Just What the Cowboy Needed

by Teresa Southwick

  “Okay,” Jan said. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

  “I slept with Logan.” Grace’s eyes widened, and she slapped a hand over her mouth. That was not the way she’d planned to start this conversation. “Oh—wow—you must think I’m a horrible person.”

  “I’m old, honey, but not so ancient that I don’t remember wanting to have sex with a man more than anything else in the whole world.”

  “Still—I was there for child care not...that.” Her cheeks felt hot. “He was the strong, noble one. I pushed him into it. Don’t judge.”

  “Good gravy, that’s the last thing I’d do,” Jan assured her. “Actually, I’m lying about that. My judgment is that you’re one of the best and strongest women I’ve ever met. Against the odds, what with being abandoned by your mother, you’ve turned into a sweet, beautiful, honorable, principled person.”

  “That means a lot to me coming from you.”

  “Now that that’s out of the way... Tell me about this Logan.”

  “He’s a good man. Such a good father, although he doesn’t see that. He’s overprotective in the best possible way. Just trying his darnedest to always do the right thing. Especially for his daughter.”

  “Then what’s the problem?”

  “His father was not a very good husband, and his family fell apart. Logan is afraid he’s like that and he’ll destroy any woman he cares about.”

  “So he won’t let himself care,” Jan concluded.

  “Yes.” Tears filled Grace’s eyes. “Unfortunately, I care about him quite a lot.”

  She explained the rest, everything from Logan wanting her to stay, then his father showing up to push for a relationship with his granddaughter. And finally Logan asking her to leave.

  “I think he feels something.”

  Jan nodded her agreement. “He would have let you go when your contract was up if he didn’t.”

  “I was a kid no one wanted, and it’s easy to see when someone has a lot of love to give. Logan does, but he just can’t bring himself to give it to me—”

  Grace lost it then and started to cry. She covered her face with her hands as sobs tore through her. Then she felt Jan’s arms come around her.

  “Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry you’re hurting.” The older woman’s tone was sympathetic and angry at the same time. “If you ask me, the man is a jackass.”

  “I know.” Grace dropped her hands and gave the woman a wobbly smile. “But he’s the jackass I love.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  On Sunday around dinnertime, Logan stopped his truck in front of the pretty two-story house with the oval etched-glass front door and the flower-lined brick path. “Home, sweet home, baby girl.”

  “I’m not a baby, Daddy. I’ve told you and told you.” She gave him the long-suffering look that said he was dumb as dirt.

  “You’ll always be my baby and I’ll be calling you that even when you’re twenty-five.”

  “Wow, that’s so old.”

  Which would make him ancient. Lately he’d felt that way more than he ever had before. Missing Grace took the color out of everything. But he managed to smile at his daughter and did his best to savor the moment. Because after handing her off to her mother, he would be going back to the ranch that was too quiet, too bare.

  He tried to keep Grace out of his head, but she refused to stay away. That would take time. But even as he thought it, doubts crept in. A million years wouldn’t be long enough to forget her.

  He opened the driver’s door. “Let’s go see your mom.”

  “Okay, Daddy.”

  On the passenger side he helped her down, then retrieved her small pink princess suitcase from the rear seat. Logan rested his hand on her shoulder as they walked up the path to the front door. Cassie rang the doorbell, and moments later an indistinct figure appeared in the glass just as the dead bolt turned.

  The door opened and Tracy smiled. “Hi, you guys.”

  Cassie went in and hugged her. “Hi, Mommy.”

  “Now, that’s a good hug, Cass. Your hugs have been super hard since I got home. Either you got really big and strong while I was on my honeymoon or you missed me a lot while I was away.”

  “It sure was long.” The pouty little look was designed to produce the maximum amount of guilt.

  Logan wondered if she practiced that expression in front of the mirror. It was perfect and worked like a charm on him.

  “How long are you going to hold it against me that I went away?” Tracy took the pout in stride and smiled. “I’ve been back a week now. And I dare you to tell me you didn’t have fun while I was gone. After all, your dad let you ride a horse.”

  Cassie snapped out of her little snit and grinned. “I did have fun.”

  “I thought so. Now, go wash up for dinner.”

  “Can Daddy stay?”

  “Sure.” She met his gaze. “Would you like to?”

  “I don’t want to intrude.” He set Cassie’s suitcase just inside the door. “You’re a married woman now.”

  Tracy made a dismissive sound and closed the door. “If it was a problem, I would tell you. And you know that. We’ve been friends too long to play games.”

  “Yeah.” He was grateful for her friendship. “I just wanted to make sure your husband doesn’t mind.”

  “Den?” Tracy waved her hand. “He wouldn’t care even if he was going to be here. He’s at the office. Figured Cassie was with you and we didn’t have plans so he’d put in a couple hours of work. He’s still catching up on stuff that accumulated while we were gone. Being a busy accountant is a good thing, but his partner couldn’t keep up with everything.”

  “You’re sure you don’t mind?” He shouldn’t question her too hard because dinner here meant he could put off facing that empty house.

  “I’d like the company.” Tracy’s gaze narrowed on him. “You didn’t even ask what I’m making. That’s not like you. What if the menu is quiche and brussels sprouts?”

  To be honest, he didn’t care if it was bread and water. For just a little while he would be distracted from wanting Grace so badly he ached in places he’d never known were there.

  “I hate quiche and brussels sprouts.” He shuddered.

  “Like I said. Friends for a long time. We’re having pot roast and mashed potatoes.”

  “My favorite.”

  “Den’s, too. Plus it will be good left over when he can see his way clear to abandoning numbers and spreadsheets and come home to his loving and devoted wife.” She looked down at her daughter. “I believe you were asked to wash up for dinner.”

  “I was hopin’ you forgot,” Cassie said.

  “Not a chance. You’ve been in Daddy’s barn and riding horses.” She wrinkled her nose at the thought. “Who knows what you touched. Now scoot.”

  “Ookay.” Cassie sighed, then dragged herself down the hall to the bathroom.

  “And you can set the table,” Tracy told him.

  He washed his hands at the kitchen sink, then did as requested. This was Tracy’s house, and he knew where everything was. But there were signs that a man lived here now. Athletic shoes by the back door. A flannel shirt hung on a hook beside it. Her husband’s baseball hat hanging on the shirt.

  “So,” he said. “Den moved in here.”

  “Temporarily.” Tracy stirred gravy in a pot on the stove.

  “Trouble in paradise?”

  “What?” She looked up, then laughed. “No. I meant that we’re going to look for a house together. Eventually. We didn’t want Cassie to experience a lot of changes all at once. New house. Starting kindergarten. A man sleeping in Mommy’s bed.”

  Logan thought she looked happier than he’d ever seen her. The glow was probably visible from space. Envy knifed through him, not that he begrudged her having it all. Just that he didn’t have anything clos
e.

  “I take it you have no regrets about tying the knot.”

  Her smile was radiant. “No.”

  “Well, marriage looks good on you.” He nodded. “You guys make a great couple.”

  “Speaking of couples...” Tracy turned the burner down to low and met his gaze.

  It suddenly felt as if she’d turned the heat up on him. “Whatever you’re going to say—don’t.”

  “Have you been in touch with Grace since she left?”

  “What part of ‘don’t ask’ did you not understand?”

  “Seriously?” She put her hands on her hips. “This is me. Your best friend. And I want to know about you and Grace.”

  “There is no me and Grace.” Although he had to admit there was a nice ring to linking their names. But he’d blown any possible chance of that happening.

  “Why not?”

  Logan was instantly on the defensive. “I don’t understand the question.”

  “Oh, brother.” She shook her head. “You’re not really that dense, are you?”

  “There’s no good answer to that, so I’m not even going to try.”

  “Then just listen.” Tracy’s look was sympathetic. “There was a spark between you and Grace. I saw the way she looked at you. And, believe me, I’ve never seen you look at any woman the way you did her. I expected flames any second.”

  The knot in his gut twisted tighter as the truth of her words sank in. But admitting she was right would make his pushing her away even more real. “You haven’t seen every woman I’ve ever looked at.”

  “Maybe not. But I’ve seen enough, and I know you.” She sighed. “She stayed on after her contract was up. Everyone in Blackwater Lake knows, so don’t give me that look. Obviously you asked her to hang around. I’m only surprised you let her go at all.”

  “I didn’t actually let her go.” Logan rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “It was best for her.”

  “You threw her out?” Tracy’s voice was pitched quite a bit higher.

  “Not exactly.” Liar. That’s exactly what he’d done. “The thing is, I didn’t want to hurt her.”

  “Oh, Logan—I’d so hoped Grace had gotten through to you, convinced you that you’re not a heartless man.”

  Like his father. But Grace was the first one to make him question the bitterness he’d carried around all these years. “She got me thinking.”

  “Good.” Tracy’s approval didn’t last long. “And then you shot yourself in the foot? Cut off your nose to spite your face? Threw the baby out with the bathwater—”

  “I get it.”

  “Do you?” Her eyes flashed. “If you did, you would have moved heaven and earth to keep her here.”

  “Her life is in Buckskin Pass.”

  “People relocate all the time for reasons less important than love.” She stared him down. “Tell me you’re not in love with Grace.”

  He wanted to. He wished he wasn’t. But confirming it would never happen. Somehow he knew saying those words out loud would rip his heart to shreds.

  “It’s my fault she left. And before you say anything, you’re right. I’m an idiot.” He glared at her. “Are you happy now?”

  There was only pity in her eyes. “I’m so sorry, Logan. It’s just that you and Grace were so good together.”

  Cassie came running into the kitchen, and there was no way she hadn’t heard what her mother said. “I miss Grace. Daddy, are you going to marry her?”

  “Honey, I—”

  “You have to,” she said. “She can be Belle and you’re Prince Adam.”

  Beauty and the Beast. Was it life imitating art? Could he really have the family he’d always wanted?

  Logan went down on one knee in front of his daughter. “I can’t make any promises, baby girl.”

  But he had to try to fix things.

  * * *

  After looking at houses with her real estate agent, Grace still wasn’t as excited as she’d expected to be. She’d seen a cute little cottage that was perfect for her and planned to give herself twenty-four hours to think it over before making her final decision. A place of her own had been her goal for as long as she could remember, and she was so close to reaching it. Instead of jumping up and down, she wanted to pull the bedcovers over her head.

  “This is all Logan’s fault,” she muttered to herself.

  But that wasn’t fair. He’d warned her not to fall for him, although that was like telling her not to breathe. It was just that loving him when he couldn’t love her back had sucked all the joy right out of her dream.

  She was headed back to her rented room at Jan’s house and turned left onto Saddleback Street. As she drove closer, she noticed there was a truck parked at the curb. A very familiar red truck, the very one that Logan had picked her up and put her in on the day of Tracy’s wedding. The memory of being in his arms backhanded her heart in an especially painful way.

  Why was he here? Did she leave something at the ranch? If she had, he could have mailed it. So why drive all this way from Blackwater Lake? Her heart was pounding by the time she pulled her car into the driveway behind Jan’s. It took every ounce of determination she had not to back right out and burn rubber to get out of there.

  Hope was the cruelest emotion ever. All her life, every move from one placement to the next, she hoped this was when a family would want her and she’d have a place to belong. That never happened, and hope turned into her worst nightmare. But right this second she knew every one of those letdowns was nothing compared with how Logan could destroy her if she let herself hope this time.

  Grace got out of the car and walked up the three steps, then opened the front door. In Jan’s living room there were two floral-print love seats facing each other. Her landlady was sitting on one with a cup of tea on the oak coffee table in front of her. Logan sat on the other, his back to the door, but he stood and looked at her when she came inside and closed it.

  “Look who’s here, Grace.” Jan smiled and her tone was friendly, but her eyes told a different story. She was definitely Team Grace. “Logan and I have been getting acquainted while you were house hunting.”

  He held his Stetson in his hands. “Hi, Grace. How are you?”

  “Fine, thanks.” It was on the tip of her tongue to ask what he was doing so far from home. But after what happened the last time they were together, she was in no mood to make this easy on him. She deliberately let the silence drag on.

  Finally, he cleared his throat. “Did you find a house?”

  “Yes.” He had no right to the information that she was mulling it over.

  “Oh.”

  “That’s great, Gracie.” Jan picked up her cup and took a sip of tea then replaced it on the saucer. “Where is it?”

  “The Matthews place on Cheyenne Court.”

  “I know it.” The landlady nodded her approval. “That’s closer to the elementary school for work and looks really nice from the outside.”

  “The interior needs a little cosmetic attention, but I can take my time with that.”

  “Congratulations,” Logan said. “So you put a down payment on it?”

  “My agent advised me to give it twenty-four hours to see if it still feels right. So I’ll be doing that tomorrow.”

  A spark of something popped in his eyes. “Would it be all right if I talked to you? Right now?”

  “Of course.” She folded her arms over her chest.

  He hesitated for a moment and looked at Jan. “Alone?”

  Her friend started to get up, but Grace put up a hand. “Stay right where you are.”

  “Okay.” Jan sat back down.

  “So, what’s on your mind, Logan?”

  He tossed the Stetson onto the love seat and met her gaze. “I’m sorry for what I did to you. I wasn’t prepared when my father showed up. I
t threw me. I took it out on you, and that was wrong. You deserve so much better.”

  “I could not agree with you more.” Grace held her head high. “So, I accept your apology, and if that’s all—”

  “It’s not.” He glanced at Jan for just a moment, then back to her. “Cassie misses you.”

  Double whammy to her heart, and she took a moment before saying anything. “I miss her, too.”

  “She’s not the only one.”

  “Oh?” Darn it. Hope didn’t seem inclined to behave itself and started to stir inside her.

  He continued as if she was the only person in the room. “I miss you, Grace. More than I can say. Nothing is the same without you.”

  Grace did her level best to keep hope at bay, but between the sincerity in his eyes and the words she’d longed to hear it was pretty much impossible. Still, she tried one more time. “I’m sorry to hear that, Logan. But I was only hired for a limited time.”

  “That’s not what I’m talking about, and you know it. This thing between us has nothing to do with your contract.” He looked down for a few seconds and blew out a breath. “I didn’t want to. I tried to stop and couldn’t. The thing is, I fell in love with you, Grace.”

  “Oh, my—that is my cue to leave you two alone.” Jan sniffled, then stood and walked over to Grace.

  “Please don’t leave me,” she begged.

  “Oh, honey. You got this.” The other woman leaned in close and whispered, “Just my opinion and worth what you paid for it, but I’m thinking he’s not really a jackass.”

  Grace watched her friend leave, then looked at Logan. “I don’t know why I should believe you.”

  His gaze never left hers. “You were right. About everything. I’m not my father, and the truth is, he’s not all bad.”

  “What made you change your mind about that?”

  “You.” He took a step closer, and their bodies were inches apart. “Because of you I began to question what happened. My conclusions and everything I believed about him and myself.”