"That close, huh?"
"Why?"
"I just wanted to spend a little more than two minutes with you. After all, I don't know when I'll ever get this chance again."
"Do you want this chance again?"
"Can't you tell?"
"I just wanna hear it from you," she said coyly.
I stole a quick glance as I drove. "I want this chance again."
She smiled, and I couldn't help but return the gesture, resting my hand on her thigh.
CHER
His hand felt warm against my jeans, but my skin begged for it to slide up a little further. My mother would have been so disappointed in how easily I'd been won over by a handsome face and a few smooth words. But deep down inside I knew there was more to him than what he appeared to be. He was familiar to me in a way I couldn't put my finger on.
He pulled into an empty parking spot and began to pull his hand away, but instinct kicked in, and I laid my hand on his, holding it on my thigh. I wasn't ready for our time to be over. He squeezed my flesh between his strong fingers, and leaned over, pressing his other palm against my right cheek, shifting my face toward his.
I hooked my fingers onto his wrist, closing my eyes to enjoy his skin against mine.
"Can I kiss you?" he leaned in and exhaled into my ear.
"Would it end at a kiss?"
"Would you want it to?"
I shook my head slightly.
"It can end where you want it to."
"What if I don't want it to?" I asked, still engulfed in the passion billowing around us. "To end, I mean."
"I've never been prepared to offer more than a few hours, a night perhaps. But with you, Cher, I want—I need—" He pulled his hand away and sat back in his seat.
"What's wrong?"
"I'm your professor. What runs through my mind when I think of you is wrong. The things I want to do to you—to say to you. All of it. They're all wrong."
Here we go. Exactly what my mother warned me about. He had one foot out the door even before anything happened, and I wasn't going to let him have the last word.
"This isn't Romeo and Juliet, and I've been foolish to let myself think I could find someone who wouldn't leave at the first sign of trouble. And you're right; you are my teacher, and this is wrong. So, if you'll excuse—"
"Stay."
There it was again. That word. That panty-wetting word.
I snapped at him, "I'm not your pet."
"I didn't say you were, Cher. I just wanna make sure we're both ready to accept the consequences of breaking down the walls we've built around ourselves. And if you want me as much as I want you, you will have to let me in." His eyes were honest in the deliverance of his words, and I had nothing profound to offer in return.
I was scared. I'd never felt like this before, and I wasn't prepared to blindly take a leap for love—no matter how much I ached for him.
"I'm sorry. I just can't." I pulled my wrist away and grabbed onto the door handle.
His fingers trailed down my spine as I stepped out of the car. Our connection was so intense I knew what he wanted to say without him speaking a word of it.
I closed the door behind me just in time to hide the tears welling in my eyes. "I'm sorry."
But sorry couldn't describe the loss I felt in the pit of my stomach as I walked away from the car.
TEACH ME
REGAN
Say something to her.
Of all the years of studying poetry and literature, I couldn't for the life of me come up with anything to make her stay. She had her mind set on leaving, and I wasn't enough.
I watched her disappear into the building in front of me, taking with her everything I'd offered up so quickly to a woman I barely knew.
I turned the car on and prepared to back out of the space when I realized this was it. If I left now, I'd never know if she was the one. My father wouldn't have given up on my mother like that. He was a man of courage and conviction—everything I strived to be ever since the day my mother began to tell me stories of him. He would have put up a fight, and so would I.
I shut off the engine and jumped out of the car, despite not knowing which room was hers. It wasn't like I could knock on every door asking for her, but I refused to let her have the last word.
I made it through the entrance and caught sight of a door closing, followed by the sound of a deadbolt locking. That had to be her. Slowly, I made my way down the hall, walking with my head down, hoping I didn't run into any of my students.
I found myself standing in front of the door too nervous to knock.
I held up a closed fist, ready to take a leap of faith when a soft voice whispered from behind, "What are you doing?"
I spun around to Cher, leaning against her doorframe. Her arms were crossed, and her face was flush from crying. I stood there for a moment, contemplating my next move, wondering if I had the strength to keep my hands to myself. But all I could think of was tasting her one last time. She wasn't going to walk away from me again. Not tonight. Not ever. I took two purposeful steps forward, smashing my lips against hers as I wrapped my arms around her waist, and lifted her from the floor.
She wrapped her legs around my hips as she ran her fingers through my hair, grabbing a fistful as I walked us through the threshold of the door, slamming it shut behind me. I kissed her with all the passion I'd been holding back from all the fruitless relationships I'd had in my life.
I pressed her up against the wall, pinning her body against mine. My lips traced up her cheek, to the shell of her ear and down the side of her neck. She let out a slight moan the moment I raked my teeth across her velvety, smooth skin.
I would be lying if I said I didn't feel honored to be the first one to touch her this way—to feel every soft inch of her—but, moreover, I was excited that it would be my first time caring for the woman I would be lying next to in the morning.
I grabbed her wrists and held them above her head with my right hand, as my left trailed down her arm, sliding underneath the edge of her shirt to cup my palm against her breast.
I broke our kiss. "Are you sure, Cher?"
CHER
I wasn't sure, but I was willing to try—I was willing to try with him. Everything about our circumstances couldn't be more wrong, but I was tired of trying to push him away when everything in me begged to pull him close. I was hooked. The moment he touched me—I was hooked.
REGAN
She pulled her wrists from my grasp, and clutched onto the hem of her tank top, pulling it over her head, letting the jersey material fall to the floor. I kissed the peak of her shoulder as I unhooked her bra and slid it off, revealing her round, supple breasts to me—to anyone—for the very first time.
She was beautiful, and untouched. Wrapping my arms around her hips, I carried her to the bed, gently laying her on her back. I brushed my fingers over a few strands of hair that fell about her face, adoring the innocence I was about to take as mine. I unbuttoned her pants and slid them off. Seeing her small, black panties, fringed with lace, sent me into a veritable craze inside.
How could I be gentle with her when her body begged to be ravaged. and I was in a position to oblige.
"Will you hate me tomorrow?" I asked, laying my whole weight on top of her.
"Will you?" She searched my eyes for truth.
"I could never hate you, Cher," I replied, grazing my lips over hers.
"You don't even know me."
"And you don't know me."
"But I'm broken—in so many places," she said with a crack in her voice.
"Give me the chance to help put you back together." The words spilled out as I reveled in her presence.
I was offering things of myself that, just the other day, would have been unfathomable. She clutched onto the back of my shirt, pulling it up and over my head, letting our skin touch for the first time in the most intimate way.
"Tell me you want what you see," she whispered. "That I'm enough for you."
The sadness in her words hurt my heart. "How could you not be enough for any man, let alone me?"
"I wasn't enough to keep my father around."
"I'm not him, Cher. I'd never leave unless you asked me to."
A tear cascaded from her eye and down her temple, dripping onto the soft, white sheets.
"I'm scared to let you in."
"Let me teach you to trust," I said, wiping the wetness from her face.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me close. "Then teach me."
I slid a hand under the nape of her neck, giving it a small squeeze, acknowledging her trust. I trailed my fingers down her back and around her slender hip, hooking my finger under the edge of her panties.
CHER
Our eyes locked as I bit my lip in anticipation of what he was about to do. I could just imagine the care he would take sliding them off, but secretly I hoped he would relieve me of them in the most savage way.
His fingers brushed along the laced edges of my panties, taunting me with his experience, sliding them off without much effort on my part, or his.
I was completely bare while he was still dressed from the waist down. I felt a little out on my own, but when he leaned in to kiss me again, my insecurities fell away.
He raked his fingers up my thigh, slowly making his way between my crease, pleasuring me with sensations only nature could have designed. His skill was impressive, and I wanted more. I wanted him inside me. Unable to stand the anticipation any longer, I unbuttoned his pants and pushed them down as far as I could, maneuvering around his expert hands and soulful kisses, unleashing his hard cock.
In a different situation, maybe I could have waited for the main event and been satisfied with his tenderness, but my body was ready to explode with desire—a desire I could no longer cage.
He kissed my cheek. "We can take things slower if you want."
I bit my lip, tugging him toward me. "No."
He reached down into his pocket and pulled out a shiny gold square. Ripping the edge with his teeth, he pulled out the condom and rolled it on with one hand. He lined himself up with my throbbing core, sliding the massiveness he had been concealing inside his perfectly tailored jeans.
Wincing at the first pass, he paused, asking with his eyes if he should stop. I ran my fingers through his hair, taking a fistful in my palm, guiding his lips to mine, urging him to continue.
Slowly, he pulled out—leaving the tip—tempting and frustrating me.
"Don't play with me, Regan."
He smiled, effortlessly sliding himself back in, and with that, there wasn't any more me and him, or him and me—there was just us.
His rhythm was slow at first, I think more for my sake than his, but I didn't want gentle. I wanted more for my first time. I wanted him to ravage me—dominate me in ways I'd only imagined. I dug my nails into his back, coaxing a deep growl from his lungs and a harder thrust into my wet core.
REGAN
A whimper escaped from her lips as I slid in and out of her tight pussy. Sex had never felt like this before. This wasn't just sex for me. It was more. Cher was more.
I ran my fingers through her hair. "I've never wanted anyone as much I want you."
She dug her nails deeper into my back and exhaled into the cool air that hovered above us.
"Show me."
She wanted nothing to do with my gentle approach, and I was happy to remove the restraints and unleash the night's pent-up angst. I pulled out and pushed myself up onto my knees, scooping her up with one arm. I led her to straddle me, slipping her back down onto my hard dick, her walls clenching around me. I wrapped my fingers around her waist and squeezed, forcing myself to the hilt.
Her moans began to fill the room, encouraging me to work harder to please her. After all, it was her first time, and it was my duty to make it memorable. I loved how sexy she looked at that moment with her eyes closed, and her head tilted back, enjoying every goddam second I was fucking her.
Fuck! This woman has everything.
I continued to slam into her until I felt her body tightening as an orgasm crashed into her for the first time. Her lips parted, but nothing other than a slight whimper escaped. She melted against me as I kissed the crook of her neck, her body quivering as the aftershocks washed over her.
"Regan," she whispered.
The sound of my name rolling off her tongue, coupled with the sight of her cumming was my downfall. I guided her up off of me and flipped her over onto her stomach, spreading her knees apart. I hovered on top of her, sliding my hard cock back into her slick pussy. I kissed her cheek, twining my fingers with hers as I drove into her.
She exhaled hard as I hammered into her, but as my passes shallowed her breath slowed to match my pace. She was so fucking tight, and I didn't deserve any of the pleasure her body had to offer. A flash of heat seized my body and every thought I harbored of how wrong the affair was disappeared as I released everything I had into her. All I could see were the possibilities of the future she offered.
I thrust deeply into her one last time, laying claim to what was mine. "That's my good girl," I whispered, nipping at the shell of her ear.
Her pussy tightened around my dick, prolonging the tantalizing feeling I'd just experienced.
I kissed her cheek. "I'm going to love being in you like this every day."
Her eyes smiled. "Every day? What if you get tired of me?"
"Shhh. I could never get tired of my girl."
She gripped my fingers, smiling so sweetly.
Fuck, I could fall in love with you right now.
CHER
I felt the weight of his body pressed securely against mine, keeping me safe from everything I feared.
I could fall in love right now.
REALITY
Warm skin pressed against my cheek, pulling me from the most marvelous dream. A dream where I was walking on a path cut through a sunny meadow, wearing a long white sundress. I was holding a bouquet of Pierre de Ronsard roses, my mother's favorite flower.
"Wake up, love."
Love?
Secretly, I was afraid I was going to wake up to an empty bed; that he would have gotten what he came for and left without a word.
"Good morning," I whispered softly.
"It's not morning yet, but I do need to leave before everyone wakes up."
My lids fluttered open to see the streetlights still beaming through the darkness of the night. Reality set in, and I realized we would never have a healthy relationship; one where I could hold his hand and walk down the street, or have a picnic in the middle of the football field like other couples did.
There would be none of that. We would have to stay a secret. I stared at the frame sitting on my desk which, thankfully, was facing Charity's bed. I shudder to think what my mother would have said if she'd seen the debauchery that'd taken place only a few feet away from her.
"Is this how it's going to be? Hiding? Secrets? Lies?"
He didn't respond right away.
"Tell me," I demanded in a low voice.
"For now—yes."
My heart sunk into my stomach. "That's not really what I wanted to hear."
He swept the hair from my neck. "What do you want me to say?"
I clutched onto the sheets. "I want you to say that we'll be together." I slid out from underneath him, dangling my legs over the bed.
His hand pressed against the small of my back. "What's going through your mind?"
"I don't wanna do this."
"We can transfer you out of my class. It's still early."
I glanced over my shoulder. "Then what?"
"What do you mean?"
"You'll stop by whenever you have the urge?"
"It wouldn't be like that."
"Then how would it be?"
"I've never been in this situation. I don't have it scripted. I just know I wanna be with you."
"I want more. I want what my mom never had."
"What's that?"
<
br /> I held back my tears and shook my head. "A fairytale."
"Can you give me a chance to figure this out?"
"No. You'd lose too much, and I don't want that hanging over my head."
He sat up. "How is that your call?"
"I'm making it my call."
REGAN
She walked away, heading for the bathroom, leaving me alone to ponder the hurricane of emotions which had whipped through the room during the last few seconds. I set my elbows on my knees, planting my face in my palms, trying my best to rub away the frustration I felt toward the situation we had created by letting our feelings overrun our better judgment.
What the fuck have I done?
The one thing I said I'd never do. The one thing that would undo everything I'd worked so hard for. I shot out of bed, angry at myself, and angry at her for pushing me away after I had taken a leap.
I threw on my clothes and walked out the door just as the sound of running water came from the bathroom. I wasn't going to beg for her any more than I already had. I'd laid my heart on the table, and she had the nerve to toss it aside like it was nothing more than a mere triviality to her. Didn't she know the risk I was taking for her—both emotionally and professionally?
Fuck this.
I marched to my car and sped off, my engine revving as loud as the rage roaring inside of me. I made it home a few minutes later, still as angry as when I'd left her dorm. Pulling up to my driveway, I sat in my car for a moment, wanting to leave my hurt behind. I couldn't believe after all these years, I finally let a woman in and this is what happened. Serves me right. Lesson learned.
I turned off the engine and stepped out of the car, slowly breathing in the night air, hoping it would calm me. But all it did was encourage the memories of the evening we spent in her bed to burst forth, provoking even more resentment and fury.
Unlocking my front door, I stepped in and threw my keys and wallet on the side table. I needed a shower and a good night's sleep, and maybe morning would bring a better perspective because, right now, I was too riled up to think straight.
Teach Me: A Bad Boy Professor Romance (The Me Series Book 1) Page 8
