by Reid, Angela
“Cade, I can’t just NOT go to my job for an unspecified amount of time. They won’t hold my position indefinitely. I have a house and a car payment, plus a host of other bills. How can I possibly miss that much work? My savings account is not adequate to cover more than a month or two at best. Matt’s funeral …” I nearly choked out the last words. The tears kept coming, and I wiped my eyes on a McDonald’s napkin, the coarseness like sandpaper on tender flesh.
“If you need financial assistance, Miss Meyers, we have programs available to help you. We are offering our protection to you merely as a courtesy. You are not technically in our custody,” said Agent Roberts, no emotion on his face. “You retain the legal right to decline our services, but as Agent Cantrell explained, you may be risking your life, as well as others, by doing so.”
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t want to see anything happen to anyone else. Matt’s demise consumed me with guilt, and I excused myself to the bathroom, not wanting to break down again in front of Cade and the devoid personality of Agent Roberts.
As I sat on the toilet seat for nearly an hour, letting the wet pearls of pain drain like waterfalls down a mountainside, I was fighting the urge to throw up again, knowing this time it wasn’t the flu; it was heart sickness. I’d been there before, when I thought Cade died.
A sharp rap on the door startled me. “Ellia,” said Cade. “If you are coming with us, we need to move. Agent Roberts has a vehicle waiting.” He sounded robotic and cold as if I was nothing to him. He treated me as his job, not a real person. And isn’t that what you are to him now—just a job? Don’t ever fool yourself into believing he cares about you, Ellia. He never did and he never will. My inner voice was right, I was a means to an end for Cade Cantrell and nothing more. I blew my nose and decided I didn’t want to be a ward of the FBI or anyone else. I would just disappear on my own.
“Leave. I’ll take my chances on my own,” I said through the door. Terror at the thought of being left without any protection gnawed at my nerves, but I couldn’t bear being around Cade anymore.
“Ellia,” he growled, his monotonic tone replaced by anger. “Don’t be stupid. You are staying in custody even if I have to tie you up and drag you the car. This isn’t just about you, so stop being so fucking selfish.”
“I am the selfish one?” I screamed through the cheap bathroom door. “You take the blue ribbon and the grand champion trophy in that department.” I was so angry I wanted to punch him. Creating a scene would not help matters or change a single thing. It would only draw attention to us. My head was all over the place.
“Please, Ellia.” His tone dropped to a hushed whisper, and I had to strain to hear. “Just let me keep you safe. I don’t want to fight you on this. We need to leave.”
“Fine, I will go with you for now. God forbid I be selfish,” I said as I yanked the door open, nearly causing him to tumble in on me, but catching his balance at the last second. I brushed past him and shoved my toiletries and dirty clothes into my bag like they were the enemy. I could sense his eyes on me, but I refused to look at him. “You still owe me a lot of answers.”
“That I do, Ellia, and I will try to answer them for you. Right now we need to go, though. We have a safe house secured and should reach it by this afternoon. We can talk along the way,” he said, moving to the door and opening it for me. I could see Roberts behind the wheel of a Suburban. I brushed past Cade once again and flung my bag, and then myself, into the back seat. To my surprise he got in next to me. We rode in silence for the first thirty miles before he spoke to me again. “Where do you want me start?”
I seized the opportunity. “What really happened that night in Detroit? I went to watch you play, and then I helped you and the guys tear down the equipment. We were getting ready to leave when a car rolled up and fired a gun at us. You stepped in front of me and took two bullets to the chest. I’ve lived with that guilt for so long, and finding out it was all just a big fat joke on me, makes me hate you.” The memory was so painful, it stole my breath, and I gasped to gain control. My hands were clenched into tight fists, and I wanted to beat him and force him to feel my pain. The tears returned as my recollections came out of hiding. “You were bleeding so much and … and I … I didn’t know what to do. I was screaming for help, and your band-mates were there, and then the police. You were unconscious by then, and blood was running out of your mouth—so much blood.” I was crying so hard, my shoulders popped up and down with violent effort. “I remember my dad showed up and drove me to the hospital. We followed the ambulance with his lights making the world seem all red and blue. The siren screamed—or maybe it was me, I can’t remember. I waited what seemed like forever, all alone in that waiting room, but no nurses or doctors ever came to tell me anything. When my dad returned he told me you were dead.” I sobbed and rammed my fists into my temples, rocking back and forth, wanting the pain to go away. I still couldn’t control my emotions, even after ten long years. “But you weren’t dead. This pain … it’s all for nothing. My entire life is a fucking lie.”
Surprising me, he pulled me into an embrace and held me while stroking my messy hair. “Ellia, Jesus, I am so sorry. I didn’t hear until the next day what they told you. My very first instinct was to run to you, but I was stuck in a hospital bed with tubes hanging out of my chest. They took my phone away and had people guarding me around the clock. I was desperate to tell you it was all a lie, but then I found out the truth. I had to let you believe I was dead. It was the only way to keep you safe.” Once I stopped shaking, he let go of me and got a tissue for my river of snot. “It wasn’t easy for me either, I hope you understand that.”
“Well, then why, dammit!” I yelled into the space between us. My emotions swung back into the anger zone. “Tell me this story of yours, Cade. Explain to me how leaving could’ve been your only choice. Your death left me in a place that was so dark I never thought I’d recover. It destroyed me. What was so dangerous that you could ever justify shattering me so completely … huh?”
He was quiet at first, looking out the window and gathering his words. “My dad was the president of The Blackballers, a motorcycle club in Detroit. The group was involved in serious criminal activity--drugs, guns, human trafficking, money laundering, you name it. The club worked under the Camerson Cartel, an assemblage of powerful businessmen and politicians who made millions of dollars, on the side, through illegals prospects. Thomas Camerson headed the crime syndicate, and he suspected my father’s club of skimming profits. Camerson was angry and decided to punish my father. He ordered the hit on my mom, at least that’s what we believed in the beginning.”
Cade exhaled and pulled his hand through his hair, as if agitated by having to explain things to me. “My dad, and the club as a whole, were old-school thinkers. You know, ‘Mess with me but don’t mess with my family,’ type of men. It was the one line they would never cross in settling scores with their enemies. Camerson traversed that line and put the club on notice. My dad wouldn’t stand for it and sought revenge. As cruel as my father might have been outside the home, he was a good husband to my mom and a great dad. I never even learned what he did for a living until I was older. He loved my mom and I more than anything, and someone was going to pay for her death.”
Cade cleared his throat and continued. “My dad went after Camerson and managed to trap him alone in a hotel room one night. He tortured Camerson for hours before killing him slowly. My dad thought the crooked cops he worked with would protect him, help him cover up the crime, but they didn’t. He was convicted and sentenced to life in prison. The act set off a war between the club and cartel. Camerson’s son, Rodney, took over the business, and he went on a head hunt. The guy started by killing off all the family members of the Blackballers. He had innocent woman and children kidnapped, tortured, raped, and murdered, sending body parts back to the club. Unbeknownst to me, I was a huge target for Camerson Jr. He planned to make my death quite a spectacle to get even with my dad, and then he’d
take my dad out once he felt the suffering was sufficient. My father arranged to have me sent up north. My mom had a half-sister that no one knew existed, so he paid her almost a million dollars to take me in and protect me until I graduated. The police felt I didn’t need true protective custody since I wasn’t particularly important in the bigger scheme of things. They never even changed my name, which blows my mind now that I know how sick these people are. Had he been looking, Camerson could’ve easily found me up north. I didn’t find out the real reason I was sent to live with my aunt and uncle until after the shooting.”
He turned to look at me. “I got damn lucky, Ellia, that he was busy with other things. We could’ve both been killed. When I came back to Detroit to play with the band, Camerson got word I had resurfaced. Though the Blackballers were reduced to minimal numbers by then, and my dad was rotting in prison, Camerson couldn’t resist following through with the last of his vendetta. He came after me that night.”
Cade stopped talking and looked out the window again, his mind traveling the road to the past; the same path I took care to avoid. “When I was in the hospital, the police, along with the club, decided it was best to let Camerson think that I was dead. If he found out I survived, he might come after me again. Your dad convinced me I needed to let you believe the same thing because Camerson wouldn’t hesitate to kill you, too. I had several choices to ponder. I could go back up north and hope Camerson didn’t come around, or I could pack up my stuff and take you on the run with me. Either of those options kept you and your family in potential danger. I was seventeen with no money and no way to take care of you, Ellia. I couldn’t stand the thought of ruining your future or costing you your life. My other choice was to join up with the Blackballers. They were heavily recruiting to recoup their numbers, and they were biding time before going after Camerson. Revenge for the murders became the sole purpose of my father’s club. This thing was never going to end if I took that route. Instead, I decided to do things the legal way. I made a promise to myself that I would see these men pay for what they had done. I changed my name while I went to a private college, and then I joined the police academy. During that time, my dad was murdered in prison—stabbed through the heart while he slept. His death made me more determined in my career path, and I was recruited by the FBI to work in their organized crime division. I took my name back after I was securely inside the Bureau. When these fuckers go to prison, I want them to know who helped put them there.”
“How does my father figure into this? I mean you said he was part of the plan to protect me. Is that what you meant when you said he ruined your life?”
To my surprise, Cade reached over and took my hand. “That’s the hard part, Ellia. Your dad has no idea I am with the FBI. He doesn’t have a clue I am coming for him. I don’t know what he thinks became of me, but he never went looking, which worked in my favor. Through our investigation, we learned that your dad concocted the entire conflict between the Blackballers and Camerson. The cartel paid him big money to keep their crimes buried. The club also paid him hush money, unbeknownst to Camerson. Your dad was working both sides. He’s a greedy man, though, and he was the one skimming extra profit from the cartel. Camerson became suspicious of him, so your dad had to cover his ass.” Cade stopped and exhaled. I could feel the tension building in him. “Your dad is the one who murdered my mother, by his own hand, and started this war. He made it look like Camerson was behind it while also managing to have it ruled a suicide by the police. Bradley Meyers is the cause for the loss of countless innocent lives. Your fucking dad is the reason I had to leave you.” He tossed my hand at me like it was toxic and crossed his arms. The hate radiated off of him, and I wondered why he even bothered to protect me. I was the daughter of a demon.
Shock and devastation registered all over again. How could I be related to a man capable of such unimaginable atrocities, yet there it was, the truth I’d begged him to tell me. Cade continued. “Your father is still involved with the cartel, like I already told you. They were working a big arms deal with the Austrian mafia, and a whole new war is about to erupt if these men don’t get paid. You are a link to your dad, and that’s why they want you. It’s why the FBI wants you, too. Meyers needs to be brought to justice.”
“What about Sam and my mom?” I asked. I saw Agent Roberts look at Cade in the review mirror.
Cade shook his head, exhaled, and looked out the window. “We have not heard anything. The people we have working this case on the inside have been unable to acquire any information regarding their whereabouts. I will tell you as soon as we receive any news.”
“Shit,” said Roberts from the front seat.
“What is it?” asked Cade.
“We’ve got a tail.”
Cade turned around and looked out the back window as Roberts sped up the SUV. The black truck behind us also accelerated, nearly kissing our rear bumper.
“Keep your seat belt on, Ellia, but get down below the windows,” ordered Cade, just as the back window of the SUV shattered. Someone was shooting at us.
Chapter 6
The talent show had been a turning point for Cade at school. He became an even greater local celebrity with the girls and each was determined to heal his wounded soul. The flirting annoyed me, and I couldn’t wait to graduate. I didn’t want to share Cade with anyone, and my jealousy and insecurities were often the catalyst for the few arguments we ever had. Cade seemed oblivious to the overt actions of the groupies that followed him like children with the pied piper. He always kept me at the center of his world even when I got mired down in anxiety about losing him to someone else. Even his cousin Jimmy stopped harassing him, knowing full well that Cade had enough ability to achieve the dream of becoming a professional musician.
As homecoming approached, Maria, on behalf of the student council, asked Cade if his band would play at the dance. “I will have to ask them,” he said. “We’ve played a lot of places but never a high school dance. It could be interesting. You do realize they are out of high school, right? You freaked out over my two tattoos and ear piercings,” he laughed. “Wait ‘til you see these guys.”
“Well, if they are as cute as you, I’m sure we can overlook the rest.” She laughed and smiled at Cade with that come hither stare all the girls gave him. “May I get a copy of your demo music to play for Mrs. Cash? She ultimately has to approve it. I mean, personally, I don’t care about your band being older, but I will inform Mrs. Cash.”
Maria’s flirting with Cade was blatant, and I wondered how Will would feel about such a display. She and Will were officially dating, even though no one had bothered to tell me. I heard about it from a gossipy sophomore girl in the school bathroom. She also informed me Maria and Will hooked-up at parties, long before our separation, and I should’ve been angry at then both for the betrayal. I wasn’t. Maria having sex with Will kept him off me, so in a way, I looked at it as a favor. I never told Maria I’d found out about her and Will’s deception; I didn’t see the point in making things awkward. My group of friends no longer existed for me outside of school, anyway. The only thing I cared about was Cade. I obsessed on him and might have been classified a stalker if he didn’t seem to share the same preoccupation with me.
Cade brought in a CD for Maria the next day. It looked professional. “Wow,” she said. “This looks like the real deal you would buy at the store. Do you sell these?”
“We have in the past,” he said. “Brax, our bass player, works in the music industry and got us a recording session in a studio. We all pitched in some money to have the cover made. We recorded around fifteen-hundred copies, and we still have about three-hundred left.” He chuckled. “We over-estimated our fans, I guess.”
“You should bring them to sell at the dance. What a great way to get your name out there and share your music. These things will be worth a ton of money when you are famous.” She put her hand on his arm. It looked like an invitation to something, and I wanted to rip her red nails out their beds
.
“I’ll see what the guys wants to do,” he said laughing and moving his appendage out from under her claw.
Mrs. Cash approved the band, once Cade explained that they would edit any explicit lyrics to make the music school appropriate. Cade, after a lot of begging, got the green light from his band members. They didn’t play high school dances, finding it beneath them, but he managed to persuade them. He was so excited, he couldn’t stop talking about it. He missed his band and couldn’t wait to re-connect with them.
Maria and Ashley invited me to go dress shopping with them which I almost declined. Cade convinced me to tag along with them, and I figured it was to avoid having to escort me himself. Expecting the day with my old gal pals to be awkward, I was pleasantly surprised when we ended up having a great time. Maria fessed up about her liaisons with Will when he was still technically mine, apologizing profusely, and I forgave her. It was that easy.
The sexy dress, Maria and Ashley insisted I buy, was a success, judging by Cade’s reaction the night of the dance. When he arrived to collect me, his eyes lit up, and a smile covered his face. “You are absolutely gorgeous, Ellia” he said, holding back on the kiss we both wanted to share. My mother was standing there with a camera in hand.
“You look very nice too, Cade,” my mom gushed. “Even with all those earrings, you are dashing in a suit.”
Cade laughed. “Thanks, Mrs. Meyers.”
My mother took pictures of us until I finally told her that was enough, we had to go. Cade left his motorcycle in the driveway and drove my truck. Once we were away from the house and my mom’s prying eyes, he pulled over to the shoulder of the road. “You really do look beautiful,” he said, giving me the most longing gaze I’d ever seen. He kissed me sensually, making me want to rip off my dress and get busy with him right there on the side of the street. “I’m going to have a hard time concentrating on stage knowing you are out there in the crowd without me.”
