Small-Town Mom

by Jean C. Gordon

  “Why would I want to do that? What good will it do?”

  A moment of silence answered her. “I can come over anyway, so you don’t have to wait alone.”

  Fatigue overwhelmed her, making the phone receiver feel like a lead weight in her hand. “No, I’ll be all right. Call me as soon as you have news.” She clicked off and heaved the phone at the opposite end of the couch. “No, not again. Not Myles. Eli said he’d bring him home.” Eli. Grief for what she feared most—the loss of him and Myles—seared her, and she dissolved in tears.

  A voice from the past, the voice of the chaplain at Fort Drum, broke through the red haze. So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you. Deuteronomy 31:6. The chaplain had been reassuring the wife of a newly deployed recruit at their spousal Bible study.

  She could see Eli embracing these words, as she once had. He had as perfect a faith as she’d ever seen. He’d spoken his heart when he’d said they’d be home. She longed to give her fears to a higher power, to lean on one stronger than her. She realized that Eli had tried to give her some of that strength. But he’d be the first to say that any strength he had to give came from above. Could she draw on that strength? Did she still have it in her? Or had her bitterness killed all of her faith, as she’d let herself believe?

  Sinking to her knees, she prayed, “Dear Lord, even if only for tonight, allow me back into Your flock so that I might see my way again. And, even though I’m unworthy to ask anything of You, I know You’ll hear my prayer for Eli and Myles and the other kids to be safe tonight.”

  A knock at the door brought Jamie to her feet. She looked out to see Anne and opened the door.

  “I couldn’t leave you alone,” Anne said.

  “Come in.” Jamie closed the door and took Anne’s coat. Her friend’s kindness in coming even though Jamie had rebuffed her earlier offer threatened to trigger another torrent of tears. “If you’re still willing to stay with the girls, I’d like to go join the other parents at the prayer vigil.”

  “Oh, Jamie.” Anne hugged her. “Of course my offer is still open. The snow has let up a lot, but drive carefully, and God bless.”

  Jamie hugged her back, fervently hoping for the last.

  She walked into the church hall and Tanner’s mother, Clare, rushed to her, followed by Patrick and Charlie at a more hesitant gait. Jamie hugged them all.

  “Jennifer is waiting to hear from Pastor Joel again,” Clare said. “When she talked with him about fifteen minutes ago, he and Neal had found the spot where the van had gone off the road and the mountain rescue team had just arrived.”

  “So, you haven’t heard… You don’t know?” Jamie stumbled putting the words together into a cohesive question.

  “Come and join us in the prayer circle,” Patrick said.

  Clare touched her arm. “You don’t have to if it makes you uncomfortable. We understand.”

  Jamie thought of the numerous invitations to come to service and church functions that Clare had offered over the past months. “I’d like to. Very much.”

  An aura of hope and peace enclosed her as she took her place in the circle and joined hands with Clare and Charlie. As she prayed with the others, Jamie more fully realized what she already knew in her heart. The military and Eli by association weren’t the enemy. As tonight was proving, everyday life could be as dangerous. Nor was trust in others or God or church her enemy. Not trusting in any of them was her scapegoat to allow her not to accept life and live it to the fullest. Thank You, Lord, for leading me from the wilderness.

  The phone on the wall near the kitchen rang and everyone turned to look at it. Jennifer answered. “Hello. Yes, yes. Praise the Lord.” She hung up and turned to the parents. “The rescue squad has them all out. There doesn’t seem to be any life-threatening injuries. They’re taking them to the Adirondack Medical Center in Saranac Lake to be checked out by the emergency room doctors, though, just to be safe.”

  “Amen!” one of the fathers said.

  The parents made the hour drive to Saranac Lake in a car caravan. Jamie prayed the whole time that the information Jennifer had gotten was right.

  * * *

  Eli spotted Jamie as soon as she walked into the waiting room to await her turn to talk with the doctor. He hung back out of her line of vision. Tonight’s experience, more than any he’d had in combat, brought home how precious life was when you loved someone. As he watched Jamie, he longed to take her into his arms and tell her how much he loved her. He couldn’t think of anything he’d rather do than spend the rest of his life doing his best to love and protect her and her family.

  But he’d failed her. He’d put her son in danger, and he’d put himself in danger. He had no right to insinuate himself in her life. Eli didn’t know how Jamie had coped with losing her husband. Before the rescue squad had arrived, when their fate was uncertain, he thought of not seeing her again and the pain was indescribable. He was a fool. He’d thought to give her strength to lean on. She was far stronger than him.

  “Ms. Glasser,” the nurse called Jamie into the emergency room. A couple of minutes later she emerged, arm around Myles, smiling.

  Eli had thought Myles was fine, but it lightened his heart to have that confirmed. He rose to slip out the back door. His apologies would be better made later, in private.

  “Where do you think you’re going, buster?” Jamie’s voice stopped him.

  Although he’d rather have her make the break privately, if she needed to do it here, he could take it like a man.

  He pasted a smile on his face. “Myles is all right?”

  “He’s fine.” She turned to her son. “Why don’t you help Tanner’s mother get him to her car? Crutches are tricky until you get the hang of them.”

  Myles left and Eli had to face Jamie alone.

  “Did you really think you were going to sneak out of this hospital without talking to me?”

  “That was the idea,” he admitted.

  She led him to an alcove off the waiting room. “Thank you.”

  “You’re thanking me?”

  “I trusted you to bring Myles home safe and you did. Myles told me how you kept everyone calm and under control until the emergency squad got there. How you led them in prayer and made him feel confident he’d get out okay. Then, how you worked right along with the rescuers until everyone was out of the van and up on the road.”

  “I did what I was able to do. But I didn’t do it alone.”

  “I know. You did it with God’s help. I realized tonight that in order to trust anything, anyone, I have to trust our Lord first.”

  “Oh, Jamie.” He pulled her into his arms. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too.”

  He held her close, feeling her heart beat against his chest, and kissed her with every ounce of love he had in him. He lifted his head. “I can’t describe the terror I felt when I thought I might not see you again.” He took a deep breath. “I want to keep seeing you. I like having you and your family in my life.”

  Jamie smiled at him, her eyes half-shuttered. “I think that could be arranged.” She ran her finger down the side of his chin. “On a couple conditions.”

  “And what might those conditions be?”

  “You don’t try to regiment my life and you allow me to be late every now and then.”

  He rested his hands on her waist. “You’re a hard taskmaster, but I’m up to the assignment. Now, I’d better walk you out before Myles starts wondering where we are.”

  “Let him wonder.” She reached up and pulled his head down and kissed him.

  * * * * *

  Keep reading for an excerpt from Plain Admirer by Patricia Davids

  Epilogue

  Jamie bent her head and breathed the sweet smell of her rose bouquet. Lord, thank You for Your patience with me and for bringing Eli into my life and me back into Your loving family.


  The organ chord sounded signaling the start of the procession. Anne, her matron of honor, turned and smiled at her as Rose and Opal started down the aisle.

  “Mommy!” Opal turned and said in a loud stage whisper that echoed through the church. “When the wedding is over, can I call Mr. Payton Daddy or do I still have to call him Mr. Payton?” Laughter rippled through the church.

  “I think he would love for you to call him Daddy,” Jamie said. “Now go back up with Rose.”

  Jamie’s father bent down and whispered in her ear. “Eli’s a good man. I hope he recognizes all of the treasures he’s getting.” Her father raised his chin toward Rose and Opal, now halfway down the aisle, and Myles standing at the altar rail.

  Her gaze traveled from Myles to Neal to the spot where Eli should be standing. He wasn’t there. Why would they have started the procession? Her heart stopped. Eli was never late.

  Anne touched her arm. “It’s okay. He’s here. The guys played a trick on him. Last night at the bachelor party, Pastor Joel got ahold of Eli’s watch on some pretext and set it back. And Leah did the same with the clocks at his place.”

  Jamie’s giggle was stopped short by Eli rushing in the side door, resplendent in Air Force dress uniform.

  Her gaze locked with his, and the love reflected in his eyes filled her heart to bursting. She walked down the aisle on her father’s arm, oblivious to everything but Eli standing military-straight in front of the altar. When she stepped beside Eli, he took her hand in his and squeezed, strong and firm.

  “Ready?” Pastor Joel whispered.

  Eli dropped his gaze to Jamie’s upturned face and gave a decisive nod.

  “Yes,” she whispered back, holding Eli’s gaze. And she was. Ready to give all her love to the man beside her. Ready, with Eli by her side, to face and accept whatever God might have in store for them.

  * * * * *

  Keep reading for an excerpt from Plain Admirer by Patricia Davids

  Dear Readers,

  Welcome back to Paradox Lake for widow Jamie Glasser’s story. If you read Small-Town Dad, you’ll recall that Jamie was manning the home-front waiting for her husband to return from duty in Afghanistan. He never made it home, and now Jamie has turned away from her faith and anything military. So who does God put in her path at every turn? Retired Air Force Lt. Colonel Eli Payton—youth group leader and Sunday school teacher at Jamie’s former church and Jamie’s troubled son’s high school guidance teacher.

  The inspiration for Small-Town Mom came from a prayer we say at our church every week for our nation’s men and women in uniform. Not coming from a military background, it was a challenge to write. I hope you’ll find reading it as rewarding as I found writing it.

  Please feel free to email me at JeanCGordon@yahoo.com or snail mail me at PO Box 113, Selkirk, NY 12158. You can also visit me at Facebook.com/JeanCGordon.author, JeanCGordon.com or Tweet me at @JeanCGordon.

  Blessings,

  Jean C. Gordon

  Questions for Discussion

  Have you ever had an event in your life that pushed your faith to its limits?

  What did you do?

  Why do you think Jamie was unable to hold on to her faith after her husband was killed?

  Could Eli have done more to bring Jamie back closer to God? What?

  If Jamie were your friend, what would you have done to help her?

  Do you agree or disagree with Jamie’s reasoning for allowing her son Myles to attend confirmation classes. Why or why not?

  How do you think Eli’s childhood and military career colored his first impressions of Jamie?

  Do you think those impressions were justified in any way? Why or why not?

  Is Eli’s military background a positive or negative factor in his working with teenagers at school and church?

  Do you think Jamie overreacted to Charlotte Russell’s behavior toward her and Eli? Why or why not?

  How well do you think Eli handled the situation? Why?

  At what point would you have been able to forgive Charlotte?

  Have you ever had something you’d done when you were younger come back and cause problems later?

  Do you think Jamie was right in vocalizing her resistance to having representatives of the Armed Forces at Career Day, even though she knew the other committee members would disagree with her?

  Was Eli out of line talking to Myles about Eli and Jamie’s budding relationship without talking with her first?

  Do you think Jamie would have found her way back to God and Community Church without Eli’s example?

  We hope you enjoyed this Harlequin Love Inspired story.

  You believe hearts can heal. Love Inspired stories show that faith, forgiveness and hope have the power to lift spirits and change lives—always.

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  Chapter One

  “This isn’t easy to say, but I have to let you go, Joann. I’m sure you understand.”

  “You’re firing me?” Joann Yoder faced her boss across the cluttered desk in his office. For once, she wasn’t tempted to straighten up for him. And she didn’t understand.

  “Ja. I’m sorry.”

  Otis Miller didn’t look the least bit sorry. Certainly not as sorry as she was to be losing a job she really needed. A job she loved. Why was this happening? Why now, when she was so close to realizing her dream?

  She’d only been at Miller Press for five months, but working as an assistant editor and office manager at the Amish-owned publishing house was everything she’d ever wanted. How could it end so quickly? If she knew what she had done wrong, she could fix it. “At least tell me why.”

  He sighed heavily, as if disappointed she hadn’t accepted her dismissal without question. “You knew when you came over from the bookstore that this might not be a permanent position.”

  Joann had moved from a part-time job at the bookstore next door to help at the printing shop after Otis’s elder brother suffered a heart attack. When he passed away a few weeks later, Joann had assumed she would be able to keep his job. She loved gathering articles for their monthly magazine and weekly newspaper, as well as making sure the office ran smoothly and customers received the best possible attention. She dropped her gaze to her hands clenched tightly in her lap and struggled to hang on to her dignity. Tears pricked the back of her eyelids, but she refused to cry. “You told me I was doing a good job.”

  “You have been. Better than I expected, but I’m giving Roman Weaver your position. I don’t need to tell you why.”

  “Nee, you don’t.” Like everyone in the Amish community of Hope Springs, Ohio, she was aware of the trouble that had visited the Weaver family. She hated that her compassion struggled so mightily with her desire to support herself. This job was proof that her intelligence mattered. She might be the “bookworm” her brothers had often called her, but here she had a chance to put her learning to good use. Now it was all being taken away.

  She couldn’t let it go without a fight. She looked up and blurted, “Does he really need the job more than I do?”

  Otis didn’t like conflict. He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms across his broad chest. “Roman has large medical bills to pay.”

  “But the church held an auction to help raise money for him.”

  “He and his family are grateful for all the help they received, but they are still struggling.”

  She’d lost, and she knew it. Only a hint of the bitterness she felt slipped through in her words. “Plus, he’s your nephew.”

  “That, too,”
Otis admitted without any sign of embarrassment. Family came only after God in their Amish way of life.

  Roman Weaver had had it rough, there was no denying that. It was a blessing that he hadn’t lost his arm after a pickup truck smashed into his buggy. Unfortunately, his damaged left arm was now paralyzed and useless. She’d seen him at the church meetings wearing a heavy sling and heard her brothers say the physical therapy he needed was expensive and draining his family’s resources.

  Her heart went out to him and his family, but why should she be the one to lose her job? There were others who worked for Miller Press.

  She didn’t bother to voice that thought. She already knew why she had been chosen. Because she was a woman.

  Joann had no illusions about the male-dominated society she lived in. Unmarried Amish women could hold a job, but they gave it up when they married to make a home for their husband and children. A married woman could work outside the home, but only if her husband agreed to it.

  Amish marriage was a partnership where each man and woman knew and respected their roles within the Ordnung, the laws of their Amish church. Men were the head of the household. Joann didn’t disagree with any of it. At least, not very much.

  It was just that she had no desire to spend the rest of her life living with her brothers, moving from one house to another and being an unwanted burden to their families. She’d never had a come-calling boyfriend, although she’d accepted a ride home from the singings with a few fellas in her youth. She’d never received an offer of marriage. And at the advanced age of twenty-six, it wasn’t likely she would.

  Besides, there wasn’t anyone in Hope Springs she would consider spending the rest of her life with. As the years had gone by, she’d begun to accept that she would always be a maiden aunt. Maybe she’d get a cat one day.

  Otis folded his hands together on his desk. “I am sorry, Joann. Roman needs the job. He can’t work in the sawmill with only one good arm. It’s too dangerous.”