The Doctor Wears A Stetson (Contemporary Western Romance)

by Anne Marie Novark

  She cleared her throat and stuck out her hand. Cameron took it in his warm grasp and the current of electricity flowing up her arm nearly short-circuited her brain cells. Time stood still in that moment. Then Cameron released her hand and Jessie tried to smile. She knew it must be a poor excuse for a smile, because she could feel her mouth trembling in time to her pounding heart.

  Courage, Jessie. You can do this.

  She cleared her throat again. "I'm honored to present you the Chamber of Commerce's 'Welcome to Town' golden pin." She opened the small plastic box and removed the pin. Taking hold of the lapel of Cameron's sport coat, the same one he'd worn to the Valentine's Dance, Jessie affixed the small golden pin, then quickly stepped away. The audience once again broke out in applause.

  Cameron moved close and kissed her cheek. "Thank you, Jess. This means a lot to me."

  His deep beloved voice seeped into her very soul. Jessie couldn't speak, only nodded, her throat clogged with unshed tears. She needed to get out of here now. But she couldn't without being impossibly rude.

  "Won't you say a few words, Dr. McCade?" Mayor Vandeford asked.

  "Of course." Cameron winked at Jessie before taking his place at the podium. She couldn't stop the flutter in her heart. He'd given her a look like he wasn't through with her and her body thrummed with excitement and dread. He didn't look like a man whose marriage proposal had so recently been rejected.

  Jessie didn't wait to hear what Cameron said to the crowd. She didn't care if she was acting rudely. She had to get home. She had to get away from Cameron McCade and the knowledge that she'd stupidly thrown away her last chance at happiness.

  ****

  Cameron waited as long as he could before following Jessie to her house. The drive out of town took twenty minutes. Twenty minutes to figure out what he wanted to say.

  He pulled off the pavement and headed down the winding dirt road leading to the Devine place. He hadn't been to her house since the Valentine's Dance. It seemed forever. He'd been too shocked the night she'd refused his proposal to ask her for her reasons. He'd gotten over the shock and was ready to hear those reasons now.

  He was looking for answers, damn it. And tonight he'd get her to talk. And he'd get her into bed, too. His body ached to hold her again. Be inside her again. Make them one.

  He parked the Jag in front of the house and walked up to the porch. The lights were on. Welcoming? Or warning him to stay away?

  Too damned bad. He was here and there was no turning back.

  Cameron knocked on the door and waited. His hands felt clammy and his heartbeat quickened.

  After what seemed like an eternity, Jessie finally opened the door, then just stood there looking out the screen at him. The dog and cat flanked her, guarding her.

  Hell, he wasn't the enemy. He loved her.

  "Ask me in, Jess."

  She bit her lip. "Why?"

  Cameron took a deep breath. Now wasn't the time to lose his temper. "We need to talk."

  Jessie nodded and opened the door. Cameron entered the living room. Sherlock barked once, then nudged his hand, inviting him to pet him.

  Cameron rubbed the dog's ears, watching Jessie. She walked over to the heater and warmed her backside. She was still wearing the powder blue dress she'd worn to the council meeting.

  God, he loved that dress. She'd worn it to his mother's party where he'd taken her to the barn and . . .

  Cameron sighed. That was over four months ago. When they'd been fighting the attraction between them. When Jess had been fighting and he'd just wanted to get her into bed.

  She was still fighting. But now, Cameron wanted more than just getting Jessie into bed. He wanted it all.

  He closed the distance between them and took her in his arms. She belonged in his arms. Couldn't she feel it? Couldn't she feel the rightness? "I think it's time you told me why you think you can't marry me."

  "You make it sound like I don't know my own mind," she said, trying to push away. He tightened his hold and she sighed. "I don't think I can't marry you, Cameron. I know I can't . . . shouldn't . . . let me go." Again, she tried to wiggle out of his arms.

  "I don't want to let you go. Ever." Cameron stared deeply into Jess' eyes. Beautiful green eyes sparkling with tears. Something was definitely wrong.

  He kissed the wet cheeks. He hated to see her so unhappy. "What's the matter, Jess? I thought you'd be happy that I was back in town. You told me it was your dream for me to take over the clinic. I thought you wanted me to move to Salt Fork. I thought you wanted me. Was I wrong?"

  Jessie shook her head, her short blond hair bouncing with the movement. "I did want you . . . do want you--" She sniffed and swiped at her nose. "Damn. I'm not going to cry. I should just tell you what's bothering me, but I don't know how."

  Cameron hugged her close and kissed the top of her forehead. "Try, Jess. I asked you to marry me, for crying out loud. I love you. And you love me; I know it. We can work this out, whatever it is. It can't be so very bad, can it?"

  "It's pretty bad," she whispered, not looking at him, but fiddling with the gold pin on his jacket lapel. The pin she had presented to him only a couple of hours ago. "I think it's bad."

  "Tell me, sweetheart."

  He felt her stiffen in his arms, as if she were preparing herself for an assault or something.

  "I can't have children," she blurted out. "You said you want kids. TR wanted a baby more than anything and I failed him. I promised myself not to do anything that I'd live to regret any more if I can help it. And I mean to stick to that promise."

  "Look at me, Jess."

  She shook her head and sniffled again.

  Cameron's chest tightened. Jessie was one stubborn woman. If she decided something, it took an act of Congress to make her change her mind. He suddenly felt her slipping from him. He couldn't let her go, couldn't let her get away. He'd let her go once before. He couldn't do it again.

  Tucking a finger beneath her chin, he tilted her head until she was forced to meet his gaze. "I love you, Jess. It's taken me a hell of a long time to realize that. I've lived with the restlessness my whole life. But when I came back for Mom's birthday party, the restless feeling left. And you know why? Because I found you again."

  "But I can't marry you," she said with a sob. "I can't live with the knowledge I won't be able to give you children. I just can't do that again." A big tear slid down her cheek and Cameron caught it with his thumb. She was killing him. But she was hurting, too. He wanted to make her better. He was a doctor. It's what he did. Made people better.

  "Did you have fertility tests done when you were married to TR?" he asked, stroking her soft hair.

  Her head jerked up and she sniffed. "What?"

  "Fertility tests. You know, to see if you were ovulating? Did TR have any tests done? How do you know it was your fault?"

  Jessie shook her head and wiped her eyes. "He didn't want any tests done. He didn't want to get caught up in all of that technical stuff. Besides, those tests are expensive and the little insurance we had wouldn't cover them. TR just wanted it to happen naturally. He said if it happened, it happened. He was just being nice. I knew how disappointed he was. I can't do that to you, Cameron."

  "Look, Jess. Forget about the kids," he said. "All I want is you. We could always adopt, you know."

  "It wouldn't be the same." She wiggled out of his embrace and stepped away, crossing her arms, rubbing herself as if she were cold. "Maybe you'd better leave."

  "I don't want to leave. In fact, I'm not leaving," he said, shucking off his jacket and throwing it on the couch. "I want you too much. Please, Jess. Make love with me."

  "I don't think we should--"

  He loosened his tie. "One more time, sweetheart. Let's make love one more time."

  If only he could get her in bed, he believed he could change her mind. He wanted to make sweet love to her, seduce her, remind her what they had together. Remind her how many years they'd wasted already. They didn't need to
waste another minute, as far as Cameron was concerned.

  He took her in his arms again and captured her lips, tasting coffee and Jessie's own sweetness. She held back a few moments, and he thought he'd lost, thought she was going to refuse him, but finally she melted against him and he breathed a sigh of relief.

  Cameron pulled her onto his lap and moved his body against her, prodding her warm softness, while plundering her sweet mouth. She moaned and wrapped her arms around his neck.

  "We shouldn't do this," she said, her words vibrating against his lips.

  "Shh, we're doing this."

  Jessie sighed and he took the kiss deeper, plunging his tongue into her mouth, holding her close. She played with the hair at the nape of his neck. He loved when she did that. Suddenly, he was on fire and needed more than a kiss.

  Jessie knew the instant the kiss changed from exploratory to hot and vital. Cameron cradled her butt in his big strong hands and lifted her against him, so she could feel his arousal and how much he wanted her.

  "I need you, Jess," he growled in her ear, sending goose bumps flittering down her spine.

  She couldn't fight the inevitable and gave herself up to the wonderful feelings of passion only this man could stoke deep within her. One last time, she thought. One last time to be with Cameron.

  Jessie took his hand and brought it to her mouth. She kissed the center of his palm. "Let's continue this in bed."

  "Excellent idea." He smiled the sexy smile that always made her stomach crater. "Lead the way." With his hands on her shoulders, he followed her to the bedroom.

  She pulled back the quilts on the large four-poster bed. The sound of Cameron's zipper shattered the quiet of the room and froze her in place. Jessie knew she really shouldn't be making love with Cameron again. Not when she'd already refused to marry him. But she could no more resist the desire burning between them than the urge to replace a noisy muffler on an old car. Her breath caught in her lungs when Cameron stood close behind, his naked body rubbing the thin cloth of her panties, his strong hands grasping her narrow waist, pulling her to him.

  Cameron reached around to cup her breasts. "Watch my hands, Jess," he whispered in her ear, as he unfastened her bra.

  Slowly the lacy material eased away from her rounded curves and the fabric teased her nipples. Cameron raked his nails softly across the satiny mounds, following the path of the lace with his fingers. He weighed her breasts in his palms, gently squeezing the firm flesh and brushing his thumbs across the nipples.

  Jessie saw the rigid peaks pucker in response. Cameron's fingers traced the rosy ring at the center of each breast, outlining the curvature of the swells, dipping into the valley between, moving slowly up to the base, stopping just short of the nipples. He trailed light, feathery touches--some fast, some slow--over her sensitive skin. He focused his attention on the soft fleshy mounds, deliberately neglecting the tight swollen beads that ached to be touched.

  He placed a finger to her lips. "Open your mouth."

  Moistening his index finger against her tongue, he swirled the wetness around and around the base of her nipples, leaning over her shoulder to blow each one in turn.

  Every nerve ending in Jessie's body tensed from the seductive torture. "Please . . ." she begged, her voice a ragged sob.

  Cameron's fingers hovered above the nipples.

  Jessie moaned low, as if in pain. She arched toward the teasing hands. "Cameron . . ."

  He flicked the tips of the turgid peaks, lightly brushing across the sensitive beads. Once, twice. He kept his fingers close, barely making contact.

  Jessie's body involuntarily bucked. She grabbed his hands and placed them on her breasts, urging him to caress her fully.

  Cameron massaged the heated flesh. The sight of Jessie's white hands on top of his dark ones, helping him give her pleasure, threatened his control. He wedged one knee between her legs and rubbed back and forth. He felt her dampness on the top of his thigh. His erection throbbed and hardened even more. Lifting Jessie off the floor, he eased her onto the bed, flat on her stomach.

  He tore her panties down the length of her legs and tossed them aside. Kneeling above her, Cameron kissed the curve of her neck. Her skin was soft and smooth. He trailed his tongue down her spine, kneaded both cheeks of her bottom with his hands, and licked the two dimples at the small of her back.

  Suddenly, he flipped her over.

  Jessie's eyes widened and dilated. She reached toward him. "Let me touch you," she whispered.

  Cameron straddled her. He gritted his teeth as her fingers closed around him, caressing, stroking.

  He moved away. "Keep that up, and we'll be finished before we're good and started."

  Her husky laugh titillated his senses. He took her mouth in a hot savage kiss. She held him close and matched the movements of his tongue with her own.

  Cameron stretched out beside her. He kissed her again, dipping into the honeyed flavor only Jessie could provide. He butted his shaft against her thigh and felt the urgent need to plunge himself into her. But not yet. Not yet.

  He kissed the corners of her mouth and the tip of her nose, then pulled away. Jessie groaned in disappointment and sought to bring him close again. Gently, he pushed her back against the pillows. "I want to kiss you all over, sweetheart."

  He took one nipple into his mouth and sucked hard. A deep moan erupted from Jessie's throat. Sliding his hand down her flat stomach, he twined his fingers in her soft curls. Gently, he teased the velvety folds, lightly brushing, touching, applying the same sweet torture he'd inflicted on her breasts just minutes before.

  Jessie gripped his shoulders. Her nails bit deeply into his skin. Cameron bent to lave her navel with his tongue, then trailed kisses down her abdomen. He stopped just above the dark triangle of hair and looked up. Jessie's face was flushed with desire, her eyes drugged with passion.

  Cameron felt himself flex in response to the yearning in those eyes. Slowly, ever so slowly, he spread open the soft folds with gentle fingers. Softly, so softly, he nuzzled her most intimate flesh.

  Jessie's hips bucked upward. The exquisite rasp of Cameron's tongue released the surge of tension he had so expertly nurtured. She tangled her fingers in his hair, trying to find a handhold, as her body erupted in pleasure.

  "Now, Cameron," she said. "I need you."

  He pulled her beneath him and spread her legs apart. Lowering himself, he slid inside her moist heat. He waited a moment, enjoying the feel of Jessie's warm flesh holding him, caressing him.

  "Please, Cameron." Jessie cupped his jaws with trembling fingers.

  He turned his head to kiss each palm, then started making love to her. He moved over her, in her. Deep inside, then away. Pull and push. Slow, then fast. Jessie matched his thrusts, her inner muscles contracting, squeezing him.

  Cameron groaned with satisfaction as his body convulsed in orgasm. Jessie rubbed his back and kissed his neck. His last conscious thought was that a man couldn't ask for much more than this and somehow, some way he had to make Jessie change her mind about marrying him.

  ****

  "Nothing has changed," Jessie said, lying in the darkness of her room, with Cameron beside her in bed. "I'm still not marrying you."

  Cameron slammed his fist on top of the sheets. "For crying out loud, Jess. How can you say that after what we just shared?"

  Jessie shot up out of bed, grabbed a robe and hauled it on, all the while conscious of Cameron's frowning eyes upon her. She smoothed back her hair and turned to face the angry man in her bed. Naked. Still. Unconcerned with his lack of clothes. Looking incredibly sexy amidst the rumpled sheets.

  "I told you I can't have babies. I can't live knowing I'm denying you something you want."

  Cameron rose out of bed and stood before her, hands on hips. "You are denying me something I want. Very badly. More than I want kids."

  "What are you talking about?"

  "I want you, Jess. I want to marry you, share my life with you. I want to make lo
ve to you every night and wake up each morning with you by my side. How can you live with knowing how much I want you and not having you? You're denying both of us something we want desperately."

  Jessie shook her head. "I just can't. You don't understand."

  "No, I don't understand." Cameron dragged on his boxers, then his slacks. "Before you throw both our futures away, why don't you have a fertility test just to make sure? We've been having unprotected sex for months, and you might be carrying my child even now."

  "I'm not," she said. "I can't be. I'm barren, I tell you. We've been intimate since last October, and I haven't missed a period in all that time. Sure, they've been irregular, but they've always been that way. And that's probably too much information, but you asked. Face it, Cameron. I faced it a long time ago. I'll never be able to have children. I'm sorry."

  Cameron strode toward her and glared down at her. "You are one stubborn woman. You know that?"

  "I think you should leave."

  He pulled on his shirt and hastily buttoned it up. "Oh, I'm leaving all right. But this isn't over, sweetheart. Not by a long shot."

  He swiped his tie from the floor and flung it around his neck, his blue eyes spitting fire. "Don't bother showing me the door. I know the way. Good bye, Jess."

  Chapter Twelve

  The days following the council meeting proved to be extremely difficult. Jessie forced herself to go to work, but she didn't get much done. She was horrified that she'd made love with Cameron knowing she wasn't going to marry him or have any kind of relationship with him. She knew she was weak where he was concerned, but she should have stood firm and sent him on his way instead of falling into bed with him.

  Her heart felt heavy and she was depressed. On top of all that, her tummy started acting up at the end of the week and she hoped she wasn't coming down with the flu that was going around town. At noon on Friday, Sam sent her home.

  "You need to go to bed, Jessie. You look awful."

  "Gee, thanks. Just what a girl wants to hear."

  Sam wiped his hands on a grease rag. "I don't think you want to hear what I really have a mind to say. You need to take better care of yourself. Go home, Jess. I'll take care of things here."