"You guys! That's just gross! Yuck! I'm going into the house." Our kiss turned into giggles at that point, so we followed him into the house hand in hand.
"Eden! Mom and Dad were kissing in the driveway and it was GROSS!"
"Now, Gideon. I'll remember that when you grow up and start kissing girls." Cash is so good with them and loved teasing him. Gideon gets a disgusted look on his face and crinkled his nose, while Eden runs to me and Cash to give us hugs and kisses.
"No way, Dad! Girls are nasty! Why would I want to kiss one?" He starts making a gagging noise, which has all of us cracking up.
"I kiss you, Daddy." Cash whisks her into his arms and kisses her all over and then she does the same to him.
"That's right, you will always be my only little Princess and I'll be the only boy you ever kiss!"
"That's right, Daddy!" Oh she's so cute. Gideon is still looking disgusted by all of the kissing going around.
"Geez. Kiss, kiss, kiss. Can I go play my Xbox before dinner?" Cash looks over at me and we are both grinning.
"Yes Gideon, hurry up and get out of here before someone kisses you."
Cash gives me a wink and I knew that was my cue, so I grabbed him on his way out and gave him a big kiss on the cheek. He looks up at me and grins.
"Hmmm. That wasn't too bad. Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad! Come on Eden, I'll let you play too. Yell at us when dinner’s ready." Oh that boy. He sure has my heart. Cash puts Eden down to follow her brother and he pulls me into his arms and looks into my eyes.
"I have been meaning to ask you something. Wanna go to prom, aka a Christmas party with me? All of the men dress up in penguin suits and the woman dress up in gorgeous gowns."
"Ooh la la. You in a tux? I'm totally in!" I love the sight of him when he wears his business suits every day, but to actually see him in a tuxedo? Oh, I'm there.
"Wait. That was too easy. You know there will be a lot of people there. You're sure you're okay with that? Mom and Dad will be there and we do make it kid friendly, being Christmas and all, so the kids will be there." So, it's a family event? With me going it will let everyone at his office know that he's officially dating.
"Do you not want me to go? I can stay home if you want me to." Maybe he doesn't want anyone to know he's in a relationship. He puts his arms on my shoulder and each hand on each of my cheeks.
"No, sweetheart. That's not it. I want you to go, but it will be our first time stepping out into the public as a family unit. The press will even be there, as they are every year, because it’s always the biggest party of the year, next to New Years. I just want to prepare you for lots of stares and questions, when everyone starts wondering who the exquisite beauty is on my arm."
So, he's just trying to prepare me out of protectiveness. This will be the biggest event I've ever gone to and I am quite shy., It will probably be overwhelming, but I will have the kids and his parents there as well.
"Okay, I see. Honey, as long as I'm with you, I don't care where we are. I'll even call your mother and maybe we can go shopping together to find us a dress to wear and get the kids something to wear as well. When is it?" He reaches down and gives me a long kiss, before he answers me. He seems rather ecstatic.
"It's the night before Christmas Eve. Have I ever told you that I love how easy going you are? How did I ever get so lucky, as to have you walk into my life? I feel like the luckiest man in the world." Right now as guilty as I'm feeling about not telling him I'm pregnant, I would walk on hot coals if he asked me to.
"No Cash, I'm the lucky one." I leaned up and gave him another kiss. "I need to call your mother and set a day for us to go shopping. I'm actually looking forward to spending some one on one time with her."
"Go ahead and call her right now, Honey. I'm going to go kick Gideon's butt on the Xbox before dinner. I love you!"
"I love you, too! Try not to beat him too bad, haha..." He yells at me, as he's running up the stairs like a child.
"I'm not promising you anything! He may be crying when he comes down for dinner." Oh, how I love him. I love every one of them! I call Amelia as soon as he leaves the room, and we set one day next week to go shopping for our dresses for the party.
********************
"So, Olivia, what kind of dress are you looking for? Do you have a particular color or style that you want to wear?"
Being around Amelia is really making me miss my own mother and I wish I could call and tell her my news about the babies. I wish I could tell Amelia as well, but it’s best that no one but Claudia knows for the time being.
"I don't have a particular style, but Cash did say he would prefer for me to wear something blue to go with my eyes, haha. Honestly, I don't think there's anything striking about my eyes. They're blah blue compared to Cash's."
"Oh, I would have to disagree with you there. Yours might be a little lighter, but they're just as gorgeous and he's right, blue is definitely your color, a baby blue color will be perfect."
We had gone to eat breakfast before we came to the boutique to shop and I'm having problems concentrating due to my nausea. It's easier to hide from Cash when it hits me at the house, but right here, right now with his mother, is not going to be a small feat to hide.
"Do you happen to know where the restrooms are? I really need to pee, before I start trying on any dresses. I think I drank too much water with breakfast."
"That's a good idea. I'll go with you, because I need to go too. They're right around the corner over here."
Oh no! She can't go with me for what I need to do. I could say I'm coming down with a stomach virus or something, but then she will probably insist I leave and we plan this another day this week.
We reach the bathroom and I run into the closest stall and empty my stomach. Morning sickness doesn't care whether its day or night before it shows its ugly head, but it is an instant relief when you find your release.
"Olivia? Honey, are you okay? You're not coming down with something, are you? Should we try this in a couple of days? Oh honey, you should probably go home and get into bed."
It didn't take long this time, like it has been lately. I open the door and go to rinse my mouth out at the sink and wash my hands.
"No, it must have just been something I ate at breakfast. I feel fine now, so I think I'll be okay. Are you ready to go back and look at the dresses?" I go to open the door, but she stops me.
"Olivia? Aren't you forgetting something?" Oh God.. What did I forget? I look at her and she has a knowing look in her eyes.
"I'm sorry? What did I forget?"
"Um. You never went to the bathroom. I thought you said you had to pee." Oh my God. I'm so busted. Maybe.
"Oh, yeah! Sorry, I won't be but just a minute." I start walking back into the bathroom stall and she grabs my shoulder.
"Does Cash know?" I can either tell the truth here or I can lie to her face and she will KNOW that I'm lying to her, because I just cannot lie and then she will never trust me again, so I just shake my head and immediately start bawling.
She's the closest person that I have to my mom right now, so I just walk to her and she pulls me into her arms.
"Shhh. It'll be okay. Oh, honey. How far along are you? How long have you known?" I start bawling so hard I can't even form words.
"I... I... I... Fou.. Fou... Found out las las last week. And I'm eleven weeks pregnant. And, and, and Ca Cash told me that that he...he... he didn't want...want....any anymore kids, except for Gideon and Eden and said that if... if I....ever got pregnant...that he would...make...me get rid.. Of it... I can...can't tttell him...because I knnnow...he is going...to...think that I'm going to...ddddie!! I don't knnnnow what to dddooo!!"
I don't know how I got all of that out, or if she could even understand what I said. I pull away from her and look into her eyes to see if she hates me for lying to her son and she is crying herself.
"Oh, honey. You have to tell him. I know my son and I understand his fears, but you are having a baby! I'm going to have
another grandbaby! I'm so happy! He will be happy too. I know it will scare him a little bit, because of Vanessa, but I know he wouldn't make you get rid of it."
"That was one of his conditions before we continued our relationship. He asked me specifically if Gideon and Eden were enough and I told him yes and that was when he told me that if I got pregnant I would get rid of it, because he wasn't going to lose another woman that he loved to pregnancy again." Amelia looks furious.
"Was this before or after you two started getting intimate?"
"After. We had unprotected sex one time and afterwards I was freaking out, because we forgot to use anything and that was when he said it. We had a big fight about it actually."
"As well you should have! How can he look into Gideon and Eden's eyes and tell you to get rid of a baby that could be growing inside your body? What did you tell him?" I realize now that it's Cash that she's mad at and not me.
"I told him over my dead body, and that I've already lost three children and that if it happened, then I would keep it. I've never had complications with any of my pregnancies and their deliveries were normal and I told him that, but he still wouldn't budge. I can't tell him. I'm sorry I'm lying to your son, but I want to wait until after the holidays before I tell him and I'm past my first trimester."
Oh my God! My stomach is churning again. I run into the empty stall again and throw up and continue to throw up, until I'm dry heaving and there's nothing left. I come back out and Amelia is grinning from ear to ear.
"They say that a lot of morning sickness is a sign of a healthy baby. I know you're upset honey and I understand why, but let me go with you to tell him. I am his mother, you know. I can reason with him and get him to understand that this is a wonderful joyous occasion. Oh, I can't wait to tell Gideon when I get home. He's going to be so happy for the both of you."
"No! Please don't tell him! I haven't even told you the worst part. Well, not the worst, but the main reason I'm not telling Cash. You just don't understand how big this is."
"What do you mean by the worst part, Dear? Is something wrong with the baby?" How do I even put this into words? Surely, she will understand my ordeal when I tell her the biggest news.
"Well, that's the thing. We aren't just talking about a baby per se. More like babies, as in twins!!!!"
"Twins?" I've never seen a middle aged woman jump up and down before until this very moment. Wearing heels at that! She grabbed both of my hands and has me jumping up and down with her and we are both giggling.
"Why are we jumping up and down? I'm going to throw up again, if I don't stop." She immediately stops and gives me a big hug.
"Oh, I'm so sorry. You just don't understand how happy you've made me! By next summer, I won't only have 3 grandbabies, but 4! I always wished for twins, because my father was a twin and it ran in the family, but twin grandbabies are just as good! Maybe even better!"
"Oh boy! So, it's YOUR fault I'm carrying twins! Which also means its Cash’s fault! Hmmm. When I tell him I guess I can use this little tidbit of information to my advantage!"
"Yes, twins run in my family. I even have cousins that are twins. Okay, honey. I will keep this secret for you until after the holidays, but you make sure you eat when you're hungry and get plenty of rest and take your vitamins. The number one priority here is the babies, and you have to take care of yourself first to take care of them. If you need me there when you tell him, just let me know and I'll be there in a heartbeat. Does anyone else know?" Oh, she is going to be such a wonderful mother-in-law one day. If that ever happens, after Cash finds out I've betrayed him.
"Just Claudia. She will defend me to her death, before she spills the beans, even though she isn't crazy about me keeping it from Cash."
"Well honey, you are carrying my grandbabies and I already consider you my daughter-in-law and even though we are getting to know each other, I will defend you to the death as well. I'm the only mother you have here to protect you. Are you going to tell your parents?" I shake my head no and she questions me with a look.
"I know. I should tell them, but my mom is already afraid I've jumped in to fast with Cash and honestly, I feel like I'm betraying him by Claudia and now you, knowing about it before him. When I tell him, then I'll tell them as well."
"I understand. I do want you to know that even though you are lying to my son, I understand why and I do admire you for protecting my grandbabies. The last thing they need is for you to be fighting with Cash and getting more stressed out than you already are. If you need someone to lean on Sweetie, you call me, okay?" She gives me another hug; a more tender, loving and warm embrace.
"Thank you for understanding and I will. Thank you so much. I don't think I have anything on my stomach to throw up, so are you ready to look at the dresses again?" I never thought I'd have a heart to heart conversation in a public restroom, which has me giggling.
"Oh, yes. We need dresses! I got distracted with all of the baby news! Okay. Let’s go find you something that will make your eyes pop!"
We both found us gorgeous gowns and an adorable baby blue dress for Eden to match mine and a tuxedo for Gideon. Amelia made sure to feed me for lunch and I pigged out and had to stop before we got home for me to throw up on the side of the road, because there was no time to stop anywhere else.
Hanging out with her was as fun as hanging out with Claudia, and it was great to feel like I had another friend to lean on to give Claudia a break now and then. I would never tell my mother this, but Amelia acts way younger than her age, where my mother acts her age with her traditions and values.
When we get back to the house, Cash is waiting for us in the living room with his laptop sitting in his lap. He sees us walk in and immediately gets up to greet us.
"Did you two have fun today? It sure sounds like it by the giggling that I heard coming through the door." He reaches down to give his mother a kiss on the cheek and then gives me a quick kiss.
"Oh, Cash! I think I'm just as much in love with Olivia as you are. We had such a great day. I think I'm going to adopt her if you don't marry her. Either way, she WILL be my daughter."
"Oh, Mother. You heard what I told Gideon. Let me ask her first, okay?" He's chuckling and he puts his arm around me and kisses me on the temple.
"Well hurry up. I'm ready for some more grandchildren. I think I'm getting the baby blues again. Eden and Gideon are still adorable, but I miss that baby smell and cuddling up in a rocker with a newborn." I tense up. Where is she going with this? Why would she bring this up after I asked her not to?
"I'm sorry Mother, but you need to put a rush on Caleb, because you won't be getting anymore grandbabies from us. Liv and I already agreed that Gideon and Eden were enough for us. Isn't that right, Liv?"
I stay straight faced and put a smile on my face and nod at him, but inside my heart has broken in two. I want to run away and hide somewhere and bawl. He definitely hasn't changed his mind and the look that Amelia gave me, lets me know that she was just feeling him out and that my secret was safe with her.
"Oh, that's ridiculous! You're both still young enough to have more. I always wanted a couple more children, but after my hysterectomy after your brother was born that was it for me."
"Mother, I'm not budging on this and I explained why to Liv and I shouldn't have to explain why to you about why I feel the way I do. As a matter of fact, I've been debating on getting a vasectomy. What do you think, Liv? That way you won't have to get put on birth control and I'm getting sick of using condoms! Sorry, Mother. I guess this should have been a more private conversation, but you did bring it up." Amelia's mouth dropped and then she closed it.
"Well, if that's what you two plan to do, then I guess I'll start working on Caleb! Too bad Claudia is a lesbian, because those two would make some beautiful babies together. Oh, well. Thank you so much Olivia for going with me today. I had a blast! We have to do it another time." She gives me a hug and kiss goodbye and hugs Cash and leaves. Cash looks over at me and grins.
"Oh boy! I feel sorry for Caleb, because Mother is like a pit bull when she puts her mind onto something. Do you think we should have told her that Claudia's not gay? Haha. Nah. I'll let Caleb tell her. Are you hungry? Dinner is about ready. I'm going to go get the kids, okay?"
"Okay. I'm going to run to the bathroom real quick." To empty my stomach. Again!
Amelia a pit bull? Maybe, but he is as well and he sure as hell got it from her. He is going to kill me when I tell him about the babies. He's going to be furious. I'll have to move out! There's no way he's going to let me stay, while he counts down the days to my death. It could be the end of our relationship. My heart is absolutely breaking. Again! How much can a heart take in one lifetime?
CHAPTER TWENTY
It is Christmas morning and the living room has been destroyed by everyone opening their presents. Everyone went all out in giving the kids their best Christmas ever and by the look on their smiling faces, I would have to say mission accomplished.
Where we are going to put everything that they got will be a chore, because their playroom and closets are already full. Maybe next week the kids and I can go through their old toys and donate some to charity. It will show them how to give to the less fortunate and make room for all of their new stuff.
I'm looking around at everyone and Claudia and Caleb are snuggled up on one of the big couches, whispering to each other. I'm laughing inwardly, because she thinks she's perfectly safe, heart wise, with Caleb, but I can tell how she feels about him and he's obviously still crazy about her.
Amelia and Gideon are snuggled up in the big chair, laughing and talking to the kids, while cash and I are snuggled up close on the other couch just watching it all. He is looking down at me while he grins.
"Pretty good Christmas, huh? Are you feeling better? I hate that you weren't able to go to the Christmas party. You haven't had any luck this year with that stomach bug that keeps going around. I'm just glad that the kids haven't caught it again."
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