Mating Instinct (The COMPLETE Ridgeville Series)

by Kyle, Celia

  “You have a choice: buck the fuck up buttercup, or be a two legged pussy for the rest of your life. People make mistakes and people have shitty parents. Amazingly enough, those people manage to avoid becoming homicidal deviants who end up with a bullet in their head. I mean, just look at Maya’s guards. There’s not a normal one in the bunch. If they can manage not to kill everyone, you can too.”

  The giggles, screams, and yells came nearer, tearing her from Maddy’s lessons and back to the present. The chaotic mass of people drew closer, Harding leading the group toward their home, and Tess pushed away from the window. With a deep breath, she headed to the front door and stood just inside the portal, waiting for everyone to make it to her. Her mate paused at the bottom of the porch steps and shot her a grin. Then their visitors filed past him.

  The group barely even slowed as one Ridgeville Pride member after another filed by. Only…only each of them slowed for a kiss on the cheek, a bruising hug, or a shoulder squeeze. Then, in Neal’s case, she got a kiss, a hug, and a squeeze to her ass along with a “hey darlin’.”

  That caused a roar on one front and a screaming chitter on another.

  Harding strode across the porch, rage etched in every feature, while Carly flew back through the house with obvious, deadly intent.

  Tess was yanked away from the other lion and onto the porch so fast she thought her head would spin, and her mate’s bellow filled her ears. “Mine!”

  She waited for an answering scream from Carly, a similar affirmation of her claim, but got something else entirely.

  “So help me God, I will geld your furry ass and play pool with your balls.” Carly pinched Neal’s ear and twisted.

  “Aw, Lucky, I was just teasing.” Neal whimpered when she tugged on the piece of flesh. Then she led him through the house and toward the backdoor, his whines trailing in their wake.

  The “threat” gone, Harding hugged her close and rubbed his cheek over the top of her head. “Mine.” The touch wandered over her face as he continued nuzzling her. Lips brushed her eyes, nose, lips… “Mine.” And she realized he was scenting her, claiming her in the only way he could at the moment. When he ventured further south to her neck, she tilted her head to the side and granted him access. He growled and nipped where her neck and shoulder met. “Mine. Mine. Mine.”

  Tess stroked his shoulders. “I know. I know.”

  He scraped his fangs over her skin and she shuddered. “All mine.”

  “Yeah, yeah, yours-yours-yours.” Maya’s voice intruded on them. “Can we eat now? I mean, something we can all eat? Something that isn’t Tess’s vagina? ’Cause that looks like where this is going.” Harding growled, and Tess couldn’t suppress her giggle. “What? Just sayin’.” Trust Maya to get to the heart of things.

  The click clack of Maya’s heels on the porch signaled the woman’s retreat, and a small shudder wracked Harding’s body. He took a deep breath and released it on a sigh as tension drained from him.

  “I’m sorry.”

  Tess shook her head. “It’s fine. We’re fine.” She leaned against his chest and listened to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. “I’m the one that’s sorry. You wouldn’t be so on edge—”

  “Hush. It’ll come when it comes. No pressure.” He chuckled. “Just don’t expect me to be too rational when it comes to other men touching you, and you should get used to me having a little more body hair than usual.”

  She furrowed her brows and pulled back to focus on his face. Pale fur did coat his cheeks. “Huh? Why?”

  A pink blush stole across his features. “The cat isn’t quite as patient.” Harding stroked his jaw. “He’s letting me know he’s unhappy the only way he knows how.”

  A block of guilt settled inside her. Yet another thing she’d done wrong. Yet another way she’d hurt the man she was supposed to spend the rest of her life with.

  She believed in Ben’s innocence when all else told her she shouldn’t, which almost got Harding killed. And now she still didn’t trust herself enough to mate with Harding, which lessened the man’s control on his beast.

  “I’m so sorry.” Would there ever be a day when she wouldn’t hurt those around her?

  She wasn’t sure.

  “Nope.” He gave her a quick, chaste kiss. “None of that. We’re having a party. There’s no room for anything but smiles today.”

  “But—”

  Screams interrupted her, the voices a mixture of a deep baritone and high-pitched squeals. And she knew exactly whom they belonged to.

  “No, no, no, no…” The giggles of Easton and Weston grew closer.

  “Damn it, you two, bring that back right now!” Their father did not sound happy.

  “Damn it, Alex, you can’t say damn it!” It seemed the Prima got in on the chase.

  The two fleeing cubs rounded the corner carrying a barbequed hog’s leg between them. “Damn it, damn it, damn it…”

  The twins ran past them, bolting away as Alex came around the house. He stopped at the corner, panting, and Maya slammed into him from behind. “Damn it, Alex, why’d you stop?”

  The twins echoed their mother as they dashed around the opposite end of the cabin. “Damn it, damn it, damn it…”

  Alex growled. “Maya, your children—”

  The Prima stiffened. “My children? How is it that they’re mine when they’re bad? You taught them ‘damn it’, damn it.”

  Tess snickered. She couldn’t help it. The big, bad Prime and Prima were arguing like any other couple. She wanted that. The kids, the arguing, but most important: the love that was obviously shared between the two of them.

  It was then they noticed Tess and Harding’s presence. Maya smiled wide, her anger apparently forgotten, while Alex scowled. A tendril of fear stole into her. She knew it was irrational, knew that Alex wouldn’t hurt anyone without extreme cause, but it was hard to get her body to understand. There was still too much lingering in the past. Someday she’d return a scowl from someone other than her mate with a scowl of her own. Today, she stepped closer to Harding.

  Maya narrowed her eyes at Tess’s action and then turned that glare on Alex. The Prima didn’t hesitate. She popped Alex in the back of the head. “Quit it or Vaginaville will turn into a no fly zone.”

  With that, Alex snared Maya and threw her over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry, smacking her ass for good measure. Her growl was unmistakable, as was the Prime’s answering laugh.

  “Come on, baby. There’s a patch of grass with our names on it.” Alex’s rumbling voice grew softer as he moved away.

  Then it was the two of them once again. Her and Harding. Alone-ish.

  She stared at where the other couple disappeared, remembering the shared looks, the feelings that underlaid their actions. Even through frustration and arguing, love was evident. Maya didn’t hold a hint of fear that her dominant mate would harm her. Hell, she’d even hit him, and the man had merely growled before stalking off and hunting a “piece of grass.”

  When Haring enveloped her in a hug, she leaned into him easily, taking comfort in his presence.

  Tess sighed and rested her head on his chest once again. “I want that.”

  “You want me to toss you over my shoulder and smack your ass?” Harding chuckled and bent down a little, grip shifting until she thought he really would pick her up. “I have no problem with that.”

  She pushed and squirmed, laughing, but not really trying to get away. “No, just…that. I want what they have. Normal.”

  Harding raised an eyebrow.

  “Okay, normal-ish. I mean, she’s fifty shades of crazy, but they love each other.”

  He brushed an errant strand of hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. “Aw, Tess, it’s right here when you’re ready for it.”

  “No,” she shook her head. “I know what you said, but you can’t—”

  A shout from the back yard cut into her objection and she growled. Her inner-whatever didn’t like being interrupted and this was the
third time in a handful of minutes.

  Sensing her frustration, Harding leaned down and did more than give her a chaste kiss. He lured and seduced her with his lips. He traced the seam of her mouth with his tongue, and she opened for him. But instead of conquering, he teased, licking and lapping at her mouth in a mixture of soothing caresses and pure sex.

  By the time he pulled away, she was panting and near begging for more.

  Harding pressed his forehead against hers. “As soon as this party is over, we’ll talk.”

  Another yell for Harding to “hurry his ass up,” and Tess nodded. “When it’s over.”

  * * *

  Four agonizing, dirty, nerve wracking, glorious hours later Tess was happy to see their visitors pile into their SUVs and leave. The house was trashed, the yard was littered with cups, plates and God knew what else, but none of it mattered.

  Because they didn’t hate her.

  The men didn’t entirely understand Tess’s thought process when it came to how she acted with Ben, but the women had put them in their place.

  “It’s not your job to understand. It’s your job to say ‘of course you’re right, honey’. Go on, say it.” Maya had poked Alex with those words and suddenly the Prima was over his shoulder once again.

  She debated on hiring a witch to come over and purify their forest after all of the Prime and Prima’s “activities.”

  Tess stuck another pan beneath the steaming flow of water coming from the faucet and absently washed it. Her gaze remained trained on Harding, his massive form moving across the yard, picking up bits of trash and tossing them into a garbage bag. He’d sent her into the house with a pat on her ass and told her to rest. She’d been through a lot today, he said.

  Emotionally? Yeah, she’d been wrecked, but physically she was fine.

  Hence the dish washing.

  Harding bent over to snare a half-chewed bone and she bit back her moan. The man had a snackable ass.

  “It wasn’t your fault, you know.” The voice was soft and timid, but familiar to her.

  Tess rested the pan on the bottom of the sink and grabbed a nearby dishtowel to dry her hands. She was stalling. A pussy move, but she did it nonetheless.

  “No more than it’s my fault, it’s not yours, Tess.” Still the tenor was gentle, barely a whisper.

  Steeling herself, telling her heart that it needed to stay strong, she turned toward the speaker. And stared into a set of eyes that looked so like…Ben’s. How had she not seen it before? The nose… The eyebrows… The coloring. Ben, Ben and Ben.

  “Millie. No one said you were coming. Did they hook you up with a car? You should have been here earlier. There was a big party and—”

  Millie shook her head. “Don’t do that. Don’t push it off.” The woman was so small, tiny in their large kitchen, but her strength was unmistakable. While her voice might be timid, her rigid posture and the determined gleam in her eyes were anything but. “I can feel how much guilt you’re carrying around about Ben. It’s not healthy.”

  Tears pricked her eyes and she wondered who’d told Millie about Ben. Then she remembered she was looking at a Sensitive, someone who could poke around in people’s heads. “Maybe it’s deserved. Maybe if I’d done something years ago, you wouldn’t have been with Alistair, and then Ben wouldn’t have come looking for you and hurt Harding and then—”

  “And then, and then, and then.” Millie shook her head. “Bad people do bad things. Ben didn’t always have problems. I can’t remember the same way he can. I took after my mother so I’m a cat. I wish he would have gotten help as he grew up. I wish he would have done things differently. But just because he was looking for me doesn’t mean that what he did to Harding is my fault.” Millie took a step deeper into the room and slid onto one of the bar stools. “If I hadn’t been kidnapped, then Ben wouldn’t have come looking for me and hurt Harding. So, am I at fault, too?”

  Tess laughed mirthlessly. “Did you suspect it though? Did you even think for a moment that Ben was the one hurting your mate?”

  “There’s no law against being wrong. No law against wanting to be sure before you implicated a friend.” Pity filled the Sensitive’s eyes, and Tess tore her gaze from the woman. It was the last emotion she wanted directed at her.

  She didn’t deserve it. No matter what anyone said, she’d…

  “Do you ever get tired of being the martyr, Tess?” Millie snapped at her. “Because you’re going to keep beating yourself up over this, and then where will you be? Alone.” This was the first hint of backbone within Millie that she’d ever witnessed. “Enough. Mistakes happen. You have a mate who wants to do nothing more than love you.”

  Tess shook her head in denial, but Millie continued. “Yes, I can feel it from here. He does. So, you don’t have to let go of the guilt, but don’t let it rule you.”

  It sounded so easy.

  “It isn’t easy. It’s hard and it hurts and sometimes you’ll want to die from it, but you can’t let it steal your life.” God, the words were so close to Carly’s, she wondered if Millie plucked them from the bunny’s mind. And she wondered if maybe the women were right.

  Millie reached toward her, and Tess closed the distance between them, sliding her palm over the other woman’s. The moment their skin touched, Millie’s powers filled her, stroked and soothed the ragged edge of her emotions. “You need to let go of your fear, too, Tess.”

  “Millie…”

  “Let me ask you something. Do you think Harding is an abomination? His family did.”

  A growl built in her chest and she tugged against the female’s hold. “Of course not, how dare you say that?”

  “So, if he turns you and you become a white lion, does that make you one? His family will think so.”

  “It’s different,” she snapped. “Alistair was evil.”

  “And Harding might leave the toilet seat up. That doesn’t mean you’ll start doing the same if he Changes you.”

  “It’s different.”

  Millie snorted. Honest to God. The timid, beaten, and abused feline snorted. “It’s not and you know it.” The woman’s gaze bore into hers. “You’re living on fear now, Tess. Let it go. Be happy and mate the man before his balls fall off. You, more than any of us, deserve to be happy.”

  But she didn’t. Not really.

  Did she?

  Millie squeezed her hand and released her, sliding from the stool as she did so. “The greatest revenge you can ever have on him is to live your life and be happy. Ben was your friend and trusting him was a mistake. Alistair was simply evil down to his bones. None of it had a thing to do with you as a person. Your soul isn’t some black void waiting to suck other people in.” Millie sighed. “Live, Tess. Just live.”

  The woman left her, footsteps light, and she strained to hear Millie depart. Eventually, the soft click of the front door reached her, and Tess slumped against the counter, emotionally drained.

  Thoughts tumbled over one another, flickers of her memories overlaying each other as they drifted past.

  Yet, one thing slowly emerged from the tumult in her mind.

  She wanted to live.

  Well, she wanted to mate Harding, too.

  Not necessarily in that order.

  Harding’s heavy stomp on the back porch snared her attention. She turned toward the sound, catching him with her gaze as he stepped over the threshold. He must have seen something in her expression, and a look of concern overtook his features. “Tess?” He inhaled and his nostrils flared. “What was Millie doing here?” He strode toward her and swept her into his arms, holding her close. “You okay?”

  “Yeah. We were just talking.” She reveled in the restrained strength of his body and the gentle way he held her close. “It wasn’t my fault, was it?”

  Harding cupped her face, stroking the soft skin of her cheek. “No, baby.”

  His touch sent a tingle of desire through her, arousal unfurling like a flower opening for the sun. With acceptance came the
ability to feel, really feel. “And if…” She squeezed her eyes shut. “If we mate—”

  “When.”

  “Cocky.” She stuck out her tongue. “If we mate, I won’t turn into him will I?” He opened his mouth, but she cut him off before he could voice his opinion. “No. I won’t. Because I’m not him.”

  “Exactly. You’re Tess. Brave, beautiful, strong Tess. My mate.”

  Tess accepted the words, something deep inside acknowledging that they were true, yet she still wasn’t sure. Guilt had fled at Millie’s words, the woman’s message ringing loud and clear. Except fear ruled her conviction, pushed her away from the idea of becoming Harding’s mate. So, instead of demanding that he bite her, she pulled from his arms and strode toward the hallway. She ignored his scent, the pull of her body toward him, and the need to jump into his arms. Too much had changed, shifted, and tilted in the last fifteen minutes. Too much…

  In the archway, she turned back to him, wincing at the desolation in his gaze. “I need,” she licked her lips. “I’m going to take a nap for a little while.”

  And think.

  And wonder.

  And hope.

  * * *

  The door had barely clicked shut before Harding was on the move and striding toward the guest bedroom. He was drawn to his mate, pulled by an unseen force, and he couldn’t bear being far from her. He’d heard Millie’s words even though he’d pretended surprise at the woman’s presence. And every syllable the female uttered was true.

  It was a matter of Tess believing her.

  Harding strode down the hallway, moving as fast as possible while keeping his steps silent. In seconds he stood before her door, hands braced on the jambs as he leaned toward the solid piece of wood that separated him from his mate. Her scent drifted to him from around the edges of the portal, the sticky sweet honey calling to him like nothing else in the world.

  He wanted to tear the door to shreds, demolish it and scoop his mate into his arms. He’d carry her to his room, strip her bare, and then…