Fighting for Desire

by Sarah Bale

  “The police?” Her chest tightened with fear and she felt as if she was going to be sick. “Dev, what’s going on?”

  He took her upstairs to the room they shared and closed the door. She sat weakly on the bed and he stood in front of her with his arms crossed.

  “I had an interesting talk with a friend of yours while you were gone.”

  “Dev, I wasn’t gone. I was tricked into thinking that man was a detective!”

  “I’ll admit that part was shady but when your friend told me why he had to trick me I understood.”

  “He? Who are you talking about?”

  Her heart pounded. Johnny had gotten to him.

  Dev began to pace back and forth. “What I find so…humorous is that you failed to mention you already knew this man. I thought when we were introduced to him in Vegas we were both meeting him for the first time.”

  Shit. The time to stop running had finally come. She needed to tell him everything. She took in a deep breath and squared her shoulders.

  “I can explain…”

  He cut her off with a sneer. “As if I would believe you!”

  “Dev…” she tried again.

  “No! You don’t get to talk right now! Right now you need to listen.” He ran his hands through his hair. “Fuck, Shannon. What I don’t understand is how you could do this to me!”

  She stood, her body shaking in anger. “Fuck you, Dev. I’m tired of letting you treat me this way. I haven’t done anything to you. I’ve been trying to save you and your arrogant ass! And every time I tried to tell you, you cut me off.”

  Had Johnny truly told him everything? The anguished look in Dev’s eyes made her believe so.

  “Why did you do it? Why did you lie to me?” He laughed bitterly. “You know, I didn’t believe the PI report on you at first but then I talked to Johnny and he backs up everything. You are nothing more than a gold-digging whore, Shannon, and I can’t believe I played right into your little game!”

  She gasped, feeling as if she’d been slapped. “What are you talking about? What did Johnny say to you?”

  She needed to know what that asshole had said because Dev wasn’t making sense.

  His eyes narrowed in on her until she felt like squirming. “He told me about the drugs, Shannon. He said you stole from him too, to get money to pay off your drug dealer. I guess that explains your outrageous debt.”

  “What? No! That isn’t true at all. I’ve never been on drugs. Johnny is lying!”

  “Don’t deny it,” he yelled. “Shannon, I could have died tonight! Is that what you wanted? Did you hate me that much?”

  “I don’t hate you, I—”

  “No. Don’t even say it. You have no right to speak of love to me. Johnny told me about how you obsessed over me. He said you were damn near stalking me.”

  She blinked up at him in disbelief.

  “You are the one who tracked me down remember?” she finally said. “You are the one who came into my work with your ‘proposition’.”

  “And look how easily you accepted. You all but fell into my bed but I guess that was part of your plan. Tell me, how much money were you going to get? More than I was paying you? Did you agree to fuck them like you were fucking me?”

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Dev’s words made Shannon’s skin crawl. “I don’t know what you’re talking about! There are no other men—”

  “Bullshit! God, I should have listened to Marco and fucked you once and then let you go. I knew better than this.” His hard stare burned through her. “And to find out from Johnny that you were a call girl…I guess that explains it though. Why you were so willing to climb into my bed after a price had been named.”

  He thought she was one of Johnny’s prostitutes? No! She shook her head in denial.

  “I have to give you props. You played your part well. A semi-innocent woman who needed help thrust into a world she didn’t understand. But you understood all along didn’t you?”

  He pulled her against his chest. His heart was beating wildly against hers and she willed herself not to cry.

  “If I took you right now, you probably wouldn’t even complain. You would open your legs and let me fuck you, wouldn’t you?”

  She hated how her body reacted to his words. She hated that even in that moment she wanted him. He lowered his head and she feared he was going to kiss her.

  “No.”

  “Liar.”

  “Devlin James, you need to calm the fuck down and listen to me. Johnny is lying. I can explain everything if you will just listen.”

  “I don’t want to hear it, Shannon. The police are the ones you are going to want to speak to, not me.”

  “Good. Then I will tell them what I’m trying to tell you. I saved you tonight remember? I’m not one of Johnny’s call girls either. But he is the one who’s been blackmailing me. He’s had a hold on me since I met him and I’ve tried to get away.”

  She needed to tell him everything, to make him understand what had happened. He needed to know how she had been so broken when she got mixed up with Johnny Ice.

  He took in a ragged breath. “Shannon, I’m done. This is over.”

  Hot tears began to roll down her cheeks and she brushed them away with her hand.

  “That’s right,” she said. “Walk away without hearing my side of the story like you always do.”

  He didn’t reply but went to the door instead.

  “I’ll give you a few moments to collect yourself. Then I’ll let Marco deal with you.”

  Deal with her? The door shut and she heard his footsteps fading away.

  She couldn’t just sit there and wait for him or Marco to come back and hand her to the cops. She hadn’t done anything wrong! Well not in this case at least.

  She grabbed a pen and scribbled a quick note. She set the sheet of paper on the middle of the bed and then went to the closet.

  A black duffle bag lay on the floor and she grabbed it. Without thinking, she tossed in anything she could fit in the bag. The gown she wore would only hinder her so she stripped down and threw on some jeans and a t-shirt. Her time was short before Dev returned.

  Her purse sat on the side of the bed and she picked up the bag. She faltered for a moment. Was running away really going to solve anything? Right now it seemed as if it was her only choice.

  Without thinking, she opened the window and looked down. If she held onto the shutter, she could lower herself close enough to the ground that she could just let go.

  She held her breath as she climbed through the window and prayed she didn’t break anything as she fell toward the ground. The soil gave no mercy as she hit, her ankle twisting in the process. She cried into the duffle bag so no one would hear her.

  With great trouble she stood. Now she just had to climb over the brick fence and get the hell out of there. No problem, she thought as she hobbled toward the shadows. She just prayed Mrs. Ingram would look after Alice until Shannon could send for the little dog.

  * * * * *

  Several hours later Shannon sat beside a desk at the police station. The female detective smiled sadly.

  “Thank you for your statement, Ms. Bray. I’m sorry you were dragged into this.”

  Shannon shook her head and got to her feet. “No—thank you for listening to me and for believing me. Dev…” Her voice broke. She cleared her throat and said, “Dev wouldn’t let me explain.”

  The detective nodded. “The officers who spoke to him said the same thing. Your statement is going to hold up though, so we won’t be detaining you here overnight.”

  Relief filled her body.

  She bit her lip. “Will you need anything else from me? I was planning on going back home as soon as possible.”

  The detective flipped through a stack of papers. “We have your information in case we need anything else. You are free to do whatever you please.”

  “Do you know if they caught the hooded man from the arena?”

  “I’m not supposed t
o comment on this but no, we haven’t. We will though. And your statement against Mr. Ice hopefully will help us bring him down. After running his name through the system we discovered he has his hands in a few questionable ventures.”

  The thought of seeing Johnny behind bars helped her aching heart.

  “I’m glad. He has gotten away with too much for too long.” She picked up her duffle bag. “Thank you again. For everything.”

  The detective walked her out of the interview room and through the station. When they reached the front door Shannon stopped.

  “If Dev asks about me, please…”

  The woman smiled. “Don’t worry, Ms. Bray. We won’t tell him where you’re going. The only thing we’ll say is that your statement was very helpful.”

  She nodded. “Thank you, Detective.”

  With a deep breath she walked into the cool night air. A cab sat waiting for her to take her to the airport.

  “Where to, ma’am?”

  “Home. I’m going home.”

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Dev couldn’t believe eighteen days had passed since Shannon left him. By all accounts she had fallen off the face of the Earth. And he missed her. Fuck.

  “I need to talk to you,” Marco said from the other side of the door.

  Dev tossed back another shot of vodka. “Go away. I don’t want to be disturbed right now.”

  “This is important. You know I wouldn’t come here if my news wasn’t urgent.”

  Dev stood and walked on unsteady legs to the door. Why was the room tilted? He opened the door and leaned against the frame for support.

  “What?”

  Marco looked him over and sighed. “How long have you been drinking?”

  “Since she left,” he admitted.

  “That’s why I’m here,” he said as he walked into the room without being invited. “What exactly happened that night?”

  “Do we really need to do this right now?”

  He wasn’t in the mood to relive what an ass he had been.

  “Devlin…listen to me. I need to know what happened.”

  His eyes sharpened on his friend. Marco had only used his full name a handful of times since they had met. Shit. He went back to his desk and sat down.

  “I confronted her about setting me up. I told her I knew she was working with that motherfucker, John Ice.”

  Marco closed his eyes. “That is what I was afraid of. Did you say anything else?”

  “After I got back here that night, before Shannon showed up, I looked at the PI report you had put together. That damn report confirmed every word that son-of-a-bitch said, Marco. Why the fuck didn’t you tell me any of this? I relied on you to tell me the truth, to keep me informed.”

  Marco shook his head and sighed. “Tell me you didn’t confront Shannon about that stuff…” he said softly.

  “Of course I did! Why the fuck wouldn’t I? I told her what the investigator found out, about her working at the club as a call girl.” He thought for a moment. “And the drugs. I mentioned the drug use.”

  “God dammit!” Marco exclaimed. “Why can’t you ever listen to me? I told you I had concerns about the PI report and it turns out I was right.”

  “You better start talking now, Marco,” Dev replied as he sat forward, his head suddenly clearing from the alcohol fog.

  “The investigator’s been double-crossing us. He works with John Ice too and when Ice found out you were keeping tabs on Shannon he fed the investigator false information. He set you up, Dev.”

  An image of Shannon’s tear-streaked face popped up in his head. Fuck, she had been trying to tell him Ice’s accusations weren’t true but Dev hadn’t listened.

  “How much was a lie?”

  Marco ran his hand through his hair. “I don’t even know where to start. The new investigator I hired is still looking into everything but he did manage to find out a few basic facts.”

  “Such as…?”

  “First of all Shannon was not working at the club as a call girl. Apparently John had something over her head to blackmail her into becoming one though.”

  “What happened to stop her?”

  From what Dev knew of Ice, he always got what he wanted. Rumors even suggested people had disappeared for crossing him.

  “You happened,” Marco replied in a low voice. “She was supposed to meet with Ice two days after she came here. Obviously she never went to the meeting but she did drop off a check for fifty-thousand dollars.”

  He remembered when he hadn’t been able to find her after they had made love that first night. His gut clenched. He had accused her of doing something shady then.

  “What else?”

  “The investigator was able to find out what the money was for. Five years ago Shannon hit rock bottom. She drank heavily and had some sort of accident where she became addicted to prescriptions pain pills. After meeting Ice she got involved in a drug deal that went bad.

  “She took full blame for the deal and was looking at some major jail time. But guess who knew the judge and got the charges dropped?”

  “Son of a bitch,” Dev said. “And he held the arrest over her head didn’t he?”

  “Things get worse.” Marco paused and took in a deep breath. “Dev…she never had the abortion.”

  The air left Dev’s lungs in a whoosh and he felt as if he had been punched in the stomach.

  “Are you sure?”

  Marco nodded. “Her parents took her to a clinic in Dallas and all but forced her to have it done but she refused. There are records of her receiving prenatal care in a clinic in Oklahoma City.”

  Dev’s hands clenched. “Where is the child? Did she give it up for adoption?”

  The thought of strangers raising his son or daughter made him sick. He knew what it was like to be unwanted and he couldn’t bear the thought of his child feeling the same.

  “I don’t know how to tell you this, man…she lost the baby.”

  Tears filled his eyes. “Was it because of the drinking and drugs?”

  “No. As far as we know she wasn’t doing either of those then. The autopsy report stated the cause of death is unknown. We haven’t been able to get a hold of the doctor she was seeing to find out more.”

  “Is there anything else?”

  Dev didn’t know how much more he could handle hearing.

  “She tried to contact you after leaving Texas. Apparently she had high hopes of finding you so you could be a family.”

  He remembered his mom telling him Shannon kept calling. God, did she lose the baby because of him?

  “The drinking and drugs started a short while after she lost the baby. She was even pulled over for D.W.I.”

  So that much from the original investigator’s report was true then. He remembered Shannon laughing at him, saying he needed a new investigator. She had been so right.

  “Do we have any idea where she might be?” he asked.

  Marco had several people trying to find Shannon. After a week in Colorado, Marco had convinced Dev to go back to his house in Miami to wait things out away from the press. His gut said that if there was any new information, then he would already know.

  “We are still looking,” Marco replied slowly. “My men are checking all local hospital and shelters. We are also working with the FBI, who is just as interested in finding John Ice as we are.”

  Dev took in a deep breath. “I think I need to go back to Texas. Her parents might be able to give me some kind of clue as to where she went.”

  She hadn’t talked to her parents in over eight years but maybe she had contacted a cousin or something. Hell, it was the only thing he could hope for.

  * * * * *

  Dev stood in front of the familiar house. God, nothing had changed at all. The perfectly manicured lawn grew greener than any natural grass could. The white house didn’t have one chip in the paint, not even on the third floor.

  His gaze went to the window of Shannon’s old room. She used to hang crystals
near the glass so the stones would catch the evening sun. Now a dark curtain covered the window.

  He took in a deep breath and walked up to the front porch. The door swung open before he had a chance to ring the bell.

  “Well look who it is!” Shannon’s mom gushed. “I didn’t believe my eyes at first but I knew it was you—I recognize your face from the cover of People magazine!”

  The stench of bleach hit his nose and he tried not to gag. For as long as he could remember, the Brays’ house had smelled like that. The scent reminded him of a clinic where everything remained cold and sterile.

  “Hello, Mrs. Bray. I was wondering if I could speak to you and Mr. Bray.”

  “My, such manners! You certainly aren’t the same boy who grew up on the other side of the tracks now are you?”

  His jaw clenched as he tried to remember his goal. Shannon. He needed to find his Shannon.

  “May I come in?”

  She nodded and let him pass. His eyes adjusted to the dark hallway after a moment but he wasn’t surprised to see nothing had changed inside either. His gaze skimmed the familiar photos on the wall but all the ones with Shannon were gone.

  “Where did the pictures of Shannon go?”

  Mrs. Bray’s face fell. “I…I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  She led him to the formal living room where Mr. Bray sat in his chair, reading the paper. For as long as Dev could remember, that man had sat in that chair doing the exact same thing.

  “Hello, Mr. Bray.”

  The older man’s dark eyes lifted briefly and then his gaze returned to his paper. “What are you doing here?”

  Still arrogant, Dev thought. And I still want to knock him onto his ass.

  Biting back a smart reply, he said, “I wanted to talk to you about Shannon. Have you heard from her recently?”

  Mr. Bray huffed. “We haven’t heard from that trollop since we kicked her out eight years ago. Tell me, did she ever tell you she ended up keeping your bastard?”

  Hot anger rose in Dev’s stomach. Years of controlling his rage were slipping through his fingers as each moment passed.