I was scared he might go through with it to keep up appearances. But his mind was open to me now. The thought never entered his head. As soon as the door closed, he locked it and led me to the middle of the room. Before we sat, he grabbed one of the shock wands.
"Just in case someone comes," he said, then took my hands in his.
We sat for a time, just looking at each other. Makari’s eyes were full of wonder as though he were seeing the sun for the first time.
"What?" I asked, feeling a little self-conscious.
"Don't you feel it?"
"Yeah, I do, but Makari—"
He squeezed my hands. "Wait. Before you say anything, Auren, I need to apologize. You have no idea how sorry I am for what I did to you."
"Actually, I do. I saw it in your mind." I smiled.
"I saw in yours too." His grin disapp
eared. "I should have seen it from the beginning."
I stroked his cheek. "It's done."
"No, don't dismiss it. My heart and my instincts were telling me my father was wrong, that I was wrong. Even though I was careful, I still could have killed you, Auren."
"But you didn't, and you know now. I have you as an ally, and we can escape. You can help me rescue my father so he can return to the shadow stalkers and make everything right again."
Makari frowned. "I'm not sure what I can do to help. What I'm doing is already dangerous for both of us. We can both leave now, and it's probably the better option, but to try to rescue your father too? The recinder prevents him from escaping through the shadow world, and the only way to remove it is with a special tool. There’s no way I can retrieve it without raising suspicion because it's kept in the palace under lock and key. My father holds the key.” He signed, a furrow marring his brow. “We would have to escape on foot, and I'm not sure you father is up to the journey. If we're caught, we'll be killed, or worse, we could be placed in recinders and tortured for the duration of our lives."
"Like my father." I reached out to his mind so he could feel my desperation. "I can't leave him here, Makari. I won't leave without him."
He rubbed a hand over his face. "Okay, I'll think of something. In the meantime, we have to keep up appearances. We have to be careful."
"I know." The last thing I wanted was for something to happen to Makari. It would devastate me if he were captured or killed because he was helping me.
*****
Since I was technically on my way to being fully cleansed, Makari had no excuse to spend every afternoon with me. He had no choice but to return me to my room after an hour in the cleansing room. As we walked the corridors, I tried my best to keep my head low and appear beaten. I worried I might be overdoing it, but Makari didn’t say anything, so I continued the charade.
When we reached my room, I was reluctant to let him go. I could sense something bothered him.
"I was scheduled for another cleansing," he said.
I gazed at him in alarm. It hadn’t occurred to me he would continue with his inhumane work. Not now he knew the truth.
"I can't refuse, or make excuses, Auren."
I shook my head. I didn't want to think about him torturing someone else.
Makari nudged me into my room and closed the door. "If anyone asks, I had to discipline you for refusing to do as instructed."
I nodded. "Makari, you can't do this."
"If I don't it, will look suspicious. I've already taken too many concessions with you."
I turned away, but Makari pulled me into his arms.
"I can't get out of it, but I can try to go easy on him. I'm there as a support guide, which means I stand guard unless he moves. Chances are he won't move, and I'll have nothing to do. Okay?"
I closed my eyes and nodded. Makari tipped my head back, rubbing his lips gently against mine. I melted in his arms. As much as I hated the thought of what he had to do, I also knew he was right. I could only hope he found a way out soon, so he never had to torture another innocent person again.
Chapter 3
The afternoon dragged in my cold, dark room—cell, it was still a cell—without Makari to keep me company. Although I could sense him in my mind, it didn't replace the physical contact or the sound of his voice. It struck me as odd that I hadn’t noticed the way it sounded before, so soft and hypnotic. It made me wonder if I was so lost in my feelings, I would be mesmerized no matter how he sounded.
I was relieved when Makari came to collect me for dinner. It meant not only did I get to spend time with him, but I would also see my father again. As we walked to the kitchen, I had to bite my lip to prevent the smile. All was quiet in the kitchen, which meant everyone else was eating in the dining room. It made things a little easier for me. I grabbed a bowl, filled it with the rancid smelling stew and began scoffing it down.
"Don't you want to sit down to eat that?" Makari asked, quietly.
I shook my head, continuing to shovel the foul tasting, lumpy liquid into my mouth. Not that I would have savored my meal anyway, but I was anxious to see my father. As soon as I finished, I placed my bowl in the tray and retrieved one for Zain.
"When I was searching the computer, I read there are other high-profile prisoners being held here?” I asked as we headed toward my father’s cell. “I know there were other shadow stalkers who disappeared from the shadow world.”
"There’s only one other here in Brynn, but there are two other reconciliation centers on Nadiria. The shadow stalker here is a young girl named Shai, I think."
I stopped walking as I felt the color drain from my face.
Makari gripped my arm and pulled me along. "We have to keep moving or we'll draw attention. You know her?"
"Shai is Kado's daughter. I won't leave without her either, Makari. I can't."
He nodded. "It might complicate things further. I'd rather get you to safety first and then worry about your father and Shai."
"I won't leave without them."
"You're very stubborn. You know that?"
I sighed. "Yes. Kado has mentioned that more times than I care to count."
Finally, we reached the door to my father's cell.
"You have fifteen minutes before I must return and take you for your ten minutes in the yard. Then I have to return you to your room. Since you’ve been caught sneaking around the building without supervision, you're bound to your room and not allowed out without an escort." He quirked an eyebrow.
"Imagine that," I said, winking before entering my father's cell.
My father was on the floor facing the back wall. He turned and pushed himself up as soon as I entered. He looked worse than he had that morning. As soon as Makari closed the door I sprinted to his side and knelt beside him, placing his food on the floor so I could hug him.
"You don't look well."
"I usually don't in the evenings, Auren. You'll get used to it."
"No, I won't. I'm going to get you out of here."
Zain sighed softly. "I do not wish to argue with you in the little time we have together, so let's talk about something else."
I didn't understand why we would argue about such a thing, but I nodded. Arguing with him was definitely not on my agenda. I wanted to get to know him. So, I picked up the bowl and started to feed him.
He held out his hand for the bowl. "I really don't need to be fed, Auren. I just allow them to believe I'm weaker than I am. It makes me seem less dangerous."
I smiled and passed him the food, glad to hear he was not as weak as he appeared.
"What would you like to talk about?" I asked.
"I'd like to hear about your childhood. Where did Kado take you after he left the Dark Isle?"
"I don't know exactly. He did say we traveled to various islands for the first few years of my life. At first, he intended to keep going, continuing to move so he could train me in secret. But I was very social back then, and he decided I needed to grow up around other children. So, he started working as a liaison to the shadow stalkers in the Coalition. To everyone else he was a courier. I didn't even know what he really did."
It was only then I remembered my surname. "He gave me the last name, Trask, because it's so common in the Serpent Isles, and enrolled me in school. During the school year I'd be like every other kid, except he threw odd lessons at me whenever he could. He wanted me to learn to chart stars, track and all this stuff I thought was crazy."
Zain chuckled and took another bite of his food. "Go on."
I smiled. It was good to hear my father's laughter. It occurred to me he must miss the Dark Isle and everyone he knew there. So, I decided to keep my story light in the hope of bringing back some memories for him. "Some of it was fun though. I didn't mind it too much, probably because it was the only time he paid much attention to me, well that and when I was in trouble for something."
"I imagine he was hard on you."
"He
was and wasn't. I used to sneak out a lot with my friends, and I'd always be in so much trouble when he caught me, and he always caught me. But I learned later he knew every time I was sneaking out, and he could have stopped me, but he didn't. Maybe a part of him wanted me to have fun."
"I'm sure it wasn't fun he had on his mind," my father said, taking the last bite of his food and setting the bowl down.
"What do you mean?"
"He was testing your abilities. I did the same with him. What better way to test a student's abilities than when they are trying to use them against you? Had you really fooled him, he may not have punished you even when he did find you missing."
My father winked, and I huffed. All that time I thought I was being clever, and I hadn't even been clever enough to avoid punishment.
"I'm sure he wanted you happy as well." My father said, placating me.
I shrugged. "We did have fun together. In the summer, we'd go camping. That's when I'd do my training, but it was like an adventure for me. We would go caving and rock climbing. He loved playing games with me, kind of like hide-and-seek, but I'd have to track him. It was a lot of work, but fun too. Those were the best times because it's when I felt closest to him."
"He opened the connection to you during those times."
I hadn't thought about that, but it made sense. "I didn't know about the connection until I was older, and even then, I knew very little."
"As it should be." Zain winked.
"He wasn't happy with the slow pace of my learning though. It worried him because he always knew the Galvadi would invade again. He just didn't know when. And at the end of each summer he'd erase my memories of being a shadow stalker, so I wouldn't endanger myself by accidentally telling my friends. So, I didn’t practice as much as I could have."
My father nodded. "He did the right thing."
I smiled. "He’s been questioning that for a while. It will relieve him to hear you say so."
"Then you should tell him when you return."
Shadow Stalker Part 2 (Episodes 7 - 12) Page 9
