Without Knowing (When You Wake Book 1)

by Ashley Parker

  It was an intimate kitchen with a breakfast nook and dinner table for a family of four. It could hardly fit the staff I saw carrying loaded trays through the halls for the party. This kitchen wasn’t made to serve a grand home.

  I looked through the door on the far end. It led to another garage. Eight garages sat at the front of the property. I wasn’t sure what a man could possibly need with another two-car garage out back.

  I fumbled through the drawers, utensils for a small family. He must have a second kitchen somewhere. In the last drawer, I pulled out a pen and notepad. I’d nearly forgotten about these. I didn’t see any in the house, not even near the phones for messages…not even a phone.

  I wasn’t aware of a lot, but it was starting to look like these things were being kept out of sight from me. I couldn’t understand something as simple as a pen and paper? I slipped them into my back pocket and left the kitchen.

  I checked out the common room, living room, and even the offices. Computer towers, laptops, and monitors were all missing from the offices. I looked through each cabinet and drawer, and to no avail, did I find a phone or even a keyboard.

  The longer I looked around, the more the house looked empty. My mother used to sell homes. She had to stage a house before she brought in a client. Each room had something different; one room appealed to the wife, another room made for the husband, and a third room was created to appeal to the both of them. I was getting the stagy vibe.

  There was still no sign of the staff or babysitters in the workout wing and I still hadn’t scratched the surface. I stared at the pool and wished I was surrounded by water. Shivers ran down my back at the thought of Seth watching me from this very spot.

  I headed back to my room to put on some jeans and hide the pen and notepad. I couldn’t wear the shorts any longer. Baby steps. I paused in front of Caleb’s door. I’d never seen or even had a peek inside his room. I was curious to know where he slept.

  I looked around, still in the clear, and tried the knob. I was surprised to find the door unlocked. I pushed the door open and quickly stepped in, closing it behind me. His masculine room was nothing like my room. I understood now where the touches of update around the house came from.

  His king size bed was the smallest thing in the room. The leather couch faced the large flat screen TV that took up the entire wall it was reinforced on. The cabinet off to the right of his TV held accessories for what looked like every gaming system, including ones I didn’t recognize. The mini refrigerator was stocked with beer and energy drinks.

  The center of the ceiling was made of glass, a complete view of the sky from the luxury of his bed. The large bay window on the opposite wall of his door had bunch seating that doubled as storage. It was easier to see that the house was almost completely surrounded by water.

  I continued around the room. There were shelves full of games, movies, magazines, and pictures. I stopped to look at the people in the pictures. The man cave Caleb created was centered on these people. I looked down the line and stopped at the two little boys, arms over each other’s shoulders. Caleb’s family?

  I continued down the line and noticed the pictures were all taken on the same day, nothing before, nothing after. I poked through his drawers and closet, but there were no other pictures, not even of Caroline. I almost took satisfaction in that fact until I realized I also wasn’t in any of the pictures.

  I stood pondering if I’d missed something. I stared at his bed wondering if he slept better than I had since my Pull to the chase in the snow. Next to my night terror when Seth first stayed here, I just wasn’t sleeping well. And then it hit me.

  I dropped to my knees and army crawled under his bed. I nearly missed the single wooden box tucked away in the corner. I pulled the small box into the light. A few balls of dusts followed, making me sneeze.

  I lifted the latch and opened the lid hoping it wasn’t something gross boys hid under their beds. I pulled out the tissue paper lying on top. Wrapped within the paper was another picture.

  I studied the picture carefully. The picture was of Caleb with his hand hanging over a little girl. I looked back at the pictures on display in his room. It was taken on the same day as the others on the shelves. My eyes refocused on the picture in my hand, more closely at the girl with Caleb…Me.

  We couldn’t be more than nine in the picture, but there was something different about the way I looked in the picture - a change that doesn’t just happen from aging. I tried to remember that day, the picture, the others, Caleb. I couldn’t see passed the moments captured in the frames.

  I turned the picture over to see if anything was written on the back and found there was more to the picture. I unfolded the rest of the picture to see another smiling boy on the other side of me. Suddenly, my breath caught in my chest. I looked over the folded boy’s features hoping for further recollection, but only found my breath had returned.

  I looked through the box, but it was empty. I wanted to leave the picture in the box, and the box back under the bed as if I’d never found it, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. It was a link and I just couldn’t leave it there only to have it disappear.

  I pulled the notepad from my back pocket and tore a sheet from the back of the pad. I wrapped it in the tissue paper and placed it back in the box, closed the lid and placed the box where I found it. It was a bargaining chip and I needed it to be in a safe place.

  I slipped the picture into the pad and it and the pen back in my pocket. I stood up and headed back to my bedroom checking the hallway for any foot soldiers along the way. I locked my room from the inside and rushed to find the perfect hiding place.

  Under my bed….Duh!

  Under my mattress…They change the sheets more often than they dust the lamp shades.

  The bathroom…Water and old picture don’t mix.

  The closet…Possibility.

  Clipped to the back of curtain...They shake and pound those things randomly.

  The desk… Caleb plays around the desk too much.

  The picture frames behind another picture…Another possibility, but it is too close to the fire.

  The chest under the bay window…The chest…

  I always admired the uniqueness of the chest. Although it was old, it didn’t match the elderly décor of my room. No, it hid in plain sight. It was used for seating and I never thought anything was kept in it. The oak had a cherry stain and leather straps that wrapped it on both sides of the chest, unhooking at the front like a belt. I flipped open the latch and opened the top.

  As I pulled the large handmade quilt from the chest, my nose filled with the smell of apples. A burst of colors and feelings washed over me catching me off guard. I lost the smoothness of my breathing finding it difficult to keep my balance.

  My feet pulled me through the fields of gold. Sticks of wheat tickled my hands as I brushed through them. Enjoyment flew with the breeze as his hands slipped around my waist, his arms tightening around me.

  My screams evolved into an eruption of giggling and uncontrollable laughter. His warmth lightened my darkness. His breath brushed against my skin until I felt his lips. I turned to face him, the man with the awakening touch. The emptiness suddenly…

  The banging on my door tore the beauty of gold away from my sight. I moved quickly to conceal the picture and quilt in the chest. I settled myself on my bed as Seth burst through the door, keys jiggling in his hand.

  “What’s going on up here, Ms. Eva?” Seth was nearly out of breath.

  “Just here in my room. What could I be doing?” I answered as uncaring as I could.

  “You locked yourself in?”

  “I showered, wanted to make sure I wasn’t walked in on.”

  “I do apologize for my tardiness,” he began.

  “I’ve been up long enough to shower and dress. I didn’t even notice you weren’t outside.” I stood from the bed. The keys in Seth’s hands dropped to the ground.

  “Different get-up today?” he asked
staring a little too long at my body as he searched for the keys with his hands.

  “I have legs, arms, shoulders, and a neck. You’ve seen me in a one piece,” I announced remembering he had no problem assisting me out of the pool.

  “That’s pool attire.” He straightened himself, keys in hand.

  “Are we going to have a problem?”

  My workout clothes consisted of yoga pants and a tank top with a zipper jacket that I never took off. My bathing suit wasn’t always restricted to the pool area. I was usually covered with a towel, but he never objected.

  “No, Ma’am. I just don’t think it’s appropriate with just us men folk in the house, or at all really,” he corrected himself.

  Chivalry? It was an odd combination. I wasn’t sure how to take him.

  “I appreciate your concern, Seth…I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your last name.”

  “It’s Schultz.” He was distracted still not looking at my face.

  “But I don’t seem to understand the problem with what I’m wearing. You’ve never questioned my bathing suit.”

  “You’re right, it’s not my place,” he cleared his throat. “Since Mr. Caleb has given the staff the next few days off, we will be managing your meals.”

  “I see, and why has the staff been relieved for the duration of his absence?” I asked almost with authority.

  “He felt it would be easier to manage security while things blow over after the party.”

  “I see. I’ve embarrassed him.” I looked away. I played with my hands.

  “Look, I wasn’t there, but yes, I believe he just wanted to give everyone some time and make our jobs a little easier.” He was comforting me.

  “Thank you for your honesty.” I turned back around.

  “I know we didn’t get off on the right foot, but I hope you know we’re all just doing our jobs.”

  “You’re right. I haven’t been fair. I have my issues with Dr. Nyssa and whatever I thought……” I paused. The endless nights of Pulls replayed in my head. “Let’s just start over.” I extended my hand.

  “I’m glad to hear that. The guys and I wanted to have a nice dinner for you tonight. One of the youngin’s, Thomas, makes a killer lasagna.” He smiled.

  “Sounds great, looks like 8 o’clock on the schedule.” I grabbed the laminated sheet off the desk.

  “We’ll all be in uniform.” He headed to the door. “Ma’am, I really hope you cover up in the presence of men. You are unclaimed, after all.”

  “And what century are you from?” I was becoming more annoyed with his old school speech.

  “I’ll see you at dinner.” He shut the door.

  I read over the schedule and he didn’t expect me for the workouts, time in the common room or living room. He seemed just as uncomfortable with what I was wearing as I was, but my response to his recommendation obviously upset him.

  I suspected I wouldn’t be bothered for the rest of the day, but I wouldn’t risk allowing the picture or notepad to be seen. I thought of Seth’s tardiness. It wasn’t like him or the other’s to leave my door unattended. Regardless, I was grateful for the chance to find out anything new with my own two eyes.

  The dining room was dimly lit with each guy waiting at their seat. Seth almost seemed relieved as I entered the room. I decided on a modest long sleeve turtleneck and jean skirt that hung down to my ankles. My attire wasn’t for him.

  Candles filled the room and table, the men stood as Seth tucked me into my seat at the head of the table, Seth seat was at the opposite end.

  “I hope you don’t mind, but we’re not used to bright and fancy.” The gentleman to my immediate right sat first.

  “We enjoy low-key,” the youngest spoke from the back corner seated next to Seth.

  “It’s perfect and everything smells delicious. Who should I thank for our meal this evening?” I placed the napkin on my lap.

  “Thomas, a fine lad. With your permission, I ask that he say grace.” Seth pointed to the man sitting on the other side of him.

  “Of course.” We bowed our heads.

  As Thomas prayed, I watched as each man cherished his words. The prayer over a candle lit meal felt, oddly, as things should.

  They all knew each other. As we said our amens and with respect, served each other from the dishes closest to us before anyone ate. It was the only sense of structure I enjoyed. I yearned for this company.

  “So, Ms. Eva,” Jake, as they called the young one sitting next to Seth, spoke. “I’m surprised you haven’t returned home.”

  The not so subtle kick under the table ended our natural conversation over Thomas’ culinary skills in the kitchen. Everyone stopped eating, unable to ignore what was said.

  “Don’t mind him,” Seth spoke wiping the corner of his mouth.

  “I’d love to know what you mean, Jake.” I removed my napkin from my lap and placed it on the table.

  “I didn’t mean anything, Ma’am.” Jake hunched over his plate adding another fork full of lasagna into his mouth.

  I pushed my chair away from the table, watching each man at their seat.

  “Eva, please.” Seth stood and added to my barely touched glass of wine.

  Each sat in their seat noticeably nervous. Thomas leaned with his mouth on his fingers playing with his lips. Jake continued to eat his food avoiding eye contact. The other four men at the table twitched, played with their hair, their hands, and tapped their fingers on the table.

  I questioned their reaction and their treatment of me since their arrival. Regardless of my treatment of them during my lock down, Seth most of all, had changed his tune.

  “Jake, would you mind?” I asked again.

  He signed heavily as if thinking carefully through what he was going to say. “I just wondered when you were going home is all.”

  Before I could inhale on that thought, Seth spoke, “I’m sorry, Ms. Eva. Jake, isn’t aware of your situation.”

  “Please, stop speaking for the kid. I appreciate that you’re trying to cover for him as he said something he shouldn’t have, but I would consider it a favor if you would let it go, as it was all of you that gave it away.”

  The men rushed to their forks and continued eating. They knew they were partially to blame for making a mountain out of a molehill.

  “You’ve given yourselves away. You obviously know more than I.” How was the security more aware of the details of my life? How were they allowed to know more than me?

  “If you ask us to betray…”

  “Why is this conversation of my previous home a secret? This is my home now. I have no plans to return anywhere since I’m already home.” I was careful with my words.

  They hesitated before another bite. They almost seemed confused, and upset, by what I said.

  “Thank you all for a wonderful evening. I will see you in the morning.”

  As I stood, they stood. I walked into the hall, but instead of going to my room, I headed down the hall for some fresh air. It was frustrating knowing that everyone knew more about me than I did. I flipped through each of their faces waiting for something to jump out at me. The setting was so familiar while they were not. I walked out to the gazebo, hoping to clear my head.

  I played dumb far too long and the momentary night and day filled with the possibilities of answers was depleting. I thought back to the warmth I felt holding the quilt from the chest. His hands and arms wrapped around me comforting me while the thoughts of gold were interrupted.

  “You can’t be out here!” Seth grabbed my arm.

  “Yeah, I don’t care.”

  “I’ve broken enough rules for you. I can’t do anything for you if I’m fired.” He pulled me towards the house.

  I shrugged him away leaving us in the middle of the yard. The crashing of the waves echoed behind us.

  “What was all of that?” I pointed at the house.

  “Don’t ask me that.” His face was stern.

  “Yeah, I’m staying out here. I need the air.
At least out here no one can lie to me.”

  “You’d be surprised.” His eyebrows arched.

  “And what is that supposed to mean?” I threw my hands in the air.

  “Stop asking me questions I can’t answer.” He shook me, bringing me closer to him, both hands on either of my shoulders.

  Before I could banter back, his lips were on mine, the care and passion, the tenderness. My body responded in surprise as I forgot about everything, my anger melting away. And for a moment, I was okay.

  The wind picked up bringing me to my senses and I pulled away. He was confused and the look of shock increased in his eyes.

  “If you will excuse me, I’m going to my room.” I moved around Seth.

  “Stop,” anger poured from his mouth.

  “I’ve really had enough for one evening,” I continued.

  “Are you kidding me? We’ve all gone through a lot of trouble to bring you home and you want to screw that up?”

  I stopped.

  “We thought you were dead and now that we’ve found you, you want to be difficult.” His face scrunched at me.

  “Bring me home?” My warnings of Seth, my fall, could they all be connected?

  “We never stopped looking for you, you know?” He took a step closer.

  I stepped back keeping the distance between us wide. “Why didn’t you just tell me that? We could just leave. Nothing is stopping us. I could have all the answers now and we could just go.” His eyes frightened me.

  “We needed to know what Caleb has planned for you, so we can stop him before he comes for you again.”

  “He took me?”

  “From the Colony, our home.”

  “You’re all from there.” He made so much sense that none of it made sense. Caleb couldn’t have taken me, I was running from someone to Caleb.

  “We are, my brothers, you’re followers.”

  “My followers?” I don’t have followers. I’m not a leader.

  “Yes, you’re our Vatic. A type of seer.”

  I tried to hide how unsurprised I was. “I’m not a seer. I can’t be. I don’t have gifts…”

  “When we met, you saw something. We shook hands and you fell.” He took another step towards me, reaching out to me. I stepped back again.