The Way to Game the Walk of Shame

by Jenn P. Nguyen

  A grin stretched across my face. “Right, I guess we did.”

  Despite our big talk, Lauren and I weren’t dating. We did last summer, after she grabbed hold of me at the beach to introduce herself in the most exciting and memorable way possible. It was fun, but we broke up a month after that. Now we were friends who just hooked up once in a while.

  I usually made it a rule never to date or even sleep with the same girl twice. Somehow Lauren was the exception. She always had a way of getting under my skin. Or rather in my pants. Besides the awesome sex, she was pretty cool. She was different from the other girls I knew. I liked having her in my life. And this worked for us.

  “What are you doing here?”

  Instead of being deterred by my casual tone, she rolled over until she was squished against me, not even caring that the damp grass was probably making green smudges on the back of her jeans. For a girl who cared about her appearance, she didn’t think twice about sitting on wet grass. Hell, she’d go to school in a chicken suit if someone dared her to.

  Lauren pulled my arm away from my side and laid her head on top of my stomach. She laced her slim, cool hand around mine. “I wanted to apologize for leaving the party early. Paul wanted to take me out.”

  “Paul?”

  “You know Paul. That guy from the prep university I told you about?”

  Ah, right. I shrugged. “It’s cool. I found other people to hang out with.”

  “So I heard.” She didn’t say anything else, but I could tell something was bothering her. Lauren pressed my hand against her mouth. “You know, you could at least pretend that you’re jealous about Paul.”

  That’s weird. She never asked me about my girls, and I didn’t ask her about her guys. It was an unspoken rule between us. “Sorry, so how is the prep boy doing? Did he get his fraternity’s sigma tattooed on his ass yet?”

  Her lips curved into a smirk against my palm. “That’s better. And Paul’s fine. I’ll probably see him next week.”

  “Good to know that the tuition his parents paid for is being used wisely.”

  Lauren laughed, and the weight of her head disappeared as she leaned back on her elbows. She kept holding my hand, though. “So the funniest thing happened in class this morning.”

  “Oh yeah?” I played with her fingers, caressing her soft skin and smooth nails. “I’m surprised that you were actually paying attention in class.”

  Her grip on my hand tightened a bit. “Usually I don’t, but I wouldn’t miss the chance to see Taylor Simmons taken down a peg or two.”

  My hand froze. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, the princess didn’t have her homework to turn in for once.” Lauren giggled to herself. “You should have seen the anxiety on her face when Mr. Peters chewed her out. I could swear she was going to burst into tears or something.”

  With a frown, I let go of her hand and sat up. My arms crossed over my chest. “Uh, I don’t see why the thought of another girl crying would be so funny to you.”

  She slowly sat up, too. “Because she’s annoying. Everybody was glad to see her get yelled at for once.” The expression on her face was curious as she watched me. Her blue eyes narrowed a bit. “And why do you care? She’s just some random girl you screwed. You didn’t even know her before the party.”

  The corner of my mouth jerked into a half smile as I remembered the first time I actually spoke to Taylor. “Actually, that’s not true.”

  It was last summer, after Lauren and I had broken up. I was working part time as a lifeguard at the pool when I saw someone flopping around in the deep end. It took seconds for me to swim over and save her. After I carried her out of the water, Taylor spit up pool water in my face and scrambled away after mumbling thanks. I was shocked. No girl had ever treated me that way before. I saved dozens of people in the pool—mainly girls—but she was the only one I remembered from that summer. “Taylor’s not just a random girl. And to be honest, it’s kind of bitchy of you to consider her misery fun.”

  Lauren’s mouth dropped open. Even though everyone knew she was a bitch, this was the first time I had ever called her one. I felt kind of bad about it, but it was true.

  She brushed her hair over her shoulder and shrugged. “Whatever, forget I even said anything.” Wrapping her hand behind my neck, she pulled me toward her until her lips, her breath, was tickling my ear. “How about we get together tonight? My house? For old times’ sake.” There was smug smile on Lauren’s face. Her blue eyes seemed to be taunting me, urging me to just give in.

  I was tempted. Really tempted. Any other day and I wouldn’t have even waited for tonight. I would have buried my face in her hair, pulled her into the locker room and locked the door for the rest of the period. God, I hated to admit it, but my emotions were usually controlled by my dick. But not today. I wasn’t in the mood. “Sorry, as exciting as that sounds, sweetheart, I think I’ll pass.”

  She shoved me away and rose to her feet. “Fine. But don’t bother calling me the next time you want to hook up.” With a huff, she stalked toward the parking lot, nearly knocking over Aaron on the way.

  “Jeez, what’s her problem?”

  “You act like I ever know what she’s thinking.” I let out a sigh and fished my keys out of the pocket of my gym shorts. “Come on, Jill isn’t paying attention to us anyway. Let’s get out of here.”

  Aaron was still watching Lauren as she peeled away in her car. “Okay, where do you want to go?”

  “Anywhere but here.”

  4

  {Taylor}

  One day at a time. Until it all blew over and things got back to normal again. I repeated the same thought over and over in my head until I almost started to believe it.

  When the last bell rang for the day, I jumped out of my seat with joy. Now all I had to do was go home and crawl into my bed, and this nightmare day would be over.

  Just as I left my AP English class, some girl jostled my shoulder, making me fall back into the doorway. My books and binder smacked to the ground and flew open. Various articles for next week’s newspaper edition sprinkled the floor. I cursed under my breath and knelt to pick them up, wincing as my shoulder throbbed. I turned to stare at her, but she had already faded into the hallway crowd.

  “Seriously?” I muttered, stretching to reach my scattered books. My fingers had just closed around my blue binder when Todd Herbert, the unspoken leader of the pack of Neanderthals from lunch, smacked my butt.

  I jumped to my feet, but he just smirked and gave his buddies a high five. I narrowed my eyes at him.

  The reason people had never gossiped about me before was because I never gave them a reason to. I never did anything wrong. Unlike Carly, who never cared what people said or thought of her. Secretly, I envied that. I couldn’t be like that. I preened with pride when people complimented me, and my stomach turned when I got a dirty look. Dad said what people thought of me affected the outcome. Granted, he was talking about court cases and the jury, but it’s all basically the same. No matter what people said, appearances did matter.

  But I was sick of it. Evan was wrong. Things didn’t get better. My name was even scrawled on the toilet-stall door with Wite-Out, paired with the words WHORE + SLUT. I had waited until the bathroom was empty before attacking the door and breaking three nails in the process. And I was sick of everything. But most of all, I was sick of doing nothing. Screw appearances.

  “Hey, idiot!” Without thinking, I snatched my binder off the ground and threw it at Todd. It hit his shoulder with a loud, satisfying smack. Score! I fist-pumped the air in celebration just as he turned around with a scowl.

  Crap. Maybe I should have thought this through. I backed up a step when he stalked toward me, and—whoosh!—suddenly Carly flew in like my knight in a blue cardigan and jeans and shoved him aside with her shoulder. He stumbled backward against the lockers.

  She groaned and rubbed her right shoulder. “Damn, that hurt!”

  I grabbed her. “Carly! Are you
okay?”

  “Yeah.” She turned to Todd. “But I swear you’ll get a lot more than that if you bother either of us again.” She waved her hand for him to come forward. “Try me.”

  His nostrils flared, and he lurched toward us.

  With a yelp, I grabbed Carly’s shoulders to pull her back and out of his way when a tall back obstructed my view of Todd. A very familiar back that materialized out of nowhere.

  When did Brian get here? I peered up at him and poked the center of his broad back to make sure I wasn’t imagining things. He turned to look at me, and his frown deepened. His hand lightly touched my arm. “Are you okay?”

  I nodded. “I’m fine.”

  Carly cleared her throat. “I’m fine, too. Thanks for asking.”

  “I know you are. Nothing could bother you.” Brian gave her a quick grin and turned away. “You know, Herbert, picking on two girls kinda makes you look like a wimp.”

  Cursing under his breath, Todd took another step toward us just as Mr. Peters stepped out of his classroom. “What’s going on here?”

  The hall had been crowded during our fight, but everyone faded backward and practically evaporated as soon as a teacher showed up. Our group remained quiet. Even if we didn’t say anything, the evidence was pretty obvious. My books were still scattered on the ground. My binder was even at Todd’s feet, and Carly was still rubbing her shoulder.

  “Nothing, we just had a little accident, but everyone’s fine now,” Brian smoothly lied. He bent down to grab my books. “Nothing to worry about. Right, guys?”

  “Right, it’s nothing,” Carly chirped with a beaming grin.

  Todd’s eyes flickered between each of us—lingering on me for the longest time—before landing on Mr. Peters. After a long and agonizing minute, he shook his head. “Yeah, everything’s good.”

  Mr. Peters didn’t look like he believed us, but he nodded. “Then why don’t you guys go home? School’s over, you know. Ms. Simmons, can I talk to you again?”

  “Uh, I guess so.” I turned to Brian and Carly. “Do you guys want to wait for me?”

  Carly frowned. “I have to go to theater practice. But I’ll talk to you later.” She gave my arm a tight squeeze and turned to Brian. “Take care of her, okay?”

  “’Course. I’ll be here, Taylor.”

  With a nod, I let out a low, deep breath and followed Mr. Peters into his classroom. He sat down behind his desk, picked up a pen, and tapped it against the side of his desk. I shifted my weight side to side as I waited for him to speak.

  “First the late report and now this accident.”

  I ducked my head a little. “I know. I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.”

  “I hope not. But you’re clearly too distracted these days. I think you should take a break from preparing the Career Day presentation. Drop off your materials tomorrow, and I’ll have Lin take over.”

  And just like that, my dream of wowing the Columbia alumni—along with my chances of actually going to Columbia—faded away. “But—but you can’t. I’ve been working on this for ages! You can’t just give it to Lin. She’ll mess it up.”

  He dropped his pen with a clatter and meshed his hands together under his chin. “I’m just helping you out, Taylor. I know senior year is tough and you have a lot on your plate, but that’s life. Everyone has things to do. Obligations to fulfill. Families to feed. Bills to pay. This isn’t easy for me, either.”

  His words made me feel like an idiot. And I hated that feeling. But he couldn’t just take away my speech and give it to Lin Cheng. That girl had it out for me since we were in kindergarten. It wasn’t my fault I colored inside the lines quicker than her. Or that she was always in second place. Now third, since Brian had moved to town and kicked us both down a spot. But you didn’t see me being bitter about it all the time. Much.

  Wringing my hands together, I tried to look contrite. “I’m sorry about your obligations and your bills, but I can handle it! I swear!”

  “Then you’ll have nothing to worry about. This isn’t a punishment. Maybe later you and Lin can even work together on it. Help each other out.” He leaned back in his chair and nodded toward the door. “That’s it. You can leave now.”

  Yeah, right, she’d help me. More like help herself to all the credit and my hard work.

  I wanted to argue with him, but to my horror, his face got blurry. Damn it. Not now. Don’t cry. Maybe when I was safe at home in my soft gray sweater that fell past my knees, but I couldn’t cry here. Not in front of everyone.

  I don’t know how or when I left the class, but next thing I knew, Brian was standing in front of me, shielding me from the other people still lingering in the halls. Without saying anything, he wrapped an arm around my shoulders and led me into the library’s empty media room. I wanted to lean against his warm shoulder—god, I was so tired—but I kept my back stiff instead, determined not to show weakness. He shut the door and stood in front of it with crossed arms. I didn’t know if it was to prevent me from leaving or anyone else from coming in.

  I leaned against one of the bookcases and scratched at the fading blush polish on my nails. There was barely any trace left from the time my mom pulled me out of school for a mother-daughter manicure date. I was so annoyed afterward, because I’d missed the review session in calculus and ended up getting a B on the test. Especially since that was the first class that Brian had barely squeaked by with an A. If I had been at the review, I would have gotten an A+ and could have finally beaten him for once.

  Ironic, since I would kill to get out of school now. Bring on the pedicures. Hell, I’d even perm my hair like a poodle to get out of here.

  I let out a deep breath and rolled my tired shoulders before straightening up. “So thanks for, you know, before,” I finally said to Brian and reached for the stuff in his arms.

  “No problem.” He released my binder and the papers before shrugging. “Sorry if I’m being nosy and overstepping my boundaries, but what the hell are you doing, Taylor?”

  I glanced down at the folder of articles in my hands. “I’m going to organize some ideas I had for the next issue of New Voices. We should focus on the background people this time. Stage crew for plays, water boys in games. That sort of stuff.”

  “That’s a good idea, but that’s not what I’m talking about.” He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “I meant about all this Evan stuff.”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “You’re a horrible liar, Taylor.”

  Of course I knew what he was talking about. That’s what everybody was talking about. If only Brian would be intuitive enough to get the hint that I didn’t want to talk about it. For a smart guy, he could be really stupid sometimes.

  We’d only been friends for a little over a year, but it felt like a lifetime. Surprising, since I’d despised him from the start. Brian transferred to our school early last year. And within one semester, I was shoved down from number one in the class—a spot that I had all to myself for the past two years—to number two. And the most infuriating thing was that he didn’t even have to put any effort into being number one. He didn’t wake up early each day to study in the library or come to school with dark shadows under his eyes from cramming all night like I did.

  It was also pretty annoying that he was so darn likable to everyone. He did great in school and was average in sports. Good enough to have people invite him to games, but not good enough to be the star and have everyone hate him for being perfect.

  Even though I hated him for stealing my spot, I liked him. He understood and put up with me. And he was perfect for me. I always figured that we’d get together someday. It just made sense that we would. Preferably after we were settled in college and on our career paths.

  Brian wasn’t in-your-face gorgeous like, well, Evan, but he was handsome in his own way—tall and lanky with broad shoulders and straight black hair that pointed in all directions. The disheveled look contrasted with his crisp, well-f
itting clothes: He opted for dark dress jeans and button-down shirts rather than T-shirts and khaki cargo pants.

  From the neck down, he looked like a GQ model. From the neck up, he looked like he’d just rolled out of bed. Yet he made it work. I loved a well-dressed guy in a tie. Add in a vest, and I was putty on his shiny shoes. Carly always made fun of the fact that while other girls fantasized about football players and firemen, I’d swoon over a businessman in a suit. What can I say? I had mature taste. He also had dark, soulful eyes that made my knees weak, although his were black rather than gray like Evan’s.

  I squeezed my eyes closed, determined to shake the images away. Why couldn’t I get Evan out of my head? He wasn’t my type. T-shirts and holey jeans were his uniform.

  Although … I bet Evan would look smoking hot in a pair of dark-wash jeans and a casual pinstripe vest. Maybe paired with a dark-gray button-down shirt with rolled-up sleeves that perfectly match his stormy eyes and—thwack! I smacked my forehead with the palm of my hand. Why the hell was I dressing up Evan in my mind like he was my own personal Ken doll? Most girls would be doing the opposite.

  A hand snapped in front of my face, breaking my train of thought. Brian stared at me with a worried expression. I didn’t blame him. I didn’t know what was up with me today.

  I slumped down on top of the long table in the aisle, which usually held the projector. “You of all people should know not to believe rumors.”

  Both his eyebrows rose so high, they disappeared beneath the dark hair that fell across his forehead. “Yeah, everyone was really disappointed when I told them I didn’t know karate when I first transferred here. And that I wasn’t related to Jackie Chan. Still, somebody had to break that stereotype.” Something flashed across his face as he turned his head away. He was suddenly distant and a little cold. “So it really is just a rumor? You and Evan didn’t…”

  “No, we didn’t.”

  He let out a loud sigh of relief. A quick half smile appeared on his face. He coughed in his hand before shoving it in his back pocket. “I didn’t think so. I mean, he’s not even your type or anything. And you’re way smarter than that. I was just worried…” Brian shook his head and laughed. “Never mind. So what are you going to do about all the rumors, then?”