The Palace of Lost Memories

by CJ Archer

  She drew me into a hug. "You're not selfish, Josie. You're the least selfish person I know."

  I shook my head. "Not that day. That day, I wanted to get away from him. I met with Captain Hammer at Half Moon Cove."

  Her eyes widened. "Well. I see." She nudged me and smiled. "No wonder you won't look twice at my brother."

  "It's not like that. He had a professional question to ask me."

  "Then why not come here and ask your father?"

  "It's difficult to explain."

  "No, Josie, it's not. It sounds to me like he likes you."

  I sighed. I couldn't tell her without divulging the palace secrets, and I wouldn't do that. Not even to Meg. She'd have to think what she wanted to think. I only hoped she didn't spread rumors through the village about Hammer and me.

  "You will encourage him, won't you?" she asked, peering closely at me.

  "What do you mean?"

  "Now that you're all alone, you need someone to take care of you."

  It was so absurd I would have laughed if I didn't feel so sad. "I'm not going to marry just because I'm alone."

  "Why are you so against marriage?"

  "I'm not. I don't want to marry just anybody though. Besides, I hardly know him." He hardly knew himself.

  "You're talking about love again." She sighed and touched the wine-colored birthmark creeping up from her neck, over her jaw to her right ear. "Not all of us expect love to strike but I'm sure it will strike you—if you allow it to."

  I put my arm around her and kissed the mark but said nothing. I'd offered her sympathy and words of hope many times over the years, yet she still believed herself ugly. It might not be such a problem if she weren't so desperate to marry, but after watching all of our other friends wed in recent years, she'd probably take the first man who asked.

  "Ivor Morgrain has been very attentive to you," she said with a wicked gleam in her eye.

  "I don't want to talk about Ivor."

  "I'm sure you don't. Not after secretly meeting with the delectable captain of the palace guards at Half Moon Cove."

  "Meg…" I shook my head. "I'm not in the mood."

  "Of course. I'm sorry. Let me fix you something to eat. You're looking thinner than usual." She hugged me then entered the larder. She returned with some dark bread and shriveled apples. "Honestly, Josie, you can't eat this."

  "I haven't been to the market since he died."

  "I'll go for you in the morning." She set the bread down and began slicing it while I fetched her some money for the market.

  I found a few ells in the tin where we kept enough for daily supplies and handed it all to her. "For tomorrow," I said. "I'll be fine in a day or two. I just don't feel like seeing people right now. I've had enough of sympathetic words to last a lifetime."

  She skewered a slice of bread on the end of the knife and held it out to me. "Let me know when you are ready, and I'll come with you. Anyone who dares offer you sympathy will have to deal with me."

  I smiled, despite myself, and gave her a hug.

  The footman dressed in crimson palace livery standing on my doorstep looked familiar. It wasn't until he gave me a thorough inspection that I remembered seeing him in the palace's service corridors the night I'd become lost searching for the garrison. I hadn't trusted him that night and didn't want to be alone with him in a dark place. Now, I had nowhere to escape to. My father's warnings came back to me all at once.

  The footman licked his lips. "The goddess shone down on Glancia when she made its women."

  "Can I help you?" I asked.

  His wet lips stretched into a smile, revealing an overcrowded mouth full of crooked teeth. He stepped forward. I moved to close the door in his face, but he thrust his foot into the gap. "Don't do that, miss. I have a message for the doctor. Is he in?"

  "You can pass your message on to me."

  His top lip lifted with his sneer. "Even the low-born ones act all high and mighty here." He sniffed. "Tell your father he's wanted at the palace urgently."

  "Why? What's happened?"

  "He's needed."

  "Is Lady Miranda sick again?"

  "Don't know."

  I opened my mouth to tell him I'd go with him, but closed it again. I couldn't go. I wasn't qualified to treat anyone unless they were giving birth. While some villagers might not care about qualifications, the king's advisors and the nobles certainly would. I couldn't hide behind my father anymore. As his assistant, my presence in the sickroom was acceptable. Without him, it was not.

  "Who sent you?" I asked the footman.

  "Theodore."

  "Please inform Theodore that my father died last week. He'll have to ask the finance minister's doctor for assistance, if he's still at the palace."

  The footman was shocked into stepping back, allowing me to close and lock the door. I pressed my forehead against it and listened to the sound of receding hoof beats.

  A very short time later, I opened the door to another knock. I was relieved to find Captain Hammer on the doorstep, not the footman. His cheeks were flushed and his hair windswept, but it didn't take away from the air of solemnity he brought with him.

  "I'm saddened to hear about your father," he said. "We all are."

  "Thank you." I opened the door wider but he hesitated.

  "I don't want to intrude."

  "You're not. I could do with the company. The house is so quiet and…oh, you probably have to get back to the king."

  "Soon," he said, stepping past me. His hand went to the hilt of the sword strapped to his hip, as if it were a natural, ingrained reaction. When he realized what he was doing, his hand dropped to his side. After a moment, he clasped both hands behind him.

  "Ale?" I asked, leading the way to the kitchen. "Or a tisane of mildwood to calm your nerves?"

  His footsteps changed rhythm and I smiled to myself. I really shouldn't tease him when he was feeling ill at ease.

  "Ale is fine. I can't stay long." He watched as I filled two cups then sat at the table when I sat. "I didn't know," he said simply. "I would have come sooner."

  "I don't expect you to know, but thank you."

  "Was his health failing?"

  "His heart must have been. The morning of his death, he was taking catspaw for an irregular heartbeat. He never mentioned anything out of the ordinary to me, though." I stared into the cup, cradled between both hands. "It's so typical of him not to worry me, but I wish he had. I may not have been able to cure him, but I could have stayed here and been with him when he…" I bit down hard on my wobbling lip, determined not to cry. A tear escaped anyway. I dashed it away and drank deeply.

  Hammer shifted on the chair, drawing his feet under it, and leaned forward. "I'm surprised to find you here. I thought you would be with relatives."

  "I have none. I stayed at a neighbor's house for two nights, but I don't want to impose on them any longer. Besides, I had to face being on my own sooner or later."

  He frowned. "You're going to remain here? Alone?"

  "Of course. This is my home. Where else would I go?"

  I was glad he let the matter drop. Perhaps his lack of memory meant he didn't know that young, unwed women rarely lived alone. The world accepted widows living on their own after their husbands died, but daughters of marriageable age moved in with relatives, no matter how distant. I could not name a single woman in a similar position to me. No matter. I would simply be the first.

  "Is there anything I can do while I'm here?" he asked, looking up at the roof as if he expected to find it needing repairs. "Heavy lifting? Chopping firewood?"

  "Thank you, but no. I've managed with an elderly father for years. Meg's brother—my neighbor—helps with anything I can't do myself."

  "I see I don't have to worry about you."

  It was nice that he did worry. "You have enough on your plate, Captain. Speaking of which, what happened at the palace that required my father's attendance?"

  "Lady Lucia Whippler fainted while walking ar
ound the garden."

  "How is she now?"

  "She was resting in her room when I left to come here. The finance minister's doctor looked at her and suggested she simply got overheated. He prescribed bathing her feet in cool water."

  "Were her feet swollen?"

  "I don't believe so."

  "Then bathing them won't achieve much." I looked out the window to the overcast sky. "I haven't been outside today but it didn't seem all that warm when I opened the door to you."

  "It's not. It's pleasant and Lady Lucia walks with the king every day, when it's sometimes much warmer. She has never appeared to suffer from the heat before."

  "Particularly on a mild day?"

  "Precisely."

  In my experience, women who fainted for no apparent reason usually had one thing in common—pregnancy.

  "The king wasn't satisfied with Doctor Clegg's diagnosis and wanted your father to look at Lady Lucia," Hammer went on. "His Majesty trusts—trusted—your father after he successfully treated Lady Miranda."

  "He must have been disappointed when Theodore told him of my father's death."

  He concentrated on his cup before drinking.

  "Captain? What did the king say?"

  "The king can be selfish. He can't often see beyond his own needs."

  I took that to mean he wasn't entirely sympathetic, but more frustrated that my father was no longer at his service. That didn't strike me as a good quality for a king to have but I held my tongue. Hammer was too loyal to want to hear my opinion. "What did he say?" I asked again.

  "He told Thoedore to send for you. Theodore refused, telling him you're grieving. His Majesty then sought me out. I also refused to send for you."

  "You came though."

  "I wanted to make sure you're all right."

  "You didn't have to."

  His fingers stroked the cup. After a moment, he lifted it to his lips and drained the contents.

  "But thank you," I said. "I appreciate it."

  He set the cup down and stood. "I must go."

  "I'm coming with you. Give me a moment to gather my things."

  "No, Josie. You're grieving."

  "That doesn't mean I can't be useful. I'm bored here, Captain. There's nothing to do except think, and right now, I don't want to think. Besides, I believe I know what might be ailing Lady Lucia."

  His brows rose. "You do?"

  "I'll need to see her to be absolutely certain."

  "What is it?"

  "I can't tell you," I said, heading to my father's workshop. I glanced at the desk and tried not to picture the way I'd found him that day, slumped forward, surrounded by his books and apparatus. I swallowed the ball of tears clogging my throat and picked up my pack. It already had the things I needed for this visit and I indicated to Hammer that I was ready.

  "Do you suspect poisoning?" he asked as he opened the front door for me.

  "No, but I will need to see her to completely rule it out." I locked the door and displayed the GONE FISHING sign.

  Hammer waited for me by his horse. I would have to sit in front of him. I clutched my pack to my chest but handed it to him when he held out his hand for it.

  "If her ailment is a threat to the king's safety, I'll have to insist you tell me," he said. "Patient confidentiality may be important to your profession, but saving the king's life is important to mine."

  I smiled. A baby would not threaten the king's life, and his reputation would only be bolstered if it were his. Kings were lauded for their virility, even if their children were born out of wedlock. Commoners, on the other hand, were reviled. I may need to reassure Hammer and the king that he had nothing to fear if the test proved positive. They might not be aware of society's double standards.

  Hammer assisted me onto the saddle then settled behind me. I was very aware of his presence and the stares from my neighbors. I nodded at Ivor Morgrain as we passed him walking along my street. He carried a clutch of wild flowers but it wasn't until he flung them onto the ground that I realized he was on his way to see me. Perfect timing. I did not want to be alone with Ivor. I'd already refused his offer of courtship last year, telling him my father needed me. I could no longer use that excuse.

  "A word of caution, Captain," I said. "I am not a qualified doctor and should not be attending a patient. This visit needs to remain a secret."

  "Doctor Clegg reminded the king that you can't attend patients. The king insisted, however, and the doctor graciously backed down. It was Theodore and myself who wouldn't allow you to come at this time."

  "I must still insist on keeping my visit a secret. If the doctor thinks I'm reaching beyond my midwifery duties, he's within his rights to have me arrested."

  "Arrested!" His breath brushed the nape of my neck. "For treating a patient in the palace at the king's request? That's absurd."

  "It's the law."

  He scoffed. "Be assured, King Leon wouldn't allow you to be arrested on his account, no matter what the law states."

  "Even so, let's not put the king in a difficult position. If someone asks why I'm there, we shall say I'm calling on a maid who needs a midwife."

  "That will only get the tongues wagging."

  "Very well, we'll say I've come to visit…Quentin?"

  "That will suffice. He has been asking to go to the village to see you. It's very annoying."

  I laughed softly. "He's harmless and simply curious about medical matters. He wants to learn."

  "He is inquisitive, but I don't think medicine is entirely to blame for his interest in you."

  I turned to look at him better but he was focused on the road ahead. "Quentin is sweet, but I don't want to encourage him."

  "Then don't call him sweet to his face. He'll take it as a compliment and never leave you alone. What about the man with the flowers?"

  The question came so suddenly and unexpectedly that I couldn't think of an immediate answer.

  "You saw him?" I said, somewhat pathetically.

  "I couldn't fail to feel the sharpness of his glare. Do I need to smooth things over with him and reassure him that I'm simply transporting you to the palace?"

  "Merdu, no. Let him think what he likes. Hopefully that'll put an end to his attentions. He has called on me three times this week alone and we ran out of conversation on his first visit." The flowers were a new development, though.

  "As you wish," was all he said.

  I was able to relax a little as we left the village and curious stares behind. I still felt self-conscious having the captain so close, but I tried to ignore him and simply enjoy the fresh air and the patchwork of farmlands and forest. I'd been inside far too long, wallowing in self-pity, when I should have been appreciative to be alive. Tomorrow, I would call on those who'd attended the funeral to thank them. I'd visit my father's patients and reassure them that I would help them if it were an emergency as long as they kept quiet about it. That led to thoughts of finding a new doctor for the village. Perhaps I would write to the college in Logios and request them to send a newly qualified one. I must also see to my own patients, two of whom were drawing close to their time.

  "You think Lady Lucia is with child," Hammer said.

  I'd been so lost in my thoughts that his words startled me. "What makes you say that?"

  "It's the only reason you can give for coming to the palace with your medical bag. And you said yourself that you didn't want to put the king in a difficult situation by illegally seeing a patient. You're not the sort of person who wants to cause trouble for others."

  "I might be. You don't know that."

  "I'm a good judge of character, Josie." He sounded amused.

  Our arrival at the palace earned us a few raised brows and curious stares from the other servants, but mostly they were too busy going about their work to notice. Indeed, it was the palace servants and not the visiting ones who took the most interest. I felt their gazes on me even after we passed by.

  Unlike Miranda's rooms, there were no guards p
osted in the corridor outside Lady Lucia's. Like Miranda, she was housed on the first floor in a sizeable bedroom, but she did not have her own sitting room. Miranda must still be the favorite.

  Hammer knocked on the door and a call of "One moment," came from the other side. It was several moments before we were invited in.

  The patient sat up on a large bed, her long hair cascading around her, as bright as the golden palace gates. Her skin had a good color and her eyes were quick as they assessed me and then Hammer.

  "Who are you?" asked her brother, standing beside the bed.

  "Miss Cully will assess Lady Lucia's condition," the captain said.

  "The doctor has already seen her. He has prescribed rest. You're the captain of the guards, are you not?"

  "Captain Hammer. If you'll come with me, sir, Miss Cully needs to see the patient alone."

  Lord Frederick bristled. "I'm staying with my sister."

  "No, sir, you are not." Hammer stood aside to indicate Lord Frederick should go ahead of him.

  Lord Frederick took his sister's hand. Knowing the rumors about them, I found I couldn't tear my gaze away from those linked hands. That's how I came to see his thumb caress hers. "I don't understand," he said. "Why does Miss Cully need to see my sister alone?"

  "Isn't Cully the name of the doctor who attended Miranda?" Lady Lucia asked.

  "I'm his daughter." I focused on the small dent on the tip of her otherwise fine nose in the hope the concentration would stop any tears from welling. "My father passed away last week."

  That took the puff out of Lord Frederick's chest. "We're sorry for your loss, but I must protest again. You can't assume your father's role."

  "I don't intend to."

  Lady Lucia clicked her tongue and muttered, "For Merdu's sake. My brother has already told you, an actual doctor has prescribed rest. I was doing just that until you two barged in. Kindly leave or I'll inform the king that you've overstepped. I'm sure he'd be interested to learn you've been impersonating a doctor."