Match Penalty (Utah Fury Hockey Book 2)

by Brittney Mulliner

  His brows furrowed. I didn’t want to explain what I meant, but luckily, he seemed to catch on.

  “I wasn’t as bad as I was made out to be. The team gave me a role to play, and the media took it to the next level. Every girl I posed for a picture with was supposedly my girlfriend, or another girl I was sleeping with. I didn’t want it to get as bad as it did, but it was out of my control. I can promise you that I haven’t been out with anyone since the beginning of the season.”

  I nodded. Chloe told me the same thing.

  “I know you might not believe it, but I don’t want to be the eternal bachelor that parties for the rest of his life.”

  “You don’t?”

  He shook his head.

  “Then what do you want?”

  He stared into my eyes until I felt like he was looking into my soul. “I want forever. I want to find the one person that I can spend my entire life with. I want the house and the family. The backyard and the dog.”

  I had to look away. As much as I wanted to peer into his eyes for the rest of my life and listen to him talk about a future. I couldn’t. I couldn’t pretend that his dreams included me.

  “Are you ready for some hot chocolate?”

  I nodded and hurried to the exit. I wanted a moment to think. One night and he was changing everything. I’d formed a clear picture of him. I thought I knew who he was, but he was proving me wrong. What else could he change? The longer I stayed here the more likely I was to fall apart.

  It was safe to assume he was a playboy. It was easy to put him in that box and forget about him, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t forget about him no matter how hard I tried.

  I sat on the bench and took off both skates by the time Erik joined me. “Is everything all right?”

  I nodded. “I’m just ready to get these off.”

  “Yeah, it can be exhausting.”

  He had no idea. I followed him out of the ice rink and he stopped at the sidewalk and turned back. He reached for my hand and I let him take it. This was good. Let him lead. Get rid of the thoughts and feelings that were building inside of me making me more confused by the minute. He noticed me.

  That was something I could never say about Clark, and it broke my heart. I wanted so badly for this to happen. For us to be a reality. But I was stuck. I couldn’t just ignore his past, but was it something I could move past? Was it something he was willing to let go of?

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Erik

  We walked into a small café and I led Madi to an empty table in the back. “What can I get you?”

  She sat and looked up at the display near the cashier.

  Her smile grew, and she pointed to a display of chocolate croissants. “One of those, please.”

  I nodded and walked to the line. I looked away from her and through the window. Madeline wasn’t the kind of woman I pictured myself with. She was kind, patient, considerate, loving, compassionate…and now I was listing every quality I could think of. This wasn’t right. I was supposed to be the single one. I didn’t deserve a woman like her.

  I ordered and brought back the two cups and two bags and placed them on the table. “They had chocolate croissants, so I got you one of those, but if you want a plain one I’ll trade you.”

  I slid a bag toward her and she grabbed it before I could take it back.

  “No way.” She opened the bag and tore off a corner. She shoved it in her mouth and instantly moaned. It was the single best thing I’d heard in ages.

  “That good?”

  She nodded and took a sip of the hot cocoa. “Carmel?”

  I smiled and took a sip of my drink.

  “How?”

  I shrugged. “You have Carmellos in your bag at all times. At first, I thought it was the same one, but I saw one with a missing corner, then the next day it was fine. I realized you must really like them.”

  She nodded slowly with a full mouth. I waited for her to finish but she turned and stared out the window.

  “You seem lost in your head.”

  She met my eyes and looked guilty. What was she thinking about?

  “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s fine.” I watched her, feeling a small smile creep on my lips. “Is there anything on your mind?”

  A million questions flashed across her face. I’d never seen her look so uncertain.

  “Well…” She faded off.

  I waited for more but nothing came. “Madeline, you can tell me anything.”

  “I’ve heard some things.”

  I narrowed by eyes and waited. I knew better than to volunteer information in these situations. No need to add evidence.

  “Even before I moved here. I heard about your reputation.”

  I waited. I could only image the crap she’d heard.

  “I’m confused. There’s that side of you, but I haven’t seen that. I know we haven’t known each other for very long, but I feel like I know you. But my idea of who you are conflicts with everything I’ve heard.” She paused her rambling, but I stayed silent hoping she continue. “I don’t know which version of you is the real you. It scares me. I’ve been fooled before. I know I can be blind, and I don’t want to make that mistake again.”

  I sat back and crossed my arms.

  She wasn’t wrong. There were multiple sides to me. Some had been crafted by the team, some I showed the public, some I showed the team, and some I kept to myself. But didn’t everyone? I couldn’t be myself in certain situations. I couldn’t bare it all, my heart and soul, to the media. They would use it and exploit it. There were parts of me I only shared with those I was closest to, and there were parts that no one had seen yet.

  “I get that. I do. I’d never want to hurt you, but how can I prove to you who I really am?” I looked down at my hands and sighed. “The only way is for you to spend time with me. For you to form your own opinion. I can sit here and deny things all night, but that won’t really change what you think.”

  She was biting her lip. Silently watching me. Like she had been all night. I knew something was off. I thought maybe it was nerves. Maybe she didn’t know how to date after everything with her ex. But this was the real problem. My reputation. Something I had helped create, but it wasn’t me. At least, not all of me.

  “I’ve dated a lot. I’ve made mistakes. Hurt feelings and I regret that. But I don’t know if I would necessarily change anything.”

  She narrowed her eyes and I had a feeling she didn’t like what I was saying.

  “Every mistake and poor decision helped shape me into who I am today, and I’m pretty okay with this person. I’m not perfect, far from it. But I try. I try to be better. I try to make better choices and do things that bring people happiness.”

  “I know you do.”

  Did she?

  “I know you’re not some horrible person, Erik. I’m not trying to make it seem like you are. The thing that worries me is how quickly your interest may wander.”

  She thought I would cheat on her? Just drop her for the next best thing? What man in his right mind would leave her? I studied her face. Her eyes glistened, and her nose was a little too red to just be reacting to the cold.

  She was upset. But why?

  The suit.

  That idiot.

  “Madeline, I have never and would never cheat on someone.”

  She blinked and looked away.

  “I would never do that to you. You deserve to be worshipped. You should be loved and adored and held onto like the treasure you are.”

  She laughed and wiped one eye. “You’re too much.”

  I reached across the table and held her hand. “I’m being honest. I might be stupid sometimes. I might forget important dates or misunderstand your needs, but I would never, ever intentionally hurt you. I promise.”

  She sniffed and looked up at me through thick, wet lashes.

  “They said you were one of the good ones.”

  “Who?”

  “The Pride.”

 
; I squeezed her hand. “I thought they were the ones that warned you about me.”

  She giggled. “They were also the ones that invited me out last week for an intervention of sorts. They spent a good twenty minutes telling me how great you are.”

  I shook my head. Yet another reason why I would never fully understand women.

  “And you believed them?”

  She shrugged. “My mom is rooting for you too.”

  That was a surprise. “Really?”

  “Yeah, I thought at first maybe you were paying them off, but you’ve proven they were speaking the truth tonight.”

  I never would have expected her to say that. I thought I would have a lot of groveling and begging in my future. It was a blessing she was so willing to forgive. Another thing that made me hate the suit even more. How could he hurt someone so loving?

  “There’s something I need to ask you.”

  Her eyes widened, just slightly. “What?”

  “Are you over your ex?”

  She sat back and pulled her hand away from mine. Not a good sign. I didn’t speak. I didn’t want to interrupt her or give her a reason not to answer.

  After a minute she finally answered. “Yes.”

  If only I were secure enough to trust that. “But how? It’s been a week. Don’t get me wrong. I want that man out of your life and mind more than anything, but I want to be sure you’re ready to move on.”

  She smiled. “I appreciate that. Things with him were over long before last week. It took me a little while to realize that, but moving out was a formality. We grew apart. We stopped caring about each other. What we each wanted didn’t match anymore. I realized that, and that was the hardest part to accept.”

  “That you guys wanted different things?”

  “No, not necessarily. It was more admitting that I was wrong. That I’d made a mistake.”

  That I could understand. “Sometimes it’s easier to continue with something than admit that it’s wrong.”

  She nodded. “Exactly. Once I realized that I needed to admit I’d been wrong, I got over it. I couldn’t keep living that lie. I didn’t want to. My feelings for him faded a long time ago.”

  “So, you’re not looking for a rebound?”

  I finally admitted out loud what I’d been thinking. Worrying about since I met her. I didn’t want her to run to me and make another mistake. I didn’t want her to think of me as a way to get over a heartbreak. I cared too much about her. I couldn’t be someone to heal her heart and send her off for some other man. I couldn’t do it.

  She reached forward and took both of my hands. “No.” She looked into my eyes and I could see the truth. “I tried not to want you. I really, really didn’t want to. But you snuck into my mind, then my heart. I like you, Erik.”

  “Like like?”

  She grinned. “Definitely like like.”

  “Let’s get out of here.”

  We abandoned our treats and rushed outside. The cold air was like a slap in the face, but it reminded me I was alive. I was here, with Madeline. Something I didn’t think would ever happen.

  I pulled her against me and wrapped my arm around her shoulder. She snuggled into me as we hurried down the street. We stopped at the corner and waited for the light to change.

  I leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “Thanks for coming out with me tonight.”

  She giggled and turned to face me. “I may have been a bit nervous about it.”

  “Really?”

  She nodded. “But I’m glad I did.”

  “Me too.”

  The traffic around us disappeared. All I saw was her. Her eyes. Her smooth skin. Her lips.

  Her face inched closer and I took that as my sign. I dipped my head and brushed my lips across her cheek.

  Slowly.

  I trailed my fingers up her arms and took her face in my hands, caressing her jaw with my thumb. Her hands gripped my coat and tugged me toward her. Her warm lips melted my heart.

  I was gone.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Madeline

  The Fury won their game last night, so to celebrate, Erik and Chloe were hosting a dinner party tonight. Instead of dread or worry, I felt excited. He’d called me before he had to dress out, and after the game yesterday I got to see him for a minute. It meant a lot to me to know he was thinking of me even when he was busy or exhausted. Yet another thing I’d missed out on with Clark. I thought it would feel like smothering having someone check in on me, but it wasn’t. It showed me how much he cared. It made me feel like we were both in this. We were both invested. It made me more secure in my decision to give him—us—a shot.

  After work, I went home and changed into a navy wrap dress and nude heels. Since we were staying inside, I could actually dress up a little.

  I was almost to the door when Mom caught me.

  “Where are you off to?” She looked up and beamed. “Oh, honey! You look beautiful.”

  “Thanks, Mom.” I picked my purse off the entry table and tried to open the door, but she stepped in front, blocking me.

  “Where are you going?”

  “Chloe’s.” Not a lie.

  “And Erik’s.” She winked and stepped to the side. “Have fun.”

  “Thanks.”

  I hurried before she thought of any other questions. I’d told her our first date had gone really well, but I was hesitant to give too much information. I wanted to keep it to myself. I wanted to keep our relationship safe. No judgments or opinions. But I couldn’t keep it from Mom, and I was sure she was updating Dad every night.

  When I got to their apartment, I skipped knocking and opened the door. The living room was already packed.

  I waved to Howe and Brassard sitting on the couch and looked for Erik. Olli looked up and pointed to the hall with the hand wrapped around Emma’s shoulders.

  I mouthed my thanks and followed his directions. I waved to the crowd taking over the kitchen and snuck down the hall. Chloe’s door was closed when I passed, but that wasn’t my destination. Erik’s door was cracked, so I pushed it open enough to see in. He was sitting on his bed tying a shoe.

  He looked up when I stepped in and smiled. “Hey, you.”

  I melted just a little at that smile. I couldn’t believe it was for me. Mine. He was mine. There was no getting used to that, and I didn’t want to. I wanted the butterflies and excitement forever.

  “Are you hiding?”

  He laughed and stood up. I walked into his arms and wrapped mine around his waist.

  “No. I was helping Chloe set up, then she had to go get ready, so I got stuck finishing. I didn’t get to take a shower until about thirty minutes ago.”

  “That’s nice of you to help her.”

  “I didn’t have much choice.”

  I giggled, but he silenced me with a kiss. It was light and sweet and just what I needed after missing him today. I was already missing him. I was in over my head.

  He pulled back and smiled down at me. “Are you ready?”

  I nodded. “Can I leave my purse in here?”

  “Of course.” He took it from me and set it on his bed, then turned and took my hand on his way out of the room. I followed him back to the living room where everyone was waiting. Chloe was addressing them and paused for a second when she saw us enter.

  “And Erik and I are so excited to have everyone here tonight to celebrate a great game. The Fury have been on fire this season and we know it’s because we have a great team. We’re more than just a bunch of players and their wives or girlfriends. We’re a family. Each of our losses or successes matter to all of us.”

  The room erupted in applause and a few of the guys started chanting, “Fur-y! Fur-y!”

  When everyone quieted down, Erik pulled me with him to the front of the room. “And I want to thank you all for coming over. I know you’re tired. You have your own lives, your own families, but we love you guys. I want to also let my family know…” He gestured to the room while I tr
ied to predict where he was going with this little rant. “That Madeline and I are officially together!”

  Not what I was expecting. We weren’t trying to keep it a secret, and I was sure by the end of the night everyone would figure it out, but I wasn’t anticipating an announcement.

  Despite my shock, I smiled and hugged everyone that came up to congratulate us. A few of the guys slapped Erik on the back and told him well done or it’s about time. I just shook my head and laughed. I guess we were out and the people were happy.

  “Now, let’s eat! Chloe was slaving away over this meal all day.”

  There were a few groans, and Chloe pretended to be offended. “Hey! I’m not that bad!”

  Erik, Hartman, Reese, and Howe all began laughing.

  She put her hands on her hips and shook her head. “Fine, maybe I am. I’ve learned my lesson and only order catering now. Don’t worry, it’s all edible.”

  “Let’s eat.” Erik waved the crowd to the kitchen where an impressive barbeque spread was set up along both counters.

  “You guys go all out.” I waited for more of the group to go through the line before stepping in with Erik.

  “I know these guys can eat.”

  That was an understatement. Growing up, when we had the team over for dinners, Mom and Dad filled a second fridge with food. It seemed like no matter how much you provided, it was always gone.

  We filled our plates and found seats in the kitchen with Chloe and Reese. She looked up and smiled at me before raising an eyebrow and sizing up her brother.

  “That was quite the little proclamation, Erik.”

  He smiled and took a huge bite of pulled pork.

  “How do you feel about that?” she asked me before breaking a roll in half and taking a bite.

  “I was surprised, but people would have figured it out tonight anyway.”

  Erik nodded and wiped his mouth. “I wanted everyone to know. No secrets.”

  The look Chloe gave him should have melted his skin off. I looked between the two of them, feeling out of place. Reese smirked and leaned behind Chloe toward me.

  “Chloe and I kept our relationship a secret at first. She didn’t tell Erik.”