by P. Jameson
She stared at him with wide, desperate eyes. “I can’t get the smell of him off. It’s everywhere.”
Oh, damn. Cael’s heart hurt.
“He marked you,” he reminded her, his throat thick. “A long time ago.”
“I know. I know. But I want it off. I need him off of me. Now.” Her voice rose until it shrieked, bouncing off the walls of the stall. She continued scouring her body while the scalding water streamed down.
“Isabesh. Stop.” His alpha dominance came forward but she didn’t submit.
“I have to get it off,” she whispered. “There must be a way. There must.”
Cael could think of only one, but it would be horrible for her. Then again, what was worse? Living with her abuser’s scent in her skin or… the alternative.
He swallowed the knot in his throat. He wasn’t ready for this. He was too angry. Too bitter. Old wounds had been ripped open and the pain was too fresh.
But he knew what she needed right now.
Before he had the chance to explain, Isabesh’s head snapped up, her watery hopeless gaze leveled on him. “You,” she said, defeated. “You can take it away.”
He stared hard at the woman who’d once been his hope, then became his condemnation, and now, would be his hell. Naked, on the tiled floor, asking for his help on a level that had everything to do with animal instinct and absolutely nothing to do with emotion.
She needed him to take her, let his animal imprint on her, purify her of her mate’s claim. The way only a wolf could.
Not as a lover; as an alpha.
Cael burst to his feet, pacing the small room, fists clenching. He would do this. And it would be as much for him as it was for her. Removing that fucker’s imprint would do them both a world of good.
But he didn’t want to hurt her. He didn’t know what sort of damage Jax had inflicted.
Was this the right thing?
“Cael.” Her voice shook uncontrollably. “Please. I know I don’t deserve it, after everything, but if you wanted me to suffer, surely you would have just left me there.”
His chest grew tight, making breathing nearly impossible. She needed an alpha. A noble one, who wouldn’t hurt her, reduce her to a shell of a person.
“Do this one thing for me, please, then take your revenge later.” Her frail request was more than he could stand. She wasn’t his wolf yet, no oath had been taken. But no alpha worth his fucking salt would let a wounded shifter suffer.
He had the power to free her fully, and he’d do it. God help him, he’d do it. And they’d both pay the consequences later.
Chapter Five
“Get up,” Cael murmured, holding his hand out for her. His wolf hesitated only a fraction, knowing what they were about to do was forbidden now that he’d found his intended. But Avan had already relinquished any rights.
Slowly, Isabesh uncurled from her spot near the drain. Cael dragged his eyes over her body. Her once strong arms were thin and speckled with bruises. Around her neck was a thin red ring. Probably the result of being choked with something.
That spineless motherfucker.
He let his anger flare to the surface. If he focused it on the one who deserved it the most, it would make this easier.
Isabesh’s fingers brushed his palm and he closed his hand around hers, pulling her from the shower. Grabbing a towel from the shelf, he used it to carefully dry her long blond hair. It was one of his favorite things about her. It had always been soft and thick.
He recalled making love to her on a blanket by the lake when they were young and hopeful. She’d confessed the horrors of her home and all he’d wanted to do was take her away. He promised her she wouldn’t have to do anything she didn’t want to ever again. When they were both sated, she’d lain with her head on his chest, that hair strung everywhere like threads of silk cocooning them.
He hadn’t been able to look twice at a woman with blonde hair since. He’d taken only brunettes or, on occasion, a red-head when he needed his physical needs met. Which was very rare, since his emotional needs were wound so tightly with the physical.
She watched him in the mirror as he ran the towel down her back and arms taking water droplets with it. He tossed it to the corner. Taking a deep breath, he peeled his shirt off, adding it to the pile.
Looking down, he took in the shape of her body, the way it curved in and then back out at the waist. It was exactly how he remembered it, though a bit slighter, and marked from years of mistreatment.
Cael shook his head. How could her mate have done this? Didn’t his wolf rebel at the action? Their animals were inherently born to protect, only harming those who threatened what belonged to them. How did Jax become the threat instead of the protector?
With his hands, he grazed the skin of her back. A breath of air rushed from her lungs, her sides heaving at his barely-there touch. He smoothed his hands up and over her shoulders. His scent needed to be everywhere, and this is how they’d start. Skin on skin contact. Following the line of her arms until he reached her hands, he twined his fingers with hers, bringing them to rest on her belly.
She trembled, her breath catching.
“I’m angry,” he seethed. “So fucking angry. At you, at him. But I would never hurt you. Could never…”
A sob escaped her throat followed by a jagged inhale.
His wolf bucked inside, confused, scenting Jax’s mark and Isabesh’s heat. The heat called to him, the mark warned him away. He’d fix both of those things.
He flattened his palm, rubbing gentle circles over her stomach. She had to accept him mentally as well as physically in order for this to work the way she wanted it to. Over and over, he passed his hands along the skin there, imprinting as much of his scent as possible. He moved to her ribs and arms, repeating the motion before pressing her back against his chest. Her chilled, dewy skin against his hot made his throat ache with want.
Meeting her gaze in the mirror, he realized just how tortured he was. Secretly, and without even realizing it, he’d wished for this to happen, this union, this opportunity to make Isabesh his again. Killing Jax had only ever been part of the plan. He’d been a fool for ever thinking that would be enough.
The green of her eyes mixing with sadness and hope anchored him, focused him.
His hand slipped around her throat, fingers brushing over the angry red line there. With his thumb, he caressed her jaw, slowly, never taking his eyes off their reflection.
“I need to touch every inch of you,” he whispered. “The more of me on your skin, the better.” He was asking permission. Everything from here on out had to be her choice.
She understood, giving a nod.
His other hand trailed slowly upward, stroking just under her heaving breast. Then he palmed it, carefully, gently, holding his breath as her nipple hardened against his grip. He squeezed, letting his thumb brush the tight bud.
Cael’s heart went from steady to racing when her scent changed from one of fear and desperation to something heavy and luxurious. Her heat was thick, but this was something more. He was bringing her pleasure with the simplest touch.
He shouldn’t be doling out pleasure. He should be punishing. But she’d had so much of that already, and the tears streaming down her cheeks to land on the hand at her jaw told him this pleasure was also breaking her.
He spread his hand over her other breast before moving down her front, lower and lower. He hesitated just above her cleft. If he touched her there this would be game over. He had to mark the rest of her first.
He released her throat, stepping back just enough to squat behind her. Starting at her ankles, he slowly swept his hands along her lithe legs. He was growing hungry for her, and with her scent so close to his face, it was impossible not to want to lick.
At her thigh, Cael noticed a drip, and it wasn’t a drop of water he’d missed with the towel. For the first time since their reunion, he let his eyes land on the crevice between her legs. She was swollen from her heat, and glistening
.
Cael swallowed to stem a growl. Fuck.
He dipped his head, catching the drip on her thigh and tasting her sweetness once again. So fucking long. It’d been so long. Cael shivered to his toes.
That fucker’d had this, had what was his.
He stared at her entrance, grinding his teeth to keep control. He wanted to bury his face there forever. Lick away every drop of arousal. Mark that area with his tongue.
She was trying to keep still. He could tell by the way she trembled. But she was needy. And that was too fucking bad.
Somehow, he managed to move his hands to her ass without touching the spot that called to him. Her whimper gave him so much satisfaction. He massaged her cheeks before running a finger lightly along her crack, earning him another small moan.
Cael stood. His pants had to go. He was harder than he’d ever been. He made quick work of his belt and shoes, all the while holding her gaze in the mirror. Her eyes were half mast but still held a hint of fear. His pants joined the towel in the corner.
They were completely bare now. There was no stopping this. She’d be his again. Maybe not her heart, but certainly her body. And after this, he’d never ask her for it again. So technically, she’d be free. He wouldn’t collar her like Jax had.
Stepping close, his erection brushed her thighs and she faltered, catching herself on the counter.
“Is this something that frightens you?”
She shook her head. “No, but…” Her teeth came down on her bottom lip, stopping the rest.
Cael frowned. “But what?”
She shook her head, looking away. Cael pulled her back to standing and slowly, carefully resumed his grip on her throat. There was no pressure, just his thumb stroking the soft column to calm her.
“But what?” he asked again.
She blinked once and when her eyes opened, they were full of guilt and misery. “Jax only ever took me from behind.”
Like a bitch; never like a woman.
Part of him was glad. Jax didn’t deserve having her body pressed against his, face to face, intimately. But his treatment had left terrible memories. And for that, Cael’s wolf raged. He’d travel to hell just to kill him again, if it was possible.
He lowered his mouth to whisper directly into her ear. “Then I will take you from behind now, and give you a better memory.” His lips brushed the skin under her ear and she relaxed against him.
He gathered her hair in one fist, pulling her head to the side revealing the mating mark at the curve of her shoulder. His eyes narrowed on it and a growl burst from his throat causing Isabesh to jump.
“I’m going to bite a new mark, Isa. Right through this one, and you won’t have to think about his ever again.” He hadn’t planned on that part of it, but now, he realized it was necessary. He wouldn’t leave any part of that monster on her body.
He draped her hair over one delicate shoulder, his eye catching on the way it covered one beautiful breast. His gaze went to her darkened eyes.
“Is your wolf fighting?” He had to know. If her animal was resisting, he didn’t know how he’d handle it.
“She wants you more than I do.”
Cael broke away from the mirror to look at her actual face. Though he only got her profile, he could see how much that admission cost her.
Enough talking.
He dragged his hand down the length of her back, noticing the chill bumps that rose to greet his touch. He used his nails to lightly scratch a trail. Moving past her ass, he kept going, finally touching the place he’d dreamed about for too long.
He reached between her legs, feeling her wetness coat his fingers and hearing her sharp gasp, but he didn’t stop there. He found the swollen bundle that would give her the most intense pleasure and circled it with the tip of his finger.
Isabesh spasmed at the first touch, her hands flying up to grip the forearm of the hand around her neck.
“Cael, you don’t need to—”
“I need to.”
He pressed harder, circled faster. She wouldn’t take this away from him.
A sound erupted from her throat, a cross between a moan and a sob. He wished they were in a position where he could kiss that sound away. Devour it. Instead, he settled for pressing his lips to the flushed skin of her neck.
He continued with the gentle touches but she was having trouble letting go.
“When was the last time you came, Isa?”
She shook her head, denying him an answer. And though it seemed important, there were other pressing matters.
“I’ll get the answer from you later. You can bet on that. But right now, I want your orgasm.” She stiffened, her nails digging into his arm in the most delicious way. “Come for me,” he whispered.
He’d accept nothing less.
She went completely still, her mouth open on a gasp…
And then she soared, flying high without ever leaving his arms.
***
Isabesh sailed higher than she ever had, floating on regrets and failures, but somehow they were being rewritten. Cael was the new author. She’d never be able to thank him enough for what he was doing. She’d never be able to make things right. But he knew that, and didn’t care. He was willing to help her anyway.
In that moment, she loved him more than was within the realm of possibility. No matter what revenge he had in store for her later, she’d take it gladly. She’d do her time. Anything to make things easier for this man who had every right to be angry, yet treated her so gently.
He breathed heavily against her neck, his heat washing over her, warming her inside as much as outside. He pulled his hand from between her legs and his hardness jutted against her backside. She flinched. A knee-jerk reaction.
“Shh,” he murmured, his thumb still caressing the side of her throat. “Get used to the way it feels. See? Heavy. Hard. But never dangerous.”
Her animal stood firm, giving Besh a shot of strength. They needed Jax’s scent gone. Besh had to move forward or she’d get stuck in the past. The wicked, wicked past that followed her incessantly throughout life. No matter how fast or hard she ran, it was never far behind.
“I need you to bend. Just a little.” His voice was tight.
She leaned forward bracing herself on the counter, trying desperately not to hate this position. Cael’s hand slipped from her throat, smoothing a path down her back until she felt his strong grip on her hip. She throbbed between her legs, both fearful and hungry for him. Her wolf whined, needy and aching from the heat.
“Feel me?” He stroked his erection sensuously between her folds, drawing another moan. “Not dangerous. Now, look in the mirror.”
She lifted her gaze to their reflection as he slowly pressed in. She felt him shake and tremble, and when she met his eyes, they were pain-filled, brows drawn low. Her choices had hurt him deeply. Even this one, right now. She wished she could stop. Stop hurting the ones she loved.
He quit moving when he was buried fully inside her. Besh took a deep breath, relaxing to accept his size. Her wolf wanted her to move, to satisfy the heat, but Besh couldn’t bring herself to do it.
He gripped her shoulder, his muscles flexing with the movement, and pulled her back to standing. At this angle, his length inside her felt substantial, and deep. He wrapped one arm solidly around her waist while the other one returned to her throat. Tilting her head to the side, he buried his face against her neck. His hair fell forward, hiding his eyes.
And then he moved. The slowest, most exorable retreat, followed by an equally measured thrust. It made her weak in the knees and numb with pleasure from her head to her toes. Exquisite.
It was better than she remembered, feeling him inside her. But familiar in so many ways. With what her mother had forced her into, she’d taken many men into her body. When she met Cael, he hadn’t wanted anything from her. Just her love. And once she’d given him that, they’d proclaimed their feelings for each other using their bodies. That was when Besh realized there was
a difference between being fucked and being loved.
Cael was the only man who’d ever loved her.
And even now, with all the hurt between them, with their feelings scrapped and scarred, with the future in an infinite tangle of woe… he could still love her.
“Your scent is already changing,” he whispered, his lips brushing against her skin.
“Yes.” Her breathless reply had him increasing his speed.
Cael’s palm flattened on her belly, pressing in while he moved. The sensation was magic, ripping a groan from her throat.
More. She wanted more. She wanted him to brand her as his, give her his young, and screw the consequences. She wanted to close the book on Jax and intended matings and her mother and Ozarka and never open it again.
The pressure on her belly combined with his urgent thrusting almost tossed her over the edge for the second time.
“Are you ready for my bite, Isa?”
“Please,” she moaned. “Please.”
“You’ll be mine.” He thrust hard, his voice taking on a crazed edge that should have scared her. But all she could feel was relief. “No one will ever take you from me again.” His fingers dug into the skin of her neck, but not enough to hurt. Even as a dominant alpha, he wouldn’t harm her. The thought left her reeling.
His hand slid down to cup her heat as he continued his steady thrusting. His lips swept back and forth along the curve of her neck where he’d bite. He licked. Sucked. Stroked between her legs.
And then bit.
Besh gasped at the slice of pain. But it got even worse. His jaw released her and viciously bit again, this time latching on for good. She went limp, unable to fight him at all, and not wanting to in the least. His hand and cock kept a rhythm between her legs and when she came this time, it was a new and different experience.
Ink blotting out everything she knew. Every feeling, every sin, every joy.
New words being written in her skin. New feelings, new memories, new mistakes to be made.
With Cael, the author of her story. Her future.
He growled, snarling against her neck as he came. His release burned inside her, yet cooled the heat. Soothed her inside. Soothed her soul. Soothed her wolf. A balm for the years of aching loss.
