Fighting for Desire

by Sarah Bale

  She glanced up and smiled. “Who would have ever thought you would own your own jet one day.”

  He sat across from her. “No one in Tyler, that’s for sure.”

  She looked back down and didn’t say anything. He leaned over the aisle to see what she was drawing. His mouth dropped open when he saw himself staring back.

  “I know it’s not very good,” she said as she closed the notebook.

  He shook his head and took the tablet from her hand.

  “I’ve always thought you had a talent for drawing, you know that.”

  He flipped through her sketches, slowly looking them over. Some were of people he didn’t know and a few were of her dog. Then he saw his face again. And again. His eyes lifted and she blushed.

  “May I have one of these?”

  She grabbed the notebook, snatching it from his hands. “You don’t have to ask for one just to be nice.”

  “I’m not asking just to be nice. I really want one.”

  Her internal debate was etched clearly on her face and his pride stung a little.

  Finally she said, “I will give you one when we get back to Miami.”

  He smiled. “I appreciate it. Why did you sit back here by yourself?”

  He surprised himself by asking. Walking away from her in one month was going to be harder than he anticipated, if he actually cared for her. His face hardened at the thought.

  “Never mind. I’m going to get a drink.”

  Shannon watched in confusion as Dev walked to the front of the plane to the wet bar. He poured some liquor into a glass and then shot it back in one gulp. He held the bottle in one hand and the glass in the other as he went back to his seat near Marco.

  She sighed and put her notebook back inside her purse. She pulled out her cell phone and saw she had a text from Joe. He hadn’t answered her calls but had just checked in with her via messenger. She texted him back.

  Where are you right now? She asked him.

  A Motel 6 near the YMCA. He texted back.

  She knew without asking that they held the AA meetings at the YMCA.

  I’m out of town for a few days but call if you need anything. I’m keeping you in my prayers, Joe.

  She put her phone away before one of the flight attendants yelled at her. Hmm. Would they say anything about using a cell phone on a private jet? Probably not but she didn’t want to risk it.

  Marco laughed at something Dev said and she tried not to let it bother her. He would never be completely relaxed with her again and she was still trying to accept her new fate. Another bout of laughter caused her to stand and walk toward them before she could stop herself.

  They both glanced up as she sat next to Dev.

  “Would you like something to drink, Shannon?” Marco asked as he held up an unopened beer.

  She shook her head, trying to hold back a look of disgust. “I’m fine, thank you. It was just lonely in the back.”

  He smiled at her. “Dev was just telling me about a fight he got into in high school.”

  “Oh? Which one?”

  Dev flashed his beautiful half-smile. “Are you suggesting I fought a lot?” He laughed at his own joke and went on. “I was telling him about the time I took out half of the football team.”

  She grinned too as she remembered. They had been giving him a hard time about where he lived and then the quarterback threw an empty soda can at him. She tried to hold him back but ended up holding his backpack as he shook it loose from his arms.

  “I stood there, holding his bag like a shield,” she said with a chuckle. “I was prepared to use it if anyone took a low blow at him.”

  Marco whistled. “Damn. You never mentioned she was a scrapper too.”

  Dev’s eyes met hers and he grinned. “Shannon wasn’t a fighter but she was a fierce protector in her own way. She kept me out of more trouble than I can even remember.”

  She shrugged. “Someone had to make sure you didn’t end up in jail. I’m pretty sure the judge had a cell with your name on it.”

  There was more truth to that statement than she would ever admit to him. Her father had played a big role in the judge’s dislike of Dev. They were golf buddies and both considered it an insult that she was dating “beneath” her status. She snorted softly.

  “Yeah, I wonder what happened to old Judge Shock,” Dev mused and took a drink.

  A whiff of the alcohol reached her nose and she recognized the woody smell as whiskey.

  Her nose crinkled. “Last I heard he was still there, older than dirt and making the lives of unruly teens hell.”

  Dev laughed and she smiled up at him.

  “I should thank him one of these days,” he admitted. “If he hadn’t been such a hard ass, I probably would have ended up on the streets.”

  She groaned dramatically. “Don’t thank him. The rest of the town would never live it down if the mighty Devlin James thanked Judge Shock.”

  Marco laughed. “Do people in your hometown keep up with Dev’s fighting career?”

  “They do. I believe there’s even a group of people who get together and watch his fights at the bar.”

  Dev raised an eyebrow. “I thought you hadn’t been back in years. How do you know all this?”

  Her face flushed. “I do still have family there. Not all of us leave our hometown behind and never look back.”

  Marco jumped in and asked, “How has the town responded to the scholarship we set up in Dev’s name?”

  “The reaction has been wonderful! My aunt Laura says the kids who qualify for it are so very thankful.”

  The scholarship funded by Dev allowed one male and one female student to attend college for free. The applicants had to come from low-income families and were usually single-parent homes as well. The first year it was in place there were only five applicants. Now, in its fifth year, there were about fifty applicants.

  Dev seemed embarrassed. “I’m only doing what I wished could have happened for me.”

  “It’s also good publicity.” Marco turned to Shannon. “I’ve tried to get him to go back and hand out the scholarship himself but he won’t do it.”

  She could feel the tension coming from Dev’s body. “Well I can’t say anything about not going back. I’ve stayed away on purpose too.”

  “See,” Dev said with a smug grin. “It’s not just me.”

  Marco sighed. “It would just look so much better,” he said, holding up his hands, “but I’m not going to force the issue.”

  “What other charity work are you involved in?”

  “I do some work with Habitat for Humanity and I volunteer at the local food bank.”

  “Just in Florida?” At his confused look she went on. “Mrs. Ingram mentioned you own several properties.”

  “I try to volunteer at the food bank of whatever city I’m in. Sometimes I’m too busy and just send in a cash donation.”

  “That’s really great, Dev.”

  His eyes turned hard for a moment. “Yeah, well no kid should ever have to wonder where their next meal is coming from.”

  Had he really been hungry as a kid? He had often swiped her roll from her lunch tray but she thought he only did that because he was an average boy, always wanting more. Before she could say anything Marco changed the subject.

  “I was able to score tickets for that new acrobat show you wanted to see. You’ll be in the front row.”

  Shannon had heard about the various acts. “Is that the water-themed show?”

  Dev grinned wolfishly at her. “Nope. It’s the one based on seduction and pleasure.”

  Her face flamed and she looked away.

  Marco cleared his throat. “Well anyway… I’m sure you two will have a good time. I also found out we are invited to the boxing commissioner’s private party the night before the fight.”

  “Boxing commissioner?” Shannon asked.

  Dev explained. “Each state has a commissioner in charge of any hand-to-hand sporting event. They regulate the sanct
ioned rules. Most of the time they are referred to as boxing commissioners.”

  “I see. What type of rules do they enforce?”

  “The usual. Making sure the fights are clean—meaning no one’s got any hidden weapons, like razors. They make sure each fighter’s wearing the proper gear. Things like that.”

  “Wow,” she said. “I had no idea it was possible for people to sneak weapons into the ring.”

  Dev’s forehead scrunched up. “It’s illegal but it happens in some of the smaller organizations.”

  She thought about Johnny’s threat and rubbed her arms, trying to get rid of the chill she felt.

  “Do you want me to grab a blanket?” Dev asked, apparently noticing her shiver of apprehension.

  She shook her head. “No, I’m fine.”

  Now more than ever she knew she had to protect Dev, no matter what it took. Even if doing so meant betraying him again.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Dev glanced over at Shannon, who slept sitting up, her head propped against the window. She looked uncomfortable as hell.

  “How much longer until we land?”

  Marco glanced at his watch. “Another hour.”

  Dev stood and scooped Shannon into his arms. She stirred slightly but didn’t wake up. He carried her to the back of the plane to the bedroom.

  He bought the jet used, and the former owner, a famous British singer, had turned the back room into a recording studio. He had no use for it and had it completely gutted.

  In its place he’d had them build a bedroom fit for royalty. He’d gone all out—from hardwood floors to a large bed, custom designed to fit the space. The ceiling even boasted stamped copper. Gently he laid Shannon on top of the covers.

  Again he noticed that even in her sleep she still looked tired and stressed. He wondered if she ever let her guard down.

  “What happened to you?” he asked her sleeping form. “What changed in your life? You had everything and now you just seem…lost.” He sighed. “I used to envy you and the life you were meant to have. I thought that if I could keep you, I might have the same chance at a good life.”

  A bitter laugh left his lips. “I was wrong. In the end I didn’t need anyone to make a good life for myself. I only needed me.” Several memories stirred in his mind but he pushed them away. “In the end I was the only one I could count on. You weren’t even there for me.”

  He ran his hand through his hair. As much as he hated to admit it, he did care about her and he wanted to know what happened to put her in the position she was in now. He shook his head. If he was going to get answers, he would need Marco’s help.

  Shannon kept her eyes shut as Dev talked to her. This was the most real he had been with her and he was only acting that way because he thought she was asleep. She bit the inside of her cheek, trying to hold back her tears.

  The door shut and she peered through her lashes to see if he was gone. Blessedly he was. She rolled over and pressed her head into the pillow. There had to be something she could do to regain his trust, even if she didn’t deserve it.

  He would never forgive her for what he thought she did.

  “In the end I was the only one I could count on. You weren’t even there for me.”

  “Oh Dev,” she whispered to the empty room. “You don’t know how wrong you are. I was always there for you. You just didn’t know it.”

  * * * * *

  Someone shook her gently. Shannon mumbled a curse and opened one eye. Marco stood in front of her with his hands up, as if in surrender.

  “Sorry. Dev wanted me to wake you. We just landed and are taxiing right now.”

  She sat up, trying to straighten her hair. A useless effort—her curls had minds of their own. “It’s okay. I can’t believe I was asleep.”

  He smiled at her. “You’ve been out for a while. Dev carried you in here so you could be more comfortable.”

  He started to leave but she stopped him.

  “Do you mind if I ask you a question?”

  He lifted his shoulder in a shrug so she went on.

  “Has Dev ever mentioned our…past?”

  Marco glanced over his shoulder and then replied, “He is my best friend. What do you think?”

  She chose to ignore the snide undertone. “Has his investigator looked into my past?”

  “Are you trying to figure out what all Dev knows about you? Because he knows everything. The PI gave us an entire file on you. So don’t think you can try to hide anything or try to blackmail him.”

  Oh, she doubted Dev knew everything about her past. If he did, she wouldn’t be standing on his private jet talking to his trainer and best friend. She would still be working two jobs, trying to survive.

  She held up her hands in defense. “Calm down. I was just wondering if I could see the file.”

  Marco’s eyebrows shot up. “Then you need to talk to Dev.”

  She decided before falling asleep that she wanted to know what he knew about her. They would never be able to move on if he had something to hold over her head.

  “I will ask him then,” she retorted.

  Without waiting to see if Marco was following or even going to reply, she walked away. Dev sat in the same seat as before and glanced up from his book as she approached.

  He put the book aside. “What’s wrong?”

  He had always been able to read her emotions, which were usually plastered across her face.

  She calmed herself before saying, “I want to see the investigator’s report on me.”

  A muscle ticked in his jaw. “Why?”

  “Because I deserve to know what you know about me.”

  “You lived it. Shouldn’t you already know what’s on the report? Or is there something in particular you are afraid I know about?”

  Oh boy. He was pretty darn close on the last one.

  She shrugged. “I want to know what you know. Plain and simple.”

  He stared at her without blinking. Finally he said, “Give me a day or so. I will have it sent over.”

  “Thank you, Dev.”

  He stood. “Don’t thank me, Shannon. This changes nothing. At the end of the month we’re through.”

  He walked to the front of the plane, where the door now stood open. Ducking his head, he disappeared outside. Marco followed right behind him and shot her a look that told her exactly how he felt. He was merely tolerating her.

  She sighed and grabbed her purse. Once she knew what was on the report she would know how to move forward. Now her goal was to keep Dev safe.

  Dev stared out the window of the limo, purposely ignoring both Marco and Shannon. He wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone. Not with his temper on the edge of snapping.

  The Vegas strip flashed by in a blur. As they passed the front of MGM Grand he saw his face on a large digital billboard, advertising his fight. He was surprised to see his opponent’s face wasn’t displayed as well.

  “MGM Grand felt your face would sell seats,” Marco said, as if he’d read Dev’s mind. “Arizona isn’t considered a pretty boy.”

  Dev huffed. Pretty boy? Yeah, he had been lucky and hadn’t taken too many hits to the face but he didn’t consider himself “pretty”. His overall appearance was part of the marketing bullshit that his team loved so much. He wanted to be respected as a fighter not a cover model.

  “Who is Arizona?” Shannon asked with a tilt of her head.

  “My opponent. I don’t call the guys I fight by their names,” he replied. “Ever.”

  “Why?”

  “It makes it personal when I use their names…gives them power. I like to keep it simple and refer to them by the name of their home state. That way when the fight is over, I move on to the next state.”

  He knew the explanation sounded strange but he learned years ago the power of a name. A name could hold you back and even break you. Hell, his name had caused a few doors to close. Recently it had felt as if the doors were starting to shut more and more.

  Shannon�
��s eyes clouded over. “I understand what you mean. No one deserves to hold power over anyone.”

  She sounded as if she was speaking from personal experiences but he couldn’t be sure. From what he remembered she never had to worry about her name hurting her.

  Marco cleared his throat. “Not to change the subject but when we get to the hotel they are going to want to take a few photos of you and Shannon.”

  “Why do they want to take a photo of me?”

  Marco sighed. “I’m guessing you forgot to tell her the plan?”

  Shit. He had meant to tell her about the high-school sweetheart plan but had been distracted by other things. Mainly her outfit the night before.

  “Plan?” Shannon looked back and forth between Dev and Marco.

  “Uh, yeah. I meant to tell you… Marco thinks it will look good in front of the press if we act as if we are sweethearts who have been reunited. The paparazzi can be harsh and we don’t want them to find out about your past.”

  “My past? Do you mean that I worked in a shady club or that I have a large amount of debt? Or could it be that I aborted Dev’s child when I was eighteen?”

  Dev whipped his head around to look at her and was shocked to find a stone-cold expression on her face.

  Her gaze landed on him and she said, “If you were so fucking worried about your image, then you should have picked a different ex. I’m sure there are plenty to choose from.” She took in a deep breath. “And don’t worry about my past. I can handle myself. I have for eight years.”

  The limo pulled into VIP lane of the MGM Grand and she grabbed her purse.

  “What are you doing?” Marco asked.

  She rolled her eyes. “I’m getting out before anyone has a chance to take a picture of me. If you need me, I will either be at the pool or at the bar.”

  The limo wasn’t fully stopped when she opened the door and hopped out. Dev watched as she darted past a group of Asian tourists and disappeared through the doors of the casino.

  “Damn,” Marco said. “She has more of a temper than you let on.”

  “It’s my fault. I should have prepared her.”

  “I don’t think anyone saw her getting out of the limo. Hopefully she calms down before tonight and then we can set up a scheduled photo session before you go out.”