The Book of Joe
Page 18
pizza order—@SavageJoeBiden, https://twitter.com/SavageJoeBiden/status/802699218737475584
fake birth certificate—@JonnySun, https://twitter.com/jonnysun/status/797198272079298568
Ashley’s “He sat there for an hour and laughed”—Moneyish.com, March 13, 2017, https://moneyish.com/ish/this-is-joe-bidens-favorite-obama-biden-bromance-meme/
“Doesn’t this feel right”—@TheDiLLon1, https://twitter.com/TheDiLLon1/status/788114505624612864.
Biden’s courtship of Arlen Specter—“Biden Worked on Specter ‘100 Days,’” Politico.com, April 28, 2009.
“This is a big fucking deal”—I mean, it was.
“last hope”—“Biden Talks Seen as Last Hope for Debt Ceiling,” Reuters, May 23, 2011.
“close working relationship”—“Biden, McConnell and the Making of a Deal,” Politico.com, August 2, 2011.
“We got results that would not have been possible”—“Senators Deliver Farewell Tribute to Vice President Joe Biden,” NPR, December 7, 2016.
Biden’s material at the Gridiron Club—“Biden Lampoons Obama at Gridiron Dinner: ‘He Thinks Easter Is About Him,’” Huffington Post, May 25, 2011.
“Isn’t it a bitch, this vice president thing?”—“All Politics Is Personal,” Harvard Gazette, October 3, 2014.
“lubricated” joke—YouTube, via The Weekly Standard, March 21, 2012.
“His mom…God rest her soul”—via YouTube.
“largest economic stimulus in history”—“Here’s What a Biden Campaign Would Look Like,” Politico.com, February 18, 2016.
“But then he started drilling me”—Ziskend phone interview, June 19, 2017.
“As corny as it sounds”—“Biden on July Fourth: Swearing in troops, cursing ‘S.O.B.’ Saddam,” CNN.com, July 4, 2009.
“Biden shook every hand”—Traub, “After Cheney.”
swearing-in ceremonies—“Biden Charms in Senate Ceremonies,” TheHill.com, January 6, 2015.
Valentine’s Day windows stunt—ABC News, February 12, 2010.
rat on podium, overhead compartment—Ziskend phone interview, June 19, 2017.
April Fool’s—Rachael Ray, August 10, 2015.
Obama, “first Second Lady in our nation’s history to keep her day job”—from speech awarding Biden with Medal of Freedom.
sleeping with a community college professor—“Joe Biden: I Sleep with a Cutie College Professor Every Night,” CBSNews.com, April 7, 2014.
“The absolute most important thing is your family”—Ziskend phone interview, June 19, 2017.
Letter to staff—originally shared on Twitter via @DerekJJohnson—https://twitter.com/derekjjohnson/status/761603002406809600.
9
BEAU (1969–2015)
“A parent knows success when”—statement from VP Biden when Beau passed.
“The incredible bond I have with my children”—Biden’s commencement speech at Yale University (New Haven, Conn.) on May 17, 2015; “Family Losses Frame Vice President Biden’s Career,” Washington Post, May 31, 2015.
“He even looked and sounded like Joe”—from Obama’s eulogy honoring Beau Biden.
“He didn’t want any special attention”—The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, September 10, 2015.
“win it fair and square”—Obama’s eulogy honoring Beau Biden.
“Biden Most Popular Man in Delaware—Beau”—Biden’s commencement speech at Yale University.
“My son stepped in” comments—“Joe Biden Speaks at Syracuse University About Sexual Assault Prevention,” The Daily Orange, November 12, 2015.
“The first memory I have is of lying in a hospital bed”—Hunter’s comments at Beau’s funeral.
“Anytime folks on the far right are going after my father”—Beau Biden on This Week, October 14, 2012.
Obama’s story of Beau asking for the ticket—Obama’s eulogy.
Fake name instead…like “Roberts”—Biden on Colbert’s show, September 10, 2015.
“He abhorred people who had a sense of entitlement”—Ibid.
Beau’s lighter side—Obama’s eulogy.
Dressing up as Don Johnson—“Beau’s friends gather to recall a side of him few knew,” DelawareOnline.com, June 6, 2015.
“I have a duty to fulfill as attorney general”—“Biden’s Son Will Not Run for Father’s Senate Seat,” New York Times, January 25, 2010.
“He didn’t cut corners”—Obama’s eulogy.
“Nothing is more important than keeping our kids safe.”—Beau Biden, “Shining a brighter light on child sexual abuse in Delaware,” DelawareOnline.com, July 26, 2014.
He collapsed…stage 4 glioblastoma cancer—diagnosed in 2013, http://www.cancersupportcommunity.org/blog/2017/05/brain-tumor-awareness-month-cancer-research-and.
Clean bill of health—“Family Losses Frame Vice President Biden’s Career.”
“I’ll never own a stock”—D’Agostino, “Things My Father Taught Me.”
“Don’t sell that house”—Biden interview with Gloria Borger, CNN, January 12, 2016.
“Promise me you’re going to be all right”—Biden on Colbert’s show, September 10, 2015.
“Beau measured himself as a husband, father, son, and brother”—statement released from VP Biden when Beau passed.
“From his dad, he learned how to get back up when life knocked him down”—Obama’s eulogy.
Colbert and Biden back-and-forth—Biden on Colbert’s show, September 10, 2015.
“That’s the biggest tragedy in the last election”—Mike Haltzel phone interview, June 21, 2017.
“I don’t think any man or woman should run for president unless”—Biden on Colbert’s show, September 10, 2015.
“Sometimes it just sort of overwhelms you”—Ibid.
“Imagine if you all worked together”—“Joe Biden Just Announced a Huge New National Cancer Database,” Fortune.com, June 6, 2016.
“You’ll find peace when there are certain rules”—as Joe Biden remembered the speech (he quoted Beau when giving a commencement speech to Notre Dame, South Bend, Ind., in 2016), https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gH99Ol7nTsY.
10
GET BACK UP! (2016–FOREVER)
“Millions of Americans have been knocked down”—from Biden’s acceptance speech in 2008, which still seems as timely as ever…
“I don’t want to embarrass the guy”—from the awarding of the Presidential Medal of Freedom ceremony.
The memes:
I am the watcher on the wall—@JillBidenVeep (parody account), https://twitter.com/JillBidenVeep/status/820297312412909568
I’ve…haaaaad the time of my life (this still cracks me up)—@TrentFromTwitta, https://twitter.com/TrentFromTwitta/status/819704201110581249
Green Lantern—@Barack_and_Joe, https://twitter.com/Barack_and_Joe/status/822174063653167104.
“everybody’s got a fair shot”—from the awarding of the Presidential Medal of Freedom ceremony.
“I’ve been rooting for [Trump’s] success”—NPR Fresh Air, June 15, 2017.
Lobbying McCain before the health care vote—“Biden Lobbied McCain on Healthcare Vote: Report,” TheHill.com, July 29, 2017.
“But it’s up to all of you to have the gumption”—“Joe Biden Speaks at Syracuse University About Sexual Assault Prevention,” The Daily Orange, November 12, 2015.
“A good life at its core is about being personal”—Biden’s commencement speech at Yale University.
Biden at the Tonys—“Joe Biden Tried to Fix His Broken Seat at the Tonys,” Page Six, June 12, 2017.
SELECTED BIBLIOGRAPHY
Bailey, Holly. “Joe Biden, White House Truth Teller.” Newsweek, October 9, 2009.
Biden, Joseph R. “More U.N. Appeasement in Bosnia.” New York Times, June 7, 1993.
———. “20 Years of Change: Joe Biden on the Violence Against Women Act.” Time, September 10, 2014.
/> ———. Promises to Keep: On Life and Politics. New York: Random House, 2007.
Bronner, Ethan. Battle for Justice, How the Bork Nomination Shook America. New York: Union Square Press, 2007.
Clemons, Steve. “The Biden Doctrine.” The Atlantic, August 22, 2016.
Connaughton, Jeff. The Payoff: Why Wall Street Always Wins. Westport, Conn.: Prospecta Press, 2012.
Cramer, Richard Ben. What It Takes: The Way to the White House. New York: Vintage Books, 1993.
D’Agostino, Ryan. “Things My Father Taught Me: An Interview with Joe and Hunter Biden.” Popular Mechanics, May 18, 2016.
Dovere, Edward-Isaac. “Biden’s ‘Anita’ Problem.” Politico.com, September 21, 2015.
Fussman, Cal. “Joe Biden: What I’ve Learned.” Esquire, December 14, 2011.
Gitenstein, Mark. Matters of Principle: An Insider’s Account of America’s Rejection of Robert Bork’s Nomination to the Supreme Court. New York: Simon & Schuster, 1992.
Heilemann, John, and Mark Halperin. Game Change: Obama and the Clintons, McCain and Palin, and the Race of a Lifetime. New York: HarperCollins, 2010.
Hill, Anita. Speaking Truth to Power. New York: Doubleday, 1997.
Kelley, Kitty. “Death and the All-American Boy.” The Washingtonian, June 1, 1974.
Laskas, Jeanne Marie. “Have You Heard the One About President Joe Biden?” GQ, July 18, 2013.
Lizza, Ryan. “Biden’s Brief.” The New Yorker. October 20, 2008.
Mayer, Jane, and Jill Abramson. Strange Justice: The Selling of Clarence Thomas. Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1994.
Naylor, Brian. “Biden’s Road to Senate Took Tragic Turn.” NPR, October 8, 2007.
Osnos, Evan. “The Biden Agenda.” The New Yorker, July 28, 2014.
Phillips, John. “What I’d Do Differently: Vice President Joe Biden.” Car and Driver, September 2011.
Plouffe, David. The Audacity to Win: The Inside Story and Lessons of Barack Obama’s Historic Victory. New York: Viking, 2009.
Sullivan, Amy. “Does Biden Have a Catholic Problem?” Time, September 13, 2008.
Terkel, Amanda. “Joe Biden Is a Hero Among Women’s Rights Groups. But It Wasn’t Always That Way.” Huffington Post, January 12, 2017.
Thrush, Glenn. “Joe Biden in Winter.” Politico.com, March 2014.
Toobin, Jeffrey. “Biden and the Supreme Court.” The New Yorker, October 13, 2015.
Traub, James. “After Cheney.” The New York Times Magazine. November 24, 2009.
Witcover, Jules. Joe Biden: A Life of Trial and Redemption. New York: HarperCollins, 2010.
DIRTY SUGAR PHOTOGRAPHY
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Jeff Wilser is the author of six books, including Alexander Hamilton’s Guide to Life and The Good News About What’s Bad for You…and The Bad News About What’s Good for You, named by Amazon as one of the Best Books of the Month in both Nonfiction and Humor. His work has appeared in print or online at GQ, Esquire, Time, New York magazine, Glamour, Cosmo, mental_floss, MTV, and the Huffington Post. His advice has been syndicated to a network of two hundred newspapers including the Miami Herald and the Chicago Tribune. He grew up in Texas, used to live in New York, and is now traveling the world indefinitely. Twitter at @JeffWilser.
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