The Curse of the Boyfriend Sweater
Page 17
Second Sock Syndrome
1. There’s a method that involves one long circular needle called, fittingly, the Magic Loop; there’s also a way to knit two socks at a time, which solves this whole problem in one go. But I’ve never really mastered either technique, the same way I’ve never really learned how to hold the yarn, and sort of enjoy the masochistic struggle.
Fiberspace
1. Early on I interviewed a woman for a story I was writing, and at the end she asked if I worked for a shoe website. “Excuse me?” I said. “You know,” she replied, “Buzz-Feet.”
2. Sweater-pants, which is when you turn a wacky old sweater into a pair of pants. It’s the brainchild of a knitwear designer named Steven West and everyone should own some.
3. Non-crafters are always floored by how much yarn can cost. There’s a range, as with most things in this delightful late-capitalist society, but if I’m going to make a sweater I know that I’ll most likely spend at bare minimum $60. And some of my favorite yarns will run me twice that. There are times when I feel guilty about spending so much, but then I remind myself that I’ve always been too nervous a person to really enjoy smoking weed, etc., so I save a lot of money that I might otherwise spend on, like, drugs. Yarn is drugs.
Homemaking
1. In their defense, “morning” is kind of a strong word—my grandparents’ house had that particular back-home magic that causes you to sleep until noon long after you’ve aged out of that sluggish habit.
2. Klezmer is like jazzy Jewish folk music, and her primary band is called—honest to God—Too Klez for Comfort.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
The greatest thanks my yarn-loving heart can muster go to Kate McKean, an incomparable agent and sounding board and knitting buddy and friend.
To Amy Einhorn, whose belief in this project and whose guidance, patience, edits, and general brilliance shaped it into something so much more than the swirling threads of thoughts in my own brain; and to Conor Mintzer, Caroline Bleeke, Kimberly Escobar, Molly Fonseca, and the whole Flatiron team who helped get it out into the world.
To my earliest readers and editors, who made me feel like this was something worthwhile even when I didn’t know what it would or could look like: Anne Speyer, Liz Kossnar, Arianna Rebolini, Katie Heaney, Rachel Sanders, Rachel Miller, Jen Doll, Doree Shafrir, Mark Schoofs, and Isaac Fitzgerald; and to my old BuzzFeed family and my new Racked one.
To the Millettes, who so generously opened their home to me, where I wrote more words, drank more coffee, and knitted more socks than pretty much the rest of my life combined.
To Leela, Chris, and Violet, who have been the greatest “landfamily” a transplant New Yorker could ever hope for.
To Amitava Kumar and Dean Crawford, who I will probably be hounding for advice and recommendation letters long after the Vassar school song has faded from my memory.
To the Night Owls and the Young New Yorkers’ Chorus, who helped me find my voice; and to the Charles River Creative Arts Program, the first place where I learned the value of making things; and to the Thread, which has always felt like home.
To my family, the reason for it all.
And to Aude White, whose friendship sustains me and makes me better, and to Brendan Klinkenberg, the best wearer of sweaters I know.
Recommend The Curse of the Boyfriend Sweater
for your next book club!
Reading Group Guide available at
www.readinggroupgold.com
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Alanna Okun is a writer, editor, and crafter. She is currently a senior editor at Racked, and has written for publications such as BuzzFeed, Brooklyn Magazine, Apartment Therapy, and The Hairpin, and has appeared on Today, Good Morning America, NPR, and many other local and national television and radio programs. Alanna lives in Brooklyn with a lot of yarn. You can sign up for email updates here.
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CONTENTS
Title Page
Copyright Notice
Dedication
Casting On
First Rows
Not Just for Grandmas
Missed Connections
The Curse of the Boyfriend Sweater
Frogging, or How to Start Over
The Best Places to Knit, Ranked
Moving the Needle
Okay, So Here Is Why Summer Is the Best Time for Knitting
Learning Curves
Sixish
Things I Do Wrong, at Least as Far as Crafting Is Concerned
Knitting Myself Back Together
Things I Am Better at Because of Crafting
Body Talk
Words They Need to Invent for Crafters
Second Sock Syndrome
Things I’ve Used Knitting Needles for Besides Knitting
Bad Habits
An Open Letter to Crochet
Fiberspace
Tools of the Trade
Small, Surprising Things That Remind Me of the Feeling of Crafting
Homemaking
Pieces
The Weather Was Better Before You Woke Up
Casting Off
Notes
Acknowledgments
About the Author
Copyright
THE CURSE OF THE BOYFRIEND SWEATER. Copyright © 2018 by Alanna Okun. All rights reserved. For information, address Flatiron Books, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010.
www.flatironbooks.com
Cover design by Kelly Gatesman
Excerpts from “First Rows” and “Knitting Myself Back Together” originally appeared on BuzzFeed.com. Reprinted with permission.
An excerpt from “Homemaking” originally appeared on NPR’s Selected Shorts.
THE LIBRARY OF CONGRESS HAS CATALOGUED THE PRINT EDITION AS FOLLOWS:
Names: Okun, Alanna, author.
Title: The curse of the boyfriend sweater: essays on crafting / Alanna Okun.
Description: First edition. | New York: Flatiron Books, 2018.
Identifiers: LCCN 2017045150 | ISBN 9781250095619 (hardcover) | ISBN 9781250095626 (ebook)
Subjects: LCSH: Knitting—Anecdotes. | Knitting—Psychological aspects. | Okun, Alanna—Friends and associates. | Knitters (Persons)—United States.
Classification: LCC TT820 .O367 2018 | DDC 746.43/2—dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017045150
eISBN 9781250095626
Our ebooks may be purchased in bulk for promotional, educational, or business use. Please contact the Macmillan Corporate and Premium Sales Department at 1-800-221-7945, extension 5442, or by email at MacmillanSpecialMarkets@macmillan.com.
First Edition: March 2018