Aria nods and smiles indulgently as she rises from her seat at the table. Gray follows her, leaving me standing here with Amara. The second the two of them disappear behind the door, Amara turns to me and squeals as she grabs my hands, jumping up and down in excitement.
“Oh my God, Noah. Did you hear that? They’ll invest! My two heroes are investing in my company!”
She’s so excited that she’s got tears in her eyes, and I decide here and then that this is my favorite look on her. Happiness looks great on her.
I take a step closer to her and tangle my hand in her hair, pulling her toward me roughly. She moans when my lips come crashing down on hers and rises to her tiptoes to deepen the kiss. Her hands slide up my shoulders until she’s got her arms wrapped around my neck, our bodies pressed together. I kiss her fiercely, taking her mouth the way I’d been wanting to throughout her presentation.
“I knew you’d do it,” I whisper in between kisses. “I had no doubts.”
Amara pulls back to look at me, a dreamy look in her eyes. “You really believe in me, don’t you?”
I nod. “Of course. You’re the most remarkable person I know, Amara. I know you’re going to be hugely successful, and I can’t wait to see you flourish.”
She smiles at me and rises to her tiptoes to press a kiss to my cheek. “So will you, Noah. You’re going to do amazing things. I just know it.”
I hope so. I’m sabotaging myself by being here with her, by holding her the way I am, yet I can’t deny her. If I truly want to become successful and be on par with Amara, Aria, and Grayson, I’ll need to get my priorities straight. But not today. Today is for celebrating victories.
“So, what do you want to do today?” I ask, forcing myself to stay in the present, to enjoy the limited time I have with Amara.
“Honestly? Nothing. I just want to enjoy my time with you.”
I take a step closer and cup her cheek as I lean in to kiss her forehead. “I have something in mind. Get ready. We’ll leave in ten.”
Chapter 33
Amara
I look around with wide eyes, taking in the cherry blossom trees at the park, the water in front of us and the sun shining down on us. “This is perfect,” I whisper.
Noah grins at me and holds up the picnic basket he brought. “It’s the perfect place to just relax and enjoy our time together.”
I watch him as he lays down the blanket he brought and unpacks the wine and snacks we stole from Aria and Gray, before sitting down and offering me his hand. I take it with a smile.
I lean against him, and he wraps his arm around me, the two of us staring at the water. I wonder if he feels the way I do. Is he as happy in this moment as I am?
“I wanted this with you,” he says, his voice soft. “When we went to that vineyard… I kept wishing it was just the two of us. I’d have loved to go wine tasting with you, stroll through the place with your hand in mine. I wanted to call you mine then, but I couldn’t.”
He looks at me in a way he never has before, and my heart skips a beat. Yeah… Noah is feeling exactly what I’m feeling. “I’m yours now,” I whisper, wishing it could stay that way. “This day, this moment… it’s ours.”
He nods and leans in, pressing a lingering kiss to my temple. “I don’t want this week to end,” he tells me, and I swallow hard, trying my best to push aside the sorrow I feel. Noah raises his hand to my face, his touch gentle as he brushes my hair behind my ear.
I love him. There’s no doubt in my mind. The feelings I have for him can’t be described in any other way.
I bite down on my lip and rise to my knees before straddling him and settling in his lap. Noah smiles at me and places his hands on my waist, his eyes on mine. The way he looks at me… I’m tempted to believe he loves me too.
“Thank you,” I whisper. “For today. For this week.”
He looks away, hearing the words I left unsaid. Thank you for the memories. I inhale shakily and thread one hand through his hair, cupping his cheek with the other. Noah’s eyes meet mine, and the need in them matches my own.
I lean in, my lips hovering over his. I press a featherlight kiss to his lips, once, twice, before kissing him fully.
Noah groans against my lips and tightens his grip on me, kissing me back slowly, deeply. He takes his time with me, his touch different from before. He’s got my heart racing, and I find myself wishing that his is too.
He pulls away a little, his forehead dropping to mine. “I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you,” he whispers. “I’m addicted, well and truly. I need you, Amara. All of you.”
His lips drop back to mine, and this time his kiss is more frantic, his desperation as strong as mine. His hands slide up my body, until he’s got his thumbs resting underneath my breasts, drawing circles on my skin. “Tell me you’re naked underneath this dress,” he whispers against my lips. I laugh and nod, enjoying the feel of him underneath me. I love knowing how much he wants me. Everything about this moment is perfect. The desire sizzling between us, the emotions we’re both not voicing… I just know this is going to be one of those moments I’ll always remember.
Noah smiles and reaches for the picnic bag, taking out the toy we used last night. “I had a feeling you’d seduce me,” he says, smirking. “The park is mostly empty, but that could change any second. This thing… I think we could both come without moving much if we use this.”
I grin and undo his jeans, covering us both up with my dress. “I corrupted you, Dr. Grant.”
He laughs, but his smile melts away when I attach the ring. I chuckle as I turn it on, loving the power I’ve got over him. “I wanted this too,” I tell him. “At the vineyard… I wanted you to bend me over and fuck me right there against that tree. Driving you crazy with my mouth was nice, but it wasn’t enough.”
I lift myself up and position him underneath me, a teasing smile on my face. “I guess it’s only right that you make up for not giving me what I wanted that day,” I say, slowly sinking down on him, until he’s filling me up.
“I wanted this then,” he murmurs. “I always want you. I wanted you from the very second you walked into my office. You’re the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen, and I was hooked. With every interaction since then, you’ve just cemented your place in my mind further. I’m always thinking about you, Amara. I always want you. Fuck, I think you bewitched me, because I sure am fucking addicted to you.”
I smile and roll my hips, enjoying the way he bites down on his lip. “The feeling is entirely mutual, Noah.”
I wrap my hand in his hair and lean in to kiss him. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of kissing Noah. His hands roam over my body, settling on my ass. He squeezes tightly, and I gasp when he lifts me up, only to pull me back down with force, his cock driving me insane.
“How does that feel, baby? Can you feel the vibrations? Is this thing pressing against your clit?”
I nod and rotate my hips, enjoying the way Noah bites down on his lip. I love seeing him lose his mind over me.
He thrusts up, pushing deeper into me, his arms wrapped around me. Sitting her with him, face-to-face with him buried so deep inside me… this is perfection.
“Oh God,” I whisper, my hands on his shoulders. There’s something about this moment, being out here in the open, barely able to move.
Noah freezes and keeps me still, his lips brushing over my ear. “There’s a lady with a stroller heading our way,” he whispers, and I giggle, suddenly nervous.
He looks at me, and we both burst out laughing, but Noah’s laugh is cut short when his eyes widen. “Fucking hell… when you laugh like that your pussy tightens. Don’t make me come with some stranger walking right by us,” he warns, and I blush.
“That sounds like a challenge.” Noah looks past me, and I watch his face as I tilt my hips back and forth as subtly as I can, giving him the extra friction I know he needs to come.
Noah drops his head to my shoulder, our bodies flush, his lips pressed to my neck.
“You’ll be the death of me,” he whispers. “I can’t take it when you move like that.”
I’m teasing him, but I’m on the edge myself. I doubt I’ll be able to hang on much longer, not with the way he feels inside me, with the way this toy presses against my clit.
I breathe a sigh of relief when I hear the wheels of a stroller pass by us, and I turn to watch the woman walk past us, her eyes fixed on her baby. She glances at us and smiles indulgently. To her it must look like we’re hugging… if only she knew. I smile back at her and hide my face against Noah’s shoulder, my cheeks blazing.
The second we’re out of view, Noah grabs my hair, pulling my lips against his roughly. The way he kisses me gets me close, but it’s the way he moves his hips, the way he pulls on my hair… that’s what pushes me over the edge.
Noah silences my moans with his lips, and when he pulls away, he’s grinning in satisfaction. “Ride me. Ride me good,” he orders.
And I do. I use his cock and the toy to make myself come again, and Noah watches me as I lose control all over again. When my pussy contracts around him, he whispers my name, coming right along with me.
He leans back on his arms, his eyes on mine as we both try to calm our raging hearts. “I didn’t think you could get more beautiful. I was wrong,” he whispers. “The toy is a keeper.”
I smile and wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him back to me. “So are you,” I murmur, right before kissing him.
I don’t want this week to end. This right here, I don’t want this to end… but I know we’re on borrowed time.
Chapter 34
Noah
I slip out of bed, glancing at Amara in my bed. The last couple of days have been perfect, and the thought of going back to what we were before terrifies me. I can’t see my life without her anymore.
I sigh as I slip out of bed and make my way to the kitchen, surprised to find my sister sitting at the kitchen counter, a fuzzy robe wrapped around her.
“Can’t sleep?” she asks.
“How’d you know?”
Aria smiles, a knowing look in her eyes. “You’ve always been this way. You’ve never been able to sleep when you’re worried, and ever since yesterday you’ve had that look in your eyes. The one that never used to leave your eyes when we were younger, the gaze that told me you weren’t sure if we’d have enough money for groceries, if you’d be able to stay in school.”
I sit down next to her, a deep sigh escaping my lips. “I didn’t realize you were aware of all of that. I tried so hard to shield you from it, Aria… but I… I failed you. I failed you in so many ways, and I see it more clearly the older I get. I don’t know how you turned out so wonderful considering our past, but I’m so incredibly proud of you, kiddo.”
She looks at me, her eyes watery. “Noah, I turned out this way because of you. Because you taught me to work hard no matter what life throws at us, to value the things we have, and to put family first. If not for you, I don’t even know where I’d be now. You are and always have been my role model. I’m proud of you too, you know?”
I look away, unable to hold her gaze. I wish I were the man she thinks I am. She’s Nyx, a notorious hacker and vigilante. She built her platform without me even knowing. I didn’t realize what she was up to until Grayson mentioned her platform and her username. He didn’t realize who she was, but I did. I knew the second I heard the name Nyx. She’s brilliant, and so is Grayson. Hell, even Amara is going places. It’s just me that’s not.
“You’re quiet,” she murmurs. “Tell me, Noah. What has you so worried? Amara is lovely, and she’s as crazy about you as you are about her.”
I sigh and turn to face her. “It’s not that simple, Ari. I work for her grandfather, and he’s made it clear she’s off-limits to me. You don’t understand… the opportunities Harold Astor is giving me are unreal. I’m not like you, Ari. I can’t get where you and Gray are without connections, without help. He’s opening doors for me I can’t even reach by myself. Being with Amara is guaranteed to ruin my career, and I’ve worked so hard to get where I am today. But it isn’t enough. I don’t want to be a salaried worker bee. I don’t want to be just another one of Amara’s family’s employees. I don’t want to be the help.”
She nods. “So let me invest in you. Let’s buy you a clinic. Would that help?”
I smile at her. “I love you, Ari, but I need to do this by myself. Besides, a single clinic doesn’t compare to what I’m managing now. It’d be slightly better than being a salaried doctor, but it still…”
“Who are you trying to measure up against?” she asks, a frown on her face. “I’m all for ambition and I’ll support you in any way I can, but Noah… you’re incredible, just as you are. Who is making you feel as though you aren’t good enough?”
“You don’t understand,” I murmur, and she doesn’t, she can’t. Aria is brilliant in her own right. Even when she was doing an underpaid job she hated, she had her platform and the prestige that came with her pseudonym. If she never found a job she loved, she’d still have left her mark on the world. But I? I’m just doing the bare minimum. I always have been.
She’s right to say I compare myself to others, but it’s only because I know Amara eventually will. Whether I like it or not, as I am now, I can’t give her as much as Gregory could. When it comes down to it, I don’t have anything to offer her. I own my home, but I haven’t paid off the mortgage yet, and I still have student loans to pay off. I can’t maintain the lifestyle she’s gotten used to. She tells me she grew up poor, but I know from experience how hard it is to go from being well off to suddenly being poor. When Aria and I lost our parents, our entire life was turned upside down. We were okay, but it was never easy. I can’t put Amara through that type of hardship.
“Has Amara… has she told you much about her family?” Aria asks, snapping me out of my thoughts.
I turn to look at her and nod. “I’m quite close to her grandfather, and her mother occasionally drops by my office with lunch. They’re both kind good people. It was unexpected, really. They’ve welcomed me with open arms, and I truly count myself lucky for it.”
Aria nods and looks away. “What about her father?”
I shake my head. “All I really know is that he was a janitor, and her mother was disowned for choosing to be with him. He left them when she was younger, and that’s all I really know. He’s been contacting her recently, and she’s been ignoring him. She doesn’t like to talk about him. The first time he texted her, she had a full-blown panic attack, so I try not to probe.”
Aria nods, her expression pensive. “I see,” she murmurs. “Do you love her, Noah?” She turns to look at me, her gaze tense.
“Yes,” I say, my voice calm and certain. “There’s much I’m not sure about. Hell, I don’t even know what my future looks like, but this I know. I love her. I shouldn’t, but I do.”
Aria smiles. “Then that’s all that matters. Amara is not her family. She didn’t choose to be born into that family, but she did choose you.”
Her words remind me of the words Amara uttered when I tried to distance myself from her. She begged me not to punish her for who her family is. Those words held true then, and they do now too.
“I know she isn’t,” I murmur, exhausted. “I know, Ari… but I can’t escape her family, not right now. I want the future Harold is offering me. I want it with my heart and soul. This opportunity, it’s the chance of a lifetime.”
Aria smiles at me. “Noah, you can have both, you know?”
I smile and raise my hand to her face, tucking her hair behind her ear. I’ve always loved Aria’s naivety. “I can’t, sweetheart. I wish. Harold specifically told me to stay away from her. He doesn’t want us together. That man… he’s powerful.”
Aria crosses her arms. “So am I,” she says, her eyes narrowed. “I can find dirt on him. I’ll happily destroy him if he threatens your happiness.”
I burst out laughing and shake my head. “And ruin the relationship betw
een Amara and her grandfather? You can’t, Ari. I’ll find a way, okay? I just need some time. I don’t know what to do, but I’ll find a way.”
She nods. “I’m here, you know. My offer stands. It always will. There’s nothing I won’t do to ensure your happiness, Noah. I see how happy she makes you, and I want that for you. Don’t let anyone take that from you.”
I nod and cup her cheek, barely recognizing the woman sitting next to me. When did she grow up? She’s still that little girl to me… the one that didn’t speak for years, the one that’d check all locks in the house three times before going to bed. Yet here she sits, making me more proud than she’d ever realize.
“I won’t,” I promise her, hoping I can keep that promise.
Chapter 35
Amara
Noah and I are both quiet as we board the plane. I’m not ready for this trip to end, and I don’t think he is either. I’m not ready to go back to how things used to be. I don’t think I ever will be.
Noah grabs my hand and entwines our fingers, his expression as sullen as mine must be. He seems resigned, and the look in his eyes tears me apart. He looks helpless and bitter, and I hate that I’m doing this to him. To us.
I can’t help but wonder if I’m being selfish. I want Noah with my heart and soul, but love isn’t meant to be selfish. I should want what’s best for him, but I don’t want to be without him. I want to continue calling him mine. I want to spend my nights with him, even if we do nothing at all.
My throat closes up as the plane lands, and I will myself not to cry. I’ve never felt emotions this strong, and I know I never will again. Noah… he will always have my heart.
He holds my hand as we make our way out of the plane. All throughout the airport, he holds my hand in his. He doesn’t let go until we reach his car, and even then, it’s only to open the door for me. He’s barely looked at me, sadness engulfing us both.
Dr. Grant (Off-Limits) Page 15
