A Brand New Ending

by Stephanie Rolls

  “At your service.” He smiles, tipping his hat.

  We both fall silent for a second.

  “Since when did you become a cop?” I blurt out.

  He laughs lightly.

  “That’s a long story. Maybe if you let me in I can tell you.”

  A flash of panic goes through me; the idea of me alone with a strange man terrifies me. Tate would never hurt anyone… let alone me. Listening to my gut I push the door open, allowing him to enter.

  “Thanks,” he says, taking off his hat. “It’s pretty cold out there.”

  He looks around the living room, realizing it’s completely dark. I begin to get nervous. Was he here to arrest me? Kick me out? His eyes find mine again and I swear that he can hear my heart beating in my chest.

  “We really missed you around here,” he says, his face serious.

  Tate was my best friend Hannah’s big brother. He was only a few years older than us. We spent a lot of time at each other’s house and Tate was always nice to us. He wasn’t the typical older brother that ignores his younger sister. His whole family was my second family. Another thing I lost when Elaina took me.

  I push back the tears trying to fall. He walks over to the kitchen as flicks on the light, the room illuminating. I stare at it like I’ve never seen electricity before. He notices.

  “Did you not try to turn on the lights?” he asks.

  I shake my head.

  “I figured it would have been shut off. It’s been…years,” I utter. I turn to face him, my mind curious. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Of course.” He smiles.

  “Why is it still here?”

  His eyebrows furrow.

  “What do you mean?”

  I swallow before speaking again. “My father died, I…left.” More like taken.

  He shrugs. “I don’t know,” he admits. “There was some complication about the land after your father’s death, plus I don’t think anyone in this town would let them touch it. Your father was very important to this town.”

  My vision becomes blurred and silent tears start to fall down my cheeks. He takes a step forward and his fingers find my cheek, wiping them away.

  “What happened to you, Phoenix?” he asks.

  I laugh a little. “That’s a long story.”

  “I’ve got nothing but time,” he responds. “It’s not like much happens in this town, you’re the first call I’ve had all night.”

  Chapter 65

  Braeden

  The ride back to the house seems like an eternity, my legs bouncing from the anxiety. When we reach the driveway I push the door open before the car comes to a complete stop, my footing faltering a little. Throwing the front door open I bound inside and start screaming her name but there is nothing but silence. I hear the footsteps of my father and Chelsea coming from behind me. I remain frozen, completely lost.

  “What am I suppose to do now?” I say softly.

  I feel a hand being placed on shoulder.

  “Chelsea, if you could please give us a moment,” I hear him say.

  My father pushes us into his office and I don’t protest. I have no energy to.

  “Sit,” he demands.

  Finding a chair I place myself inside it and remain silent. My father sits in the chair next to mine.

  “Are you OK?” he asks.

  I almost laugh at the question.

  “I’m peachy,” I snap.

  “I know that I can be hard on you sometimes and I know that you need a father right now and not a medical professional.”

  I look up at him, his expression…concerned.

  “I appreciate that.”

  We both fall silent again.

  “How could she just…leave?” I blurt out.

  I hear him sigh slightly. “I know that you don’t understand it now, but this might be what’s best for her.”

  I am aghast by his statement.

  “Are you fucking kidding me?”

  “Braeden, listen to me,” he says, his voice more stern. “People like Phoenix are…different.”

  I try to calm my nerves but it’s not working. He begins to notice.

  “Do you love her?” he changes the subject.

  I feel like our lives have been shifted back, a sense of déjà vu flowing though me.

  “More than I could ever explain,” I answer.

  “Would you do anything for her? If she had a certain wish, would you grant it to her?”

  “Absolutely,” I respond,

  “It seems confusing, but Phoenix choosing to leave was what she wanted. I know that you are scared right now, but you have to respect her wish.”

  “How will I know that she is safe?”

  “Phoenix is a smart girl, Braeden. Even with her recent past of abuse, she thrives in life incredibly well.”

  I cringe at the word abuse.

  “What if she tries…?” I can’t even finish the sentence.

  My father’s eyes close and we both fall silent. When he opens them again, tears flow down his cheeks.

  “I just don’t want you to make the same mistakes I did,” he says. And in that moment I know were not just talking about Phoenix. I don’t know what to say, so I let him continue.

  “I thought I was helping your mom, but I ended up just pushing her further towards the cliff.”

  “You were just trying to help her.”

  He shakes her head. “No, I refused to listen to her wishes.”

  “You did it because you love her; you wanted what’s best for her.”

  “Sometimes what you think is best for them really isn’t. I forced her into things she didn’t want to do. I had already lost Thomas, and I couldn’t bear losing her too. But in the end that’s exactly what happened.”

  I still remain silent. “Do you remember what I told you when you first came to me about her?”

  I nod.

  “Some people don’t want to be saved,” I say just above a whisper.

  “I’m not saying that you should never see her again, but I beg of you, please, give her space. If she chooses to come back then do not give her any grief for leaving. She is confused more than you could ever imagine.”

  I look at my father and I really notice his face. I begin to finally understand what he’s gone through, the hardships he’s had to deal with. The ones I was too young to understand. He goes to get up but I reach out, grabbing his arm.

  “Thanks,” I say.

  “I’m glad that we had this talk, Braeden,” he responds. “It was long overdue.”

  Once my father leaves the room I remain seated in my chair. When I am able to tell my legs to move I find myself immediately heading upstairs, even though I know that it will just cause me pain. Pushing open her bedroom door I scan the room, the light that once filled this room now gone. I close my eyes and inhale, a faint smell of her fills my nostrils.

  Running my fingers along her dresser, I pick up various things of hers, the lump in my throat and the burn behind my eyes becomes stronger. I look out the bedroom window and it almost seems unreal that so little time has passed. My body feels like it has been awake for days on end, every second ticking away painfully slow. My father’s conversation replays in my head and I don’t know whether to scream or curl into a corner and never come out.

  But I am numb. I don’t feel hatred. I don’t feel sadness. OK, maybe that’s a lie. My mind keeps going back to what she’s doing at this moment. Was she safe?

  Lying down on the bed I curl up into myself, my face in her pillow, her scent now all around me and I become crippled. My body no longer is made of bone and muscle, but of mush. At this moment, I don’t know if I can move, fearing that if I try I may fall to the floor. So I stay.

  I don’t know how long it was before I fell asleep but I’m startled awake by a shaking of my shoulder. I fly up out of the bed.

  “Phoenix?” I shout out into the room.

  My eyes peer into the darkness of the room but there is no sound. No
stirring. No one’s here. Laying back down I run my hands through my hair, gathering my thoughts together. It wasn’t a dream.

  Pushing my feet over the side of the bed, I pull my heavy form out of the bedroom and slowly walk downstairs. As I reach the kitchen I glance up at the wall. 3:18 a.m. I groan as I pull open the fridge, the light inside blinding me. Grabbing the carton of orange juice I flip open the tab. The cool liquid runs down my throat quenching the thirst I didn’t know I had. With the carton still in my hand I leave the kitchen and head to the family room. Setting the carton down on the coffee table I go to sit on the couch but instead I am met with a scream. I abruptly stand back up, my eyes shifting to see a massive figure sprawled across the couch.

  “Jesus, man, I think you sat on my balls,” the figure shouts, his voice strained.

  I reach over and flip on the lamp, Donovan’s form wrapped in a blanket.

  “What the fuck are you doing here? I ask.

  He sits upright, the blanket now wrapped around his shoulders. He starts rubbing his eyes. I’ve clearly woke him up from his beauty sleep.

  “Your father called me, wanted me to hold down the fort,” he explains.

  I huff. “I’m not a child, I don’t need any damn babysitting.”

  “Says the person that is whining like one,” he snaps back.

  Donovan grabs the orange juice from the table and tips it back until it runs dry.

  “Thanks for the drink,” He smiles.

  I shake my head, smirking a little.

  “Ahh, I knew that there was a smile in there somewhere,” he teases.

  I immediately drop it and the room falls silent.

  “So, what are you going to do man?” he asks.

  I remain silent.

  “I mean, what the hell even happened?” he asks.

  I sit down on the now vacant end of the couch and immediately put my head into my hands.

  “I should have known,” I blurt out. I begin to shake my head. “I should have got rid of his fucking ass a long time ago. No one liked him, not even me.”

  Donovan remains silent. Pulling my head up I lean back against the couch, staring

  up at the ceiling, my fingers running through my hair.

  “Fuck, this is all my fault.”

  “That’s not true, Phoenix, would be dead if you two weren’t so…fucking destined for each other.”

  I shift my eyes to the side, now facing Donovan.

  “If we’re so fucking destined, then why the hell am I sitting here not knowing where she is?” I retort.

  He doesn’t respond.

  “Exactly,” I say, the anger building inside me.

  “Then why don’t you go find her?” he asks.

  I laugh inside. “She clearly doesn’t want me around.”

  “That’s bullshit and you know it,” Donovan says.

  “What the fuck am I suppose to do? She left Donovan, no goodbye, no note…if she wanted to be found she would have told me where she is going. I’m not fucking psychic…”

  And then something clicks. I jump off the couch and grab one of my father’s jackets off the coat rack.

  “You fucking coming or what?” I blurt out to Donovan.

  Donovan throws the blanket off of him, his form by my side in a few steps.

  Chapter 66

  Phoenix

  My conversation with Tate spilled out of me at a rapid rate, my mind and mouth going a million miles an hour. When I had finished I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. But every time his name came up it felt as though there were tiny needles being inserted into my heart. I finally look up from the ground and Tate’s eyes are wide. The burn in my cheeks grows.

  “I…How…” is all that he could mutter.

  I just shrug.

  “These assholes are in jail right?” he asks, his fingers curled into a fist.

  “I only know about Carl, the other one I’m not so sure, I left shortly after the incident.”

  “You have to go back,” he says standing up. “They’ll need you to testify.”

  I stand up abruptly, fear coursing through me.

  “I’m not going back,” I spit. “I have nothing left there. I have nothing anywhere. I am alone and that’s the way it should be. No more of people getting hurt because of me. I’m not worth it.”

  “I think that’s for the other person to decide,” he says softly. “Plus, anyone would be crazy not to want to be around you, Phoenix.”

  A voice emits from his radio.

  “Negative. No disturbance, coast is clear,” he says into it. He looks back at me. “I have to go, people are going to start wondering where I am. Are you going to be OK?”

  I give him a small smile. “Yeah. I’ll be fine.”

  He nods. “Maybe you can come over sometime, I’m sure my parents would love to see you.”

  “I’d like that,” I respond.

  He reaches over and puts his arms around me. I don’t flinch.

  “It’s really good to see you,” he says softly.

  I shut the door behind him, locking the handle and the deadbolt, something I never felt was necessary before. With the crackle of the fire now filling the room, I lay back down on the couch, my encounter with Tate running through my mind. And then I think about him. Curling up into myself, I stare at the dancing flames of the fire, wondering what he was doing right now. Was he mad at me? Was he looking for me? Was he forgetting about me? I continue to lay there and watch as the sun begins to rise, this time sleep not reaching me.

  ~

  Getting up, I pull the blanket off the couch and wrap it around me. I exit through the back door and the fresh smell of rain reaches my nose, the weather matching my disposition. I sit down in one of the rockers and just stare out into the forest. My body is shaking from the cold but it somehow numbs the pain, making my body calm and my mind blank. A temporary coma. I don’t know how long I am out there before movement catches my eye. I look at the figure and quickly look away, my eyes probably playing tricks on me.

  “Phoenix?” a delicate voice says.

  I look back again, the figure closer.

  “Rain?” I say in a hushed tone.

  She smiles back at me. Pulling myself from the chair I bound over to her, wrapping my arms around her, her warm body touching my cold skin. I pull back and really look at her. It seems as though I haven’t seen her in years with all that has happened.

  “What are you doing here?” I ask, still shocked that she is here. “Wait…did you have a vision?”

  She laughs.

  “No,” she starts. “Although when I saw Dr. Harris come in I knew something was wrong.” I am somehow disappointed. I snap my eyes back at her.

  “Dr. Harris?”

  She shifts her eyes around.

  “Guess I’m not good at keeping secrets am I?” she smiles.

  “He…sent you here?” I ask. “How did you know where to go?”

  “It doesn’t take a smart person to figure out where you would go, Phoenix. You only really spoke of this as your true home. Plus, someone noticed your picture at the bus station.”

  My knees become weak at the thought of the Harris’ searching for me. I never wanted to cause anyone any grief. But I guess I was too naive. I sit back down in the chair and Rain sits in the one beside me, my eyes resuming their position into the forest.

  “So, what, are you here to bring me back?” I ask harshly.

  I feel Rain’s hand slip into mine.

  “I would never force you to leave. I am here for nothing but companionship.”

  I look back over to her. “I am so happy that you are here, but I don’t think I will be great company. Wait….how are you even here? Aren’t the people at the hospital going to be looking for you?”

  She smiles again.

  “I leave the hospital escaping to you,” she starts. “I left by choice, Phoenix. Remember?”

  I think back to what seems like so long ago, Rain’s story about how she came to
be in that hospital. She was there by choice, not force. We fall silent again until the grumble of my stomach fills the air.

  “Let’s go get you some food,” she says while tugging my hand.

  “I’m not hungry,” I say softly.

  “Well, I’m starving.” She smiles.

  We walk back into the house and Rain holds a bag out to me.

  “I know that you couldn’t care less right now, but you look like hell.”

  I scowl at her. “Well, then my outside matches my inside,” I announce.

  She lets out a sigh.

  “Just go take a shower, for me?” she asks sweetly.

  I grumble and take the bag from her, making my way upstairs.

  “I’ll be down here whenever you are ready,” I hear her voice call out.

  When I reach the confines of the bathroom I start to undress when something gets caught on the inside of my sweatshirt. Looking down into it I see that attached to the inside of the sleeve is my bracelet. I had forgotten I was even wearing it. With shaky hands I reach down, unclasping it and set it on the counter top. The silver wings bounce in the light. I place it in the medicine cabinet. Out of sight, out of mind.

  When I pull myself from the shower I wrap myself in the towel that Rain brought, tucking it underneath my armpit. Opening up the bag some more, I dump the contents of it out onto the counter, grabbing the brush and run it though my tangled hair.

  “Ouch,” I call out.

  When I’m done with it I set it back down when something shiny catches my eye. In a cup near the faucet is my father’s razor. I stare at it for a second before taking it between my fingers. My father was always into the old school way of shaving. With my opposite hand I open the straight razor. I look up at myself in the mirror and press the cool metal against my skin. My breathing becomes hitched and I feel like I have been transported back in time. Closing my eyes I concentrate on my breathing, my hands frozen. Braeden would want you to live.

  The next thing I hear is metal hitting porcelain. Looking down the razor is no longer in my hand, but now at the bottom of the sink. A sense of panic washes over me and I hastily pull on the clothes that were in the bag, slamming the door to the bathroom shut behind me. I fly down the stairs to see Rain trying to tidy up.