Surveying the rest of the space, a flash of red in her closet caught his attention. He pushed the sliding door open. His football jersey—she’d kept it. He took it off the hanger and turned it from front to back. The torn material reminded him of the days on the battlefield. He’d played football all through high school. He remembered the night he gave her the shirt. He’d graduated from high school and she’d teased him about going to college, possibly forgetting her. He’d tried convincing her it wouldn’t happen.
Laughing, he shook his head in thought. If he’d had a long enough rope, he’d have pulled the moon down out of the sky for her. All he had to give back then was his heart—and the clothes on his back. He had pulled the jersey off and handed it to her on that steamy summer night, with a promise that his love belonged to her. How stupid could he have been? No young boy knows what he wants, or whom he wants to be with for the rest of his days.
He’d known. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself otherwise, he knew beyond any doubt that Holly had been the one. He couldn’t even deny he wished things had gone differently for them .
Because she broke his heart, and it’d never mended, he could never…would never forgive her.
* * * *
Holly sat on the chair waiting while Liam investigated the house. She heard his footsteps on the second floor as he moved from one room to another. He seemed to linger a little longer in her bedroom. Realizing she should have removed all of the pictures and his things, came a little too late.
When he returned, his jaw was set at a tight angle and his gaze was distant.
“You didn’t find anything?” she asked. “Nothing to prove that you had an intruder.”
“I know what I saw, Liam,” she stated.
“I know what you thought you saw,” he said.
“Do you think I’m making this up? The rock through the window. The shadow upstairs. The door opening and closing. Maybe I’m haunted by a ghost.”
“A ghost? Are you serious?” he asked.
“Something isn’t right, obviously.” She hesitated, wondering if she should tell him about the book. What did she have to lose? “When I got here, I looked all over for Grandma’s journal. I didn’t find it. Tonight, I found it on her bedroom floor, right in the open. Did I imagine the book?” She grabbed it off the coffee table and waved it, then set it back down.
“You were upset when you arrived—”
“I’m not delusional, Lem. You know me.”
His expression hardened. “I don’t know you. At least not anymore.”
“I thought we agreed to let the past stay where it belonged.”
“Interesting you’d suggest letting it all go when you live in a temple dedicated to the past. I didn’t agree to anything and I don’t make promises that I don’t intend to keep.”
Standing, she clenched her hands into fists. Every nerve in her body sparked alive as she absorbed his words. “I am sick of this. You act as if I’m the devil’s spawn because I chose to leave this place. You have no clue why I left but you want to run me through the coals every chance you get.” Tears blurred her vision. She forced the wetness away. “Well, go ahead, run me through the wringer all you want. There are some things you’re never going to understand.”
In three quick strides, he crossed the distance between them. Fire lit his dark eyes and resentment marked his expression. “How dare you come back here! Who the hell do you think you are? No one wants you here. Especially not me.”
“Who the hell do you think you are? Being Chief of Police doesn’t make you king. Not everyone in this town holds a grudge or is broken hearted. After all, when you married Tiffany, you made our promises null and void.” She treaded down an unsafe path, she knew, yet there was no stopping the overpowering need to set things straight. If he wanted to pick a fight, she’d give him one to remember.
“Don’t mention my marriage. You don’t know everything either. I realize you’d like to turn the blame on me, but you didn’t see me sneaking away like a thief in the middle of the night.”
“It’s not about who’s to blame. I believe a man who truly loves a woman doesn’t turn around and marry another a few months later. Did you think of the consequences? Did you realize it felt like a slap in my face? The difference is, I don’t walk around with a mountain-sized chip on my shoulder and taking it out on everyone around me.” Before she thought of her actions, she stabbed her finger into the middle of his brawny chest. He took another small step and she dropped her hand to her side. His heat engulfed her.
“You left. No goodbye. No reason.” His voice was dangerously low. The area around one eye flinched.
“You’re a broken record.” She could have screamed, but instead she only managed a whisper. “We can’t keep going over this. I want to stay in Raven but it seems everything is working against me. Ghost, teens, whoever they are. Is it possible just once I can get a break? You can imagine why I disappeared. If only you’d understand—”
“Stop rambling.”
She lifted her chin and looked at him. He pulled her hard against his solid body and drove his mouth down on hers with the intensity of a starved man. At first, his kiss lacked of tenderness and caring, but that changed. He forced her lips open and slid his tongue into her mouth, tasting her. She knew he wanted to prove a point and he used seduction and masculinity as a weapon. With her balled fists, she pounded his burly chest but gave little effort in pushing him away. His taste of mint and man melted her barrier. Every muscle in her body pulsated. Her nipples tingled and she could feel them bead against the material of her top.
Passion had buried itself within her bones long ago and it lured her with stunning temptation. Each painful beat of her heart called his name, begging for release from years of torment. She couldn’t resist the sweet agony or urge. She’d become a demon’s lust as her inner thighs throbbed. To deny it would be to cut her heart out because that’s where her feelings for Liam were hidden. Every beat pumped poison through her veins. He was a drug, the worst possible kind.
Struggling was useless. She’d rather breathe one last breath in his arms than breathe a billion more without him.
She slowly brought her arms around his neck, molding her body against his. His muscles relaxed and he felt like the old Liam, yet different somehow. He’d never been this bold or aggressive, and she couldn’t remember ever wanting him this much. Brawnier and manlier, he’d become the man she’d dreamt of night after night—the hero who swept in and demanded her love. She’d cried into her pillow aching for him for the last ten years. Now, the way he roped her into his tantalizing web, he knew exactly what she wanted. Only he could gratify the longing that pooled inside her core.
Smoothing her hand down his muscular back, she came to the waistband and dipped her fingers inside. Lowering her hand past his boxers, she cupped his firm ass.
He grabbed her wrist and tugged her hand away. Cold slipped in between them as he moved backward. Seconds passed as his rejection invaded her sex-induced brain.
Holly stared up at him in confusion. His lips were moist from their kiss and his eyes were like beacons of desire. He had all the physical signs of a man ready to satiate a woman’s needs. She couldn’t understand. “What’s wrong?” she murmured.
“We—we can’t do this.” He took several more steps back, which seemed like an ocean’s length away. He swiped the back of his hand across his lips, as if he could wipe away any memory of what they shared.
Her breathing was ragged, and her mind clouded. “I…I…well, okay.”
His chest rose and lowered. He looked like a ravenous man who denied himself the pleasure of food. After a moment of tense silence, he finally said, “I’ll stay outside just to keep an eye on things.” He stomped toward the door, but didn’t leave.
Holly plopped down onto the couch. She brought her hand up to her warm, swollen lips. What had just happened? They had lost a control, that’s all. He didn’t like her much. She liked him…a lot. One-sided e
motions were never good. “You can go home, Liam. I’m a big girl and would rather not have a sitter.” She didn’t want or need his pity party. She’d rather lick her wounds in private.
He chuckled. “Sometimes even big girls need help. If I leave and something happened, what would that say for my skills?”
“Is that what you’re worried about? I guess you have a reputation to uphold. What would townspeople think seeing your truck parked in front of my house overnight?” Holly hadn’t forgotten how the words of the people of Raven could cut like a dull knife. Some folks didn’t care if the words had a grain of truth just as long as it took the heat off their actions. She’d been the focus of many rumors. However, people liked her grandma and knew they’d have hell to pay if they crossed her, and that meant causing Holly pain. Liam’s pause warned her that it had crossed his mind too.
“It’s my duty to protect the citizens of the town. I’d do the same for anyone.”
Disappointment embedded itself deeper inside of her. She wanted to kick herself in the spleen for believing, even for a second, that he stayed for any other reason than his duty as an officer of the law. Of course, he’d do this for anyone in town. He was the chief, after all. “You have the choice to either leave or stay inside. You’re not sleeping in your vehicle. Heaven forbid I prevent you from a night’s rest.”
“I’ll be just fine in the car,” he said.
“Then you should head home,” she reiterated.
“Damn! If I want to stay outside, I can.” He looked at her. His eyes gleamed.
“Are you afraid that we can’t keep our hands off one another if you stay?” She pushed the limitations with the question considering they’d just tampered with personal boundaries. The best thing would be staying the hell away from any conversation regarding sex, but if they didn’t face the evil, how could they get over the ties that bound them?
“Some.” He shrugged.
He’d always been honest, she’d give him that. “What if I pinky promise that I’ll keep my hands off you? If you so much as get a twinkle in your eye, I’ll cuff you to the stair post. Would that work?” She lifted one brow.
“We haven’t pinky promised since we were kids. It didn’t do much good back then either.” He shook his head as if he were in a dilemma to shoot or not shoot--with his real gun.
“Once upon a time we couldn’t resist each other. I’ll never forget all of the firsts we shared. All of the games we played,” she said. He’d been her lover, best friend and biggest supporter, and she’d given it all up.
“Problem is, we’re not kids anymore. Every choice we make has consequences.”
“Are we still talking about you staying inside the house? It sure feels like we’re questioning whether we should have sex or not.”
He nodded. “I guess it does seem that way.”
“Yeah, the benefits of sex would certainly outweigh the negatives. After all, neither of us had many skills back when I was eighteen, although the memory still makes me flush.” She laughed, but the flames of desire licked her inner thighs.
“Sounds like you’re selling the idea,” he said.
“I’m only saying, what would making love be like? It was good then. I bet it’d be mind-blowing now.”
He rubbed his jaw and shuffled his feet. “Are you teasing me to see if I’ll cave and fall back into the same situation when I couldn’t see the warning signs until it was too late.”
“Warning signs?”
“Your lack of commitment. You always seemed imprisoned to this town, to me,” he said.
“I can’t deny that I’d felt smothered here, but it wasn’t you. Now, it’s not the same for me. Although it’s been chaotic, I feel a sense of freedom I lacked before.” She sighed. “You kissed me and it was nice. We have a connection. Wouldn’t you agree? When I’m around you, all of those old feelings come rushing in. We were once best friends. It’s kind of hard to forget.” She needed to say something, even if it put her in a vulnerable position.
“Our lives have changed, we’ve changed. There is no going back.” He swept a hand over his short hair. When he had longer hair, she’d run her fingers through the silky locks and cling to it when he was between her legs. The very spot where he’d once licked now quivered in memory.
Times had indeed changed. Oh man had they changed. He was no longer that boy running around in unruliness, or trying out ways to please her. Had it really been ten years since he’d touched her like she was the only woman in the world? She’d been his, heart and soul.
Until he married another woman…
A pain shot through her chest. Letting the hurt go was necessary, but difficult. She hoped to get to know him again and that’d take work. Was it even possible?
This drove her to say, “You’re right. We can’t go back. Although sometimes it’d be great to have a second chance. For now, let’s bury the hatchet. Sleep on the couch, because if you don’t, I’ll sleep in your truck too. Imagine the talk of the town then.”
* * * *
Liam realized he could have been making the biggest mistake of his life, but what choice did he have? He didn’t want to spend the night in his truck, especially with Holly next to him, and he couldn’t leave her. And over his dead body would he allow someone to hurt her. So, here he was, inside the house, sleeping on the couch.
When he’d agreed to stay, she’d said goodnight and left him alone. A part of him ached to follow her up the stairs and find out if she still purred like a kitten when he touched her. He wouldn’t want to stop right there though. He’d want to ask her if she ate pizza every Friday night and if her favorite color was yellow. Did she still believe in magic? He’d want to explore every part of her, not just with his hands, but with his heart.
Rolling over on the hard sofa, he caught himself before he slipped off the side. Damn! The shitty thing wasn’t meant for a man his size.
He buried his face into the pillow and moaned. Bringing his head up, he listened for any noise. He couldn’t hear a thing upstairs, but his imagination drew conclusions to every pop and crack in the old wooden floor. With each sound, he attached it to something Holly was doing. Did she toss and turn? Maybe talking in her sleep? Dreaming about him? Hell, was she even asleep?
He pounded the pillow and wished sleep would come and ease his torment.
What the hell was wrong with him? He needed a good ass kicking, or maybe ten laps around the school track where he ran most mornings. Getting a handle on his secret cravings for the woman upstairs meant survival. Holly had left him ten years ago, but she didn’t just leave—she destroyed him. He’d never wanted anything more than her and their life together. He’d been a fool, but he’d grown up and built a thick wall of protection. He shouldn’t have any feelings, anger or otherwise, left for her. Yet, something remained. Fuck. A lot remained.
He wanted to talk to Holly about his marriage. It wasn’t what people thought. He should have told her the truth, yet maybe he wasn’t ready to tell her that he hadn’t married Tiffany out of spite, or even love. He’d married her because she’d gotten pregnant by another man who’d run off when she told him the news. Fearing what people would think of her, she asked Liam to marry her.
Tiffany had been there for him while he grieved over Holly. Tiffany had listened while he vented, and he’d done the same for her. He’d wanted to help her in some way. At the time she’d suggested getting hitched, he hadn’t cared much about anything.
Liam unwillingly looked at the staircase that led to satisfaction. “Hell, no!” He closed his eyes and forced the deep needful urges to disappear.
Rolling again, the couch seemed to get lumpier. His adrenaline raised the roof and his hard on made it difficult to find a comfortable position.
Oh well, he wasn’t going to get any sleep tonight. He may as well face it.
CHAPTER FIVE
HOLLY FELT A sliver of guilt as she stood next to the couch watching Liam. His breathing was heavy and his mouth hung open. His arms were h
igh over his head and his legs stretched out, hanging over the arm. The blanket had fallen onto the floor.
The view was nice, definitely a morning pick-me-up.
She should feel shame staring at his tented boxers, yet she didn’t stop looking. She appreciated his morning hard on, but it meant something completely different when it looked this good. If he grew anymore, he was bound to rip a hole in the cotton material. He had a nice cock, no doubt about it. He’d matured in many ways.
The vixen creature within her listed ways she could wake a sleeping man. After all, he was primed and ready to use the gift of nature. It’d been a while since she’d slept with a man and standing here now, he made her miss naughty play. In fact, she was beginning to feel sensation in places on her body that she’d forgotten existed.
He stretched and moaned and she saw skin—silky, tight, tan skin. He’d finally broken through the flap of his underwear like she knew would happen, maybe even hoped. She gulped air and turned away, regretfully. Wickedness wasn’t a bad thing, but if he caught her staring at his cock she’d never get over the mortification, or the fact she’d look like a dick stalker.
Tightening her grip on the coffee mug, she forced her vocal chords to work, “Liam?”
He moaned.
“Liam?” she said louder. She wasn’t looking, so she wasn’t sure if his eyes were open yet and couldn’t check because it wouldn’t be his eyes she’d be looking at.
“Oh fuck,” he grumbled. She bit her lower lip to keep from laughing as she heard the crackle of cushions.
“Is it safe to turn around?” she asked.
“You’re asking now?”
How did he know her so well? She turned. “I have no clue what you mean.” Her gaze involuntarily dropped to his lap. The thick blanket did its job in hiding his package, but she had a lucid memory and she wouldn’t forget any time soon. It took all of the control she could muster not to lick her lips. “I came with an offering.” Handing him one of the mugs of coffee, she could think of another way to make peace…
“Thanks.” He took it. “This doesn’t relieve you of any guilt. I see it in your eyes.” He held her gaze for a long moment before he took a sip.
Sin With Cuffs Page 4
