“And I know exactly what I’d like to do with…” I look up at the waitress who’s looking down at me. “…a coffee black. I’d drink it right down. That’s what I’d do with it. I hear they’re delicious here,” I say.
The waitress’ eyebrow raises letting me know she’s completely suspicious of my sporadic and weird behavior as she reaches for my menu and then quickly turns and walks off.
“You heard the coffee black is good here?” May asks.
“Yeah, you know. Yelp and all. You can really learn a lot about a place just by downloading the right apps these days.” I have no idea what I’m talking about.
May holds her look at me and then out of nowhere the edges of her lips come up into a big smile and she lets out a laugh so big she snorts. “Downloading the right apps?” she asks.
“Yeah, you know. Just download some apps and a world of knowledge is right there in your pocket.”
“Riiiight, Mister Shield.”
“Please, we’re both adults here,” I say trying to make the idea of what I want to do with her seem less weird. “Call me Steven.”
“Wow. Okay. Steven. I like that name. I’ve never called you that.”
“First time for everything,” I say.
“That’s what I was hoping,” she says.
I breathe out through my nose as I try and not so obviously adjust myself in my seat. I swear these pants aren’t made to stretch like this.
CHAPTER 3
May
For the next hour we catch up. I tell him all about college and he tells me some of the crazy cases he’s worked on since he’s last seen me.
I’m having the time of my life and my mind is wrapped up completely in the conversation. I’ve totally forgotten why I even asked to meet up with him.
It’s just that we’re chatting and bantering back-and-forth. There’s never a single awkward pause, lack for words, or anything other than a perfect conversation flowing between two adults.
But when I remember why I asked to meet him I start to feel childish again. I’m not sure if it’s because he’s my godfather or that I’ve just always looked up to him. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but asking what I want to ask him is going to make me feel like less of a person in my own eyes.
I want so badly to feel like I’m on his level, that we’re somehow equal. But one step down the favor road and it will be clear to both of us that we’re not. He’s a step above me. He always has been and maybe he always will be. And that’s probably just another reason why I want him so bad. It’s like he’s almost within my grasp, at least that’s how it feels, but there’s something inside of me that knows he’s way out of my reach. I can only fool myself for a few minutes at a time until reality kicks me in the stomach and reminds me I probably don’t have a chance with him.
And if I don’t get around to asking him the question I came here to ask him I’m not going to have a chance with him or anyone.
“Is everything okay?” he asks. He must be able to see that my mood has changed and suddenly my mind is wandering a bit.
“Yeah, couldn’t be better,” I say not wanting this fun to end.
His gaze narrows. He’s not buying it. “Are you sure?”
“Kind of,” I say.
“If you need someone to talk to you know I’m here for you.”
“I know. Actually…that’s one of the reasons I called you. I mean I definitely wanted to catch up and everything but there’s also something I wanted to ask you. Something that’s kind of embarrassing and everything, but…I just don’t know who else to turn to.”
“May. By all means you know I’m here for you. Whatever it is just tell me and I’ll help you in whatever way I can. And if I can’t I’ll find someone who can.”
“But this is something a little different. There’s some gray area involved.”
“Are you in trouble?”
“Not in the traditional way.”
His head turns to the side and he squints even deeper.
“I’m sorry for beating around the bush. I’m an adult right. I should just come out with it.”
He says nothing.
I inhale a deep breath and then exhale it out hard. “I have a rare form of cancer and I’m not expected to make it past December if I don’t get treatment right away.”
“You…what did you say?” he asks as he shakes his head in disbelief.
“I have a rare form of cancer and I need help right away.”
“Woah,” he says, his eyes opening wide as he leans back in his seat. This time it’s his turn to take in a deep breath and blow it out. Suddenly his body shoots forward to the table and his hands wrap around mine. His gaze hardens as his brow narrows and he looks more through me than at me.
“Listen. We’re going to whip this cancer. We’re going to get you the treatment you need and you’re going to be fine.”
I nod. “Thank you,” I say, but I know he hasn’t even heard the part that’s potentially the worst.
“What can I do to help? You need me to call a doctor? I know a lot, some of the best in the country and they’re right here in L.A.”
“Thank you, but there’s only one doctor who’s able to work on me.”
“Okay then. What’s his name? Let’s get him working on you right away so you can start getting better soon.”
“His name is Doctor Schmidt and he’s back east. New York to be exact.”
“Okay. I probably don’t know him, but let’s get you scheduled for what you need.”
“That’s the hang-up.”
“What do you mean? He’s not willing to help you?”
“His hands are tied.”
“Tied? That’s nonsense. He tells you you’re not going to make it to see the calendar turn but then he won’t help you?”
“He works for a big hospital. They’re the ones in charge.”
“That should make it easier then, right? Your insurance will cover it.”
“If I had insurance.”
“You don’t have insurance?”
“Nope.”
“Nothing from your dad’s plan?”
“I read the fine print. They would cover me until I was twenty-six…if he was still alive. But he’s not so…”
“How much is it going to cost? I’ve got some money saved up.”
I feel his hands tightening over the top of mine. I can feel his passion for helping me and it’s breaking my heart. He’s trying his hardest to solve this problem of mine. I can see him running through scenarios in his head. But this problem is so much bigger than that.
“A lot. As in the doctor is estimating it costing over half a million dollars.”
“Half a… Okay, well can you get insurance now?”
“Pre-existing condition.”
“Oh right. So no insurance now and you can’t really get it?”
“Unfortunately.”
“Will he take less on a cash deal?”
“I thought that too, and he said he would but it wouldn’t be that much of a difference. There are a lot of drugs and machines I’m going to need. They don’t know exactly what’s going on, but they have a pretty good idea. There will be a bit of exploratory research to make sure they can fix the problem and then all the machines and drugs to actually do it.”
“How much less are we talking?”
“He said about fifty thousand, and they’ll still have to get the machines into the hospital. He’s got to do it all there where he has the operating room, the nurses, and everything like that. There’s no real way to do it in a smaller private clinic. They’re just not equipped for something like this.”
I see his mind racing, trying to work through other alternatives. “We’re going to get you all better. I just need a minute to think.”
“I’ve thought through all the scenarios and I spoke with the doctor too. There’s really only one way.”
“Wait! The public hospital isn’t allowed to turn you away, right? It’s the law.”
&n
bsp; “They can’t help me. There are no public hospitals that are equipped. Plus I’m short on time.”
I can see the weight of my words on his shoulders as his body slowly slides down into the chair almost like a snowman melting in the first warm day of spring. It’s like my words have taken all the air out of his balloon. I knew this was going to happen, but I just hoped it wouldn’t.
“Okay. So that won’t work. Every no is just one step closer to a yes.”
“I have the yes already.”
“Great. What is it? What can we do?”
“Mister Shield….I mean Steven.” His eyes are open so wide and I can just see how desperately he wants to help me. I always knew he was the perfect man for me, but now I can see he’s really the perfect man for any girl lucky enough to have him. Just to see how much he cares. How much he wants to help. How hurt he looks knowing something is wrong with me. He really, really cares and that means the world to me. “The doctor recommended something but it’s not exactly the right way to go about things.”
“Sweetheart if there’s a way for you to shine your light on this world for a single day longer than what these doctors think then you can bet your bottom dollar that we’re going to pursue it with everything we’ve got. Just tell me and we’ll make it happen.”
“The doctor told me he’d lose my prior records with the hospital if I can get on someone else’s health insurance. That way there’s no record of a pre-existing condition, but he already knows what he has to do so he can diagnose and address the problem immediately.”
His face goes blank. I don’t say anything for a good ten seconds before he finally says, “So what you’re asking me is…”
“Yeah,” I say. “And I’m really, really sorry. I know how honorable you are and everything but I don’t know any other way.
He just stares at me, his expression not changing. I’m not sure if he’s blown away at the idea that someone thinks he could be corrupted or if he’s thinking of a way to do it. I’m absolutely clueless.
“Can you give me twenty-four hours?” he asks.
“Yes. Of course. Thank you,” I say.
“I’m going to make some calls and find a way we can do this the right way. I need all the information you have right now so I can get to work on this immediately.”
“Thank you,” I say.
The next fifteen minutes are a mad scramble of putting notes on napkins and laying out every bit of information I know. He keeps a positive and upbeat tone on his face and in his tone, but I know deep inside he can’t be so sure.
And I know because I’ve already tried all this myself. I’ve exhausted every possibility and that’s why I came to him.
The only possibility now is what’s going to happen in twenty-four hours when he realizes there really is no other way?
CHAPTER 4
Steven
I made my first call before she was even out of my sight at the coffee shop.
And I haven’t stopped since.
It’s been an absolutely hectic day and it’s not about to end anytime soon. I haven’t eaten a thing and my head is starting to spin. I go to the kitchen to grab an energy drink and look out the window. It’s night already?
I’m running out of time. No…she’s running out of time!
This day has completely chewed me up and spit me out.
I went from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows. When I first saw her I was absolutely captivated. I can’t even deny how my body was reacting and the scenarios my mind was running through. Can I really ask her out on a date? Is that even right?
But then my questions quickly became way more serious. What can we do to keep her alive?
My tongue was tied and my stomach was in knots when I saw her, but it quickly turned to gut-wrenching pain when I realized what today was quickly becoming about. And as hard as I’ve been pounding the phones, researching, and just running through ideas in my mind I’m realizing that she’s right.
There’s only one way.
Dammit!
Why does life have to be like this? Why does it come down to this to keep someone alive? I’m not even thinking about this in political terms in regards to public healthcare or anything like that. I’m just thinking of it on a human level.
But there’s no time to wallow in my sorrow or wonder why things are the way they are. She’s been dealt a terrible hand and I have to do what I can to help her out.
But I’ve lived my entire life as an honest man. My entire being is built around it. My way of life…my profession…the way I view myself.
But I also take a tremendous amount of pride in being her godfather…in honoring my commitment to her father.
I’ve tried everything.
Second mortgage on the house? They won’t do it.
A loan? Not for that amount.
Call in all the money I’ve loaned to friends over the years? What kind of a “friend” would that make me plus it would be nowhere near enough.
Sell my house and move into an apartment with one of the junior cops? We have policies against fraternization.
Get a potluck roommate? Doesn’t matter. I have nowhere near enough equity in the house to make it work.
I run the numbers. I’ve never taken a sick day. Even if I added up all the holidays I’ve worked and didn’t get paid, the sick days I’ve never taken, and the overtime I didn’t bill I’d only be half way there. That’s no excuse anyways, but it does tell me one thing. I’m getting a whole lot closer to doing something I never thought I’d do…question my own integrity.
There’s got to be a way.
I go back into the living room and turn off all the lights. I squeeze my eyes tight trying to lubricate them. They’re bone dry from staring into a computer screen all day trying to work through a solution. I know Einstein used to lay on his back in the dark and stare at the ceiling and often a solution would come to him, or he’d fall asleep.
I know there’s no way I’m going to fall asleep so I figure if it’s good enough for Einstein it’s good enough for me.
Then I remember a piece of advice from an old investigator I met on his way out. He was able to solve crimes with his subconscious with what he called the Dali trick.
At this point I’m up for anything.
I walk back into the kitchen and grab a plate.
A few seconds later I’m back in the living room, but this time sitting in my La-Z-Boy. I pull my keys from my pocket and hold them in my right hand. My forearm is on the armrest of the chair but my hand hangs over. Directly underneath my hand I place the plate…upside down.
The moment I fall asleep the keys will clang onto the plate and supposedly I’ll awaken refreshed and ready to go.
The idea is that I’ll reach that split second moment where I’ll have barely lost consciousness yet also can’t be assured of having really fallen asleep.
Supposedly the “sleep” lasts for less than a quarter of a second and the trick was used by Dali, Einstein, and Aristotle.
There are multiple states of sleep and our bodies behave differently in each part. That crusty old detective told me this was his secret to tapping into a problem solving part of his mind which made him so successful.
I hate the word desperate, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
I close my eyes and start working on a solution to the problem. I’m too awake. Every second I think about how we can make this work I spend another second remembering the curve of her hip, the plumpness of her lips, and how turned on she made me.
This is not working.
I focus more on the task at hand, feeling the stress due to the severity and the time constraint of what we’re facing.
Time passes, but I have no idea how much.
My mind starts to enter a different state, even wandering a bit. I just let it go.
Suddenly I flinch in my chair as my eyes dart around. I look down and see the keys next to the plate on the floor.
What…it worked.
Then it hits me.
My insurance policy is one of the few I’m aware of that actually allows you to add someone who you’re about to marry. Not a wife, but a fiancée…but it can be voided if the wedding doesn’t happen within ninety days after the effective date of the policy modification to add the fiancée.
Cop's Fake Fiancée_An Older Man Younger Woman Romance Page 2
