Autumn Unlocked (Summer Unplugged)

by Amy Sparling

  Mom narrows her eyebrows. I feel her look from Jace to me, so I lift my gaze and finally force myself to meet her eyes. I don't know what she's thinking, but it's probably about fifty different ways to say the word no.

  Mom twists her watch around her wrist. "I think that would be fine with me." She glances behind her and then back at us. "In fact, she can go with you tonight and just stay all weekend."

  My heart jumps into my throat. What did she just say!?

  "Thank you ma'am, that works for me. I'll keep her safe," Jace says so quickly it almost sounds like one gigantic word. No doubt he's trying to get us the hell out of here before she changes her mind. Mom just gave me permission to spend not one night, but two nights with my boyfriend? Hell, I'm tempted to give her a sobriety test. Or throw her in a mental ward.

  I guess if I look at this from her perspective, if she gets me out of the house for the weekend, she's allowed all the time she wants with this mystery man with no fear of me intruding on them again.

  I could get used to this new guy.

  CHAPTER 6

  I try suppressing a yawn as I crawl out of Jace's truck, but that's nearly impossible to do so the yawn bursts out of me anyhow. I’m not tired because it’s only eight o’clock, but car rides always make me sleepy. My hand is sweaty from holding his hand in the drive here, and even though I'm excited to see his apartment for the first time, I kind of just want to go straight to bed.

  "Here it is," Jace says, throwing his arms wide to gesture to the parking lot of a mediocre apartment complex named Lakeview Apartments, despite there being exactly zero lakes around this part of Texas. He puts a hand to his chest. "Try not to be too blown away by the extravagant and luxurious way in which I live."

  I step tentatively onto a rusted metal staircase leading up to the second floor. "Don't worry," I say sarcastically. "I won't."

  We order pizza and I laugh when the delivery guy knows Jace by name—guess he orders pizza a lot. And by the looks of his super shiny clean kitchen stove, I'd say I'm probably right.

  "It sucks that we have to wake up so damn early on Sunday," I say during a commercial break from our TV watching.

  "Huh?" he asks with his mouth full of cinnamon bread.

  "We have to be awake before five in the morning for the races on Sunday. That sucks."

  Jace swallows and shakes his head. "No we don't."

  "But that's what you said?"

  He shrugs matter-of-factly. "Nah, that was a lie. I just wanted to spend more time with you."

  With a smile, I lean forward and poke him in the chest. "I think I like you."

  He wraps his fingers around my index finger and pulls me closer. We've been sitting on the floor, pizza boxes open in front of us. I lose the balance on my knees and tumble into his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck. “You taste like cinnamon,” I say after I kiss him.

  He leans his back against the bottom of the couch and pulls me into his lap to where I'm straddling him with my knees on the floor. He snuggles into my neck and my fingers tangle into his hair.

  "Mmmm," he breathes into my neck. "I've missed you."

  "I missed you too," I say, gasping when his breath tickles my neck. I try to pull away but he holds me close.

  Jace sighs. "We spent every day together this summer. It's been hard as hell living here without you for a few weeks. I wish you could stay here all the time."

  "I'm sorry I'm still in high school," I say as a pout creeps across my lips.

  He laughs and reaches across me to grab another cinnamon stick. "No need to be sorry. It isn't your fault."

  Sadness takes over and my face falls as I glance at the design on his shirt instead of looking in his eyes. This topic bothers me more than I let on. Even though Jace has been really cool and understanding about my last year of school and our long distance relationship, I can't help but worry that he won't be okay with it for very long. Eventually he will get sick of driving so far to see me, or maybe—ugh my chest hurts just thinking this—maybe he'll meet another girl who is more on his level.

  "What are you thinking about?" Jace asks. His fingers gently touch my cheek and I look up to find him staring into my eyes. "You look like something's wrong."

  I shake my head and smile, attempting to look happy, but I know it doesn't work. Jace clears his throat. "Look babe, I'm a guy so I suck at these things. I can tell something is wrong with you but I don't know what it is…I mean, did I do something to make you mad?"

  I roll my eyes. "How could you ever do anything wrong? I'm totally fine, I promise."

  He squishes his lips to the side. "That doesn't sound very convincing."

  I decide to kiss him to take his mind off the subject.

  It works better than I had expected. He kisses me back with a passion that makes my toes tingle. Before I know it, he's carried me into the bedroom. He drops me on the bed and then goes back to close the door.

  "Are you expecting anyone to walk in?" I ask as I lay back on the comforter that's not nearly as soft as mine is back at home.

  "Good point," Jace says, falling next to me onto the bed. "I guess it feels too exposed if the door is wide open."

  "What is there to expose?" I say with a cocky eyebrow lift.

  He moves on top of me, grabbing my wrists in his hands. He pins my arms to the bed and I squirm playfully, hoping to god that he doesn't start tickling me. I can't handle tickling on a stomach full of pizza.

  "Oh, I'd like to expose something," Jace says with a suggestive tone of voice. His kisses trail down my neck, sending shivers down my body as I writhe under him, unable to get out of his grasp. His hands slide down my wrists as his body moves, trailing kisses down my collar bone and then my chest. My V-neck shirt slips lower as he nudges it out of his way to kiss just above my bra. He lifts his lips from my skin and slowly looks up at me.

  His hands slide under my shirt and I lift my back off the bed to allow him to continue on his mission to remove it over my head. Once he's finished, I grab his shirt and tug. "If mine's coming off, so is yours," I whisper as I place a kiss on his lips.

  He sits up and rips his shirt off in one smooth movement, giving me a sinister grin as he lowers himself back over me. His face hovers just inches above mine. "You are ridiculously hot," he says.

  I roll my eyes. "You're not so bad yourself."

  Jace buries his head into the crook of my shoulder and licks my neck in one long slow movement that sends chills all over my body. His hips press into mine an instant later and I gasp, digging my nails into his shoulders. My heart begins to pound beneath my ribcage.

  We have never taken things this far before.

  His breath is warm against my skin. His hands glide over my chest and down my sides until his fingers hook into the waistband of my jeans.

  Panic hits me as I realize that he's about to unbutton them.

  "Jace—I don't—" My voice is a choked whisper. He freezes in the moment and then rolls off of me and takes a deep breath.

  "You don't what?" he asks me. He props his head up with his arm and looks deep into my eyes.

  "I don't…" Ugh I feel so stupid saying this. "Want to take it… um… this far." I swallow and add, "Yet. One day… just… not right now."

  The tension is so thick I think it'll suffocate me. I just wish I could crawl into a hole and stay there forever.

  Jace shakes his head and smiles. Then he sucks in a deep breath and throws his head back, looking at the ceiling. I lean over and kiss his neck but he stops me with his hand. "I need a minute to calm down."

  Hurt and embarrassed, I swallow my pride and roll over, curling up in the fetal position as I stare at the wall in front of me. I didn't want to have sex and now he's mad at me. He doesn't even want me to touch him.

  The small television in the corner of his room turns on. There's movement in the bed as Jace adjusts so that he's sitting up, leaning his back against the headboard. His calloused hand touches my shoulder but I remain still.

  "Bayl
eigh."

  "Yeah?" I say to the wall.

  His hand glides over my back in a reassuring way. "Why are you mad at me?"

  "I'm not mad at you," I mumble.

  "Sure seems like it."

  With a sigh, I roll over and face him. "You're mad at me. You're mad because I didn't want to have sex and Ian used to get mad at me for the same reason. I should have known you'd be the same way and I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry."

  He groans. "What the hell?"

  I roll back over and face the wall, ignoring him. I think I made my point clear enough. I don't need to keep explaining it.

  Jace inhales a deep breath and then talks to me without even trying to make me look at him. "I'm not going to be that guy, okay? I'm not going to be that asshole who thinks with his dick and only wants sex. I refuse to be like that." There's a pause, and when I don't say anything, he sighs again. Slowly, I roll over and face him. He continues, "It's just really fucking hard when I love you so much and you're so beautiful and—" He shakes his head and runs a hand over his face. "And, it's just hard. I'm sorry. I won't push you to do anything you don't want to do. I'm not mad. I would never be mad over that."

  My bottom lip hurts from where I'd been gnawing on it this whole time. Maybe Jace isn't like Ian at all.

  CHAPTER 7

  We sleep until noon the next day. I had always thought that sleeping next to a guy would be awkward or so nerve-wracking that I’d never actually fall asleep. It wasn’t that way with Jace. I loved every moment I spent wrapped in his arms.

  It isn’t until we’re awake that I have problems.

  Jace pours himself a third bowl of cereal while I’m still working on my first bowl. I’ve successfully eaten all the crunchy pieces and left all the marshmallows, allowing them to partially dissolve in the milk to create a sugary, pinkish mix that will be delicious when I get around to slurping it from my spoon.

  “I need to run by the track today if you don’t mind,” Jace says, but I don’t hear any of it. I’m too busy swirling my spoon around a marshmallow, letting the anxious thoughts in my mind take over. Thoughts about sex. And why I’m so nervous to just do it already. I love Jace and he loves me. I held back all summer so there’s no reason to keep holding back now. I mean, my only reservations aren’t about the sex itself, but about myself—my body isn’t perfect, I have no idea what I’m doing.

  What if I’m a terrible lay and he’s grossed out by me? What if I do or say something stupid and ruin the moment?

  “Bay-leigh,” Jace says in a sing-song voice that pulls me out of my thoughts. “Have you heard anything I just said?”

  “Huh?” I shake my head to clear my thoughts.

  Jace laughs and pours more chocolate syrup into a glass of milk. “I’ve never seen you so zoned out. What were you thinking about?” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “Picturing me naked?”

  “No,” I snap in defense, but I feel my cheeks blush anyhow. He has no idea how close his little joke is to the truth.

  My stomach twists itself into knots not even one minute after we arrive at Mixon Motocross Park. An overly jubilant girl about my age jumps off the bleachers and runs up to Jace as we walk through the grassy area between the parking lot and the dirt bike track. She wears a denim skirt that’s cut so short the fabric lining of her pockets pokes out the bottom.

  “Hey Adams,” she says, calling Jace by his last name. “I thought you didn’t work on Saturdays?”

  Her smile is full of shiny white teeth and she doesn’t take her eyes off him. Not even to bother looking at me, the girl who’s standing right next to him.

  “I normally don’t,” Jace says as he shoves his keys into his back pocket. “I just have to check on a few things before the races.”

  The girl flips her hair over her shoulder. “I’m just watching my brother and dad ride. There was nothing else to do so I came with them.” She motions toward the bleachers where she had been sitting when we arrived. “Unlike you, no one needs me here until tomorrow,” she says with a playful flirty tone in her voice that just really annoys me.

  I reach over and grab Jace’s hand, hoping to remind him that I exist and that he can, oh you know, introduce me at any moment.

  That moment never comes though, because one second later, someone yells out Jace’s name. Still holding hands, we walk toward the person who just called for him, who is thankfully a guy and not another cute girl.

  I glance out at the track, a large dirt monstrosity of turns and jumps. A few riders are on the track now, their bikes rumbling past us with each lap. Last summer, Jace had built a track similar to this in his back yard, but it wasn’t nearly this big or impressive.

  Jace shakes hands with the guy in front of us. “Hey Frank, what’s going on?”

  Frank is a middle-aged man with shaggy hair and leathery tanned skin, who can’t seem to keep still. “I’m going crazy here, man.” He runs his hands through his hair as he talks. He’s either had way too much coffee today, or he’s got a past I wouldn’t want to know about. “My concession stand is blowing up with customers and they ain’t wanting any of my food.”

  Jace narrows his brows. “What do you mean?”

  “They all heard about Jace Adams and they want an autograph,” he says.

  This makes my boyfriend laugh. “Are you serious?”

  Frank nods. “As a mother-fucking heart attack, I tell you. They want to pay for it too. So I’ve got a business deal for you, Jace. You get me signed posters of you and we can split the money.”

  “Umm,” Jace says, running a lazy hand through his hair as he thinks. “I’ve got a stack of posters that I could sign, I guess. But people don’t have to pay for them. You can just give them away.”

  Frank’s face falls. “I don’t need people standing in line for free stuff! I have to make money. I only get paid when they buy something.”

  “So make the posters free with the purchase of food,” Jace says.

  Frank nods as his gaze wanders off into the distance. “Yeah,” he says, nodding. “Yeah I can do that. I can make a sign that says that today.” He claps Jace on the shoulder and thanks him before walking off while muttering to himself.

  “That was weird,” I say.

  Jace shrugs. “That’s just how he is.”

  We walk toward a two story white building that overlooks the track as I replay what just happened in my head. “I can’t believe people want your autograph.”

  Jace squeezes my hand in his and smiles. “And that’s why I love you.”

  We stay at the track for a few hours, mostly hanging out on the second floor of that white building. It’s an office space that is used to keep score of the race results and it also has the main microphone that makes announcements across the whole facility. Off to the side of the room is a hallway with three offices. One of them belongs to Jace.

  I sit on the edge of his desk, which is empty except for a laptop, a framed photo of us, a plastic shaker for protein drinks and two apples. He works on the computer, checking emails and organizing his training schedule with all of his clients, explaining all the various aspects of his job to me as he works.

  In the few moments of silence between his explanations, I try to think of a way to bring up the topic of sex again. Namely, the topic of sex and how I’m ready to have it. But it is not as easy as opening my mouth and letting the words spill out. In the back of my mind, I know it is that easy—just open your freaking mouth and say it. But every time my mouth opens, my throat gets dry and my palms get sweaty and I end up closing it without uttering a word.

  So yeah, I pretty much stay silent the whole time.

  “I’m almost done here,” Jace says. “Sorry it’s been so boring.”

  “It’s not boring,” I say with a smile. “It’s actually pretty sexy seeing my man at work. You have an office and everything.” I wiggle my eyebrows as I sweep my fingers across the desk. “I mean, you know what people do when they have their own office…”

  It’s a
cheesy line, but it hints at the topic I’ve been dying to bring up all day.

  “Yep,” Jace says all matter-of-factly. “They work a lot.”

  I roll my eyes. “You know what I meant.”

  He leans forward on his elbows, looking up at me since I’m taller than he is when I sit on his desk. “And what exactly did you mean?”

  It’s so quiet in the next few seconds, I fear that he will hear my heart thumping like a marching band in my chest. I have no choice but to talk to break the silence. I get the feeling Jace likes watching me hesitate over saying these words, “I mean…you know…they have sex.”

  A deliciously evil smile dances on his lips as he leans back in his chair, resting his head in his hands. “Well, my sweetheart of a girlfriend, that situation doesn’t apply to us because we don’t have sex. And that’s perfectly fine, by the way. I’m just saying…”

  I groan and roll my eyes. He really enjoys annoying me. But at least I have the opening to tell him that I am ready to take our relationship to the next level. All I have to do is put on my Big Girl Panties, open my mouth and say the words.

  A quiet knock at the door makes me jump. My head snaps around in time to see a beautiful girl poke her head in the door. Her long blonde hair is in two braids over her shoulders. “Jace?” she says, seeing him at the desk. “Oh good, you’re here.”

  I hop off the desk as she lets herself in and closes the door behind her. She glances at me but doesn’t say hello. In her defense though, I don’t say anything either. I’m too confused about why a super hot girl just walked into my boyfriend’s office.

  “Hey JoJo, what can I help you with?” Jace asks. He glances at this laptop and pulls up the spreadsheet with all of his clients on it. I see him scroll over to the line with JoJo Hart’s name on it, and verify that the balance owed is zero.

  So she’s a client? Great.

  JoJo walks to the front of his desk, placing her palms on it so that she has to lean forward as she talks. “I was hoping that you’d have time for a quick lesson today?” she asks in a high-pitched voice that I’m sure she thinks sounds endearing. It just sounds skanky to me.