Broken Fairytales Series Box Set (Broken Fairytales, Buried Castles, Shattered Crowns)

by Monica Alexander

  “I love you,” I said, because after everything she’d just said, there weren’t any other words that were as appropriate.

  “I love you too, Zack,” she said, hugging me fiercely. “And I’m sorry I was selfish. I won’t do it again.”

  I shook my head. “Princess, you’ve been the least selfish person I know. Just the fact that you gave up your dream job to make half as much to do PR for Liar’s Edge simply because I didn’t want to be separated from you says so much about how not selfish you are.”

  She smirked at me. “That was so a two-way decision. I didn’t want to be separated from you. You just gave me a way for us to not have to do long distance. And quite honestly, this is my dream job. Being with you guys, promoting the band, helping you be successful. It’s been amazing.”

  “Okay, fine, I’ll give you that,” I said, smiling at her exuberance and the fact that she probably loved my band as much as I did. “But you’ve never even complained about having to watch Lily. You’ve let me go play rock star while you’ve watched her for the past week.”

  She shrugged. “I love her too, and don’t forget I was watching Lily way before you ever came along.”

  I laughed. “Okay, fine, but you don’t have to be so easy-going about it.”

  “Hello! Did you not hear me before, I’m exhausted. I love Lily, but she’s a friggin’ handful. She has more energy than the two of us put together, and she is a little dramatic these days if you haven’t noticed.”

  I sighed and shook my head. “She gets that from her mother.”

  Emily laughed. “Yeah, because her father isn’t one to overact at all,” she said sarcastically.

  “Whatever,” I said playfully.

  “It’s fine,” she said, tightening her arms around my waist and pulling me against her. “I still love you – even if you make me crazy sometimes – and you smoked.”

  I pulled back and looked at her. “I’m sorry,” I said sheepishly, because it wasn’t like I could deny it. The evidence was right there on the table. “I kind of hit a wall and needed one.”

  She sighed. “I know how you feel. Can I have one?”

  I raised an eyebrow at her.

  “Oh, don’t give me that look. I’ve had a stressful day too, and one won’t kill me, you big hypocrite.”

  I threw my hands up. “I’m not being a hypocrite,” I said. “I’m just surprised, that’s all.”

  I settled back in the chair I’d been sitting in and pulled Emily onto my lap before wordlessly handing her a cigarette and the lighter. And just for kicks, I took another one for myself, figuring it would be my last one for a long time.

  Then I held her, keeping one arm around her waist, finally feeling like I wasn’t alone. I never wanted to be alone again.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Andrew

  For as happy as I should have been seeing as Cole was flying in the next day, I felt like shit. Derrick’s jabs that had continued throughout the week had stuck with me and made me feel like what I was doing with Cole was wrong and dirty. And I hated that feeling. I’d run from it for so long, and now I just wanted to embrace it.

  I could tell patience was running thin for all of us, and maybe we all just needed a break from each other. The same jovial way we’d acted at the start of our tour wasn’t present like it used to be. And we were all exhausted.

  I knew the week between when we finished the album and started practicing for the tour would be good for all of us, and then maybe after some time apart, Derrick would come around. He’d stopped making blatant remarks about my sexuality in front of the Zack and Leo, but he said them under his breath when I walked by, or he just flat out looked at me like I had the plague. And it was slowly breaking me down

  My phone rang then, and I knew it was Cole before I even picked it up. It was nine o’clock, and I hadn’t yet heard from him. I knew he wouldn’t go a day without calling me. We were at that stage at the beginning of a relationship where just hearing the other person’s voice made you feel all giddy and warm and gooey inside.

  I so badly wanted to talk to him, but with where my head was at that night, I debated not answering the phone. I didn’t want to dump my problems on him. He obviously had friends who didn’t care that he was gay, and they didn’t judge him. His family even knew. I was still almost completely in the closet, and I had no plans of coming out to anyone else. Not even Jonathan needed to know as far as I was concerned.

  I knew he might figure it out, especially if Cole made it a habit to come visit me as often as I hoped he would while we were on tour, but I wasn’t going to flat out tell him. I’d only planned to tell the guys because they were my best friends, and I didn’t want to hide something this monumental from them. Now I sort of wished they didn’t know. I also wished I could tell my family that I’d met someone who made me so happy, but that wasn’t even an option.

  My mom and I were close. We talked regularly, and I had a good relationship with my dad even if we didn’t understand each other. They’d liked Jen, and they’d be disappointed to find out we were no longer together, but it wasn’t like I could tell them the truth. I’d known that going into this situation.

  “Hey,” I said, unable to hide the glumness in my voice when I answered the phone.

  “What’s wrong?” Cole asked immediately.

  I sighed and decided to just tell him what was up. I’d been holding back from telling him about Derrick’s reaction since I didn’t want to talk about it, but it had become too much.

  “Derrick found out about me a few days ago, we got into a fight, and he’s proceeded to call me all sorts of hateful things all week. He’s a fucking dick, and I hate him, but I just wish he’d be okay with this.”

  There. I’d said it. I was hurting because of Derrick, and as much as he bugged me, I just wanted us to be friends again.

  “I’m sorry, babe,” Cole said, his tone as soothing as I needed it to be. “Can I do anything? Want me to beat his ass?”

  It was a tempting thought. “No,” I said reluctantly. “I’m hoping that if I just give it time he’ll eventually come around.”

  “He might not,” Cole said honestly, and it was something I’d already considered. “Are you sure you still want to do this?”

  Damn, he was giving me an out. But I couldn’t take it. I’d tried for too long to fight this thing with him. I was finally happy. I wasn’t letting it go because Derrick couldn’t see past his own preconceptions. I honestly didn’t know what his problem was, but until I could calm down enough to talk to him about it, I’d just have to avoid him and deal with the insults and the names.

  “Of course I’m sure.”

  “Good, because I’m outside your room, and that would have been one wasted trip if you’d have broken up with me.”

  “You’re where?”

  A knock on the door had me shooting straight up in bed from where I’d been lounging back against the pillows. Cole chuckled into the phone.

  “Are you seriously here?” I asked as I made my way to the door. If he wasn’t there, I was going to kill whoever was on the other side of the door.

  I opened it to find Cole standing there, all blond hair, blue eyes and surfer boy smile, his dimples popping and his fitted blue t-shirt pulling taught across his broad chest.

  “Can I come in?” he asked, and his voice sounded even better in person, even though I could still hear it through the phone.

  A smiled worked its way onto my face. “Hell yeah.”

  Cole laughed as he pulled his phone from his ear and shoved it in his back pocket. He stepped across the threshold when I stepped back and let the door close behind us. I wondered for a second if Leo or Derrick had seen him, but I could only think about that for a second since the fact that Cole was standing in my room and I could smell his cologne was making me forget about everything else. He was exactly the distraction I needed.

  “Hey babe,” he said, grinning at me, as he dropped the duffel bag he was carrying to the ground.<
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  I should have hugged him. I should have done something to let him know I was happy to see him, because I really was. But I was suddenly frozen in place, nervous as all hell that he was there.

  When I didn’t move, he flopped down on the bed, and threaded his hands behind his head, all casual and sexy. I stood awkwardly near the end of the bed watching him watch me and mentally kicking myself because I wasn’t moving.

  I’d thought about what it would be like to see him in person again for almost two weeks. I’d been counting down the days until he was supposed to arrive. And maybe it was because he was a day early and I hadn’t been prepared to see him, or maybe it was just because he was so breathtakingly gorgeous in person, but I wasn’t sure what to do now that he was two feet from me.

  I knew I was just being stupid. We’d talked nightly for the past week and a half, for hours at a time. I’d told him things I’d never told anyone before. He knew almost everything about me, and I knew practically everything about him. I had no good reason to be nervous. But I was, and I think it was truthfully because now that I was seeing him in person, I knew just how much I wanted this thing between us to work out. Now that he was here, I just wanted him to stay. I didn’t want to do or say anything to screw up what we had.

  “Are you, um, hungry?” I asked nervously, going with the first thing I could think of.

  “Starving,” he said. “Want to go out? It would be our first date.”

  He smiled at me.

  How was he so calm?! My stomach had flipped over at the idea of a first date. I hadn’t been on one of those in a very long time, and it had been even longer since I went on one with someone who could turn me to mush as easily as he could. It would probably be a lot of fun to go out with him, but I knew I wasn’t ready for that, for us to go out together, on a date, in a city where I knew people.

  “Um, can we just order room service?” I asked, and because I think he knew where my head was at, he didn’t say anything about me wanting to stay in.

  “Sure. We can do that.”

  I smiled in relief, as I sat in the desk chair and picked up the room service menu. I scanned it, but I could feel eyes on me the whole time, so I wasn’t really processing what I was reading.

  “What are you in the mood for?” I asked Cole, looking up to find him watching me. No surprise there.

  Damn, why was I so freaked out? I wanted this. I wanted him. Shit, now that he was lying on my bed, I really wanted him.

  “You okay, Drew?” he asked.

  “Yeah, I’m good,” I answered, just as my voice cracked. Awesome. “Why?”

  “You sound anxious. Am I making you nervous?”

  Well, my heart was practically pounding out of my chest and I felt all hot, so yeah, nervous sounded about right.

  “Is it cool that I came a day early? Sean said he could handle things at work tomorrow, so I wanted to surprise you – sort of like you surprised me.”

  Cole owned a construction business with his friend Sean. I kind of liked that he worked with his hands. It was sexy. Part of me wanted to see him on a job site wearing a hard hat and carrying a hammer. Or maybe sitting on my bed wearing just a hard hat.

  Yeah, that image didn’t help my nerves one bit.

  I nodded my head. “I’m glad you came. This was a really good surprise.”

  “Then why are you sitting over there when I’m over here?”

  I looked at his bare feet that reached the end of the bed, close to where I was sitting. He’d kicked off his flip-flops before he laid down. I’d never really considered feet to be a sexy body part, but on him even they were a turn on.

  I swallowed nervously. “I thought you were hungry, that you wanted to order dinner?”

  “I do make you nervous, don’t I,” he said, not answering me.

  “I’m thinking about getting the prime rib. Do you feel like steak?”

  Two could play that game.

  “Salami sounds better,” he said, and my face instantly turned bright red. Cole was trying to keep a straight face, but he burst out laughing after a few seconds. “I cannot believe I just said that out loud. I’m really sorry. That was so inappropriate. It sounded better in my head, trust me.”

  I laughed with him, loving the wide smile on his face as he clutched his stomach.

  “I’m not offended,” I told him when he stopped laughing, glad the tension had been broken.

  “I know, and I hope you’re a little less nervous now.”

  I took a deep breath. “It’s been a while since I’ve done this.”

  “I remember the day well.”

  I blushed again, wondering when I’d started blushing. Seriously. Was I fifteen again?

  “Come here,” Cole said, scooting over to make room for me on the bed.

  I got up and tentatively walked over to him. He patted the space next to him, so I sat down.

  “Lay down,” he urged, and I hesitated.

  Cole reached for my hand and threaded our fingers together. “I’m really glad to see you, Andrew,” he said softly, his voice calming me further. “Talking on the phone has been good and all, but being able to hold your hand and look into your eyes, this is what I’ve been waiting for. I just want to be close to you. Where it goes from here is up to you.”

  “Okay,” I said, feeling like a complete pussy for being so skittish. It wasn’t like this was my first time, or even my first time with him, but I was glad he was okay with taking things slow.

  As soon as I laid down, Cole propped himself up on his elbow, so I turned my head to face him. He smoothed my hair back from my face.

  “Your hair’s different than it was last summer,” he commented.

  I nodded. “I’ve been wearing it messier, less product. It looks more rock ‘n roll this way, I think. Last summer I was doing the whole solo artist thing, so I wanted to look more emo, I guess.”

  “I think this suits you better. You could’ve easily passed for the sixth member of One Direction last summer. Now, not so much.”

  I smiled. “Nah, I’m not really the boy band type.”

  He returned my smile. I noticed his hand had lingered in my hair, and he was fingering the blond strands. My eyes met his and locked in place as he watched me, his smile fading to a more searing look.

  “I’m glad you’re here too, Cole. I know I said that before, but I mean it. I’ve wanted this for so long.”

  He smiled softly. “Me too. Can I kiss you?” he asked, and my stomach flipped.

  I’d been waiting over a year to kiss him again, and I couldn’t believe it was about to happen. When he’d been in my hotel room in Tampa, it had been such torture. Being that close to him and not touching, but now he was inches from me, and there was nothing holding us back.

  He didn’t wait for me to answer before he closed the distance between us and pressed his full lips to mine. It honestly felt like coming home. I remembered the feel of his lips from the first time we’d kissed, the pressure, the intensity, the connection. It all came rushing back in the span of a few seconds before I felt Cole’s tongue seeking entrance, and I opened my mouth to welcome him in.

  His hands held my head on either side as he took control of the kiss, shifting his body so it was half-covering mine. It happened so fast that I didn’t even have time to panic. I just let it happen, relishing in the closeness and the warmth of his strong body.

  Even though I could feel that he wanted to take things further, for my sake, he held back and closed out the kiss. I opened my eyes to see him still so close to me.

  “I’ve dreamed about doing that the longest time,” he said, his voice gravelly.

  “Me too,” I said, surprisingly breathless, but I was loving the weight of his body on mine, the clean lines and sharp angles and hard muscle. I was content to stay like that forever if I could, but as I gazed into his eyes, I knew I also wanted more.

  “I want to do it again,” he said hungrily.

  No arguments here.

  I nodded.
“Okay.”

  That time he was more aggressive, shifting his body so it covered mine more completely, and I could feel his erection pressing against my thigh. We were going to end up naked. I knew it. Neither of us was going to be able to stop once we got to a certain point, but I didn’t care. This was what I’d wanted, what I’d fantasized about for too long, and what I knew would finally set me right.

  Cole’s hands started to roam south, sweeping down my body in burning trails of fire until they reached the bottom of my t-shirt. He inched his hands underneath, and I sucked in a gasp when his bare skin touched mine.

  I let my head fall back as he moved his lips from my mouth to my jawline to my neck, sucking and kissing gently. I realized he was doing everything and suddenly felt like I was fifteen again, awkward and clumsy and inexperienced. But I wasn’t inexperienced. Sure, his body might have been missing some familiar parts and included some new exciting ones, but I didn’t have to lay there like I had no clue what I was doing.

  I moved my hands to his lower back, under his t-shirt and slid them up to feel the hard planes of his back and shoulders. Cole pressed his erection harder against me, as if trying to gain some friction, so I decided to help him and snaked one hand back down his back. I cupped his backside, eliciting a groan from him before I moved my hand around to his hip.

  He shifted enough for me to move my hand between us and cup him through his jeans. I massaged him rhythmically, craving my own attention just as his hand started to unbutton my jeans. I sucked in a breath as his hand slid into my boxers. Then suddenly I just wanted to feel him, see him, so I unceremoniously rolled us so I was on top.

  I chanced a glance down at his face to see that he was smirking at me. “I love that you’re taking charge,” he said.

  “For now,” I told him, looking down at him through hooded eyes, knowing I’d leave the heavy-hitting stuff to him like I had before when we’d been together.