Finding Our Forever

by Lan LLP

  I have no shame admitting that I’m addicted to Carson’s perfectly sculpted body. The two-week no-sex restriction from Dr. Laurent is almost impossible for me, especially when his wet, naked frame is pressed against mine in a hot, steamy shower. I force myself to step out before I’m finished because my craving was growing ravenously out of control. Carson follows me out shortly after to get dressed for work. He dons his body in the sexiest suit I’ve ever seen on him. It’s black with a hint of sheen, a crisp white shirt with silky linen lines and a tie with dark shades of silver and gray running diagonally. Taking in a sharp breath, I appreciate his striking good looks with fantasizing thoughts. He finds my gazing eyes as he slowly makes his way to me and locks onto them. Gripping the plush collar of my robe with both hands, he pulls me into his lips for a morning kiss.

  “Mmm…forget the coffee. I’ll take a cup of you instead,” he tells me in a smoldering voice.

  “Me, too. I’ll take seconds and thirds of you anytime.” I copy his trifling as my hand grope his semi-hard erection.

  “Easy, Lil or I’ll make you relieve me of my problem,” he warns with a raised brow and smirk. “It isn’t nice to send a sexually deprived man to work with a hard-on, little vixen.”

  Painting on my most angelic face, I deny, “Who? Me? I would never do such a thing,” and then unzip his trousers. Snaking my hand underneath his boxer briefs, I gently grip his erection. “Whoa, how did this happen?” I ask with a cheeky grin.

  Seizing my hands, Carson advances forward so I’m compelled to step backward until I fall on the bed. Peeling away the robe to expose my naked body, he runs his index finger from between my breasts all the way down to my clit. Circling his fingers over my aching sweet spot, he tells me with a sexy dimpled smile, “This. This is the cause of my problem.”

  “Uh…uh…,” I pant as his fingers tease me and then disappear. And so does the fulfilling sensation. “Don’t stop. Please,” I plead with desperation.

  “Stop what? Tell me, Lil,” he spurs.

  “Don’t stop touching me.”

  Resuming his torture, he asks, “More?” I nod willingly. “Do you want me to make you cum with my fingers?” he goads.

  “Yes. Oh, God. Yes,” I whimper as my eyes close to seal everything out except the heat that’s growing under Carson’s fingers. And then it’s cold again. I open my eyes to see Carson’s hands tucked in his pants pockets.

  “Lil, it’s only fair that we endure the same pain. We’re now both deprived,” he explains with a wicked grin while zipping up his trousers. Leaning into my lips, he leaves me a soft kiss and whispers, “Thanks for a wonderful morning. I’ll see you tonight.”

  Carson walks away, leaving me spread eagle and yearning for him. It’s my fault for challenging a man who’s a quadrillion times more experienced with sex than I am. I asked for it, and he delivered with eloquence. The smirk on his handsome face is a sure indication that he’s pleased with his victory over my amateur seduction. Not willing to let him have the last word, I pick up the burner phone to send Carson a text.

  If your problem still needs fixing, I know how ;) XOX Lil

  Carson immediately replies to my text.

  Stop teasing!!! You’re being very naughty, and it’s making my problem bigger and harder ;) x C

  His text makes me giggle. Feeling proud that Carson is still hard because of me, I celebrate my small defeat.

  __________

  What a world of difference it makes on a day’s outlook when Carson and I begin it with playfulness and flirting instead of bitterness and resentment. During my identity makeover with Nikki yesterday, she spoke so fondly of Carson. I got the impression they’re very tight. You can usually judge a person’s honesty by the way they look into your eyes when they’re speaking to you. Nikki’s eyes never faltered once.

  “He isn’t a filthy rich man with a cold heart,” she explained. “He’s given more than he has gained throughout his years of research.” She suggested that I shouldn’t be too tough on Carson. “His intentions are always based on love when it comes to people who are closest to him. He might appear to have everything together, but this love thing scares the hell out of him. Carson is in constant fear of screwing things up with you. Losing you would probably be the worst thing that can happen to him,” she confided in me. “He’s never loved anyone else after Emily. I know you’re the real deal. He’s so different with you—much more endearing and doting. Trust me. He has little or no patience for anyone else, especially Bianca,” she clarified. “He only agreed to marry her because of my persistent Aunt Kat.” Nikki’s validation answered a lot of unclear questions for me.

  Thanks to Nikki’s surprise visit, I’m able to push my blames and insecurities aside. I hope to look pass all of our hurdles and move on from here. This is why my goal for today is to check out the Harvard Medical School campus. I want to see if it’ll be a good fit for me. I didn’t choose it initially because I felt my peers might lean more toward the snooty side. If I don’t feel comfortable then I’ll have to find a plan B.

  Before I’m able to reveal my plan for the day to Luke, Nikki comes prancing through the private pantry door again. This must be her favorite way to enter, or maybe it’s a proclamation from Carson. Regardless of what the reason may be, I’m thrilled to see her again.

  “Lillian, I told you my plan would work!” she exclaims as she throws her hands excitedly in the air. “Carson called me first thing this morning to give me a special thank you. Those two words are few and far between, so I’m sure he was extremely pleased with the surprise I left behind for you.” She giggles and winks at me. Instantly, my cheeks flush pink from her insinuation. I can hardly call what she left me a nightgown. It was sheer as mist and was held together with a silky ribbon that Carson easily ripped apart.

  “He’s okay with me leaving, but Luke has to tag along,” I inform her while rolling my eyes.

  “I have many places I want to take you to today, sweetie,” Nikki tells me. I guess my trip to Harvard will have to wait for another day. I hate to disappoint her after all she’s done to break me free from Carson’s prison. “Do you like to dance?” she asks.

  “Not really. I’m no good at it,” I reply, wondering why she’s inquiring about dancing out of the blue.

  “Nonsense, everyone has rhythm. You just need to find yours,” she explains. “I take dance lessons once to twice a week and have participated in several competitions,” she shares. “The Latin dances appeal to me the most. It’s intense and very sensual if you find the right partner. I signed us up for a class this morning,” she tells me. Omgeez, is she kidding? I don’t want to spend my first day of freedom in a dance studio. It might be better to be locked up here instead.

  “Oh…that sounds like a lot of fun,” I tell her very unconvincingly as I force my pursed smile from changing into a frown.

  “It sure will!” she exclaims. Looping her arm around mine, she drags me through the pantry door exit with Luke trailing quietly behind us.

  __________

  At around 5:00, Luke and I head back to the penthouse while Nikki returns to her hotel because of Charlie and Sophie. I felt awful for Luke in every way. He was forced to step in as my partner because Nikki was beyond our amateur level. He was stiffer than me, if that is even possible. I’ll never forget the fearful expression on his face because this is a man who eats fear for breakfast, lunch and dinner. We both had plenty of reservation. I think we agreed mentally that our bodies weren’t created for Latin or any other form of dance styles. Carson sent a humorous text after Nik sent him pictures of me and Luke stumbling over each other’s feet.

  Save some rhythm for tonight, baby! ;) x C

  What rhythm? :-( XOX Lil

  By the end of class, Luke and I both felt more confident with our stiff version of salsa. It wasn’t as terrifying as I thought it would be. I’m glad she dragged me here to introduce me to something I would’ve never done on my own volition.

  Being completely spent
from dancing, I plop my tired body on the nearest sofa to the door. I’m not moving a muscle until I absolutely have to. Luke is in the restroom when the doorbell chimes. Crap, who can it be? I force my aching body up to walk over to a security screen in the kitchen. It’s Andrew with a dish of some sort in his hands. I excitedly rush over to the door and open it without thinking. Andrew’s ghastly expression makes me think he’s staring at a ghost.

  “Hey, Andrew. Come on in,” I greet and welcome him. He warily steps into the penthouse. “Are you okay?” I ask.

  “Um…um…yes, I’m fine,” he stammers with guarded eyes. “I brought Carson a dish because he told me um…,” he falters over his words again.

  “Spit it out! Told you what, Andrew?” I demand, wondering what’s freaking him out. And then it dawns on me. It must be my goth appearance that’s troubling him.

  “He told me he doesn’t have time to cook,” he answers as he continues to stare at me in disbelief.

  Luke comes charging at us, scaring the life out of Andrew and making him almost drop his dish. “Whoa, Luke!” I yell with my arms out to shield a frightened Andrew. “It’s okay! This is Andrew, he’s a friend,” I assure as I face my palms to Luke to settle him.

  “He’s not on Mr. Bradley’s list. I have to report this,” Luke warns me.

  “Fine, do what you have to,” I snap with irritation. Luke backs away to retreat to his private corner. I’m sure the first thing he’ll do is call Carson to tell him I broke one of his stupid rules. He’s such a tattler and to think, I thought we had bonded after that painful salsa class.

  I take the dish from Andrew, grab his hand and lead him to the kitchen with me. “Andrew, are you okay?” I ask him again, hoping he’s calmed down enough to answer me truthfully.

  “Are you Lillian?” he asks as he tilts his head back and forth scrutinizing my face.

  “Yes, do I look really different to you?” I pry.

  “Yes, but I thought you were dead. At least that’s what the news and Carson…,” he offers but stops mid-speech.

  “What did Carson disclose to you?” I heatedly inquire. “Did he tell you I died in a car accident?” Andrew’s eyes grew wider as he decides what to say next.

  “Um…yes. I’ve been watching the news ever since I ran into Carson the other day. I felt so awful for him as well as you. Thank the good Lord that you’re alive and safe.”

  “Me, too!” I agree with him, and we both laugh.

  “What’s going on, Lillian? Why would Carson tell me you’re dead?” I pause before answering Andrew. I trust him. I’m confident I can safely confide in him. Andrew seems sincere to me. I’ve felt this kindred connection with him since we first met.

  “I’m not sure why Carson lied to you, but he’s been extremely paranoid since two of his researchers went missing without a trace,” I whisper so Luke can’t hear me. “I think he thinks my accident may have something to do with the same people who kidnapped his researchers, but he hasn’t come out and told me so.” Andrew has his hands over his mouth as if he’s using them to hold back his shock. “But I think my accident has something to do with his ex-fiancée, Bianca,” I divulge openly to him at even a softer whisper. I’ve been dying to unload this theory on someone and haven’t even been able to share it with Belle. Maybe it’s too much too fast for Andrew because he’s still stunned.

  “How are you able to remain so calm, Lil?” he finally speaks. “I would be a ball of anxiety on legs.”

  “It hasn’t been easy. I decided last night to believe that whatever Carson does, he does it out of love for me. I’m hoping this will keep me sane—at least for now.”

  “Oh my god, girl, your life is more dramatic than a soap opera on crack,” he squeals.

  “Shh…keep it down or Luke will hear us. He’s Carson’s eyes and ears,” I warn Andrew as my eyes glance over to the living room. And just like the walls have ears, Luke comes around the corner with his phone telling me Carson would like to speak with me. Uh-oh, I’m in trouble. I ask Andrew to give me a minute as I walk over to the glass doors by the pool.

  Chapter 7

  Carson Bradley

  Lily takes the phone from Luke and answers, “Hey, how’s it going at work?”

  I ignore her attempt at pleasantry because she should know better than to answer the door when I’ve specifically instructed her not to. “Luke told me you have a visitor. Who is it and why did you let him in?” I demand in a stern tone.

  “It’s just Andrew,” she tells me nonchalantly. What she doesn’t or maybe she does by now know is the fact that I told him she died in a car crash two days prior. So now I have another dilemma on my hands, convincing Andrew and Stewart to keep our secret from the public. To make matters worse, Stewart already hates me for some reason. I might already be shit out of luck.

  “I don’t care who it is, Lil. I’ve already told you never to answer the door. And where was Luke, anyway?” My volume erupts as I feel my temper rise and spill over the top.

  “It’s not Luke’s fault,” she defends in a cutting tone. “I opened it without thinking because it’s a normal thing to do—answer the door,” she sarcastically retorts, taking full responsibility for her action and confronting me head on. She has some audacity to stand up to me. I’ve dealt with men three times her size who’d dare not question my authority. “You need to tell me why you want people to think I’m dead,” she demands. Ugh…I knew this is bound to happen. She’s a smart girl who needs answers that I won’t be able to conceal from her for much longer.

  “The less you know, the better it is for you,” I snip and the line goes dead. She hung up on me. I can’t fucking believe she hung up on me. No woman, in fact no one, has ever cut me off. Jesus, she’s impossible! I’m so angry I can throw this damn phone across my office. Her obstinacy is almost as bad as mine. I can already see us butting heads into our golden years. I smirk and shake my head at this bittersweet thought and then my temperature plummets into a normal range.

  Between my research work and keeping Lily occupied, my hands are undoubtedly full. Luckily, Owen was able to complete all the arrangements I need for our trip to Hong Kong tomorrow morning. He was able to obtain her passport and visa without a hitch. This is one less thing I have to worry about—thank god.

  My original plan was to take Lil to my parents for dinner tonight and then spring our trip to China on our way home. They’ve been anxious to see us ever since we’ve flown back to Boston, especially my mother. With all her good intentions, she’s been ready to offer Lil her shoulders, but I’ve been hesitant. Lil is still sensitive to any mention of her miscarriage, so I want to do all I can to shield her from anymore suffering and crying. I know I’ve been losing some serious brownie points by keeping Lil from my mother. She hasn’t been very pleased with me, but she’ll get over it. She loves me too much to stay mad at me for too long. Unfortunately, after the explosion Lil and I just had, I can’t see her being in any mood for company. Mother will be heartbroken when I call her to cancel dinner.

  Wesley Montgomery

  I’ve been in Boston for only two days, and I already want to be back in Hong Kong. My father has kept my schedule packed with meeting after meeting. I haven’t had a chance to hit the trendy lounge scene since I’ve been back, but truthfully, it hasn’t bothered me any. This was always the highlight of my evening after work. I’d stalk the hottest girl in the club or lounge and take her to my place and fuck her until I had my fill. Afterwards, I’d promise to call, and I never followed through. That was my game.

  Things changed for me after I met Bridgette. No woman, no matter how sexy she was, appealed to me in the least. Bridgette isn’t only incredibly beautiful, but is also gifted with intelligence and talents. She is one of the top CEOs of Marcus Ly’s ten medical supply companies. Being his granddaughter had nothing to do with her position. She erected the tenth company entirely herself, making him the wealthiest and most powerful man in China. Unlucky for me, Mr. Ly has a detestable grudge agains
t my family. I’m not sure where it all stemmed from, but his mandate for me is to steer as far away from Bridgette as possible or our business ties would be severed without mercy. Marcus is not the kind of man you want to cross.

  Bridgette and I shared an intense relationship without her granddad’s knowledge for about two years. The addictive taste of her lips and the feel of her tight walls are still embedded in my mind. There wasn’t a place that was off limits for us when it came to fucking. She knew how to satisfy me like no other woman with her femininity, and then pillow-talk business like a threatening kingpin afterwards. God, I love her. I don’t know why I never had the balls to tell her that. There’s no one like Bridgette.

  Our taboo relationship ended when her granddad’s bodyguard caught us in her office. Bridgette showed her deadly fangs that night, and it was very effective. She threatened and paid him off to keep his mouth shut as she stood confidently in front of her desk with just my white shirt wrapped around her body.

  “It’s over, Wes,” she stated coldly after the bodyguard stormed out. “The risk is too great for us…for you.” Her tone softened slightly. Bridgette didn’t want to see me lose my company nor did she want to continue lying to her granddad. She had always made it clear to me that if she had to choose between her family and me, she would choose her family. Bridgette’s love and respect for her granddad is unfaltering. She would never go against his wishes or command.

  I took her into my arms and attempted to lock on to her light brown eyes. “It’ll never be over for me,” I declared. “I know what you have to do, and I respect that. But I’d give up anything to keep what we have.” Bridgette maintained a rigid stance and refused to respond to my appeal. I knew that no matter what I offered, she wasn’t going to change her mind. That was the saddest moment of my life. To this day, she still has my heart captured behind her cold sable-brown eyes—three years later.