‘Ruby!’ Connor waved for her to come over and she was about to pretend she hadn’t noticed but knew it would be rude, so she beamed in his direction and gave a wave. ‘I’ll just be two minutes,’ she said to her friends. ‘Any longer and you have to come and rescue me.’
‘Where did you get to at work?’ Connor asked as she came over. ‘I never saw you after supper. I thought you were down to work with me in Resus?’
‘My assessment took a bit longer than expected,’ Ruby answered.
‘Yeah,’ Connor joked, ‘you’ve always got an excuse.’ He was just chatting and joking, he certainly wasn’t there to talk about work, or tell her off, except inadvertently he had echoed Sheila’s words. It seemed to have been noticed that any patient that needed to be taken to the ward, Ruby put her hand up. Any stores or laundry that needed to be put away, Ruby was already onto it and, yes, people had noticed.
‘So?’ Connor asked. ‘How was it?’
‘How was what?’ Ruby said, biting into her lemon.
‘Your assessment?’
‘Oh, you know…’ She forced a smile and rolled her eyes. ‘Must try harder.’
Her face was burning, but she certainly wasn’t going to share with Connor all that had been said and stupidly she felt as if she was going to start crying. God, Ruby thought, she should have had that walk on the beach before she’d come in. Her eyes darted for escape, for a reason to excuse herself, and suddenly there he was. Cort Mason was back in her line of vision. This time, though, his tie was loosened and he was sitting next to a doctor she vaguely recognised. He gave her a very brief nod, or did he? Ruby couldn’t be sure, and then he turned back to his conversation but, not that she could have known it, his mind was on her.
It had been since she’d walked into the bar and perhaps, Cort admitted to himself, for a while before that.
‘Hey, Ruby!’ He pretended not to be looking, except his eyes roamed the bar and his ears were certainly not on Geoff’s conversation as Ruby’s friend came over. ‘We’re supposed to be celebrating with Tilly…’
‘Sorry, Jess!’ Ruby smiled, glad they’d remembered to rescue her! ‘Just coming… See you, Connor.’ She glanced over to the table but everyone was busy with conversations of their own, but she did, Cort noticed, make an effort. ‘Catch you guys.’ She gave a brief unreturned wave that had the light reflecting off all her silver bracelets and then as she drifted off he saw her back and there was a lot of back because she was wearing a halter neck that showed her white shoulders and way down her spine. She was also wearing a small skirt and flat sandals and for the fist time in a very long time Cort noticed everything. Then he glanced across the table and saw Siobhan’s eyes on him, watching him watching Ruby, and Cort knew to be more careful than that. So very deliberately he didn’t look out for her again after that. Instead, he chatted to Geoff and the rest of the table, yet she was there in the background, laughing and happy, a blaze of colour in the middle of the bar. Though he tried not to notice, he still did, so much so that he was aware the minute she left.
‘Leaving?’ Siobhan asked as he drained his drink.
‘No,’ Cort said, even though it had been his intention. ‘Just getting another.’
And he headed for the bar rather than for home, but though still packed, the Stat Bar felt empty now. Well, not empty, Cort thought as he squeezed his way back to the table, it just felt pointless, he decided as he sat down to wait it out.
‘We’re going to Adam’s,’ Geoff said a little while later, when Cort really was about to head for home. ‘Are you coming?’
‘Adam?’ Cort asked.
‘Adam Carmichael.’
‘Oh!’ He’d worked with Adam in the past and even if they kept only loosely in touch as Cort commuted between Melbourne and Sydney and Adam roamed the globe, working for Operation New Faces, Cort considered him a friend. ‘Is he back?’
Geoff didn’t answer. Everyone was drifting off and Cort was about to do the same, but that morning, before he’d pulled on the brown suit and chosen a lighter tie, he’d walked along a beach just a couple of suburbs from here and he’d made a promise, not to his sister, but to Beth, to say yes.
To live this life.
Except, now that he was starting to, Cort so did not want to be doing this.
One drink and he’d be out of there, Cort decided as they turned into Hill Street.
It was a nice house, Cort thought as Geoff opened the creaking gate. Sure, it needed a bit of work, but it was a lovely older building and just a two-minute walk from the beach. Who cared if it was in need of a little TLC?
There was a small decked area and the front door was open. Suddenly the music was turned on and wafted out to greet them, and as he walked in through the hall Cort wanted to turn around and walk back out, because there was a dangerous vision walking towards him.
She looked the same from the waist up as she had in the pub, though instead of a beer she was holding a glass of milk and a bag of pistachio nuts and her auburn, or rather titian, hair was now loosely clipped up.
He noticed, he really noticed, because if he didn’t then his eyes would flick down and he really didn’t want to notice that her sandals and skirt were off, that she was wearing lilac boy pants and that there was a gap between the top of them and her top, which showed a soft, pale stomach.
She’d been crying—her eyes were red and the tip of her nose was too.
‘Are you okay?’ her friend asked.
‘I’m fine, Tilly, just watching a sad movie. I didn’t realise there’d be a home invasion tonight—I’ll go and get dressed.’
She slipped past him and up the stairs and Cort headed through to the lounge—a large area with lots of sofas and magazines and a little pile of tissues. Emergency registrars sometimes made good detectives, because for reasons that shouldn’t matter to him, as someone handed him a beer, Cort put his hand on the turned-off television and confirmed what he suspected—it was cold.
And why should it even matter to him that Ruby was sitting at home crying Cort would rather not explore, he had more than enough troubles of his own to be dealing with.
No, he didn’t, Cort told himself, at least, not any more.
‘Where’s Adam?’ Cort asked Ruby’s friend.
‘He’s away.’ She smiled. ‘He’s hardly ever here…’ She must have seen him frown, and she took a moment to explain. ‘I’m Tilly, there’s Jess.’ She pointed to a blonde and then to another one. ‘And that’s Ellie.’
‘And…’ Cort started and then stopped, because what business of his was it if there had been a redhead in her underwear in their lounge just a few moments ago?
‘Oh.’ Tilly smiled. ‘There’s also Ruby—she’s the one who’s just gone to get changed. We rent the house from Adam.’
He was at a student nurses’ party.
He so did not need this.
Okay, they weren’t all students. Tilly was telling him now that she was a graduate midwife and that she’d had her first breech today, and as he tried to stop his eyes from glazing over as she went into detail, Cort decided to excuse himself and leave just the second that he could—he’d done enough ‘must get out more’ for one night.
He was just about to slip away unnoticed when Ruby came downstairs.
Whatever had been upsetting her had clearly been taken care of because there was no evidence of tears and she was back to happy now. She turned up the music and started dancing, and Cort was determined to leave, except she really was lovely to watch, all sort of loose limbed and free, and what’s more she was dancing her way over to him.
‘You look how I feel,’ Ruby said, because if ever someone didn’t want to be there it was Cort Mason. He belonged in that suit, Ruby had decided before their encounter today. He belonged behind a stethoscope, or peering down his nose at minions, except he hadn’t been like that today and she’d revised her judgement. Though she loathed Emergency and most of the staff that came with it, Cort wasn’t like the others, he was ju
st aloof.
‘You look like I never would,’ Cort said in return, and he wasn’t sure if that made sense, but even without the hellish last five years, even a decade ago, when he had belonged at student parties, he’d been the boring one. He would never stand in a room and dance alone with others watching, had never been as free as she appeared tonight. She must have caught his words because she smiled up at him.
‘Takes practice,’ Ruby said, and she picked up one of the many little bowls that Tilly was dotting about the place and offered it to him. He should have just said no, should have made no comment, or just taken a handful, but he screwed his nose up at the Bombay mix, and maybe her attitude was somehow catching because a teeny, tiny corner of it seemed to have worked its way over to him.
‘I’d rather have some pistachios,’ Cort said, which told her he’d noticed her when he’d walked in.
‘Ah, no.’ Ruby shook her head. ‘They’re not to be put out for the general public, you get the Bombay mix. I’ve hidden my pistachios.’
‘Sensible girl,’ Cort said, and he wanted to pause time for a moment, have a little conversation with himself to ask himself if he was flirting. But he wasn’t, he quickly told himself, because, well, he just didn’t do that and certainly not with student nurses.
‘Not generally.’
‘Sorry?’ He was too busy thinking to keep track of the conversation.
‘I’m not generally considered sensible.’
‘So why?’ Cort asked, when really he shouldn’t, when really he should just leave. ‘Do you feel how I look?’
‘You first,’ Ruby said. ‘Why do you look like you’re about to head off?’
Cort didn’t answer.
‘Why should I tell you what’s upsetting me, only to have you leave five minutes later?’
‘Fair enough,’ Cort said, because what right did he have to ask her what was on her mind when soon he’d be out of there? Anyway, he knew she was in trouble with work, but would that really matter to a flighty little thing like her?
‘How was your holiday?’ It was Ruby’s turn to probe, but she’d been in Emergency for four weeks now and he’d just been there for only one of them.
‘It wasn’t really a holiday,’ Cort said.
‘Oh.’
‘Family.’ Cort certainly wasn’t about to tell her the truth. Hardly anyone at work knew, just his direct boss and a couple of people in Admin, but he had always been private and in this he was intensely so, not just for his sake but for Beth’s.
There really wasn’t that much to talk about anyway. It didn’t feel quite right that he was even here, except he was and he asked her something now about her family, if she was local, but didn’t quite catch her answer and had to lower his head a bit to hear.
‘At Whale Beach,’ Ruby said. ‘About an hour or so from here.’
And he could have lifted his head then—after all, he’d heard now what she had said—except he was terribly aware of the sensation of her face close to his, just as he had been in the suture room.
Something tightened inside Ruby as she inhaled the scent of his hair again, and she was sure, quite, quite sure that if she just stayed still, if she did not move, if she could somehow now not breathe, whatever was in the air between them would turn his mouth those few inches to hers—and she wanted it to.
‘I think I should go.’ Strange that he didn’t lift his head, strange that still he lingered.
‘Hey, Cort…’ He heard his name and turned to see that another mob from Emergency was arriving and he couldn’t believe how close he’d come, how very careless he had almost been, especially as there was motormouth Siobhan too, so for Ruby’s sake he was relieved when she quickly excused herself and slipped away.
Ruby, too, had seen them arriving and a busman’s holiday she did not need, so as they blocked the stairs, talking, Ruby stepped out onto the veranda, her heart hammering just a little bit harder than normal, her lips regretting the absence of Cort’s, and her problems, which she’d momentarily escaped from, caught up with her all over again. She could hear the noise and the throb of the party and decided she would pop over next door tomorrow morning just to check that Mrs. Bennett wasn’t upset about the party. The old lady insisted she didn’t mind a bit, but it was always nice to have a reason to pop over.
Maybe she could talk to her a little, Ruby mused. Mrs. Bennett was so lovely and wise, except…Ruby closed her eyes…nothing any one might say could actually change things. Quite simply, she was terrified to go back to work and terrified of failing too. Sheila’s ominous warning replayed in her mind for perhaps the two hundred and fifty-second time that night.
‘It’s a pass or fail unit, Ruby.’ Sheila was immutable. ‘If you don’t pass, you’ll have to repeat.’
Six more weeks of Emergency was something she could not do. Six more shifts, six more hours, six more minutes was bad enough, but six more weeks was nigh on impossible.
She thought about telling her friends, but she was so embarrassed. They all seemed to be breezing through. Tilly just loved midwifery and Ellie and Jess were loving their studies and placements too. How could she explain that she could very easily chuck it in this minute rather than face going back there tomorrow, let alone having to repeat?
She glanced down towards the beach and thought of the little shop she had worked in for a couple of years, selling jewellery and crystals and candles, and how much safer that had been, yet it hadn’t been quite enough.
She wanted so desperately to do mental health, wanted just to scrape through her emergency rotation so she could go on and study what she truly loved.
And then she saw it.
Hope hung in the sky in the shape of a new moon and Ruby smiled in relief.
‘Please.’ She made her wish. ‘Please get me through A and E. Please find a way for me to get through it.’
Cort walked out and found her standing talking to the sky and not remotely embarrassed at being caught.
‘I was just making my new-moon wishes.’
‘As you do,’ was Cort’s rather dry response, because it would never even have entered his head that as he’d walked along his own beach, just that very morning, he’d made, if not a wish, a promise. ‘’Night, then. I’m off.’
He walked down the path and opened a squeaking gate and had every intention of heading down Hill Street and seeing if there was a taxi—it was his absolute intention, but he found himself turning around. ‘What did you wish for?’
‘You’re not supposed to tell anyone,’ Ruby explained, ‘or it won’t happen…’ She saw his brief nod, knew he would turn to go again, but she also knew that she didn’t want him to. ‘It was a sensible wish, though.’
‘Glad to hear it.’
Keep walking, he told himself, and his legs obeyed, just not in the direction he had intended because he was walking towards her.
‘Why were you crying when we came in?’
‘I wasn’t.’ Instantly she was defensive.
‘Ruby?’
‘Okay—why wouldn’t I be crying? A twenty-three-year-old is almost certainly going to lose his life…he’s my age.’
Cort nodded, because he knew how confronting that could be. Ruby was right, she had every reason to be sitting alone in tears over a patient. ‘Talk to people at work,’ Cort suggested. ‘We’ve got a good team—let them know…’ He saw her eyes shutter, saw her close off, so he decided there was nothing further to be said. She had given him a reason, he’d in turn given advice, except something told him there was more to it than just that.
‘What about Sheila?’ He saw her shrug. ‘Your assessment?’
All he got was silence and he was determined not to break it, just stood till after perhaps a full minute finally she responded.
‘She wants to see an improvement.’
‘In what area?’ Cort asked, and this time he gave in and broke the ensuing silence. ‘How much longer have you got in A and E?’
‘Two weeks. Well, just tomorro
w and Monday, then I’m off for a while and back for three nights the following Monday.’
‘And then?’
‘Then I’m finished,’ Ruby said. ‘Then I start, I suppose— I want to be a mental health nurse.’ As he opened his mouth, she got in first. ‘I know, I know, the staff are as mad as the patients—’ she smiled as she said it ‘—so I’ll fit right in. Really, I’m just biding my time…’
‘Biding your time doesn’t work in A and E,’ Cort said. ‘And Sheila’s tough, but she’s good—listen to her.’
‘I will.’
‘Are you going back in?’ He didn’t like leaving her, didn’t understand why she would rather stand alone in the dark than join her friends.
‘I might just stay out here for a while.’ She thought of Siobhan and Connor and thought of going back in and doing the happy-clappy but she really couldn’t face it. ‘I might just go to bed.’
‘You’re not going to get much sleep with that noise.’
‘It’s not the noise that’ll disturb me. I’ll have Tilly coming up to find out what’s wrong, then Ellie then Jess. It’s just easier to…’ She gave another shrug. ‘I might go for a walk on the beach.’
‘Now, that really would be stupid—walking alone…’
‘Come with me, then.’ He could see the white of her teeth as she spoke, could hear the waves in the background, and for a moment he actually considered it, a bizarre moment because Cort didn’t do midnight walks. Well, he did, but not with company, except he did like talking to her.
‘I don’t think that’s a very good idea.’
‘I think it’s a very good idea,’ Ruby said, because he’d stepped a little bit closer and she didn’t want him to go. Cort had been the only solace in a day that had been horrible, and even if a while ago she had wanted to be alone, it was far, far nicer being here with him. ‘I like walking on the beach.’
Cort Mason - Dr. Delectable Page 3
