The One I Need (Snakes Henchmen MC Book 1)

by Alivia Grayson

  I have had one or two who've paid me to take someone out and I've ended up not doing the job because it was all bullshit. The person ended up being an innocent who those that hired me had beef with. I'm just grateful Marlon is good enough to figure the truth out quickly enough so that I don't end up killing innocents.

  Their shit is not something I wanted part of, so I dropped the job.

  I always keep the payment, I'm not stupid. Fuckers don't try setting me up and get away with it.

  Yes, I may have taken those lyin' fucks out.

  Well, you don't fuck me over and live.

  An innocent person is not a spiteful cunt who tries to hire an assassin to take out someone else. That shit is low. I don't stoop to that level. Ever.

  I took the beads from my clutch, placed them in his hand, not bothering to cover him up. He was a sick fuck who killed his own child. Why the hell should I have covered up his tiny dick? He didn't deserve modesty.

  I took one last look at Mr. Pathetic, checked his non-existent pulse just to make sure he was gone and walked out the room with my head held high.

  I was unrecognizable so I wasn't worried about being spotted.

  Even if the cops checked the CCTV footage, that would be able to tell who I was. I never look directly at any camera; my face is never frame.

  I always have the place scooped out before I enter any building. I always have to know where each and every camera is. I have to know where those who work in those buildings will be each and every time.

  This is why I charge so much for my services. It costs me money to set all this shit up. I don't just walk into a place and off a person. It takes time and thought to make it all happen. I can't afford for anything to go wrong. Period.

  I smiled to myself in the elevator mirror without lifting my head enough for the camera to pick up my face. The job was done.

  I've been waiting outside her apartment for the past hour. After this past week, I need to talk to her. She's been away for a week so I haven't had the chance yet. God only knows where she's been, but Jett told me not to worry. Idiot thinks I see her as a little sister the way I do Willow. I do in a way.

  But it's more than that. It's not just the fact I want to fuck her, and I do want to fuck her, quite badly, in fact. I feel something more, I want all of her. Everything.

  Hell, what the fuck am I talking about? I don't even know what I feel for her anymore. I can't get her out of my head, I know that much. I've been so worried about her this past week it's almost driven me to distraction.

  I thought she'd be home by now. Jett said she'd called him to let him know she was on her way home and wouldn't be long. I just want to check on her, make sure she's okay. I know it's late, but I won't be able to settle unless I see for myself that she's okay.

  I hear the rumble of a bike. I turn my head and see her gliding up the street on her Harley. A girl that can ride a motorcycle and enjoys it as much as me? Solid Gold.

  My mother rode bikes, she loved them, said she couldn't get enough of the wind blowing through her long hair. My father wasn't so keen on his old lady riding like that. He soon put a stop to it. To all of her dreams. He was a good man but he worried far too much about his wife and the things she did or wanted to do. But she loved him regardless. Plus, he'd have her riding on the back of his bike every day if that's what she wanted. It made her happy, and that's all that mattered.

  I watch as Nova removes her helmet and shakes out her long wavy hair before climbing off her bike. I shove my leather gloves inside my helmet and walk out of the shadows. Yeah, I'm kind of a stalker.

  “How long have you been hiding in the dark?”

  I stop dead in my tracks. How in the hell did she know I was here? I didn't make any noise, or at least, I don't think I did, and my bike isn’t in view.

  “How did you know I was here?”

  She turns her pretty eyes to me and a slow smirk creeps across her face. Man, she's hot. “Intuition.” Is all she says on the matter. Well, she's got damn good intuition. “Coming in?”

  I nod and follow her into her small apartment hardly big enough to swing a cat.

  I notice she doesn't have any bags with her. What kind of vacation has she been on where she doesn't need luggage?

  We both place our helmets on the dresser beside her front door. I then watch her in fascination as she strips away her leathers without even batting an eyelid that I'm watching her. She shimmies into her room and I follow because it's like she's cast some sort of spell on me and I can't help but do so.

  I hear her giggling to herself as she steps out of her jeans, and there she stands in nothing but her bra and panties, a perfect red set that somehow makes her body look a shade darker. Her body is so toned. God, I think I'm about to bust outta my jeans I'm so fuckin' hard!

  She's so beautiful it's stifling. Even with the visible scar on her chest above her right breast. Jett's a good-looking guy but Nova is a fuckin' goddess. They definitely have good genes. I wonder if she looks more like her mother. I know she doesn't look much like Shepard. Which is crazy when Jett looks like Shepard, and you can so see she's Jett's sister.

  “You're so beautiful.” The words came out before I could stop them. And I can't seem to tear my eyes away from her body. I don't think I've ever seen a woman with such defined abs before. I know she works out, but shit. “I've never seen a woman so...” I'm lost for words.

  “I'm not all that.” She practically mumbles, snapping me out of my erotic trance. She pulls an overly long t-shirt over her head, covering that incredible body. “I'm going to take a shower. I've been riding for hours. Why don't you grab a couple beers from the fridge and I'll meet you in the living room in a few. Maybe you can tell me why the hell you were skulking around outside my house in the dark.” She doesn't wait for me to give a response, she's already closing the bathroom door.

  What the hell was all that about?

  Sitting on her small blue couch, too small for my massive frame, I notice a small photo album on her coffee table. I sit my bottle beer on the table and snatch up the album. I sit back in my seat on this not-so-comfortable couch and open it up.

  I smile at the pictures of a little girl no older than maybe six or seven months. A pretty little thing with brown hair and blue eyes smiling wide for the camera. There are many pictures of the same child from birth to six or seven months. She's a beautiful child.

  I wonder who she is. Maybe this is Nova when she was a baby. The child definitely looks like her. Just the way Shepard described his baby girl. Just like the pictures he used to show us all.

  The front door suddenly knocks. I can still hear the shower so I know Nova isn't done yet. I know what it's like when you've been riding for hours on end and all you want to do is stand under the shower for a month and relax those aching muscles.

  I place the album on the coffee table and make my way to the door. I open it to a woman in her mid-thirties, with blonde hair, holding a sleeping baby in her arms. A cute little thing with short brown pigtails, sleeping on the woman's shoulder.

  “Can I help you?” I ask as she adjusts the bag on her other shoulder.

  “I'm looking for Nova. Is she here? I hope so, I managed to track her to this address. She wouldn't give it to me when she called, so I found out for myself.” She says while looking past my shoulder as if trying to find Nova.

  “She's in the shower. Who are you?”

  “Mandy. I'm not staying.” I watch as she places the baby bag on the floor in front of my feet. “This is Ember.” She says as she hands the sleeping babe to me. I take her, not really knowing what to do. “Rest her head on your shoulder. You're a big guy, she won't wake with you holding her.”

  “Right. You wanna tell what the hell is going on? Because I'm a little confused here.” I'm more than confused, to be honest. I adjust the baby in my arms. God, she's so small it's like holding a doll. I just don't get why she's handed her baby off to me, and why the fuck I took her.

  “Her things a
re in this case.” She pulls a small suitcase from behind her. And now I'm even more confused. “Her diapers and milk are in the baby bag along with her favorite blanket and teddy bear.”

  I narrow my eyes. Why does it feel like this woman is about to leave her baby with me?

  “You are Nova's boyfriend, right?” Boyfriend, I haven't been anyone's boyfriend in a good long while. “You're Tank, right?” I narrow my eyes again. She can see my name on my cut, any idiot can, but why the hell would she think I'm Nova's boyfriend?

  “Nova told me about you. I must say she described you to a tee. She seemed to like you from what I got when we talked the past couple times, so I assume you're her boyfriend.”

  She told this woman we were dating?

  Why on this earth would she do that?

  “Yes, I'm Tank,” I say warily. “Do you want to come in? I'm sure you'd like to put your daughter to bed. I'll make you some coffee. Nova should be out in a moment.”

  “My daughter?” She almost laughs sarcastically while pointing to herself. “Hell, she's not my daughter, she's your girlfriend’s, and I am done.”

  Nova has a daughter?

  I turn my head slightly to look at the little girl’s face. Her little head is turned towards my neck, but looking at her, even like this, I can see she's the adorable little girl from those pictures in Nova's photo album.

  “I can't care for her any longer. I know I promised Nova that I would, but I told her that I needed her to be around to help with nursing her. She told me that she would only be gone for a week, I managed for that long. It's been almost four weeks and she still hasn't come back! I can't nurse her as well as my own children, it's agony.” She touches her breasts for emphasis.

  “If she doesn't want the kid... What am I talking about? Of course, she doesn't want her. But then I promised to take her on as my own so I'm just as awful. I thought I could do this but I can't. And I know deep in her heart Nova wants to be Ember's mother, but she's fighting what she feels for her daughter. Point is, if she really doesn't want her, she needs to give her to someone who can care for her.”

  “And that's not you.” It's not a question.

  “No. It's not me. I have four children of my own and one on the way. I just can't manage. Physically, I am drained. Ember does nothing but cry, which sets off my eighteen-month-old twins. When I agreed to take care of Ember, I never realized it would be this hard.”

  “Come inside, you and Nova need to talk.”

  “No.” She smiles slightly, and I can see just how tired she actually is. “I've just driven almost four hours with a screaming baby. A baby that cries because she wants her mommy. That little girl bonded with Nova no matter how much Nova denies it.

  “My head is about to explode. I need to get home to my kids. I can't talk this through with Nova, you have no clue what she can be like when she wants something. She's extremely manipulative.

  “Ember is her daughter. No matter how that precious baby came into this world, no matter the horrors Nova suffered, that baby needs her. She can't keep looking at this little girl and seeing those monsters.”

  I narrow my eyes again. What is this woman trying to say to me without saying it at all?

  “Ember loves her mommy, Nova needs to remember that fact.” She leans forward and plants a small kiss on the baby's head. “Goodbye, sweet angel.”

  “Oh my god, I needed that.”

  With a hissed Shit! Mandy runs down the driveway and into her car. She tips her head slightly before backing out and driving away as fast as she can and speeding off down the road.

  “What are you doing out there it's freezing?”

  I turn in her direction. I've already pulled the bags inside. I kick the door shut with my boot. Her eyes are locked on the baby in my arms, and boy, are her eyes wide. “When were you going to tell me you have a daughter?”

  She shakes her head from side to side, her mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. She then turns and runs from the room. She's not running from this, from her child. I won't let her.

  I follow her into her bedroom. She's standing by the window, arms around her body like she's trying to protect herself. Carefully, I lay the baby in the middle of Nova's bed and cover her little body with the blanket from the bottom.

  “I take it Mandy took off before I came out?”

  “She didn't want to give you chance to talk her into taking Ember back with her.”

  Ember? Who calls their child that?

  “That bitch promised to care for her as her own. How could she just dump her on me like this!”

  “I don't know what's goin' on here, but that baby needs you.”

  “I can't keep her here, Tank. I can't take care of her.”

  “Yes, you can, she's your daughter.”

  “No,” She shakes her head. I'm standing right behind her, wanting nothing more than to hold her and tell her everything will be okay. But I won't. Not yet. “She's not my daughter, she's something that invaded my body for months like some kind of alien.”

  I take a deep breath in through my nose. How could she say such a thing about her own child?

  “Take her away. Please.” Her voice is nothing more than a scared whisper. And I have to wonder what she's been through. What could have been so bad that she has to push her baby away like this?

  Whatever happened it wasn't that little girl’s fault. I have to help Nova see that. I lost my parents when I was a kid and I'd give anything to have them back. Nova was torn from her father as a little girl, she knows the hurt that comes with it, does she really want her daughter to feel as abandoned? Ember is right here in front of Nova and I have to help her see that no matter what, she can be the mother she believes she can't be.

  I take her by the shoulders and turn her to face me. “I don't know what happened to you, Nova, but it wasn't that little girl’s fault.”

  “I know that! I never said it was her fault!” She yells at me. I turn my head, the baby's eyes open for a second before closing again like they're just too heavy to keep open. Good. “I can't keep her, Tank. I tried to be there for her when she was born, I nursed her, held her, broke my own heart over what to do. I'm a terrible mother. She deserves better.”

  “She deserves to know her mother. She deserves to be loved and protected. She deserves to be with her family.”

  “You think my father will love her when he finds out where she came from?”

  “What are you talking about, Nova?” She shakes her head and looks away from me. I take her face between my hands and force her to look at me. “She's a part of you. Shepard will love her regardless. Jett will love her. We will all love her, Nova. It doesn't matter who her father is.” She huffs to herself and I can feel the sarcasm in it. “Who is her father?”

  “Beats me.” She shrugs me off and walks out of the room without so much as looking at Ember.

  I can't seem to look away from her. She looks even smaller lying there in the middle of her mother’s big bed. That little pink sleepsuit with the feet is adorable. Her dark hair is pushed back in her pigtails, and somewhere in her sleep, she hangs on for dear life to the pacifier in her mouth.

  What the hell am I doing?

  Falling in love with a little girl whose eyes you haven't even seen open wide yet, Tank.

  I lean over and plant a soft kiss on the little girl’s head. I then sigh to myself and leave the room.

  I can't fucking believe this is happening! How could Mandy do this to me? She promised to keep Ember with her not fucking drive all this way and drop her off then run away because she didn't want to face me. Fucking coward!

  I can't do this. I can't be a mother to that little girl, I'd destroy her. How could I ever take care of her when I do what I do? I just couldn't.

  Ember was the product of one of the worst nights of my life. One stupid drunken night over nineteen months ago that led to that beautiful little girl in my bedroom. One stupid drunken night where I was a plaything for many. One night where
I let my guard down. Payback is a bitch for a reason.

  I spent months after that night fighting to get my strength back, months destroying the lives of those who thought they could beat me. It wasn't until the day I gave birth that I even knew I was pregnant.

  Can you believe that?

  I thought I had appendicitis. Until the doctor told me I was moments away from giving birth. I was alone and terrified. I'd made sure after putting Celia into hiding to keep myself segregated from the world. Always alone. I had no one to turn to, no one to care about me. All I did was train my body to be the temple it once was.

  The moment Ember was born, I begged the doctor to take her away. I didn't want to see her, didn't want to love her. I knew should I hold her in my arms, I would never want to give her up. But I knew that I had to. I knew I would never be stable enough to care for her.

  Mandy was my neighbor at the time. I didn't really know her but for saying hello each morning on my runs. She was at the hospital the same time as I was. She was visiting a friend of hers who'd just given birth to a baby boy. She saw me through the glass in my door and popped inside to say hello.

  I told her about the baby and how I couldn't keep her. At first, she didn't understand how I couldn't love my baby. It wasn't the fact I didn't love her, I loved her more than I could ever say. It was because I loved her so much that I knew I couldn't keep her.

  In the end, I told Mandy exactly what had happened to me and why I believed I couldn't care for my daughter. Okay, I didn't tell her what I do for a living that would have been suicide, but I told her how I travelled around a lot looking for my birth father.

  That's when she agreed to take the baby and raise her as her own. At the time, she had eight-month-old twins, and a three and four-year-old, all boys, and she believed Ember would fit right in. The little girl she never had. I was so grateful to her. I felt such a surge of relief.