Deep Blue

by Jules Barnard

  The screech of the zipper has me jumping back, tucking the book under my pillow. I roll on my side, head propped on my hand. “Hey,” I say, breathlessly, as if I’ve been caught doing something I shouldn’t.

  If Jaeger notices, he doesn’t show it. His eyes are at half-mast as he slips his wallet from his back pocket, kicks off his shoes, and crawls onto the bed face down. A rumbly sound comes from his chest. I think he said hello, but I can’t be sure.

  I crawl on his back and dip my head over his shoulder by his ear. “You okay?”

  He turns his head to the side. “Now. Don’t move. Feels good. I’ll be asleep in three seconds.”

  I’m worried about him. He’s wearing himself out. “You’re exhausted. What can I do to help? Do you want me to beat Kate up and get her sister’s phone number?”

  He snorts. “No. My lawyer has people searching birth certificates for information on her daughter. They offered to track Kate’s sister Hannah down, but I’ve got tomorrow off. I’m heading up again. I don’t want the lawyer getting involved yet. Don’t want to scare Hannah or the girl.”

  I roll to the side, facing him. “Let me go with you. I’ll take the day off too.” He studies my face. “It might be nice for them to know there’s another woman in the picture. Maybe Hannah doesn’t trust Kate. It could help soothe the situation if she and her husband know you’re in a serious relationship. The kind of guy who commits.”

  His gaze is interested but guarded. “You don’t have to.”

  “I want to.”

  Jaeger raises his head and kisses my lips. “I’d like that.”

  The next day we leave at six a.m. to beat traffic and catch Kate’s sister before she begins her day. We arrive in Reno at seven thirty, and pull into the Donner Springs neighborhood.

  “What’s the sister like?” I ask.

  “Hannah? No idea. Kate and Hannah didn’t get along in high school. I met her a couple of times, but the visits were brief. I’m surprised custody went to her. Kate manipulated her parents, but she had a better relationship with them than her sister.”

  “And the little girl’s name?” It could have been intentional on my part, to block what I don’t want to believe, but I’ve rarely asked Jaeger about his daughter. If she’s going to be in his life, I need to make a bigger effort to learn about her.

  His jaw tightens and he shakes his head. “Kate won’t tell me anything, not even that. She’s not making sense. Whatever I learn from Hannah, I know it will be different from what Kate’s telling me. For all I know, Kate dumped the child on her sister’s doorstep and told her to take care of it.”

  Jaeger checks the address on his truck’s GPS and pulls up to a small yellow house with a yard that needs to be mowed. “We’re here.” A maroon sedan sits in the drive, a car seat in the back.

  We walk up the driveway and I grab Jaeger’s hand before he knocks on the door. A child’s playful screech sounds in the background, along with a thunder of small footsteps.

  My heart pounds, my hands cold and clammy. I glance over and Jaeger smiles reassuringly. I think I’m more nervous than he is.

  The sound of a chain sliding free scrapes before the door opens. A woman with tawny, shoulder-length hair and dark blue eyes stands on the other side. “Yes?”

  “Hannah? I’m Jaeger Lang. I—uh, I dated your sister. Back in high school.”

  The woman blinks, her quick gaze taking in his size, then settling on his face. “Oh, sure. Hi, Jaeg. Is everything okay? I don’t really keep in touch with Kate, if that’s why you’re here …” She glances at me curiously.

  Jaeger anchors an arm around my waist. “This is my girlfriend, Cali. I’ve seen Kate. I’m here because of what she told me. Do you mind if we come in and talk to you for a minute?”

  Hannah opens the screen door. “I’ve got to leave for work soon and drop off my daughter at school, but we have a little time.”

  She guides us to a living room with an overworn brown couch, the pillows askew. “Sorry about this.” Hannah tucks the cushions back in place. “My daughter’s going through a fort phase.”

  Jaeger smiles and sits on the couch. “Actually, your daughter is why we’re here.” He takes a deep breath, tension rolling off his stiff posture. “Kate told me we had a child together. She said you’ve been given temporary custody.”

  Hannah stares without blinking for a solid minute. “Mark!” she yells without breaking eye contact, her pitch escalating at the end. “Come in here, please.”

  A man in his early thirties walks into the living room from down the hall, wrapping a tie around his neck in a knot. His gaze goes straight to his wife in concern, then touches on us. “I didn’t know we had guests.” It’s a statement, but there’s a question in his voice.

  “This is Jaeg,” Hannah says. “Kate’s ex-boyfriend from high school, and his girlfriend Cali.” Her tone is terse, but I don’t think it’s directed at us. “Please tell my husband Mark what you just told me, Jaeg.”

  Jaeger clears his throat. “I’m here because Kate returned to town and informed me we have a child together. She said you and your wife are caring for our four-year-old daughter, but she wouldn’t give me your number or specifics about the child, and I wanted to find out more information.”

  “What?” Mark’s voice is loud like a bark, his tone dark.

  A little girl runs into the room and grabs her father’s leg. She has straight blond hair pulled back with flower barrettes, and green eyes. She could pass for Jaeger’s daughter with her coloring, as long as no one saw her next to Mark. She’s the spitting image of her father, right down to the dimple in her chin.

  “Sweetheart—” Mark crouches and faces his daughter. “—special treat this morning.” He smiles, but there’s a touch of tension in his voice. “You can play with your dress-up clothes before school.”

  The little girl frowns briefly, possibly picking up the edge in her father’s tone, then seems to realize her coup. Squeals ensue and she runs out of the room back down the hallway.

  Mark sinks into a chair next to his wife, his hands gripping the armrests. “What the hell is going on?”

  I’m tapping my foot and squeezing Jaeger’s hand to death. This is so not right. These people have no idea what we’re talking about.

  Somehow Jaeger remains calm. Even the contours of his face have softened. “I’m here to find out if I have a daughter.”

  “Well,” Hannah says. “I don’t know if you have a daughter, Jaeg, but I can tell you that my daughter came from my body, not my sister’s.” She smiles ironically. “Childbirth is one of those things a woman doesn’t forget.”

  “Okay.” Jaeger nods. “Good.” He shifts in his seat, his brows bunching in thought. “You said you aren’t close to Kate, but do you know if she has a child?”

  “I don’t keep in touch with her, but my parents do. They would have known if she’d been pregnant. She’s close to my mom.” Bitterness seeps from her tone. “Mom puts up with Kate’s crap.”

  Jaeger rubs his forehead. “So there’s no way that the little girl I just saw or any other girl you’ve taken care of in your home is my child?”

  “There’s only one child we’ve raised,” Mark says. “And there is no way she is yours. Kate lied to you.”

  Jaeger takes a deep breath and leans back. “Okay. Okay—thank you. I’m sorry to have bothered you this morning.” He squeezes my hand and stands.

  “Jaeg,” Hannah says, “before you leave, tell me what’s going on with Kate. My mom hasn’t spoken to her in weeks. I don’t care what Kate’s up to, but it sounds like she’s getting into trouble again and my mom should know. We thought her problems were behind her after her boyfriend went to prison two months ago. If she’s fabricating lies about having a child …” She looks to her husband. “I’m worried for our daughter, Mark. Maybe we should call the police.”

  “On it.” Mark pulls out his cell phone and walks away.

  Jaeger and I exchange a look.

  �
�She’s living at my house,” Jaeger says. “She said we needed to show a stable environment in order to regain custody of our child. I didn’t trust her from the moment she walked back into my life, but I didn’t want to take the chance in case she was telling the truth. Didn’t want anything bad to happen to the little girl.”

  Hannah nods. “I understand. You did the right thing. You always were too good for my sister. I’m sorry she used you. We’ll tell the police what’s going on and help you in whatever way we can, but our first priority is to keep our daughter safe. I mean, what if she had kidnapped her one afternoon to show you?”

  Jaeger nods and pulls out his phone. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to call my parents. My father hired a lawyer and I want to tell them what we discovered.”

  Hannah stands. “Of course, go ahead. Can I get you anything to drink or eat? My husband and I will go in to work late today—or maybe I’ll stay home.” She looks toward the hall. “I don’t want to be away from my daughter with my sister making dangerous claims. She’s selfish and irresponsible, but I never thought she’d do anything like this.”

  Jaeger exchanges phone numbers with Hannah and her husband before we leave. He gets a call from them on the drive back to Lake Tahoe. They’re filing a restraining order against Kate. Jaeger also spoke to his father and found out the lawyer his dad hired is having a thirty-day legal notice delivered to Kate to vacate Jaeger’s home. She’s claiming a right to occupancy, which legally she has since Jaeger allowed her to move in.

  We’re stuck with her for thirty more effing days. “What if she destroys your house or steals stuff?” I ask as we pull into town.

  “My workshop is all I care about, and it’s locked tight. We’ll swing by, though, and I’ll remove important documents and my computer. Mason will hold it until I get Kate out.” He looks over. “I’m sorry, Cali. For putting you through this.”

  “I’ll be fine. I’m worried about you; you’ve been kicked out of your house.”

  “Even if she burned the place down, nothing could be worse than finding out Kate was telling the truth.” He stretches his neck. “I’m thanking my lucky stars she lied about the kid. No man should be tied to Kate for a lifetime. Or any child, for that matter. Besides, I’m living in the best place in town.” He grins.

  “The tent?” I chuckle.

  Jaeger grabs my thigh and rubs it up and down. “Wherever you are is where I want to be.”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  The next morning, Jaeger takes off for a meeting with his father and lawyer. Afterward, he’s going to his shop to work. I hate the idea of him near Kate—the woman is ruthless—but he’s got commissions due.

  Tyler’s sitting at the dining room table typing on his computer.

  “What was Jaeger’s ex like back in high school?” I’ve tried less obvious approaches, but Tyler hasn’t responded to subtlety.

  “A bitch. I hated that chick.”

  Okay, that’s direct. “Jeez, Tyler, tell me what you really think.” I’ve never heard my brother call a woman a derogatory name. Probably an artifact of growing up with a strong mother.

  Tyler’s hands still on the keyboard. He picks up the spoon from his bowl of cereal and scoops the last bite. “I barely knew her. She just seemed like a social climber, and then she dumped Jaeg when he was at his lowest.”

  He stands and walks to the kitchen, dumping his dishes in the sink.

  “Hey, this isn’t a bed and breakfast. Wash your dishes.”

  Tyler saunters past me and kisses the top of my head. “That’s what I have you for.”

  “You’ve turned into a real ass, you know that?” Something happened to my affable brother back in Boulder. He’s always teased me, but he’s downright grumpy these days.

  “You have no idea. Taking a shower,” he says, and locks the bathroom door behind him.

  After class that evening, I convince Leo to drive the extra distance to Jaeger’s house. Jaeger’s been in his shop most of the day and I want to surprise him with the food and drinks I picked up from the on-campus café. It’s not much of a dinner, but I don’t think he’ll care. He’s got dark circles under his eyes and his cheeks are growing hollow. He makes two sandwiches when he gets to my place and inhales them before crashing on our air mattress. Sometimes I wonder if it’s the only meal he’s had all day.

  Leo’s car idles in front of Jaeger’s house as I grab the bags of food. “Nice location,” he says, peering at the moonlit lake beyond the trees.

  The front door swings open and Kate steps onto the porch. A motion detector light reveals the scowl on her face. She’s got to be in top evil form now that they issued the eviction notice. I think I’ll skip the house and go straight to the workshop.

  I swivel my head to say goodbye to Leo, but he’s squinting at Kate. Kate’s looking straight at him as if measuring him up, recognition crossing her features. “You two know each other?” I ask.

  His mouth twists. “I—yeah, I think. My roommate’s into some stuff. He has these parties … pretty sure I’ve seen her at them.”

  Jaeger walks out of his woodshop, wiping his hands on a towel. He looks exhausted, his frame bowed. His eyes scan from me to Leo and his mouth tightens.

  This doesn’t look good. “Thanks for the ride, Leo,” I say quickly and hop out of the car. Jaeger has been pushed to his limit. I’ve seen the kind of damage he can do to a guy when he isn’t trying. I’d rather not give him a reason to take out his frustration on poor Leo.

  “Surprise!” I walk over and kiss Jaeger’s tense lips. His gaze tracks Leo’s small truck down the lane. I shove the bag of food at his chest and he looks down and blinks. A sweet smile spreads across his face. “You’ve been working so hard, I wanted to check in on you.”

  “Thanks, babe.” Jaeger’s eyes flicker angrily toward Kate on the porch. She spins around and slams the front door behind her.

  There’s the angst.

  He holds me close for a moment, his lips skimming over my hairline, the tension in his shoulders releasing. “Give me a minute to clean up and we can get going.”

  Jaeger puts away tools, wipes down a table, and sweeps the floor of his woodshop. I watch from the couch, enraptured. I could stare at Jaeger moving around all day in jeans that fit his butt to perfection, wood shavings speckling his T-shirt and hair, all responsible and hardworking.

  He glances around as if checking for remaining clean-up, and his gaze lands on me.

  I squirm, suddenly aware of the last time I sat on this couch, or rather, lay on it.

  Jaeger moves forward and my heart kicks up. He crouches at my feet and runs his palms up my bare legs to the edges of my denim skirt. “What do you want to do?”

  Oh, I have ideas.

  I scowl in the direction of the house. “Go to my place.”

  Outside, Jaeger’s face contorts as he looks down the drive. He helps me into his truck. “Who’s that guy that gives you rides?”

  “Leo? He’s in my CAD class. We carpool, except it’s not really carpooling because I don’t give him rides. I usually buy dinner after class to make up for gas money.”

  “You buy him dinner,” he says in a tone that’s not altogether happy.

  “I’ve gotta do something for him, Jaeger. I’d feel like a mooch if I didn’t.”

  He nods stiffly, obviously not liking my answer. “We’ve gotta get you a car. I don’t want you stranded or needing to rely on others to get around.”

  “Yeah, well, that would be nice, but I can’t afford one. Anyway, for now, I’m good. When Gen and Tyler leave in the fall, I’ll have to use the bus until I can save up for something.”

  Jaeger frowns out the window of his truck as he turns the ignition. It’s damn embarrassing to admit to your highly successful boyfriend that you can’t afford a car.

  Minutes later, we pull into my gravel driveway, my eyes bugging out at my mom’s blue sedan parked on the street.

  What the hell?

  Shit. My mom suspected s
omething between me and Jaeger when I visited, but I haven’t talked to her since things became official. She probably knew more about my feelings for Jaeger than I did at the time. I was still in denial and dealing with the loss of my job and graduate school.

  Crap, crap! I’m not prepared for this confrontation. I love Jaeger, but I’d hoped to have a private conversation with my mom. She might draw conclusions about me jumping into a relationship on the heels of my last. To her, this would look like a rebound, but it’s not. My relationship with Jaeger is the first real one I’ve had.

  “So, um, Jaeger?” He looks over, brows furrowing. My voice is shaky and I realize I’m squeezing the bejesus out of his hand on the seat between us. I loosen my grip. “That’s my mom’s car. She’s here. I didn’t know she was coming.”

  A beat passes. “You need me to leave?” He’s trying to hide it, but there’s hurt in his eyes.

  “No, but it might not go perfectly. I haven’t had a chance to tell her about us.”

  “I’m okay, if you’re okay.”

  I smile. “I’m okay.” Or I will be after this confrontation. It’s like pulling off a Band-Aid. Mom might react to the suddenness of our relationship, but she’ll get over it.

  We walk to the front door. And then I remember the tent out back and the fact Jaeger is staying with me.

  This is going to be awkward as hell.

  My mom is washing dishes in the kitchen, her back to us when we walk in. She’s humming, breaking into a chorus every few bars to Love Bites from Def Leppard. It’s one of her favorites. If I’m warped, I blame it on the eighties music my mom subjected me to over the years.

  “Mom, what are you doing here?”

  She spins, gasping, her hand over her heart. “Calista, don’t sneak up.” She huffs out a breath and eyes Jaeger. “Can’t a mom visit her children?” she says distractedly.

  “You usually call first,” I point out.

  She shakes water off her hands over the sink and walks into the living room, patting them on her jeans. She reaches out to Jaeger, glaring at me. “Hi, Jaeg. Good to see you again. My, you’ve grown.” Mom’s eyes dart down his body.