Survivor (First to Fight Book 2)

by Nicole Blanchard

  I think about Damian’s smug face and wish I’d known.

  I could have saved her from this horror.

  Then again, I hadn’t been there to save Sofie either.

  Present

  MY LITTLE CAR shakes beneath me as I max out the speed on the highway to get to the hospital. When I get there the E.R. is packed, so I stop a passing nurse. “The girl who was attacked? Was there a man with her?”

  “I’m sorry, miss, but I really can’t say.”

  I growl and turn in a circle. Spotting a familiar dark head through the double doors, I barrel past a nurse and bang on the pane of glass. “Jack!” I say.

  His head shoots up, and the first thing I notice is he looks like complete crap.

  There’s blood on his shirt.

  I have to grip the handle to the locked door to keep from going down on the white linoleum. His eyes widen in alarm and he lunges for the door, grabbing ahold of my shoulders. “Sofie, what the hell?”

  “You’re bleeding?” I say dumbly, fingering the stains on his shirt and noting his unsteady hands. “Are you hurt?”

  “No, I—” his voice breaks and he swallows. “It’s not mine,” he says.

  “When you called me my first thought …I thought it was Damian. It’s stupid, I know, but—”

  “It’s not stupid. He did…hurt someone.”

  My heart sinks like a stone to the bottom of my stomach. “Oh, God.”

  “She was, she is,” he corrects, “a friend. We dated for a while last year.”

  I close my eyes. “This is my fault. I could have done something to stop him from being released from jail. I should have hacked his files, fucked with his probationary hearings. I almost did it, but then I thought, wouldn’t that make me as bad as him? Is there a line of good versus bad you just shouldn’t cross? Does one misstep make you a horrible human being? I guess the fact that I could have stopped him from hurting another person is proof enough.”

  “This isn’t your fault,” he says. “This was for me.”

  I frown. “For you?”

  “She said it was a message meant for me.” His eyes dart around the waiting room like an animal searching for an escape. “Can we get out of here? I don’t want to be here right now.”

  “Yeah, yeah, let’s go home. The boys decided to stay the night at their friend’s house again and grab a ride to the game tomorrow. You can come to my house. It’ll be quiet there. We can take my car.”

  It was a change of roles for me to be comforting him and not the other way around. We’re both quiet as I lead him out of the emergency room and to my car. It’s ridiculously small for his long legs, but he folds up in the passenger seat without a protest and doesn’t say a word until we get back to my house.

  “Do you mind if I take a shower and change? I left some clothes here when I was cleaning up for your mom.”

  “I’ll start your shower while you go grab them, if you want.”

  “You don’t have to wait on me.”

  “If you could see your face, you wouldn’t be saying that. You’re as white as a ghost.”

  He pauses in the front doorway, his hands flexing against his side and I recognize it as a fighter on the edge, priming to face his opponent, and I have the fleeting thought, is that opponent the monster that did this…or me? Or are they one and the same?

  He turns without responding and disappears into the house to hunt down his clothes. I don’t bother arguing with him and start the shower anyway, needing to keep my mind and hands busy. Too much time to think and I’ll remember he’s still out there. Hunting. Waiting. Maybe even searching for his next prey.

  Sneakers squeak against the hardwood and then I feel his hard chest against my back. “For a second, I thought she was you. I pictured you there at seventeen and alone. Wanting your family to be there. Wanting me to stay with you, fight for you. And I just walked away.”

  “Jack—”

  “I just left you to deal with it on your own. He hurt you. God only knows how, and I let you go.” His lips course down my hair. “I’ll never forgive myself for abandoning you that way.”

  “I’m fine,” I insist, as his hands wrap around my stomach. His heart beats a wild tattoo I can feel in my own chest.

  “Because you’re the strongest woman I know.”

  Shaking my head, I say, “I’m not. I ran away. From you, from my family. I gave up everything that mattered to me.”

  “He took everything that mattered, and you picked up the pieces and fit them back together the best way you knew how.”

  “I don’t know where you get this vision of me, but I’m not the person you think I am.”

  He starts undressing behind me. I hear the rustle of his clothes as they plop on the tile floor at my feet. “No, you’re not. You’re better.”

  He starts undressing me, too. First my prim button-up, then my pencil skirt. I toe out of my heels—for the first time, I don’t care where they land. Then he helps me under the hot spray with him, tucking me under his chin as we stand, locked against each other until the water turns cold.

  Jack gets out of the shower first, wrapping a towel around his waist and holding one out for me to step into. He wraps me up like a child and leads us both back to my bedroom, where the curtains blot out the dim evening sunlight, draping the room in shadows. Pulling me to the bed, he drops both of our towels to the floor and wraps us up in blankets until we’re skin against skin in a cocoon.

  “I want you to talk to her,” he says, his voice hoarse with sleep and emotion.

  “To the girl?”

  “Her name’s Emma. She could use the support, I think. I don’t know. Either way, I think it’ll be good for both of you. I want her to file a report.”

  I sit straight up in the bed, my heart pumping viciously. “And you want me to what? Provide additional evidence? A key eyewitness?”

  “Yes, to all of those. You both need it.”

  “And who are you to tell us what we need?”

  “I’m the man who’s seen the damage it’s done. To both of you.” He turns flat on his back and runs a hand through his hair. “I just want you to talk to someone. Logan’s still on leave, but we can consult with him to see what steps to take. Emma’s scared, but I think if she had you, she’d be up to visiting the police.”

  “There’s nothing they can do to help me now, Jack. Too much time has passed.”

  He props himself up on one arm. “Yeah, but there is something you can do to help her. I wasn’t there for you when you were attacked, but I can do this. We can do this.”

  I recline on the bed, my arms rigid by my sides as he watches me. “I don’t know. I’m not saying no, I just…can I think about it?”

  He presses a kiss to my shoulder. “Of course.”

  Silence descends between us until I can’t stand it any longer. “Did you want to go with me to the boys game tomorrow? With everything that happened today, I forgot to mention it.”

  “Damn right I will. Who do you think taught Rafe that jump shot?”

  Shivering, I give in and burrow into his warmth. “I’m glad you’re here.”

  He answers with a kiss against my forehead. “I’m not going anywhere,” he says.

  For the first time since Jack started staying over at my house I don’t sleep well. I keep expecting to wake up and find Damian’s haunting face leering over me. We’re both quiet as we make the drive to Ben and Livvie’s house.

  He follows close behind me, one hand on my back. I take comfort in that. In knowing he’s right behind me.

  Cole opens the door and throws himself into my arms with a screech as soon as I knock. “Auntie Sofie!”

  His smiling face puts a grin on my own. “Hi, handsome. Is your mommy home?”

  Ben comes around the corner with a hassled look on his face. “Please, dear God tell me you’re here to take one of these runts off of our hands. Seriously, at this point, I’ll pay you if you want one.”

  I pat Ben on the face and la
ugh. “Do you mean this kid or your wife?”

  He pauses to consider while Cole frowns at him, looking remarkably like his father. “Well, I was thinking about keeping the older one, but if you’ll take the brat with you, then by all means.”

  “Dad!” Cole stomps his foot. “Auntie Sofie is here to take me to the basketball game with Rafe and Donnie.”

  “And I’m here to recruit you to help with wrangling the team,” Jack says from beside me. “Apparently, it’s our turn to help out.”

  “Ah,” Ben says. “Go get your mom, spawn, and tell her to put a move-on.”

  “I’m standing right here, Ben. I’m not deaf.” She rolls her eyes at me as Ben pecks her on the cheek anyway and joins Jack at the truck to finish loading some supplies he’s apparently been keeping in the shed.

  “How’s life?” I ask Livvie as she joins us on the porch.

  “Screw that, I want to hear about what’s going on with you and Jack. Can I expect a sister-in-law in the near future?” She wiggles her eyebrows.

  We head over to her patio furniture and I take a seat, my stomach suddenly fluttering with nerves.

  Livvie’s brows draw up and her smile melts away. “So what’s up? I was just joking about the sister-in-law thing. I know you’re trying to be friends.”

  I swallow dryly. “Welllll,” I drag out the word, unable to help my smile. I haven’t really had time to enjoy it, but the flutters in my stomach are undeniable.

  Livvie squeals and kicks her feet. “Hot damn. I told Ben the other day that it was only a matter of time. I want details. I know it didn’t happen the day you were sick, so spill.”

  “Thanks for that, by the way. I’ll remember that the next time that you want babysitting.”

  She waves that away. “Totally worth it.”

  My mood sobers. “To tell you the truth, there is something we need to talk about.”

  I relay the details of that night, the reason why I broke up with Jack, and the photo that brought us back together. Throughout my story, the smile on her face disappears and tears soon start rolling down her cheeks. She scoots her chair closer to mine until her arms are wrapped around my neck. I finish the last horrible bit into her hair. We hold each other for a few minutes and I realize how lucky I am to have such a great friend.

  “I’m so sorry you had to go through that alone. I should have been there with you. I encouraged you to go.” Her voice hitches with unshed tears.

  “This wasn’t your fault, Liv. And it was a long time ago.”

  “I should have noticed that something was wrong. Paid more attention. I just thought you were upset about breaking up with Jack.”

  “Well, that was part of it.”

  “And you already told him this?”

  “It all just came spilling out.”

  “So, I hate to ask, but you guys seem to be attached at the hip, so I’m assuming the two of you are giving it another shot?”

  I blush wildly and laugh. “That just sort of happened. I was going to commit to his friend idea.”

  “He can be very convincing.”

  “Well, he tried to pull a Ben and has essentially moved himself in with me to make sure the boys and I are safe.”

  Liv tilts her head. “Well, considering what happened to me that might not be such a bad idea.”

  I shake mine. “I’ve barely gotten used to the idea of being home. We’re just going to have to take this one life-changing moment at a time.”

  Jack comes up, his shirt tucked into the back pocket of his well-worn jeans. Maybe it’s a good thing he won’t leave me alone because I can’t seem to keep my hands off of him. “That’s the last of it,” he says. “You ladies finish…” He trails off looking around the empty porch and frowning. “What the hell were you two doing while we were loading this shit up?”

  Livvie bares her teeth at him in a look that I think is supposed to resemble a smile.

  “Livvie was giving me the third degree, don’t blame her,” I tell him.

  “Oh, yeah? And what were you doing that you couldn’t help?”

  I bat my lashes at him. “I was keeping her company.”

  He takes the shirt out of his back pocket to wipe his face of sweat. He pauses with it on his chin and sends me a contemplative look. Then he smiles and it’s a bit feral around the edges. Like he sees something he wants to eat and that something…is me.

  He grabs one end of the shirt with each hand and starts winding it up into a taut little rope.

  “Don’t you dare,” I warn him, getting to my feet and backing away from him. But there isn’t anywhere to go and my back bumps against the porch railing. He lets the shirt go with a pop and it flicks against my legs with a sharp sting. “You asshole!” I shout.

  He crowds me, covering me with his sweat and I push him away. “No, you can’t love on me, you dick.”

  “Uh oh,” Ben says from the doorway. “Trouble in paradise already?”

  Jack’s lips find my ear and he bites down. “You just wait until I get you home later,” he whispers. His breath fans over the sensitive skin there and I shiver against him. “The boys go to camp in a few weeks and we’ll have your place all to ourselves. I’ll have you in bed for as long as I want you.”

  My hands are stuck between us, and all I can feel are his abs, all twelve of them. I’ll admit, even sweaty and dirty, I want to rip his clothes off. Maybe even more so.

  “Okay,” Livvie says from behind him. “I’m regretting the sister comment. I forgot how into PDA you two were.”

  Jack laughs against my throat and pulls away, his eyes dancing. Before he can put more distance between us, I grab him by the neck for a kiss that promises all of the things that I can’t say out loud.

  “My eyes. They burn!” Livvie interrupts.

  I must have misunderstood exactly what this basketball game was about because it’s not the single games in the gym. No. This is some sort of tournament that takes place at the rec fields where there are a half-dozen courts all backed up against one another. It seems like every resident of Nassau has shown up to participate. Hundreds and hundreds of people mill about and parking is a bitch.

  “Why don’t you guys go and we’ll catch up,” Ben says, pulling his truck up next to ours. We’d managed to snag a parking spot just as someone was leaving.

  “All right,” Jack yells over the sound of the crowd. “We’ll meet you at registration.”

  “I don’t remember this being such a big thing,” I say to him as we navigate through the masses of people with a huge net of basketballs and their duffles of uniforms and God-only-knows-what.

  “Probably because you are a girl and were more interested in playing on the monkey bars or something.” He spots whatever he’s looking for over the sea of bobbing heads and he dives into the mass of bodies, holding tight onto my hand so I don’t get lost in the crowd. “There’s the registration table. We’ll find out where their team is at, then we’ll get a good spot on the bleachers.”

  I shouldn’t be enjoying today, not when I know what’s waiting for me, but with a tight hold on Jack’s hand, I feel like I can conquer anything. I pull him back and he glances at me.

  “Everything okay?”

  Smiling, I press my lips to his. “I’ll talk to your friend,” I say. “I want to help her.”

  He stops the boys with a raised hand. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes, it’s time I stopped running, right? And if I were her I’d want to know there were other’s like me.”

  “Have I mentioned you’re the bravest women I know?”

  “I don’t know about that, but I know I couldn’t have done this without you.”

  “You could have, but I’m glad you’re letting me help you.” He kisses me again. “Finally.” Then another kiss on my forehead. “After the game we’ll have to renegotiate our friends truce.”

  “Why? Wanna be friends-with-benefits?” I tease.

  He slaps a playful hand on my ass and hands me the leash where Rosie
is happily winding around our legs. “Why don’t you take this one to water some grass while we hit the registration table. The line looks long, and I don’t think she’ll be able to wait.”

  Jack and the boys melt into the crowd and Rosie tugs the leash to a patch of untrampled grass. I turn my face into the sun until it warms me from the inside out.

  When I open my eyes, I blink, not trusting what I’m seeing. When Rosie pushes to my leg, the fur on her back sticking up as she growls, I realize I’m not seeing things.

  Damian pushes his way through the crowd and comes to stand by my side.

  “There you are. C’mon, honey. Wake up.”

  It’s the voice from my nightmares, one I hoped to never hear again. I try to jerk awake, but the signals must be misfiring because no matter how much I scream at my limbs to move, they don’t do my bidding.

  “That’s my girl. Give it a few minutes for it to wear off. No, no, don’t try to move. It’ll just make you dizzy.”

  Ignoring that, I attempt to bring my hands in front of me to protect the blows that are sure to come, but to no avail.

  I recognize the smell first. Sweat. Dirt. Rubber. Oh God, no.

  We’re in Jack’s gym, though not in the storage room from before, in the main section. I blink rapidly, allowing the image to coalesce. We’re in the ring, the bank of mirrors to my back. My arms are secured to the top line with nylon rope, my feet to the bottom. There’s a gag stuffed in my mouth, already soaked with saliva.

  Damian paces in front of me, glancing at the front doors. The fact that he hasn’t pushed me down and commenced with a reunion tour of our last time here causes hope to flare in my chest.

  He hears my disturbed sounds and turns to face me, a smile twisting his features. Tugging the gag down, he says, “Don’t worry, it’ll all be over soon, sweetheart.”

  My tongue feels two sizes too big for my mouth. “It will be over even faster if you let me go. Just let me go before the police get here. I’m sure they’re already looking for me.”

  “So they can take me away again? Lock me up in a cage? After what I did for our country? I don’t think so.” He starts pacing again. “I don’t fucking think so. Soon as this is over, I’m going to take you far away from here so we won’t have to deal with this anymore. It’ll be just me and you. Like I should have done in the first place. Like I would have done if they hadn’t pinned that assault on me.”