Father by Choice

by Amanda Berry

  She could feel the heat in her cheeks but kept getting things out and ready for lunch. “You’ve been without a phone for nearly two days and you haven’t burst into flames yet.”

  He chuckled and the sound flowed through her. “Like I said, they are competent.”

  “And what brought you to that conclusion?” She lifted her gaze to his and wished she hadn’t. His eyes were soft in the shade of the tree. A pretty deep shade of blue that should seem wrong on a man like Brady, instead sent a pulse of heat through her.

  “I’d rather be here with Amber.” He glanced toward the swings. The chains creaked as Amber went back and forth. When he returned his gaze to hers, she inhaled. “And you.”

  Every unfulfilled wish came rushing back to her. How Brady would come sweeping into their lives at any moment and make things better. How her mother would have been cured and alive today. How Brady would love her.

  But this wasn’t wish time. She needed to remind herself of that and make him show her the truth. She dropped her attention to the food. “I bet you can’t wait to go back to New York and your life.”

  “New York is good.” There was hesitancy in his voice as though he was waiting for her to spring a trap.

  “And your friends.”

  “Sure.” Brady sat up and his attention on her made her wish for things that weren’t real.

  “And your girlfriends.”

  Only the sound of the creaking swing chains and rustle of leaves filled the void after her statement. Her breath caught in her throat, but she forced herself to continue with getting their lunch ready while waiting for his reply.

  “Wow, that’s one big land mine you placed right there.”

  “Excuse me?” She finally lifted her eyes.

  There was a hint of anger in his eyes and God help her, if she didn’t relax a little bit, even as her breathing hitched. Charming Brady might be difficult to manage, but she was used to angry Brady.

  “I already told you that Jules and I aren’t dating,” Brady said carefully, probably negotiating the supposed land mine she’d put out.

  “I know.” She turned to watch Amber happily swinging. Hopefully, now he would tell her that there was someone in New York. That this was all fake and he was going to leave them.

  “I don’t have a girlfriend, nor would I want one in New York. I have enough women in my life currently.” He moved. She didn’t see him move, but her body was in tune with what his did. His warmth drew closer to her. In the coolness of the shade, she longed to relax into him.

  “I’m sure women are ready to toss themselves at you when you return.” She managed to keep her spine straight and her tone even.

  “What about you, Maggie?” His breath tickled the hair at the nape of her neck. Why had she put it up this morning?

  “What about me?” Surely he didn’t think she would fall at his feet. Because even if she believed he cared about Amber enough to stick around or even if he didn’t care, at least felt a sense of obligation to Amber, Maggie wasn’t about to fall into bed with him just because. She respected herself too much to sleep with someone without love. Didn’t she? Okay, in New York, she’d gotten a little carried away, but lust was still lust. And it was intoxicating and tempting and arousing.

  “Anyone in these parts float your boat?” His countrified accent caught her off guard.

  “Float my boat?” Forgetting for the moment that he’d moved close, she turned to him. A breath separated them. A single inhalation would bring her flush against him. His eyes danced with a teasing, seductive light.

  “Isn’t that what the kids are calling it these days?” He gave her a half smile. Apparently, she hadn’t been as off-putting as she’d tried to be.

  It would be so easy to kiss him, but she wasn’t about to let him win this match. “You must be the talk of the town with your pretty words.”

  “I get by.” His head tipped oh so slightly to the left. An invitation if she’d ever seen one. His eyes said, “kiss me, I dare you.” A challenge that she wouldn’t accept if she had half a brain.

  “I choose to keep it in my pants, as they say.” She gave him a tight smirk but didn’t pull away like she should. It was like waving your hand over a flame. The closer you got to the wick the more danger there was of burning yourself, the higher the rush.

  He glanced down. “That’s a shame.”

  When he didn’t look up right away, she followed his gaze. Her top gaped slightly from her turned position on the blanket, giving Brady a nice view of her cleavage and hints of the red bra she’d put on this morning.

  He returned to look at Maggie. All the teasing was gone and his eyes were like the tropical ocean, warm and inviting. “Maggie, I—”

  “Daddy, look how high I can swing.”

  For a breath he stayed where he was. She swore she saw something in his eyes that she’d never seen before. Something she wasn’t sure she was ready to understand. The next breath he stood and walked over to Amber, shouting encouragement. She stared at him trying to decipher everything that had been said, and that look.

  He had been nothing but sweet and charming this morning until she’d tried to pick a fight. He’d even turned that around on her. Every time they got close, it seemed as if the fire between them had only been smoldering and waiting for him to come closer so she could burst into flames. She had hoped that familiarity would dampen their lust. The day-to-day grind usually had that effect on relationships. Instead, the tension wound tighter and tighter. He didn’t seem any less interested than he had in New York. In fact, he seemed more interested.

  He glanced at her and caught her gaze. What had he been about to tell her? His lips curved into a smile. Her breathing hiccupped. Maggie swallowed. This day needed to end, because she was getting closer and closer to throwing herself at him.

  “Time for lunch,” she yelled.

  Brady helped Amber slow the swing. Their laughter combined to make a perfect melody of sound. He wasn’t here for Maggie. He was here for Amber. To get to know her, not Maggie. The tension eased out of her body. This was what she wanted for Amber. A father who loved her.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Maggie stood in the kitchen, staring out the window. Amber had insisted that Brady be the one to tuck her in tonight. Which probably meant conning him into reading her multiple books before bed.

  Their picnic had gone off without a hitch. In the afternoon they’d spent a little time at Penny’s with Flicker and then went grocery shopping, of all things. Maggie had been amazed by what Brady remembered from his days of working on the farm. He’d kept them both entertained with little stories about him and his brothers.

  Amber had definitely fallen in love with her father, and Maggie couldn’t blame her. Brady had proven today that he was still that boy she’d had a crush on in school. But he’d also shown her that the grown-up Brady was even better with more substance and a way of viewing the world that had to do with life and experience that neither of them had had eight years ago. Crushing on teenage Brady had been easy, but grown-up Brady made her feel unsettled.

  “Deep thoughts?”

  She spun around. Even knowing he couldn’t read her mind, she felt vulnerable. As if she were latching onto an idea of what it would be like to do something insane like fall in love. With Brady.

  “Did Amber go to sleep okay?” She had to find something to busy herself with. The dishes were done and put away. Everything was clean. Unless she wanted to pull out the oven cleaner and a scrubbing pad, there wasn’t anything left.

  “After five books.” His smile was tender, as if he would read Amber a hundred books if she asked him to. “She was practically asleep when she asked for the fifth one. I made sure to read very slowly.”

  “Great.” Oh crap, now what?

  He looked as if he had absolutely nowhere to be. It was only eight-thirty. Maybe she should pretend to be tired and ask him to leave. She could watch some TV or work a little or...

  “Do you want a drink?” M
aggie blurted out. She had to say something, and everything else sounded rude after the day they’d spent together and especially last night with Amber. Besides, he just stood there watching her with a look that made her stomach flutter.

  “Sure.” His gaze never strayed from her as she went to the fridge.

  She opened it and pushed things aside to see what she had. “I have some milk and juice boxes and water and a couple of cans of Diet Coke hidden near the back. Sorry, I don’t normally have adult company besides Penny. So no real reason to drink.”

  But damn, could she use a drink about now.

  “Water’s fine.” His baritone voice made her knees tremble.

  She straightened and closed the fridge. With a forced smile, she walked over to the sink and flipped on the faucet to cool the water. “Water it is, then.”

  Her hands shook when she reached for the glasses. His hand curved around hers as his warmth engulfed her back. It would be so easy to go wherever this led them.

  “Let me help you with that,” Brady whispered next to her ear.

  Shivers coursed along her spine, pooling into an empty pulsing between her legs. It was only lust. His other arm crossed her waist and pulled her tight against him. His hardness settled against her backside, leaving no doubt where his thoughts were.

  Their hands closed over the glass, and he moved it to the stream of water. While the glass filled, his lips caressed the back of her neck. She forgot to think, to breathe as she succumbed to the desire that hummed to life whenever he was near.

  He took the glass from her hand and set it on the counter before shutting off the faucet. Turning in his arms, Maggie met his gaze. His pupils were dilated. His breath shaky.

  “No more games, Maggie.” His fingers tipped up her chin as his mouth descended. There was no denying the chemistry between them.

  His lips parted on hers, and she gave herself up to the feel of his mouth. The slide of his tongue against hers. The passion she’d been denying all week rose to the surface all at once. The kiss turned desperately passionate. She didn’t want to think anymore, only touch him and let him touch her.

  She pulled his T-shirt loose from his pants. Her greedy fingers found their way under to memorize the ripples of flesh beneath. As long as she kissed him, she wouldn’t have to think, only feel.

  Brady’s hands had found their own way under her top, curving around her back before lifting her onto the counter. Not for one second did he release her mouth, and she didn’t give him the chance.

  It’s as if they both knew if they paused for one moment, reality would come crashing in. His fingertips traced a path of fire beneath her shirt, making her skin tremble, anticipating his touch. She wanted to live in this moment. To ignore the warning bells going off in her head.

  His lips trailed down her chin and his teeth grazed her throbbing pulse in her neck. The upper cabinets bumped against her head. No thinking. Thinking wasn’t allowed.

  But the kitchen? Not the best place in a house with kids.

  “We...” she said.

  His tongue found a spot on her neck that was as close to divinity as she had ever come. Even her toes curled in response to the flood of longing. Okay, just a second more and she’d stop.

  The button of her jeans opened. Then she felt the tug of the zipper.

  “Brady?” She tried again to be responsible, but his name came out as a soft moan.

  His lips curved into a smile against her neck. He knew she was weak. Captured by his spell. Unable to untangle her thoughts long enough to think about Amber walking in on them.

  That did it. She shoved against his chest and was surprised it actually moved him. His eyes were almost black and had that dazed look that she knew was reflected in hers. Their chests moved in time as they drew in much-needed air.

  “We can’t do this here,” she finally managed to say.

  “Maggie, you’re killing me.” His head dropped to her shoulder. His dark hair tickled her skin, keeping the fire on high.

  “Brady, look at me.” It was about time he actually heard her.

  He raised his head and met her eyes before his gaze dropped to her lips. She felt a corresponding tug deep inside. There was no way she was turning him out tonight.

  “Not here.” She reached out and tipped his chin until he met her eyes again. “Not in the kitchen. Amber might wake up.”

  His eyes glowed like a child’s at Christmas. “Well, why didn’t you say so?”

  He swung her into his arms before she could make any comment and strode across the kitchen and up the stairs. She patted his arm until he lowered her softly to the floor in the hallway. Grabbing his hand and hoping for the best, she led him past Amber’s door and into her room.

  He towered over her and walked her backward until the bed hit her knees. She grabbed his shirt as she lowered herself to the bed. He followed willingly. His lips met hers and banished the other thoughts that had bubbled forth.

  “Condom?” she mumbled against his lips.

  He pulled out his wallet and withdrew a condom, placing it on the nightstand along with his wallet.

  “The door?” She had to cover all the bases while she was still coherent enough.

  “Shut and locked.” He nibbled her bottom lip before kissing her senseless.

  The sense of urgency took over again as she pulled his shirt over his head. She could ignore the little warning bell going off in the back of her mind. Especially when his mouth was doing divine things to her neck. It didn’t matter that they hadn’t discussed where they were going from here.

  It hadn’t mattered before, why should it matter now? Her shirt followed his to the floor. His warm skin rubbed against hers, and breathing became optional. She fell against the bed as his lips worked magic along her collarbone. Her stomach clenched as he worked his way closer and closer to her breasts, which were confined by her bra.

  Why shouldn’t she be allowed this? So what if he’d be gone in a week? Shouldn’t she enjoy what she could, like Penny always said?

  His hands slipped beneath her and released the catch on her bra. With it out of the way, his mouth covered her nipple and she got her wish. Nothing but sensation flowed through her brain. He branded her with his mouth as his hands worked on her pants.

  Want and need replaced everything. As his hands continued to explore her body, she nearly came off the bed when he switched breasts.

  A small knock broke through the chaos of sensations. It was probably the house settling. Brady’s finger teased her panty line.

  Another knock followed by a small “Mommy?” had Maggie slamming her hand over Brady’s and shoving him to the side. She took three deep breaths before grabbing a shirt and throwing it over her head.

  “Just a minute.” Suddenly, she was engulfed in Brady’s rich scent. She had grabbed his shirt, still warm from his body. She held her finger to her lips when she looked at Brady.

  He nodded.

  Opening the door a crack, she saw Amber’s face covered in tears. Forgetting everything, Maggie dropped to her knees and held out her arms. Amber flew into them, wrapping her arms tight around Maggie’s neck.

  “I...had a bad...dream,” Amber said through her sniffles. Her arms stayed tight around Maggie and her head lay on Maggie’s shoulder.

  Maggie rubbed her back. Perhaps this was the universe saying don’t sleep with Brady Ward. “It’s okay. Why don’t we go to your room and get you into bed?”

  Amber’s head shook violently on Maggie’s shoulder. “I want to sleep with you, Mommy. In your bed.”

  Danger. Maggie tried to glance at Brady, but her head wouldn’t turn far enough. Maybe he’d hidden in the closet. He could sneak out after Amber fell asleep.

  “Can I call Daddy?”

  No matter how many times Amber called him that, it shocked Maggie. She didn’t know quite how to answer. After all, Brady was right there. No need for a phone call.

  She wanted to laugh hysterically but instead her mouth opened and closed whil
e she tried to think of some reason Amber couldn’t call Brady besides the fact that he was in Maggie’s bedroom.

  “No need to call me. I’m here.” Brady opened the door all the way and knelt beside Maggie. She cringed. What would Amber think?

  Amber immediately released Maggie and flung herself at Brady. A stab of jealousy hit Maggie hard. She’d always been the one to comfort Amber. The one Amber clung to when she needed a good cry. The one Amber relied on to keep her safe.

  And now Brady was hogging her glory. Not that she wanted Amber to have bad dreams. She just wanted to be the one her daughter wanted to comfort her.

  “What happened to your shirt?” Amber asked. She snuggled up to Brady the same way she always snuggled with Maggie.

  “Your mom was cold.” Brady glanced Maggie’s way. How could she begrudge him this when he looked so damned happy?

  “That was nice of you.” Amber pulled away and smooshed Brady’s face between her hands, forcing him to look at her. “Would you stay and sleep with Mommy and me?”

  “Of course.” Brady didn’t hesitate for a moment.

  What the hell was going on in her life? First she about had sex with Brady and now she was about to climb in bed with him and their daughter? This was too weird.

  Amber grabbed both their hands and led them to the bed. She climbed in and under the covers. “Mommy on this side and Daddy over here.”

  Not an ounce of the heat from before was in the look Brady gave her. It was questioning and tender. Almost as if he was giving her a choice. Oh, sure, Amber would blame her for driving Brady away.

  Maggie shrugged and grabbed a pair of pajama bottoms from her dresser. After pulling them on, she climbed into bed with Amber.

  “I don’t even get my shirt back?” Brady smiled.

  “I’m still cold.” Maggie snuggled deeper under the covers. That, and it smelled like him. “If you aren’t going to be comfortable, you could always go home.”

  “Wouldn’t dream of it.” He sat on the edge of the bed and took off his socks, but kept his jeans on. He lay on top of the covers, put his arms under his head and crossed his ankles.