The Monroe Series Complete Trilogy

by Emma Tharp

  Giselle showed me what's possible. And now, I need to make sure she can see what I'm capable of, what I've accomplished. All of this is because of her, and for her. She has to know, so I reach out and pitch her firm a team-building vacation. The partners love it. To make sure she doesn't realize it's me, I don't use the name she calls me, Dean, which is actually my middle name. I was named after my father and to keep the confusion at family meals to a minimum, I’ve always been known by it. I didn’t lie. It just never came up. My business name is Jeremy D. Randall. And the weekend after Labor Day, we're going to meet again in Scottsdale, Arizona.

  Nineteen

  Giselle

  For the last two months I've been trudging along, doing what I always do. Work, work, and more work. But I miss Dean. Terribly. And I hate the way things ended between us. So, I've put my head down and have been working twice as hard. It's what I know how to do. Karen has been helping me by bringing me out on the weekends and filling up my spare time with things to do besides dwell on how sad I've been.

  Donovan and Liza invited me out for dinner. It was good to see them, but it was hard, too. It hurt seeing how close they are and the amount of love they have for each other. Normally, public displays of affection don’t bother me, but this time, it stung. They could sense that I was off and got it out of me that I left my weeklong trip early and it didn’t end well. They both thought that I should reach out to him and talk it through. I told them that I did try to reach out, but he hasn’t returned my call. I damaged us beyond repair and I have only myself to blame.

  At least now I've got something to look forward to. The firm received a pitch from Snow & Sun Tours for a team-building exercise. I am fully on board and looking forward to it. Hell, after my last disastrous vacation, I'm determined to have a positive and memorable experience. This sounds like it's going to fit the bill perfectly, plus the firm is paying for it. Everyone is going to be there. To keep the firm running like a well-oiled machine, we need everyone working together. There have been minor issues lately and this promises to help us work through them, grow together, and find common ground. It sounds ideal.

  As I packed my bags this morning, it was difficult not to relive some of the painful memories of the last time I used my luggage. I've gone over my last day with Dean in my head and I'm crushed every time I see the look on Dean's face. He told me he loved me and I didn't allow myself to be vulnerable with him. Instead, I left him. There's still a small ache in my chest, but I can't think about that now. It isn't productive.

  On impulse, I call my travel agent on my way to the airport and book a flight to Vermont for when I return from Scottsdale. I’m going to go see Dean in person. I need to do more to try and win him back. And if he still won’t have me, at least I tried. A sense of peace comes over me as I park my car and grab my luggage.

  The firm fills an entire plane. Karen sits next to me on the flight. She puts on an eye mask and sleeps the entire time. I wish I could rest that soundly on a plane. Instead, I read a self-help book about intimacy. It's enlightening since I'm not naturally in tune with my own feelings or those of others. I've been trying to read a few minutes before bed every night. Liza gave me this book and said she thought I'd enjoy it. So far, I have. Initially, I thought that this might be Donovan's way of trying to push me into finding a relationship, but that's not the vibe I'm getting from the book. It’s cluing me in on how I can better understand myself, and how I seem to be getting in my own way when it comes to relationships.

  The plane touches down in Scottsdale when I’m on the chapter about vulnerability. This would’ve come in handy a couple of months ago. I tuck the book away in my purse, and give Karen a nudge to tell her it's time to wake up. "I can't believe you slept through the landing."

  She stretches her arms over her head and pulls her eye mask up so it rests on her forehead. "I guess I really needed the rest. This is going to be a great trip. I can feel it."

  "I think so, too."

  We stand and file out of the plane. Then, we’re informed that our baggage will be loaded onto the bus that will transport us to the resort, and that we should make our way outside to wait.

  I take a deep breath of the warm Arizona air and admire the palm trees and mountains off in the distance.

  My heart stops and mouth is instantly dry as a bone when I see Dean standing near the buses. Just like every first time I see him, everything else falls away. The beautiful landscape behind him blurs into nothing. My pulse quickens and my legs move me in his direction before I have a chance to think. "Dean?"

  He glances up from his clipboard and gets a beautiful, white-toothed smile on his face. "Giselle. Good to see you." He points at his name tag. Jeremy.

  I swallow hard. When I saw the name of the owner, I didn’t think twice that the guy had Dean’s last name. "You're the owner of Snow & Sun Tours?"

  He nods and somehow his smile widens. "Sure am." He shrugs his shoulders as if this isn't a big deal, but it’s huge. My chest fills with pride for him. "Is this your first tour?" I want to know everything.

  He takes a breath and looks back and forth between the buses and all of the luggage. "Babe, I'm a little busy right now. What if we talk later over wine by the fire at the pool?"

  Glancing around, I realize he's the only one keeping this from being a purely chaotic situation. My cheeks feel warm and I nod before I hop on the bus. I choose a seat near the window so I can stare down at him. I can't help but admire everything about him. He's tan and his body is fit, as always. And he looks official in khakis and a blue polo shirt with the Snow & Sun Tours logo on it. His shoulders are back and he seems calm. There's something about him. He's more than he was before. And even then…he was enough.

  "Is that your friend?” my senior partner in the firm, James, asks as he sinks down in the seat beside me. "I thought you told me he's a ski instructor."

  I nod, still in awe of Dean or Jeremy or whatever his name is. "He was. Now…I don't know." I shrug, but I can't take my eyes off him.

  The ride to the resort is twenty minutes and I pretend to sleep so James won't try to talk to me about Dean. I don't even know what I would say. I'm so confused, but I can't stop thinking about him. When we get to the resort, our bags are taken to our rooms and we are briefed by Dean and given our itineraries.

  In forty-five minutes, happy hour begins by the pool with hors d'oeuvres.

  I make my way to my room in a haze and when I open my door, disappointment crushes me to see that I'm by myself. I secretly hoped that Dean would want to share the room with me. Of course, had he done anything that presumptuous, I probably would've been mad. Now, I face the reality of my longing.

  I miss him.

  I love him, still. Even though I never wanted to call it that, clearly that's what this is. My heart wouldn’t hurt this much if my feelings were anything less than love. And before, I'd never been able to see how he could fit into my world. That is, until my talk with Garrett. I thought I had it all worked out. I was going to explain it to Dean, but he never gave me the chance. Not that I blame him.

  Adding some extra curls to my hair and lipstick to my lips, I spend more time than normal getting myself ready. I hadn't planned on seeing Dean, but I'm glad I brought this cocktail dress with me. I hope he loves it.

  Somehow, I survive happy hour and our first team-building exercise around the pool. Karen tries to make normal conversation, but I'm too distracted by Dean's presence. She asks if I’m okay. I simply wave her off and tell her it’s jetlag. It’s an excuse. The real reason I can’t focus is because I'm always looking for Dean, and when he makes eye contact with me, butterflies flutter to life in my belly.

  We are reminded that group yoga is at eight in the morning before it gets too hot, and then, everyone is dismissed. Some people stay to mingle, others turn in. Karen is talking to Jay from accounting—she’s always been smitten with him. Me, I find my way to the fireplace by the pool where Dean has reserved a loveseat and set up wine and food on
a cocktail table.

  He’s standing, staring into the fire when I make my way over to him. He's so damn handsome. My pulse speeds up when I’m finally standing next to him. "Dean?"

  Slowly, he turns and passes me a drink. "Hello, Giselle."

  His voice is cordial, but there's something tense about his shoulders, arms, and face. I can feel it like a fist squeezing my heart. I did this to him. Now he has a need to protect himself in case nothing has changed between us.

  What if he can’t forgive me for leaving him? What if he’s changed his mind about me? A jolt of fear and apprehension course through me. All I want to do is throw myself in his arms, same as always, but I don’t. "What have you done?" I ask, my admiration obvious.

  There's a glimmer in his teal eyes and he takes a step closer to me. I can smell his bodywash, light and manly, and it makes my mouth water. “I did it for us, baby. I did it because I needed to find a way to fit into your life. If you still don’t want me, I have a big beautiful business to fall back on."

  I nod and release the breath I was holding. "Let's go talk in my room."

  Twenty

  Dean

  She wants me. Every cell in my body feels it. I swallow down a wave of excitement and do my best to keep calm.

  Everything I've been working so hard for and all I've ever wanted is standing in front of me. I have to make the most of this.

  "Sure," I say as I pick up the wine. She gets the food and we make our way to her suite.

  “Is your name Dean or Jeremy?” she asks.

  I give her a smirk. “My full name is Jeremy Dean Randall. But ever since I was a kid, my family has called me Dean, since my dad’s name is also Jeremy. It was easier this way. But for official business, I use my given name.”

  "Ah. I see. Tell me about the business," she urges.

  There's a gleam in her eyes and with it I feel taller, and stronger somehow. I get the sense that this is her idea of pillow talk. Seeing me confident and successful makes her want me more than normal. I’m not put off by this because I understand Giselle and how her brain works. She was brought up believing that success is security and that trumps everything else. I want her to know that I can take care of her, that I’ve got her back. And I think I’ve shown her. The excitement she’s feeling is completely mutual.

  One thing is for sure; I need to talk fast because soon, I won't be able to talk at all. I’ve missed her too much. "So, after you left…"

  "Sorry about that," she says, a frown on her face.

  "Let's not worry about that now.”

  “I tried calling you to work it out. I even booked a flight to come see you after this. And I had pages upon pages written down that I worked on, making a case for our relationship.” There’s real passion in her tone and I believe her.

  “Giselle. I love that you did.” It warms my heart that she went to work for us to figure things out. “But, I decided to build the business, find my passion, and make it work. I needed more money to give you a sense of security. And I want to help you find more time to relax and unwind. And I needed to prove to myself that I could do it. It took all of my focus. That’s why I couldn’t answer your call. I hope that makes sense to you."

  We get to her room and she pauses as she unlocks her door. "It does. And this is the perfect business for you."

  We enter her room and I can't keep the dumb grin off my face. "I only planned on running one tour a month, but this kind of exploded. This is my fourth tour." I shrug because I honestly could never have dreamed that it would take off as quickly as it has.

  Her dark eyes go wide, but not in disbelief. No, I've impressed her, and somehow, I feel as if my lungs can expand fuller and I can breathe with deeper, more satisfying breaths. "In two months?"

  I nod. "Yeah."

  The next thing I know, she is racing toward me, pressing her lips to mine. I pull her body to me, running my hands up and down her back. When her tongue strokes mine, my heart pounds hard against my ribs like she’s resuscitating me—as if it hasn’t been beating since she left me. My fingers grip the cool fabric of her dress and pull her flush against me, letting her feel how much I want this. She lets out a soft moan and from that sweet sound, I know she feels the same. This kiss was testing the attraction that clearly never went away. It's also a reconnection, but now it feels deeper than it ever has before.

  She lifts the hem of my shirt and rips it off, over my head, breaking the kiss. It gives me a moment of clarity. Even though I want her more than I’ve ever wanted anything else in my life, I take the time to ask the question that's burning in my brain. "At the risk of pushing it, I need to know: is this going to be a one-time thing?" My breath is ragged when I release her and take a step back, desperate to know the answer. If she only wants me this once, I don’t know if I can put myself through the pain of having her again only to lose her.

  She shakes her head and presses her body to mine once again, laying her hands on my chest. "No. I don't want this to be a one-time thing. I'm hoping we can make this long-term." She kisses my cheek. "Tell me more. Are you still a ski instructor?" She's biting her lip and I can see in her eyes that she's trying to make some important decisions.

  "I don’t know. Now, that's not to say that I won't run ski trips. I have one planned for Aspen in November." I'm not sure with this new career of mine if I'm going to have time to teach others how to ski, but that doesn't mean I won't be skiing.

  "And what are you doing for Thanksgiving?” she asks.

  I cup her face with my hands. "I was hoping to go somewhere special with you."

  “A working vacation?" she asks.

  We still have some work to do. "If you want. Or it can just be us. I can afford it now."

  She stands up on her tiptoes so we’re almost looking eye-to-eye. "Move in with me?” she asks in almost a whisper.

  I can't help it, but I laugh. She has to be joking. But by the look in her eye, I realize she's serious. "Did you just tell me you love me?" I tease.

  She drags her teeth along her bottom lip. "I think I did." She takes a long deep breath. "Because I know I do."

  “Are you sure?” I ask.

  The smile she was wearing falters for a moment. “Positive. In fact, I’ve been toying with the idea of moving to Vermont. Opening up my own firm.”

  My heart races so fast I feel like I just got off my mountain bike. I pull her in and kiss her lips.

  "Please talk before I do something crazy like…ask you to marry me or something," she stammers.

  Now I know she's kidding and I chuckle. "That's my job. Look who's pushing now?"

  A pink blush creeps across Giselle's cheeks. She’s so damn beautiful. "I've missed you. And you're making me believe we can actually make this work. I haven't dated anyone but you since July."

  I look at her curiously.

  "Before that, too. It has been just you for a long time, with the occasional hiccup." She collapses against my chest. "No one could ever touch you. That's what I found out. I'd accepted I was going to be single for life. And I’m sorry that I was so damn rigid and unwavering with you. My brothers always tell me that I’m too stubborn and set in my ways, like our father was. When I thought I’d lost you forever, I realized that I needed to change for you, too.”

  I grab her chin so she's looking at me. Every word she's telling me has my heart beating at an unsteady rhythm, and my throat is growing thick. She's telling me everything I want to hear. Her hands are shaking, but her posture is open. This is it. What I've been waiting for. "It doesn’t matter where we live. I love you and want to be with you, too."

  Her eyes fill with tears and her lower lip quivers. I close the distance between us and brush my lips against hers. "I want all of you, if you’ll have me."

  "Only if you’ll have all of me,” I tell her.

  We move to the bed and lie next to each other. I plan to show her just how much I love her and how excited I am for our future together.

  Epilogue

  Gisel
le

  Four Years Later

  "Can you hand me the big pink shovel?" Leah, my four-year-old niece, asks.

  "Of course," I say, handing her the tool.

  Camille taps the top of her pail and slowly slides it up over the sand. "I think this is the biggest castle we've ever made, baby." She looks adoringly at her daughter.

  "I think so, too." Leah stands and takes off with the pail to fill it with water.

  Just then, a wailing cry comes through the baby monitor sitting on the lounge chair next to Liza. "Donovan, can you go get Rory?" she asks. It appears their seven-month-old son woke up from his nap.

  Donovan gets up off his chair and sets down his beer. He walks over to us and kisses Liza on the top of her head. "I'll go grab him and feed him a bottle."

  "Thanks, hon. This sandcastle is serious business." Liza winks at him as he walks away.

  It really is impressive. The ladies have been working on it for the last hour.

  I love vacationing with my family on Monroe Cay. They are all special to me and it's been nice spending time with my niece and new nephew.

  "When is Dean flying in?" Camille asks as she applies a coat of sunscreen to Leah's shoulders.

  Looking down at my watch, my heart rate speeds up. "He should be here any minute." He's just finished a tour he had in Lake Tahoe.

  "Yay! I can't wait to see Uncle Dean," Leah announces, clapping her hands together.

  "I can't either." My heart warms hearing that my niece is so fond of my husband. He's a natural with children. And all of my family loves him.

  Three months after Dean and I were reunited in Scottsdale, he moved in with me in New York. We still own his house in Vermont and visit it regularly. I absolutely fell in love with Vermont. Who knew that I'd enjoy hiking, mountain biking, and snowshoeing as much as I do? Dean really rubbed off on me. And he taught me what it means to take time for myself. Now, I utilize all of my vacation time and I enjoy every minute of it.