To Love a Texas Ranger

by Linda Broday

  “I’m so sorry.” Sierra touched his arm, wishing she could do more to comfort.

  “I promised Pete Walker as he died in my arms that I’d take care of Amy. At least she didn’t leave any children.” Sam brushed his eyes as though to wipe away memories. “She didn’t have anything other than a few personal effects, and the rangers laid her to rest next to Pete.” He slammed his hand against the porch railing. “I should’ve done more to keep my promise.”

  “I’m sure you did your best,” Sierra said. As though he wasn’t shaken enough finding out Luke was his brother, now Amy Walker’s death had brought even more guilt.

  “If you’re bothered that you have to put off finding Rocky, please don’t give it a thought. I understand. Do what you need to do.” She just prayed Rocky could last until help arrived.

  “This won’t affect my commitment to you, but thanks for understanding.” Sam turned and dropped heavily into a chair on the porch.

  The violence of Sam’s profession slammed into her. He was right. She saw what devastation law work brought. Lawmen died, leaving wives without husbands, children without fathers. And sometimes the kids were left orphaned.

  Her gaze swept over the man who held her heart. He lifted a guitar lying beside the chair and began to lightly strum. Music must soothe him.

  Dear God, if only she had something to soothe the jagged hurt inside her.

  Thirty

  As music swirled around her, Sierra’s thoughts returned to the night she’d danced with such reckless abandon. The night Sam had tried to warn her of the danger of falling for him.

  Her skin tingled with the sudden memory of his lips on hers, on her bare skin, her breasts.

  She watched his long fingers gently plucking the guitar strings. Those fingers, his hands, had skimmed over her body so capably, arousing such hunger and desire. But it was the depth of his heart that had sealed her fate. She’d seen how much he cared for his family and Luke, even though Luke was an outlaw. How torn he was over performing his job and duty to family.

  The only one he didn’t seem to care about was himself.

  Sam had selflessly given everything to others and kept nothing for himself, no reserve to fall back on. When those men had placed that rope around his throat, they’d left deep, scarred ruts in his soul. She could help heal him. He needed her, but he kept pushing her away.

  No use to keep trying. His mind was set.

  But so was hers. She lifted her chin.

  Sam’s gaze met hers, and his sorrowful smile showed a row of white teeth.

  Though she could tell her body what to do and make decisions about where to go, her heart was a different story.

  Her heart refused to listen.

  Sierra suddenly turned and went inside. She had to move out of the headquarters. To put distance between them.

  With Hector eating with Carlos and Sofia, she could talk uninterrupted. Following supper—from which Luke was absent—she caught Sam’s attention. “May I have a word?”

  He turned to Houston. “Give me a minute.”

  “I’m sorry,” she said as Sam pulled out her chair. “I don’t mean to take you from your brother. It’s just that this is important. It won’t take long.”

  Across the hall, Sam pointed to a small room that had a sofa and some chairs. “We can talk in here. Have a seat.”

  Instead, she stood, facing him. “I’m moving out.”

  He was silent for a long moment. Finally he spoke. “And go where? I can’t let you leave the safety of the ranch.”

  “If one’s available, for now I’ll move to a small house similar to the immigrants’. My needs are simple.”

  Sam studied her. “If you’re unhappy with your room, we can move you to another.”

  Sierra fidgeted under his gray stare. “It’s not that.”

  “Then I don’t understand.”

  How could she tell him he was too close and reminded her of everything she needed to forget? How did one go about telling a man she loved that living under the same roof was ripping her heart out?

  “It’s not the house or the room. I have to start making my own life, Sam.” She drew on the strength inside to make him see and not hurt him more. “We’ve been over this. I’m leaving the ranch as soon as I safely can. Hopefully, I’ll have Rocky, but if not, if he’s dead, I intend to return to Waco alone.”

  He strode to the window and looked out into the night.

  “It’s best this way,” she continued. “My mind is made up.”

  With his stiff back to her, he said, “I’ll see what I can find.”

  His cold tone pierced her. She swallowed hard. “Thank you. It’s nothing personal, Sam.”

  He turned and slowly moved to stand in front of her. “Isn’t it? At least be honest. You don’t want to be near me.”

  Sierra squared her shoulders and met his hard gray stare. His eyes burned with such intensity that she took a step back. She had hoped to avoid saying it, but he was going to force her.

  “You’re right. It’s too painful for me here.” She lowered her voice to a mere whisper. “I offered you my heart, the sole tally of everything I own. Only you gave it back. It wasn’t enough. I was never enough for you. I’m walking away, Sam.” While she still could. Make a clean break before they grew to hate each other.

  He flinched as though she’d struck him. Before he could answer, she turned and fled through the door and out into the night. She ran past Houston and down the steps of the porch.

  He called after her, “What’s wrong, Sierra? What has that brother of mine done now?”

  With a sob, she sought solace in the darkness behind the mercantile. She yearned to saddle a horse and ride out, far away from the Lone Star Ranch and the man who didn’t want her. Isaac Ford and his men were all that stopped her. They lurked out there, waiting for her to leave the safety of the ranch, but she wouldn’t risk capture again.

  Despite everything, she was still a coward.

  She was still the daughter William Hunt didn’t want. And now she was the woman Sam couldn’t love.

  * * *

  Silence deafened Sam as he stared at the open doorway Sierra had run through.

  The agony of her angry words echoed in the room. He released a string of cuss words, calling himself every name he could think of. Disgust rippled through him. She’d asked for nothing except for him to love her. Why couldn’t he tell her he did, ever since they’d kissed at the shack after the rainstorm?

  But she was wrong on two counts.

  He hadn’t given her heart back. He kept that in a very safe place.

  As for saying she wasn’t enough for him… Good God, she was everything he wanted and needed. If either of them could—should—change, it was he.

  Sam moved to go after her, but stopped. She wasn’t of a mind to listen to him now in the state she was in, even if he could find the words to say and get them out in time.

  Better wait. Meanwhile, he’d give her what she wanted. He’d give her space. The house the former schoolteacher had occupied was available.

  Even as he told himself he needed her close to keep her safe, he recognized the lie.

  Already his heart rebelled against not having her down the hall.

  Already the house felt cold and empty.

  Already he’d lost the most precious thing he had.

  With a sigh, he set down the glass before he threw it against the wall, and went to find Houston.

  Maybe the night air would cool him.

  His big brother turned at the sound of the door. “What’s wrong? Miss Sierra flew out like the devil was chasing her.”

  That description fit all too well. Sam took a chair and propped his leg on a nearby stool. “Wants to move out.” The words soured in his stomach worse than a big glass of buttermilk.

  “Why? Is s
omething wrong with her room?”

  “Nope. Me.”

  Houston chuckled. “Seems the lady shows uncommon good sense. Tell me why you wanted this powwow.”

  “It’s Luke.” Sam put Sierra aside in his mind and shared what he’d learned—about Luke’s account book listing all his robberies, about their brother’s dead wife, and his refusal—again—to claim the Legend name. “He wants to change, Houston.”

  “Kinda sounds that way. The list proves it.”

  Sam shoved his fingers through his hair. “If he was to pay everything back, he might get free of those robberies. The murder charge though…will take more doing. We’d have to find the person who really killed the judge.”

  “On the robberies, how much money do you estimate he took?” Houston shoved away from the porch rail.

  “Less than five hundred dollars. Something else was odd. In each robbery, the dates were exactly four months apart—starting three years ago.”

  Houston took a seat next to Sam. “He’s committing them for a very specific reason.”

  “When I asked him why he’d turned to crime, he told me he has his reasons, and he didn’t want to talk about it.”

  “I know Pa will give him the money to make restitution.”

  “I’m sure Pa would. But if Luke won’t take our name, he damn sure won’t take the money. On the other hand…he might if he worked for it.”

  “Hey, you might have something there. I’ll put his butt to work. Be happy to.”

  Sam scowled. “You’re a tad too eager. Wanting to test our new brother?”

  “Damn right. I want to know what he’s made of.”

  “I can tell you right now, Luke is one of the toughest men I’ve ever seen. He can take anything you throw at him and then some. When we were running, two steps ahead of Isaac Ford, I was proud to have him by my side. The man doesn’t quit. Not ever, not even with a bullet in his shoulder.” Sam was silent, then added low, “I owe him, Houston.”

  “Sure sounds like he has Stoker’s blood in him.”

  They had a clear view of Luke’s small house from the porch, and Sam saw the door swing open. Sam leaned forward as their father strolled out with his arm around Luke’s shoulders. Though Luke had a commanding height, he was still shorter than Stoker.

  It surprised Sam that his father hadn’t taken a bottle after supper and gone upstairs, as was his custom. Instead, he’d sought the company of his oldest son. Luke didn’t look all that happy.

  Houston murmured, “It appears they had that talk.”

  “Yep.” Sam softly plucked the guitar strings.

  “Probably giving Luke my job,” Houston said sourly.

  “Settle down. It’s reasonable for a father to want to know his son. Luke made himself ample clear. He spurns the ranch and us.”

  “Probably too damn civilized for him.”

  Sam muttered oaths to himself. Houston was determined to find fault, no matter what. Thinking he wasn’t at the top of the totem pole any longer seemed to have gotten under Houston’s skin. For almost thirty years, he’d known his place in the family. Now everything had turned upside down and crossways, starting with not being the oldest anymore, undercut by three months.

  Houston’s words—that Stoker simply tolerated him—again drifted across Sam’s mind. How long had Houston felt second to him? Now his brother saw himself slipping another notch to third. “Stop it, Houston. Listen to yourself. No one’s trying to take your place. Not me, and damn sure not Luke. You’re Pa’s right-hand man. He depends on you. You and he have the deepest bond of all.”

  “I guess.”

  “He’s turned over the Lone Star to you to run. He’s not blind. He knows how capable you are. He trusts you.”

  “All that can change in a heartbeat.”

  “Damn, Houston, I feel like I’m talking to a boy in knee pants. Nothing’s going to change. You’re the only one who knows everything about this ranch. You know stuff Pa doesn’t, because you’re out there every single day.”

  “True.”

  “And you keep him from gambling away more of the land.”

  They watched Luke go back inside, and their father stride toward them. As always, Sam was struck by the sheer power of the man. Anyone who thought it easy to whip him had better think again. The sudden memory of Stoker Legend once fighting a mountain lion to protect him swam across his mind. Caught without a weapon, his Pa used his bare hands to rip open the beast’s throat. The incident left quite an impression on a nine-year-old boy. Though he’d seen his fiftieth birthday, he hadn’t lost a bit of muscle or mental toughness.

  “Nice night.” Stoker strode up the steps and sat down next to Houston. He didn’t appear to have taken one drink of liquor. “Your mother always loved sitting out here after supper.”

  “I remember,” Houston said. “She’d sit out here for hours, doing nothing but looking out over the land.”

  Stoker nodded. “The air feels good. Nothing like it to clear your head.”

  “Did you get things settled with Luke?” Sam asked.

  “Broke the ice is all. I didn’t think anyone could be more stubborn than you are, Sam. Luke is hell-bent not to take anything from me. Refuses to even stay over here in the house.”

  “Give him some time. He’ll come around. This is new for all of us.” Sam lightly strummed his guitar.

  Stoker sighed. “He feels like an outsider.”

  “I’m sure,” Houston said. “The three of us have a history with each other. Luke has nothing, not even one memory to help him relate to us. Sam’s right. Give him some space.”

  “That’s just it. He wants to leave. I told him I wouldn’t hold him here. That I’d help him if he’ll stay.” Stoker fixed Sam with a warning stare. “You arrest him, and you’ll go over me. I know he broke the law, I know he’s a wanted man with a price on his head, and I know all about your job. But you’re on Lone Star land, son. I’m in charge here.”

  Hell, Sam thought, isn’t that the way it has always been?

  Sam bit back rising anger. “We’re on the same side, Pa.”

  “On this land, you’re all equal.” Stoker rose. “Luke carries deep scars. Some are what I unwittingly put there. Thinking his father didn’t want him, wouldn’t claim him, dammed up something inside Luke. It’ll take time and patience to heal.”

  “That it will,” Houston agreed, then told him what Sam had learned during his talk with Luke.

  Some of the worry left Stoker’s face. “Get me that list, and I’ll pay back every cent to those people. That’s easy to fix.”

  “It doesn’t smooth over the murder charge, Pa,” Sam reminded him. “And what good will paying back this money do if Luke keeps right on robbing? I told him that if I stick my neck out, he has to stop. He doesn’t know if he can.”

  “Hell, this is a fine mess. I’ll need to have another talk with him. Good night, boys.”

  After their pa went inside, Sam sat in silence, listening to the distant bawling of a calf probably looking for his mother, and the clank of the heavy chains securing the huge bronze star. A glance at the star revealed moonlight shining through the cutouts in each point. The shadow on the ground was eerily beautiful.

  Sam thought of the legend of the ranch he’d always heard. The man who sleeps under the star will learn his true worth. Somehow, he’d always thought it meant sleeping on the ranch. But maybe it wasn’t that at all.

  “Houston, have you ever slept under that star?”

  “Nope. Why in the hell would I want to?”

  “The legend.”

  Houston laughed. “Someone made that up to tell around the campfire. We sleep under the Lone Star every night.”

  “What if it’s talking about under the hanging star?”

  “Go ahead, but I’m sleeping in a bed.”

  “Maybe I wil
l before I ride out.”

  “It’ll probably fall on you.” Houston chuckled, then sobered. “Sam, you already know you’re the best lawman in the state. Don’t let Pa mess with your head.”

  “It’s always a battle when I come home. I wanted this time to be different. I thought he might have mellowed a tad.”

  “Nope. Hell hasn’t quite frozen over yet.”

  Sam laid down his guitar. “We’ve got trouble of another sort to discuss.”

  He told Houston about Ford and his men riding up to the crossbar. “They’re biding their time. Sooner or later, they’ll find a way in. They’re like a bunch of rats, always gnawing, searching for the smallest opening. Sierra is terrified. I hurt her real bad, Houston. I’m afraid she’s going to saddle up and ride out some night after we all go to bed.”

  “Damn! She might. And if she does, I know your shirttail won’t hit your backside before you go after her.”

  “You know me well, brother.”

  “Because we’re two of a kind, and that’s what I’d do. She means a lot to you.”

  “More than anyone knows, even her.”

  “Then you’d better do something fast,” Houston warned.

  Sierra was wrong. She was more than enough for him. Even if he could never become settled enough for her or as much as he knew he should, he didn’t have it in him to let her go.

  He couldn’t.

  Thirty-one

  Sam stood at his bedroom window, watching dawn break the following morning. The Texas flag fluttering proudly in the air was a welcome sight and, though not enough, brought a bit of peace to his ragged soul.

  He hadn’t slept a wink. Too much thinking to do. He’d gone looking for Sierra last night after everyone turned in and had found her at the corral, watching the horses. He’d stood in the shadows a good bit. After a while, he’d finally approached and quietly suggested she return to the house. She’d jerked away from his touch and silently did as he asked.

  And then he’d discovered that Luke was gone. Sam had waited in the darkness and seen his brother ride in again about three a.m.

  Now in the early morning, his attention caught on another sight that brought an ache to his chest. Pink light from the rosy dawn brushed Sierra’s face as she slipped from the house for her first day teaching school. It was awfully early. She was either anxious to get a look at the small school…or else trying to avoid Sam. He’d bet on the latter.