by K E Osborn
I hear her start to cry and I close my eyes hoping like hell he isn’t holding her.
“I’m sorry! I’m happy that you’ve found someone. Does she make you happy?” she asks and I listen intently.
“Yes, very. It’s only new, but I love her, Cass,” he says and I half-smile.
“And does she love you?” she asks.
I tense up waiting to hear his answer.
“I think so,” he says making me bite my bottom lip.
“You think so? She hasn’t told you?” she asks and I instantly want to go back and bitch slap her.
“Look Cass, you’re not here to talk about my love life. I hate to be rude, but what do you want?”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean—”
“Its fine,” he says and there’s an awkward silence for a moment. “Cass, why are you here?”
I hear someone exhale loudly and then footsteps. I assume they’re walking to the sofa.
“I need your help,” she says and I look toward the lounge room and listen closely.
“With what?”
She starts to cry again and I tense up knowing he’s probably comforting her. It makes my blood boil to know he’s touching her.
“There’s this guy. I went on a couple of dates with him and now he’s hassling me because I won’t go back out with him. He keeps sending me letters and I found Mittens dead in the backyard, with a note saying I was next. I’m scared. H,” she says and I tense up slightly.
What’s he meant to do about it?
“Has he hurt you at all? Touched you I mean?” Hudson asks, his voice sounding strained.
“No, not yet, but I know it’s heading that way. I didn’t know what to do. Can you help me?” she asks and I scoff.
What? Do you want him to confront the guy? I don’t think so!
“Look, he sounds like an arsehole and a dangerous one if he’s killed your cat. I don’t like the idea of you being out there and alone so let me make a few calls to the boys and I’ll get them to deal with him. Don’t worry. Just give me all his details and I’ll have him sorted out in no time. He won’t bother you again once my guys are finished with him. I promise,” he says making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. If Hudson is involved in a biker gang then he could be talking about killing this guy.
“Hudson, I don’t want you near him, okay? Let the boys handle it, please?” she begs and my skin crawls at the thought of her making puppy dog eyes at him. I feel sick. My stomach is churning and I don’t know if I’m angry or completely jealous, or maybe both. I just want Cassie gone!
“I promise, I’ll let the boys have this one. Are you okay though? I don’t want you out there on your own. I’d say stay here, but I think that would be inappropriate. I think you should stay in a motel or something like that tonight. Just don’t go home, okay?” Hudson asks and my stomach lurches at the thought of her staying here. Even though I know she isn’t going to, the thought makes me angry. I don’t even know her and I hate her. I’ve never felt so possessive in my life! All I know is that Hudson is mine and she will not take him from me!
“Thanks, H, I wish I could stay here with you, I always feel safe with you around,” she says and I stand up feeling enraged that she’s still here. I lean up against the wall as my breathing is rushed and harsh.
“Thanks, but I think you should go. Text me his details and I’ll make the call,” he says and then there’s an awkward silence again.
“Hudson, if you don’t know if she loves you, just remember I always will,” I hear her say and my eyes widen and my mouth drops open.
No fucking way!
I can’t hear anything as the ringing in my ears is too loud. I storm toward the lounge room and walk in to see them hugging. I purse my lips together while I breathe harshly out of my nose. I’m furious and if she doesn’t get off him soon, I will pull her off myself. I cough to clear my throat and Hudson looks back at me and lets the whore go. She looks at me and half-smiles. I grunt and lunge forward just as Hudson grabs me around the waist and pulls me back.
“Vee, stop,” he says while I glare at her. She is smirking at me and he pulls my head around to face him. “Vee look at me,” he says calmly and I slowly look at him.
“She’s just leaving, aren’t you, Cass?” he asks and she shrugs and tilts her head.
“I thought I’d stay for a while, catch up on all the time we spent together,” she says and I grunt and lunge forward again, but Hudson holds me back.
“Cassie, stop it,” he says as I send death glares at her.
“Vee baby, stop,” he says making me look at him again. My chest is heaving so violently I feel a little dizzy.
“You can’t even tell him you love him and you’re acting like this? You found a crazy one, H,” she says and I shake my head and break free from his grip and walk across to her. She tenses and suddenly all her bravado has vanished. I get right in her face and stare her down.
“Don’t you dare judge me. You couldn’t keep him happy. At least I can, bitch,” I say and she frowns pushing me.
“Cass, stop it,” Hudson says, but it’s too late I’m way too worked up now. I rush forward and slap her hard across her face and then continue to slap at her as she puts her hands up trying to defend herself.
“Vee!” Hudson is behind me in an instant and pulling me away from her.
“You ever come near my man again and I will kill you myself. You won’t need your stalker to do it,” I yell and Hudson huffs as he pulls me away from her.
“You’re a crazy bitch!” she yells out. Hudson pulls me into the hallway as I try to get loose.
“Vee, stop fighting me,” he says while he pushes me against the wall and holds me there with his body. I breathe harshly out of my nose as the water wells in my eyes again, but it doesn’t flow over. I know it won’t. “Baby, stop, you’re acting crazy,” he says as I stop struggling and look at him. My chest is heaving and I feel helpless. I bang my head back against the wall and he shakes his head as my body goes limp.
“She can’t have you,” I whisper as my bottom lip quivers.
He shakes his head. “She isn’t going to. Now stop acting like a kid and stay here. I mean it Vee, if you come back out into the lounge room, I’m going to be really angry. Just stay here and I’ll let her out and then we can talk. Just stay the fuck here,” he says as he slowly eases his body away from mine. He looks at me gauging my movements.
I nod and he leans in kissing me quickly, and then walks back out to the lounge room.
“Look you have to go. Just go to a hotel or anywhere just not back home and call me tomorrow. I’ll get the boys onto it, okay?” he asks and I hear their footsteps getting closer, he must be walking her to the door.
“H, seriously, she’s crazy, just think about what I said. I miss you,” she says and everything in me is telling me to stay here, but I can’t. I run toward the front door and Hudson sees me before I can reach her.
“Fuck off out of here you whore. You can’t have him,” I yell as he grabs me and holds me back.
“What the fuck did I say, Violet?” he yells and then he turns back to Cassie as I struggle in his arms to get to her.
“Cassie leave, don’t come back here again. If you need to talk, phone me. Just leave before Vee kicks your arse,” he says and she smirks looking at me which only makes me furious.
“Fuck you, you little bitch. Don’t look at me like that, I’m gonna fucking—”
“Vee, stop it. Cassie get out of here,” he yells and she smirks again and blows Hudson a kiss. I scream and fight harder to get to her as she walks out the door and shuts it behind her. Hudson grabs me and pushes me away from him. I run toward the door and he grabs me again.
“Violet, calm the fuck down,” he yells and I turn to face him.
“Calm the fuck down? You calm the fuck down! Hudson, she was all over you and you let her. She tells you she loves you still and you say nothing. How am I supposed to react?” I yell in his face.
&
nbsp; “Not like a fucking spoilt teenager. There’s no need for violence, Vee,” he says and I scoff.
“No need for violence, yeah right, and just how are your biker mates going to ‘sort him out’ huh? You’re telling me that’s not going to end up with some severed head in an alleyway?” I scream at him.
He screws his face up and shakes his head. “What the fuck are you on woman?”
I screw my face up. “Don’t talk to me like that, Hudson? I’m not a junkie and you know it! What the fuck are your mates going to do to that guy, huh?”
“Violet, you’ve no idea what you’re even on about,” he says, running his hand through his hair and turning away from me.
“Don’t I? Really? You think I don’t know about you and your work? I’m not as dumb as you think I am, Hudson. I found the bikers vest in your robe. I know you’re a member of the Rebel Dogs. I know you probably—”
“You were snooping through my things, again?” he yells right in my face.
“Yes!” I yell back.
He shakes his head. “I swear I have no idea who you are right now,” he says calmly.
“Well, I don’t know you either, Hudson. Tell me… just admit you’re a biker,” I say and he shakes his head.
“Tell me what you do and I’ll tell you what I do. It’s only fair. These were your rules remember, baby?” he says sarcastically.
I scowl at him as my heart races a million miles a second. “How dare you!” I yell and go to storm off.
“How dare me? How dare you, Vee? She’s a friend. One I’ve had for a very long time and you treated her like shit. There was no need for that,” he yells and I turn back to face him and I glare and point my finger at him.
“You still love her don’t you?”
He rolls his head backward and exhales loudly. “No,” he says adamantly.
“Bullshit, if you want her then go for it, I won’t stand in your way. I saw the way you were looking at her—”
“Now you’re just making shit up!”
“Excuse me?”
“I wasn’t looking at her in any way, Vee. You’re making this way bigger than it is. I love you… you fucking idiot,” he says throwing his hands in the air.
“Fuck you!”
“Why are you acting like this? Are you that jealous? There’s no need to be, Violet. I only want you, but not if you’re going to act like a spoilt brat and beat up my friends,” he says.
I scoff and walk to him and push him hard.
“Hey!” he yells as he steps backward and I go to walk off. He grabs my arm and pulls me back to him so my gut instinct kicks in and I turn and slap him across the face. Hard.
“Fuck Vee,” he says letting go of me and my eyes start to water so I turn around and walk toward the bedroom.
“Vee… Violet, talk to me,” he yells out as I storm into the bedroom. I climb into bed and pull the covers up to my neck and roll on my side facing the window.
My whole body is shaking and I feel like if there’s a time for me to cry, now would be it. But nothing happens. I stare at the wall and try to calm my breathing. I don’t know why I’m so angry. I don’t know why I acted like that?
I love Hudson and she has no right to tell him I don’t. I know I can’t say it yet, but that doesn’t make it so she can tell him how flawed I am. Stupid bitch! I hope the stalker gets to her before Hudson’s guys get to him.
What the hell am I thinking?
I never want anyone to die, not even Cassie, especially if she means so much to Hudson. I don’t want him to go through the pain of losing someone especially when I know what that’s like. My body is still trembling as I lay in his bed and wait for him to come in the room. It feels like hours have passed and I can hear him on the phone, but I can’t hear what he’s saying. Probably apologising to Cassie for me being such a ridiculously jealous girlfriend if that’s what I am. We haven’t even made our relationship official and I’m acting like this?
What the fuck is wrong with me?
I’m lost in my thoughts of how utterly ridiculous I was being when I hear Hudson walk into the bedroom. I swallow hard but keep facing the wall. I’m embarrassed and I can’t face him. I just hope he can forgive me for acting like an idiot. I feel the bed dip beside me and I inhale sharply as his smell invades my senses. Everything in me is telling me to turn around and face him, to talk this through with him. But I’m beyond mortified that I’ve behaved that way and I know he’s probably still angry with me, so I decide that if he wants to talk he will let me know. He pulls the covers up over him and I wait for his arm to come across my stomach and for him to hold me, but instead I feel him shift away and over to his edge of the bed. My heart is racing in my chest and I can’t help it as I turn my head to look at him. He has his back to me and is as far away from me as possible. My bottom lip quivers and I turn back around pulling the covers up even higher. It’s not cold, it’s actually quite a hot night, but right now I feel like I am frozen to the core. I hate that I’ve made him not want to be near me. I hate that I acted that way, and I hate that I’m not able to tell him I love him.
Right now I’ve never hated myself more in my life, and for the first time it feels like I actually deserve to be alone.
I’ve spent most of the night lying awake. Hudson finally drifted off to sleep about an hour ago, I can tell by the way he’s breathing a little heavier. I feel like shit and I’m not looking forward to tomorrow, when I’m absolutely sure that he’s going to break this off. I don’t blame him, I was beyond unreasonable. I just can’t help but think this is my last night with Hudson and we’re spending it as far away from each other as possible. I sigh and think I may as well go to the bathroom. My bladder is calling me and I’m awake anyway so I may as well do something to occupy a section of my sleepless night. I slowly get up so I don’t wake Hudson and then walk into the en-suite. I don’t bother to turn on the light as it will be too bright for my eyes and I don’t need it anyway.
I use the loo and just end up sitting on the toilet doing nothing, just thinking about how I fucked up.
“Vee?” I hear Hudson call out.
I quickly stand from the toilet and turn to flush it.
“Violet?” he calls out sounding terrified.
I flush the toilet and wash my hands when he comes running into the en-suite.
“Oh, thank fuck,” he says and then pulls me into a giant hug just as I turn off the taps. “I panicked and thought you’d left me during the night,” he says pulling me back to look at me.
My bottom lip quivers and he pulls me tight to his chest. I wrap my wet hands around his waist and it’s so good to be touching him, finally.
“I didn’t leave, I wouldn’t do that to you,” I say and he pulls back and his lips crash to mine forcefully. I lean into his kiss and open my mouth so we can kiss passionately. He backs me up against the basin and pushes his entire body against mine.
“I’m so sorry,” I murmur through the kiss.
He keeps kissing me and shakes his head slightly and then pulls away breathlessly. “I had no idea she would turn up like that and you had every right to feel threatened. I knew she still loved me and yet I still let her in and spoke to her without you in the room. That was a mistake and unfair to you. So, I’m sorry,” he says and I lean my forehead against his.
“I acted so badly. I wish I could control my jealousy. I’ve never felt like that before, Hudson. It scared me. I’m sorry I yelled at you too because I didn’t mean any of it.”
“I know, don’t worry. If any of the men in your life came back and acted the way Cassie did I would’ve wanted to knock them out too,” he says making me chuckle, but wince at the same time at the thought of Danny.
Hudson meeting Danny, no chance of that happening…
“I love you, Vee, just remember that, okay?” he asks and I look down at the ground. He places his finger under my chin and slowly pulls me back up to look at him.
“I’m sorry I can’t say it back, but I’m work
ing on it. Trust me on that? And I swear I’m going to tell you everything soon. I’m just not quite strong enough yet. But I promise I will, Hudson, you mean too much to me to let us not work because of my insecurities,” I say and he smiles and nods against my forehead.
“I don’t care if you never say it, Vee. I know you feel it. I have no idea why you can’t say it, but I know you will tell me one day. You’ll tell me all about your past and I will be there to support and comfort you when you do tell me. I know whatever it is, it’s painful for you, so I know how hard it must be, but baby, I’m here for you, and I’m ready whenever you want to tell me.”
I nod and sniff and lean in to kiss him gently. His hand skims down my negligee and down to my thigh. He lifts my leg up to wrap around him as he moves in closer. His hands move down to my arse and he lifts me up so I’m sitting on the edge of the basin. I giggle slightly and he grinds his rock hard cock into my panties. I moan into his mouth and run my hands through his hair. I love making up with him after a fight. Admittedly we’ve only had two fights, and this is one of them, but making up is always fun. His hands slide up my thighs and he pulls me closer to his hips so we’re touching in every way possible. His tongue collides with mine as he kisses me sensually, running his hands up and down my thighs. I move my hands down his back and around the front of his boxers and pull them down past his firm arse and then they fall to the ground. He kicks them to the side and his hands grab the hem of my negligee and he lifts it up over my head forcing us part lips for the briefest of seconds before they come crashing back to mine. He pulls me against him, so my chest is against his and his cock is grinding against my panties.
He thrusts forward and I moan at the contact of his cock with my soaking wet pussy, his hands come down and he grabs the hem of my panties and tears them away. Oh God, that’s so hot!
He kisses me again and then his hands move up to my breasts. He massages them both and tweaks at my nipples making them harder than they already are. His tongue is caressing mine strongly and I want him so bad that I move my hand down to his cock and slowly start to pull on it. He moans into my mouth and his hand runs from my breast down in between my legs. I open them wider for him to gain access and he slips two fingers inside me slowly and moves his thumb to my clit. I groan into his mouth and we start to work each other up. I pull slowly on his cock, rubbing my thumb over the tip and feeling the bead of moisture on it. He starts to move his fingers inside of me while pressing his thumb onto my clit. Being intimate with him makes me feel closer when we make love, or fuck as I think we’ll be doing in a minute. I start to move my hips in time with the thrusts of his fingers inside me just as his hips move in time with me pulling on his cock. I move my hand up and down with a slight rotation on the way up and I know he likes it because on each pull upwards he whimpers into my mouth. He moves his fingers in deeper and then he moves his fingers so he’s massaging my front wall. I gasp and my head falls back breaking our kiss as I moan loudly.
