Tainted Rose

by Yumoyori Wilson

  I fought to open my heavy eyelids, my body felt weak and stiff. I squinted, the bright light harsh against my eyes. Yet, I could feel the joy overflow inside me as I enjoyed the light’s appearance in my life. It was so beautiful, appreciating its essence after the endless amount of darkness that plagued me.

  I turned my head to the side; my eyes settled on the sleeping shifter next to me. Ryder’s body felt warm and inviting; his breathing was slow as I watched his chest rise and fall.

  I turned my body slightly to face his, pressing myself against him; his warmth soothed me. I craved for such warmth for so long, I didn’t know how I should feel, now that I finally acquired it. He stirred slightly; his hand landed softly on my waist, pulling me closer.

  “Mako,” he mumbled, his breathing returned to normal as he fell back asleep.

  I smiled against his body as I enjoyed his presence. I wasn’t lonely anymore; I finally had someone who loved me. I wasn’t alone anymore; the light had given me salvation.

  I didn’t fight when the darkness attempted to claim me this time. I wasn’t afraid of not waking up. I had won that battle already. I just needed to rest; my body still exhausted.

  “Makoto? Sweetheart, can you hear me?” Ryder called out.

  I swear my eyes were only closed for a few seconds. I opened them; Ryder stared down at me, relief swarmed across his face as he blinked a few times; his eyes became glossy. I didn’t think I could handle seeing Ryder cry.

  My mind still recovered from whatever I’d just experienced. I didn’t think I could comfort him as I should. I wanted to say something funny, anything to lighten the mood, but my mind was blank. I stretched my arms out as my eyes began to blur.

  “Hug?” I whispered; my voice emitted only a glimpse of the amount of desperation I had experienced as I held back a sob. I wasn’t ready to return to my clumsy, dramatic self. I just needed to feel loved.

  His body crashed into mine; his arms wrapped around me, squeezing me against his body. I needed to feel him; I craved his warmth and melted into his embrace. I allowed the tears that pooled in my eyes, to fall, exhausted from fighting my internal battle.

  I had accepted the fact I was going to die, never able to see Ryder and the others again. Now that I was alive, being held in the arms of a man I cared dearly about, I wished I had fought even harder. I made him, and the others worry; and it pained my heart.

  “Everything’s okay Mako. Don’t cry,” he consoled me, cradling me in his arms. We laid there for a long time; my cries dimmed down to small whimpers. Once I was ready to speak, I told him about my experience with the darkness.

  “It was as if I didn’t exist. I was a part of some void where I had no body or voice. I tried so hard, but it kept consuming me, as if to swallow me over and over again. I – I felt so alone Ryder. It wasn’t like when I was at the facility and didn’t have any friends. I was truly alone, and I had no idea who I was. Not being able to identify myself, with no one to talk to, as I faded in and out. My spirits were gone; I couldn’t even sense Midnight. It was just me floating in the land of darkness, and it was cold. I could hear you guys. I heard Daniel, Marcus and Elias talking to me, but I didn’t know it was them at the time. Your voice and I think Stryker? I knew it was your voice, but I couldn’t remember who you were. I heard Eli’s singing…it was a song my mom would sing to me,” I confessed.

  Ryder remained silent for a moment; the arm that cradled my head turned my body to face him as he continued to aimlessly play with my hair. He listened intently to my confession, allowing me to take my time as I paused to calm myself, while I relived the experience out loud. He comforted me, pressing himself against me and encouraging me softly. He had to remind me that I was alive and not dreaming.

  “You remember Catherine. Do you remember everything?” he asked me, his left hand left its hold on my waist as he wiped the tear that rolled down my cheek. I smiled softly at his affection.

  “Not everything. Just her singing when we were walking in the garden. She told me that the light would always guide me home; its guidance would lead me to salvation. When I heard Eli’s singing, I finally remembered. That’s when I started to peel the sludge away, finally able to free myself and run towards the light,” I explained.

  He nodded.

  We took another moment to relax in each other’s embrace. I never thought I’d miss him so much. Now that he was here, I was so happy to be with him. I began to worry about the others, especially Elias. Ryder must have noticed me biting my lip, a usual sign of uneasiness; his thumb gently brushed along my bottom lip, cueing me to lift my teeth.

  “They’re all fine. Elias is getting treatment for the lingering poison from the arrow. Aspen apparently coated the edge; the poison probably his insurance if the arrow didn’t do enough damage. Lucky for Elias, fairies can survive any type of poison. He was still affected, but it didn’t kill him. Daniel is resting, and Marcus is out on a run to keep his own anxiety down,” Ryder explained.

  I sighed in relief; my tense body relaxed into his arms. Everyone is okay…but how?

  “Midnight saved us.” Ryder replied to my spoken thoughts.

  “Midnight! What happened when I passed out?” I questioned. I searched within myself for her presence; my consciousness wavered slightly, before I noticed her flickering, burning essence deep within me. I sighed in relief at my discovery.

  “Midnight had healed Elias by the time we reached you guys. She told us she had a plan and we had to trust her. We agreed before Aspen decided to blast us with waves of wind. Marcus and Elias ended up slipping, the wind carrying them to the edge. Daniel and I tried to pull them back up, but the wind was too strong. Then he conjured an orb of energy. It hit the ground in front of us, causing us to fall. I thought we were goners, but we fell into a net made up of white strings before a magic circle awakened, concealing our energies. Our markings suddenly began to glow, we had no idea what was going on, but in a flash, bursts of light expelled from us, heading straight into the sky and fading away. It was a diversion to make it seem as if we’d truly died. Then we saw your body dropping towards us before you started to shift. In a flash, you were in dragon form; I’m assuming Lexi took over. You glided right above the lava, hiding in a blind spot. We waited until we felt the air shift, it was then that Matthew and Karen came to the rescue. Lexi helped us, by flying us back up the cliff and then you shifted back. That was two and a half weeks ago,” he finished.

  I stared at him, absorbing all the delivered information slowly. Midnight saved them. She defied the Owner, to save the boys. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Midnight. I could feel a light pulse of energy course through me, as if Midnight herself was acknowledging my gratitude.

  “Two weeks huh? I guess we failed the exam,” I pondered to myself.

  “We passed. Professor Sepherant was none other than the Jeffrey person you mentioned. By the time Matthew received the information from his resources, we’d already entered the exam. Now, he is nowhere to be found, sending an untraceable resignation letter. The headmaster is facing some major backlash; the details of the event were forwarded straight to Heila. They’re sending someone back to escort all of us home. We got that information three days ago, so it shouldn’t be long,” he admitted.

  “So, we got to keep playing student…” I sighed, yawning lightly. I could feel the exhaustion slowly crept into my body.

  “Well, we’ve been granted time off, seeing as we’re still technically students here and its summer break. Till Karen gives the approval for you to use magic, we have to stick with our alibi. You pushed your body beyond your magic threshold which puts you at risk,” he ordered.

  I frowned at him.

  “What about my spirits?” I questioned quietly, realizing how quiet it had been in my mind.

  Did I drain them to the point of them ascending to the gods? I shouldn’t have pushed them to such limits. Did they truly leave me?

  Before I could continue, I felt the four spirits crowd my head
at once, causing me to flinch.

  “You can’t get rid of us that easily,” Rose mumbled.

  “Aww, she missed us,” Lexi cooed.

  “Mako, you’re okay! I missed you. Ignore those two.” Hope beamed happily.

  “Welcome back Makoto. We’re proud of you for not giving up. We love you,” Lily confessed, softly.

  Though their voices varied from relieved to joy, I could sense their exhaustion. Ryder smiled at me.

  “I guess they answered that question,” he confirmed, smirking.

  I nodded, allowing my head to rest against his chest. I felt tired, wanting to rest, but afraid to lose more time with Ryder.

  His hand stroked my cheek; my eyes opened to stare at him. His eyes lingered on my lips, before he leaned forward, kissing me softly.

  This kiss felt different. We weren’t eager to deepen it or rub our hands along each other. We stayed very still; Ryder leaned above me as I relaxed against the bed. The kiss was light, small kisses pressed against my lips as we held one another. I could sense his hesitation, treating me like a fragile object – the slightest slip prompting me to fall to the ground, shattering into pieces.

  His body felt tense with worry, probably still concerned about my well-being, but as we continued kissing one another, holding each other to secure our combined warmth, his body relaxed. When we finally pulled away, he kissed my forehead before facing me.

  “Makoto, you know what this means?” he questioned, his face lit up with happiness and determination. I frowned at his question, tilting my head.

  “I don’t know…we get an overdue vacation,” I mumbled.

  “No Firefly, though we do need a long ass vacation after the shit we just went through,” he admitted, chuckling lightly.

  My heart felt slightly warmer as I listened to his laugh.

  He smiled wickedly, before continuing. “We’re ghosts, Mako. Blair Aspen thinks were dead, all of us. It’s the perfect opportunity for us to return to Heila undetected and without risking your safety. Everything falls into place.”

  I felt my spirits all rejoice, allowing myself to enjoy the overwhelming happiness that wanted to explode. We we’re the first to walk away from King Aspen’s clutches, underhandedly surviving his plans to destroy us. As the word ghost lingered in my mind, I couldn’t ignore the temptation any longer.

  “Casper the friendly ghost, the friendliest ghost you know!” I began to sing, giggling at Ryder’s expression as he sighed.

  “Babe, you always know how to ruin a moment. I’m banning you from chilling in Marcus’ room. All he’s doing is converting you into a shifter of Earthala.” He groaned, turning himself in a quick movement; his hands pinned me to the bed as he loomed over me, cutting my giggle fit short as my body clenched in desire. I could see the passion and underlying motive in his hooded Tyrian eyes, awakening my sudden cravings for him.

  “Makoto?” He whispered; his voice low and husky as he leaned forward. His lips brushed against mine.

  “Yes Ryder?” I whispered back, biting my lip to hold back from pressing my lips against his. The corner of his lips curled, a captivating smile forming on those luscious lips I craved for as he pressed his forehead against mine.

  “I love you,” he confessed, kissing me lightly on the lips. I smiled against his lips, allowing my hands to wrap around his neck, pressing myself against him.

  “I love you too, Ryder Carter,” I whispered, kissing him back.

  I didn’t know what the stars had in store for myself and my star knights, but the unknown didn’t scare me anymore. All I needed to do was follow the path towards the light, with my loved ones by my side.

  No matter what hardships we’d be forced to face, the light would guide us home. Thank you, dear Starlight gods, for the people in my life. Thank you for never giving up on me…on all of me. I am yours to use to fight such darkness…to prevent anyone else from enduring such tragedy and despair. Help me, so I can bring salvation to all those trapped in the dark.

  In stars, we trust.

  “Can we go back home?” I whispered against Ryder’s chest.

  I was currently cradled against his chest under the white blankets. It was three in the morning, and I was attempting to keep myself awake. Ryder had tried waking up the boys, but they seemed to be deep in sleep. He didn’t want to scare them awake, concerned they would jump to the conclusion something was wrong with me, but I was anxious to see them, to feel their warmth.

  I still struggled to rid myself of the memories that followed me when I attempted to close my eyes.

  I felt like a tainted rose – a flower once pure and white.

  Now, I was darkened by the evil that held me captive. The evil I successfully escaped only to meet face to face in a ruthless battle of life and death. Blair Aspen had taken so much from me in all my cycles.

  I thought I had come to terms with having to endure the events he had put me through. Constantly pushing myself, pushing me past what I thought was my limit. I had watched so many other shifters die because of being pushed that far. I guess I should be grateful to still be alive and breathing.

  “Do you want to go back there? Would you feel more comfortable? I’ll make sure it’s just our group until you’re strong enough to deal with the other students. Just in case anyone thinks its a bright idea to try and challenge you,” Ryder suggested.

  I pressed myself against him as I tightened my grip around his waist.

  “I’d teach them a good lesson if they even attempted to challenge you.”

  I smiled against Ryder’s skin at Rose’s statement. I’ve missed your sassy self.

  “I know. We missed you dearly, Makoto.”

  I could sense the sincerity in her voice, the sound so far away from her usual toneless voice.

  “Ya. If it’s just us...can we go back? I don’t like medical centers,” I whispered.

  The white walls reminded me of that perfect white suit, those piercing red eyes stared at me with rage. I shivered at the thought. Ryder tightened his grip around me; his lips pressed against my forehead.

  “It’s okay Mako. You’re safe in my arms, my love. We’ll get everything set and we can head back to our little home in Knightwood. Okay?” he soothed. His lips brushed my skin as he spoke.

  “It’s not little and okay. Just don’t leave me, okay?” I just needed to be with him for a while longer.

  “I’ll hold you in my arms the whole way if I must, my princess,” he declared.

  I lifted my head to stare up at him.

  He looked so different, especially with his recent unshaven, medium length beard. I could see the dark circles under his eyes, those usual vivid Tyrian eyes I loved were losing their light. Hmm...he looks like he just survived two weeks of living on an island with only the primary essentials of food and water.

  A genuine smile formed on his lips, before he lowered his head to kiss me gently. He was still hesitant in his kisses, not allowing his lips to linger longer than five seconds. I didn’t care if I almost died; I wanted more of him – to taste more of him.

  “I feel like I was left on an island with only the fear of losing my true love that was miles away,” he admitted. The pain still lingered in his voice, but he looked amused at my outspoken thoughts.

  “Sorry,” I whispered pressing my lips against his neck; my action of affection rewarded me with a deep moan.

  “I’ve missed your kisses,” he whispered, allowing me to continue kissing his warm rose scented flesh.

  “I’ve missed you, too,” I replied, returning my gaze up at him.

  I unhooked my left hand, my other buried beneath him as we continued to lay side to side in an embrace, to caress his beard, the hair feeling smooth given its rough appearance.

  “You don’t like it?” he questioned with an amused smirk on his lips.

  “I never said that.” I continued to rub my thumb against the fine hairs.

  “You don’t need to with your facial expression.”

  “Hmm.
..well, if I have to be honest...you do need a trim,” I admitted.

  “A trim or a shave, sweetheart?”

  “A trim...that rids of all this hair hindering me from feeling your smooth skin,” I mused.

  He chuckled as he closed his eyes to shake his head.

  “Whatever you like, Firefly.”

  I allowed my free hand to push gently against his chest, pushing him down to his back as I moved my body to lie on top of him, sitting up slightly while my hand glided through my long, flowing locks of hair.

  I seriously needed to trim it – the length reached my lower back. I’d let Daniel work his magic on it when we got back home.

  “Ryder,” I whispered, my voice low and filled with need.

  His eyes roamed over my body, which thanks to Ryder’s assistance was covered in one of his white thin t-shirts. Its purpose to cover my body was fulfilled, but the thin fabric didn’t stop my neon pink bra from showing through, my lower half pressed against his.

  I bit my lip, my eyes stuck on his lips, wanting more than those fragile kisses.

  “Mako...you should be resting,” he encouraged, but the way his eyes locked on mine, before centering on my bitten lip told me otherwise. His hardness below me wasn’t supporting his claim either.

  “Kiss me Ryder...properly. Kiss me like this would be our last moment together...please?” I whispered, begging for his affection. I needed to know if he still truly cared about me, even if I was tainted by the darkness.

  He closed his eyes for a moment, as if contemplating on what he should do. Before my heart sank with disappointment, his arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me down to him, smashing his lips against mine, greedily.

  I moaned as we kissed, my hand pressed against his chest as he held me in place; his free hand flowed through my hair before steadying my head as his lips continued to ravage mine.

  I didn’t hesitate as I allowed my tongue to brush along his lower lip, asking permission to enter. He groaned before he allowed my tongue to slip in; his groin pushed between my legs. Electricity rushed through me as my throbbing clit rubbed against his hardness.