“He’s older than me.”
“Doesn’t look it.” She smiled. “Plus, you’re hotter. I’ve got condoms.”
Feeling uncomfortable, he tore off a chunk of the beer label. “I only came here for drugs.”
“I’ll get you some after we’ve finished.”
He shrugged. “I’m not in the mood for sex.”
“You’re not in the mood? That’s a female’s brush off. Don’t ya like me?”
He continued picking at the label. “No, you’re nice,” he said, not knowing what else to say.
“You’re a strange guy. Most blokes I invite into my room are onto me in a second. Are you gay?”
His head shot up. “No!”
She jerked back. “Hey, I didn’t mean it as an insult.”
“Why would ja think that?”
“You not wanting sex.”
“I’ve just broken up with my girlfriend.”
“Okay, chill, dude.”
He grabbed her head with one hand and kissed her lips, then pulled back. “That good enough for you?”
A smile broke out across her face. “Yeah.” She took his beer off him and placed it on the floor, then leaned towards him. He closed his eyes as her lips brushed his. I’m not cheating on Tiana.
Salma stroked his hair, the touch making him more nervous. He opened his eyes, reassuring himself that he wasn’t in a nightmare. A hand landed on his crotch. It would just be sex to prove I’m alright.
Salma pulled back. “Lie down.”
She’s stacked, she’s hot. I can do this. He toed off his boots and did as instructed.
She shimmied out of her skirt and top, leaving on her underwear. “You gonna undress or do ya want me to do it?” She giggled. “Yeah, I’ll do it.” She crawled up over him, making it hard for him to breathe.
She’s a female. She can’t hurt me.
“Help me with your jacket.” She slipped it off, then gripped the bottom of his T-shirt. “Lift your arms.”
I’m bigger than her. Stronger. I can stop this at any time. I’m in control. He lifted his arms.
She pulled his T-shirt up, the top catching over his face. “Maybe I’ll leave you like that.” Giggling, she started undoing his pants.
“What’re ya doin’?” he said, struggling with the shirt.
“Duh! Undressing you.”
“Get it off me!’
“Jeez, calm down.” She removed his top. “Is this your first time?”
“No.”
“Then stop bein’ so uptight and relax.” She climbed off the bed and tugged at his jeans.
He grabbed the waistband. “I’ve changed my mind.”
Her expression soured. “Why?”
“I don’t want it,” he said, doing up his fly. “I only followed you to get away from the crowd.”
She screwed up her face. “You are a fag.”
“No, I’m not!” He pushed off the bed and grabbed his T-shirt, quickly pulling it on.
“Then why ya running away like a scared poof?”
“I’m not gay.”
She sniffed. “Yeah, pull the other tit, but I guess you prefer to pull cock.”
“I do not! I like chicks.” He grabbed his jacket and stuffed his feet into his boots.
“That’s your story.”
“It’s true!”
“Then quit shouting and stay.”
“I said, no.”
“I reckon once you’ve had me you won’t like guys anymore.”
“I’m not gay!”
“Then prove it.” She reached out for him.
He jumped back, his head screaming. He hadn’t been able to say no to Chaz, the drug taking away his choice.
She shoved at his chest. “Bloody pussy tease. Now I know why guys get pissed off at girls for leading them on.”
He stumbled back into the desk. “Don’t touch me!”
“Why fag? You gonna run to your mate with the dreads and tell on me? I bet it’s him you wanna fuck, but he won’t let ya, cos he ain’t a poof.”
“Stoppit!” He went to move around her, but she blocked him. “Lemme go; I just wanna go home. I shouldn’t have come.”
“If you don’t stay, I’m gonna tell everyone at school you’re a faggot.”
“Why are you doin’ this to me?”
“Cos you got me horny, and I don’t like bein’ turned down.” She pushed up against him.
He pushed her away and bolted for the door, almost banging into a tall guy as it opened.
“I heard shouting,” the guy said. “Hey, I know you, you’re that Wera kid.”
Recognising the pale bruiser from the week before, Ash rammed into him, knocking the guy into the staircase banisters. The guy shouted, “Levi!” The chatter downstairs stopped, the only noise in the room playing on the stereo. Ash ran down the stairs, almost falling over the couple still sitting there. People stared at him, a few swearing as he shoved his way outside. He stumbled onto the grass, his untied shoelaces almost tripping him up. Someone grabbed his arm from behind. He yanked it free, screaming, “I said, no!”
“Ash!”
Ash spun around. Tiana’s brother stood in front of him—another person who’d forced him to do something he didn’t want. Ash let loose with a fist. Tiana’s brother blocked it, and punched Ash in the stomach. Gasping for air, Ash staggered backwards, banging into the tall guy from upstairs. The guy shoved Ash towards Tiana’s brother, shouting, “Smash him up, Levi.” People began to form around them, chanting, “Fight.”
Ash turned and shoved him back. The guy raised a fist.
Levi shouted, “No, Brett! Let him go.”
Brett stepped aside, muttering to Ash, “You better run, coward, before I change my mind.”
Ash headed through the gate and weaved around the cars on the footpath.
“Ash, wait up!” Levi called out.
Ash spun around. “What is it about me? Do I have a tattoo across my forehead telling you to fuck me over like everyone else in my life?” His mouth went dry at his poor choice in words.
“You’re the one who’s fucking my sister over.”
Ash opened his arms wide. “Then punch me again, or even better, shoot me. If you’d had the balls and done it last week then my mum would still be alive.”
“There weren’t any bullets in the gun, it’s only for show.” Levi lifted his chin. “And why were you screwing Salma behind Tiana’s back?”
“I didn’t. And why do ya give a shit anyway? You don’t want me with Tiana.” Ash turned away, not caring if he got sucker-punched. Maybe if he was lucky, he’d get knocked out of his misery.
Levi followed. “I don’t want ya cheating on her either.”
Ash continued walking. “We’ve broken up, and I told ja I didn’t sleep with that bitch.”
“Brett said you were in her room.”
Ash stopped and looked up at the night sky, the stars reminding him of the fly spots on his bedroom ceiling. “I only went up there to get away from the noise. Next thing she’s forcing herself onto me, saying that if I don’t do her she’ll tell my mates I’m a fag.”
Levi barked out a laugh. “Forcing herself? What a load of bullshit. You sound like a girl crying rape. Bloody moron, males can’t get raped—”
“Yes, they can! I know.” Ash lifted his hands to his head and gripped onto his hair. Christ, did he just say that? But, it didn’t mean Tiana’s brother would think he’d been raped. He turned and headed past the closed dairy, the night light casting shadows across the signs. He crossed the road without looking, getting more worked up as Levi continued to follow him. Ash spun around. “Either punch me or piss off.”
“I heard you were attacked by your stepdad?” Levi frowned. “Did he rape you?”
“I’m not a fag!”
“I didn’t say you were.”
“Salma said I wuz.”
“Salma’s a bitch, which is why I dropped her. She comes across all nice, then wham, she hits you with her real p
ersonality. So, why’d ja break up with Tiana for?”
“She’s better off without me.”
“I agree, but still, what’s the real reason?”
“What’s with all the bloody questions?”
“I’m tryna figure you out. Didja drop Tiana cos of what your stepdad did?”
Ash started walking again, Levi’s footsteps following him like an echo. “I wuzn’t raped.”
“I didn’t say you were, but with the way you’re acting it sounds like it.”
Ash stopped. “How am I acting?”
“You push Tiana away, then turn down one of the hottest chicks I know. Its sounds like some serious shit went down that night with your stepdad.”
“He murdered my mother!”
“I heard you were attacked too, but I can’t see anything wrong with you other than your agro personality.”
“Just fuck off.” Ash walked past Hunter’s road, heading for the pub. He wanted to find out if his suspicions were right about the bouncer supplying the roofie.
Levi continued to dog him. Quickening his pace, Ash turned onto Claydon Road, heading past the darkened building of The Warehouse. Before he knew it, he was standing in front of the pub. Music rocked from within, the band playing the same Joan Jett song from last Saturday. Ash stared across the car park at the bouncer, a sickening sense of déjà vu now mixing in with anger and fear.
“You should go home,” Levi said.
“My stepdad ruined my home.”
“No one deserves that. Bein’ raped wasn’t your fault.”
“I wuzn’t raped, he attacked me,” Ash hissed.
“Whatever he did, it still wasn’t your fault. And after what went down with my sis, which I should still smack ya over for, I know you’re not a fag.”
“My stepdad’s not one either. Can’t be, he married my mum.” Then why did he do it? Ash walked towards the bouncer. A head taller and with a crooked nose, the guy appeared to be in his mid-thirties—too big for Ash to take on and win. But he didn’t care, because the bouncer couldn’t hurt him more than what Chaz had.
The bouncer turned to look at him, no recognition on his face. “ID.”
“You didn’t need it last week.”
“Don’t know what you’re talking ‘bout, kid, but if you wanna get in I need your ID.”
“What did he pay you?”
“Who?”
“My stepdad, Chaz Greenwood. What did it cost for you to ruin my life?”
The bouncer’s jaw flexed along with his neck muscles.
“Fifty bucks for a roofie?” Ash said.
The bouncer’s gaze shifted about. “I gave him nuthin’. You’re mistaken, you were drunk.”
“Now you remember me! And you’re a liar. I heard what you said to my stepfather.” Ash stepped closer, no longer scared. “You knew what he wuz gonna do, but you still let him leave with me.”
“I swear, I gave him nuthin’.”
“My mother died defending me!”
The bouncer appeared stricken. “I-I didn’t know he was a fag. I wouldn’t have given it to him if I’d known.”
Rage overtook Ash as he swung a fist. The bouncer blocked it and shoved him away. Ash came at him again.
The bouncer grabbed his arm, locking it behind Ash’s back. “Calm down, kid, I didn’t hurt you or your mother, Chaz did.”
Ash stomped onto the bouncer’s foot and elbowed him with his other arm. The man hollered and pushed him away. Ash turned and rammed his head into the bouncer’s chest, knocking the big guy against the wall. The bouncer shoved Ash away again. Ash righted himself, then came at him with another fist. The bouncer ducked and threw an uppercut under Ash’s chin, making him stumble backwards into someone. The person locked his arms behind his back.
“Stoppit, Ash,” Levi said. “You can’t win.”
“Lemme go!”
Levi tightened his grip. “No, you’re gonna get yourself hurt.”
Still dizzy from the blow, Ash spat out blood. “What do you care?”
“Enough. I heard everything. He basically admitted to selling the roofie. I’ll back you up when you go to the cops.”
Feeling defeated, Ash went still. He’d been too upset to think about Levi overhearing the argument. “Lemme go. Please.” I can’t stand people touching me.
“Only if ya promise not to attack him again, the cops can deal with him better.”
The bouncer stalked towards them. “You have no proof.”
Levi let go of Ash and pushed him behind. “Do ya think his stepdad will say the same thing?”
“I did nuthin’. Hurt no one.”
Levi yelled at the bouncer, his words more damaging to the man than any punch. Ash turned away and started heading back to Hunter’s. He was going to tell the cops, stop the bouncer from selling roofies again, but it still didn’t make things right—nothing could do that.
33
Levi
Saturday, September 2.
Yawning, Levi sat down at the table for lunch. After walking Ash home he’d returned late last night, and had ended up sleeping most of the morning away. But even half-awake, he could still sense the sombre mood in the dining-room. Tiana looked like she was ready to burst into tears at any moment, while their mother wasn’t much better, plus his father’s absence was glaringly obvious since Saturday lunch was a family tradition.
Tiana pushed her food around with a fork, stabbing at the cooked banana every so often. Levi was relieved that Ash had split up with her, but also felt bad after talking with the guy. When he got the opportunity, he was definitely going to give Salma a piece of his mind for scaring the kid. And that was exactly what Ash had looked like last night—a terrified kid.
His mother said something he missed. “What?”
“Your father’s coming to pick up some more clothes.”
Levi straightened in his chair. “Why doesn’t he just stay home?”
She exhaled loudly like Levi had said something stupid.
Tiana looked up. “You’re not gettin’ a divorce, are you?”
Their mother shook her head vigorously. “No, it’s just a break.”
“Is this cos of me?”
“Yes.”
Levi banged the table. “Don’t put this on Tiana.”
Their mother’s face hardened. “She put us through hell.”
“She did nuthin’ worse than what I’ve ever done.”
“It’s not the same, you can’t get pregnant.”
“She wouldn’t do that, and she’s not even with the guy anymore.”
Their mother smiled. “Really?”
Tiana turned to look at him. “How do ya know that?”
“I saw him at Salma’s party,” Levi said, flinching at her hurt expression.
“He went to a party last night?” Tiana asked, her voice barely a squeak.
“It’s not what ya think. He’s goin’ through a lot right now, so don’t take it the wrong way.”
“Don’t take it the wrong way?!”
“Hey, calm down—”
“No! The reason he broke up with me was cos he didn’t wanna be round people.”
“He was pro’bly upset.”
“More like he lied to me!” Tiana threw her fork, making Levi duck.
“Tiana!” their mother yelled.
Tiana turned towards her. “What?”
“You could’ve hurt your brother.”
“Oh, so if he gets hurt, you care.”
“What has gotten into you, girl?”
Tiana started crying, her face a mask of misery. “I want Ash back!”
“You’re better off without him.”
“Then Dad’s better off without you!”
“How dare you!” Their mother pushed out of her chair and raised a hand.
Tiana jumped to her feet. “If you touch me I’ll call the police!”
Their mother froze with her hand in mid-air. Levi stared at Tiana in shock too. He’d never seen her stand up to thei
r mother before.
“Lavinia called what you do abuse,” Tiana said.
“I don’t abuse you,” their mother spluttered.
“You slap me whenever I do sumpthin’ you don’t like—”
“That’s called discipline, not abuse. Beating someone is abuse.”
Tiana lifted the side of skirt and pointed to a scar on her hip. “Is that what you call discipline?”
“I-I … that was years ago.”
“You strapped me with the belt buckle.”
“That was one time and the dog was run over because you left the gate open.”
“I didn’t do it on purpose! I was ten.”
“Tiana, I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but I won’t have this behaviour in my house.”
“Then maybe I should go live with Dad.”
“You can’t do that.”
“Why not? He loves me more than you do.”
“Tiana, stop taking this out on me, you’re upset because of this horrible boy, not me.”
“Or more likely I’m sick of people treating me like dirt, especially you!”
“How can you say that? I love you, girl.”
“You don’t act like it. And Ash doesn’t either. He said he loved me then dumped me.”
“He didn’t lie,” Levi said. “He’s just all screwed up, thinks he’ll dirty you.”
Tiana turned towards him, her expression confused. “Dirty me?”
“He said he didn’t want to drop you, but he thinks you’ll find him disgusting.”
“I would never think that. Why would he say that? And why were you even with him? I thought you hated him.”
“I never said I hated him, I just didn’t...” Grimacing, Levi ran a hand over his head. He’d hurt Ash too, it may not have been much, but still, he’d scared the kid for no reason other than he thought he could use him to get some free coke. “I didn’t know him like I do now, and you’ll hafta ask him that other question yourself.”
“No,” their mother said. “Tiana’s not allowed to go anywhere near that boy again. I can’t have my own daughter cavorting with criminals.”
Levi stood up. “He’s not a criminal, he’s the victim.” He flinched at his own words. Not so long ago, he’d described Ash as a drugged out Maori crim. Maybe he was more like his mother than he’d realised.
“Why’re you defending him?” she said. “He disgraced your sister, and regardless of what happened, which he probably deserved—”
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