Closing The Gap (Dangerous Pasts, #1)

by Colleen Charles

  Lake slid open the metal gate and allowed Lily to pass through then slipped her halter over her ears and let her trot free. Snorting and blowing, she gave a beautiful natural pose as though she knew Craig had started to pack up and she just wanted to be contrary.

  Craig noticed it as well. “Lake, take a look at Lily. That mare is such a major pain. I’ve never known a horse to be so arbitrary. I know she can’t think logically but every time I see her, I’d swear on the bible that she can.”

  “No doubt. Sometimes I wonder why I adore her so much.” She gave a wink to Craig. “Could it be that she’s Flame’s mother?”

  “Most likely.” Craig walked forward to hug both Lake and Summer before he turned towards his SUV with his camera bag slung over one broad shoulder. “It’s been great working with you both, as usual. I wish you luck with the auction and Josh Adams. Poor guy, if he had any idea the nature of the conversation here today, he’d probably stay in Chicago. The proofs will be back early next week. I’ll e-mail them to you in a digital file and you can call me when you make a decision. I can’t wait to hear how it goes on Friday. Have a great day, you two.”

  Lake stared straight at Summer’s face and silently begged her not to speak as she realized she’d still move this plan forward, accompanied by shaky confidence. Could Josh Adams inspire her to experience any sexual desire long buried? It had been years since Lake had known any deep emotion sparked by an attractive man. She wondered if her lady parts were still operational. Without being involved in a meaningful relationship, her activities seemed common and shallow as though she were a tumbleweed that skittered across the surface of her life.

  “Thanks so much for helping with Lily today, Summer. I appreciate it. I know you probably have better things to do.”

  “I wanted to help. I know how important this Gazette issue is to your advertising for Flame’s futurity campaign. I do have coffee planned with a client to discuss an upcoming e-mail blast for their farm so I should run. We’ll talk later.”

  Summer gave Lake a quick hug and strode towards her Mustang. Lake stood in place, enjoying the silence for a few glorious moments before turning towards the barn. As much as she wanted to continue standing in the warm Scottsdale sunshine, playing mental fantasies starring Josh Adams, she had work to do in the barn. Summer had burst her bubble and allowed her old doubts to come out. It was going to be a long day.

  Chapter Two

  Buck Hoeff ruminated, tucked inside the meager space. The door had been locked securely. He’d checked it ten times. It had to be ten, exactly.

  The bathroom. His favorite location to placate the voices. They echoed through his head so often they’d become his habitual partners. In the tight confines, he became impregnable. Safe to express, safe to prepare, safe to plot. The haters, like gnats swarming his head, safely sealed on the other side of the flimsy wooden barricade.

  An imbecilic doctor had labeled him manic depressive. He felt great. He didn’t need his medication. After the nurse dispensed it, he hid it under his tongue and spit it out later. His future wouldn’t involve dealing with anymore doctors. Didn’t everyone recognize his superior intelligence? I outsmart everyone I meet.

  Handsome and charming if you barely knew him, he’d mastered superficial relationships and most still held him in high esteem.

  Some didn’t. Some knew the truth. He was a sociopath.

  Buck’s inviting exterior camouflaged an elemental breed of deranged as though he danced in a sanity masquerade with his mask affixed to his eyes hoping no one would recognize his affliction. If the haters could hear him, they would fetch a tranquilizer, or perhaps, flee the scene. His stream of consciousness garbling terrified those without long tenure caring for the mentally unstable.

  “Stupid bitch, she won’t even realize what hit her. Mere words cannot express how much I hate those nasty, stinking, four-legged bastards! I’ve hated them since the God damn day I was born. I don’t care if it’s the Lipizzaners, the World’s Toughest Rodeo or the fucking Canadian Mounted Police! Dead, cold and six feet under is where they all belong. Just try and stop me, no one will ever stop me! No one ... no one!”

  He continued chanting over and over as he rocked back and forth on the fuzzy, toilet seat cover, hugging himself in a tight grip.

  One woman knew first hand.

  The man was certifiably, bat shit crazy.

  There are really only two types of people, Josh:

  Those you now love.

  And, those you will love.

  That's what life's for~

  The Universe

  Chapter Three

  The turbulence jolted through his body like a jackhammer. Josh laid his head back against the leather airplane seat and sucked a deep breath as he drummed his fingertips on the armrest. Short on sleep at the end of a road trip, he wanted to catch a few precious minutes of rest before the jet hit the tarmac in Phoenix. Anxious to spend this time with his dad, he reflected back on their last conversation. Josh rejoiced that Chuck Adams had found happiness in his Scottsdale retirement complex after the death of his wife, Kathy, back in 1996 from breast cancer. The best wife and mom ever in his humble opinion, her family and friends still missed her more than words could say. Chuck and Kathy had worked so hard throughout his happy childhood to provide for Josh and his brother, Jason, back in Glen Ellyn.

  Jason had married Lisa ten years ago, and the whole family enjoyed their two vibrant and active little boys, Tyler and Turner. Each time he thought of their family unit, that same old longing settled deep in his bones. That life wasn’t meant to be his no matter how he might wish it was different. The accident had made sure of that. The accident, and her.

  “Folks, from the flight deck, we’re beginning our decent into Phoenix where the local weather is 68 degrees with winds out of the SE at about 10 MPH. We appreciate your business and hope you enjoyed flying with us today. We should have you on the ground shortly. Flight attendants, please prepare the cabin for arrival.”

  Josh pried open his heavy eyelids and brought his seat back forward. His 6’3”, 220 pound frame still cramped in spite of the first class seat. So much for meeting his dad not looking like death warmed over. More than anything, he didn’t want his dad worried about him. Chuck tried to be both mother and father and knocked himself out in the process. Josh was grateful for the sacrifices his dad had made for himself and Jason to the detriment of his own happiness. To say that Josh admired his father was an understatement. By the time he had gathered his newspaper and iPad, the landing gear deployed and the pilot gently laid the jet on the runway.

  As the plane taxied to the gate and the jet way swung towards the cabin door, Josh waited for the ding of the seat belt sign and brushed his hand through his hair, unable to contain a smirk. He had airplane head and hoped he wouldn’t be recognized or photographed. Major hair erections littered his scalp and stuck straight up not adhering to his normal hairstyle. He was lucky he still had a full head of hair, but as time wore on, his black strands had become more and more peppered with silver. He had a baseball cap in his carry on so as soon as he stood, he grabbed it, stuck it on his head and deplaned. He made sure to smile at the captain and flight attendants as he stepped over the threshold.

  Grabbing his iPhone from his jeans pocket, he hit the button for Siri, not having enough hands to scroll his recents.

  “Call Jason.”

  Siri’s soothing voice came on over the phone’s speaker. “Calling Jason, mobile.”

  “Hey, bro. Have you landed? Are you with dad?”

  “The plane just landed and I’m in the airport. I’m headed for a pit stop at the men’s room before I call him. I just wanted you to remind me again why I’m doing this? Horny old women addicted to plastic surgery are not my cup of tea. I made a major mistake last year and I don’t want history to repeat itself. I wouldn’t mind making an honest error in judgment if the Chicago society pages didn’t ride my ass without mercy every damn time it happened. Don’t they have som
e other idiot to harass?”

  “Don’t worry. You’ll be fine. Dad wouldn’t make you do this if it wasn’t for the homeless dogs he loves so much and that Lake chick he keeps mentioning. The way he goes on about her, she must be the Raquel Welch of the fifty plus neighborhood. I’m picturing them together holding hands at the auction. It might be a Kodak moment. Make sure you get me a photo of her. I hope he’s getting some, even at his age.”

  “I know. She must have a heart of gold. I think they developed such a strong bond because she’s a transplant with a Midwestern upbringing, just like dad. I hope she doesn’t resemble a troll. Dad deserves so much and asks for so little. Thanks for reminding me of that important fact. I’d do anything for him. The fact that this fundraiser supports dogs waiting for their forever homes just puts another nail in my coffin of guilt. I guess there’s no backing out now.”

  “I’m happy to give you a pep talk any time. I know how much you love dogs yourself and how upsetting it was when we lost Emma back in high school. Maybe you’ll get to adopt your own dog once you move out of that damn condo after you retire. Have I told you lately how much I hate that place? It reminds me of a not so happy time. Everywhere I look, I see Shelly’s face.”

  “You haven’t mentioned it recently, but I’m well aware of your feelings on the subject. Unfortunately, it’s a great building near work. Now’s just not the time for a major move. I’m going to call dad and see if he’s on his way. I’ll touch base in a few days and give you an update on how it went. Thanks for the support as always. I appreciate it. Send my love to Lisa and the boys.”

  “Will do. Good luck, Josh. I’m sure it will turn out to be much better than you expect. You might even have fun since you scored that private ice time at Jobing. Charming the ladies has never been an issue for you no matter their age. Let’s hope your date can still see and hear.”

  “I will definitely be hoping for the best. Thanks again. Bye, Jason.”

  After hitting the end button on his call with his brother, he asked Siri to dial his dad.

  “Joshua, is that you?” His dad sounded anxious. He wasn’t an expert with the caller ID feature. Chucks voice floated over Josh and he relaxed, comforted by the familiarity.

  “It’s me, dad. The plane just landed and I’m heading for the baggage claim. I carried on so I don’t have to wait for any more luggage. Which door should I head towards, where it’s easiest for you coming in to the airport?”

  “It would work best for me to come in on the south side. I’ll see you in a few minutes. I called ahead to make sure your flight was on time and I’m in the car. I’m looking forward to our time together son.”

  “Me too.” He pushed the end button and slid the phone back in his pocket.

  After a quick stop at the men’s room, Josh rode the escalator down towards the passenger pick up lane. He kept his head lowered and avoided eye contact. Arizona wasn’t a huge hockey state so luck stayed with him and none of the other passengers recognized him. Too exhausted for chit chat and autographs, he just wanted his bed in his dad’s guest bedroom. Spending time at his dad’s, enjoying the Arizona spring weather, would refresh him.

  Josh received appreciative glances from attractive woman on his way through the airport but he wasn’t interested. Even though he’d womanized back in his late twenties and early thirties, he didn’t have the energy for anymore shallow and vapid hook ups. The women he met in the Chicago social circle always looked and acted fake. He despaired of ever being married again and having the soul fulfilling love like his parents and brother. Oh well, he juggled his bags in his hands as he searched for the exit door. He faulted himself for most of it.

  Blessed in his career and family, he’d resigned himself to bachelorhood. He certainly never lacked for willing participants to date or sleep with him. He chuckled as he fantasized about his future. Maybe he’d find someone he wanted to love once he was old and running around the retirement community in his golf cart. It sure as hell wasn’t Shelly or Lauren.

  You know, Lake, you've been blessed, with a great number of gifts. Your insights, good taste, and savoir-faire. Friends who adore you, elements that support you, and spiritual laws that serve you. Yet, in my book at least, what really takes the cake, Lake, is that you get to be you.

  I pulled a few strings~

  The Universe

  Chapter Four

  Lake gulped a breath of air through her diaphragm and exhaled it out her glossy lips. She strategically considered avenues to bolt from her table in front of the temporary stage, draped in elegant plum colored silk. She wondered if she were to summon a black hole would it swallow her whole? If she wasn’t on the board of the charity, she could hide in the back and have more courage in anonymity.

  The décor for the bachelor auction stunned the senses. The planning team had really knocked it out of the park. Deep plum, silver and crystal accent pieces decorated the patio of the host hotel. The flowers delighted Lake’s eyes with their beauty and also lent a light and pleasing perfume to the crisp air of the May evening. Strings of twinkling lights hung from the railings and a blanket of stars lit the sky as if someone had tossed a handful of large diamonds into the stratosphere. The venue sparkled with the brilliance of sun dancing on fresh snow. It looked magical and resembled a fairytale playground for adult women. The high voltage ambiance crackled with insane energy and those women were ready to play.

  “I rock the house.” Lance Richmond slipped into his seat next to Lake at her table. Lance served as Lake’s personal assistant and had earned a huge chunk of Lake’s heart. Like a brother rather than an employee, Lance had helped Lake through her challenges and the move from Minnesota to Arizona. Lake was grateful for the money she’d received from the insurance claim and subsequent law suit as it had allowed her the opportunity to start fresh in a new location. That Lance and Summer had followed her provided an unexpected blessing. He and Summer made her laugh. That Lance was a magician with wardrobe, hair and make-up, did not hurt his cause.

  “What I meant to say, boss, is that you look irresistible.” He flashed her his perfect white teeth in a charming smile, a perfect accessory to his black evening wear. He wore his dark blond hair slicked back with mousse and his hazel eyes danced with merriment.

  Lake snapped out of her anxiety at the compliment. “Thanks. I may appear composed on the outside but I feel like I’m going to vomit. Would it raise too many eyebrows if I skipped the auction and went home early?” Lake wrapped one of her thick, blonde curls around her finger and twirled it, rubbing the hair along the scar. She knew Lance would recognize it as her personal sign of emotional distress but she couldn’t help it. She regretted ever sharing this ridiculous idea with Summer the day of the photo shoot. Now her brave sister would never let her hear the end of it if she chickened out.

  Lance captured her hand and gently placed it back in her lap.

  “Do not wreck my masterpiece!” Earlier in the day, Lance had round brushed and curled Lake’s long hair section by section for well over an hour, making sure it covered her scar. Her long lashes were curled and her shadow done into a smoky eye that showcased their unique dark green color. The eye make-up, along with her pale pink lips made her sage green evening gown really pop. Lake avoided exposing her legs, embarrassed by the multitude of tiny scars etched into the skin of her calves, feet and ankles. Clothes always covered up the worst one. Because of it, she feared getting naked. No man besides Lance had ever seen it.

  The designer gown was elegant, yet sexy. Constructed of shimmering silk with diaphanous cap sleeves and a corset back, it showed off Lake’s curvaceous figure to its best advantage. The material sparkled with thousands of tiny Swarovski crystals that adorned the bodice. Lake looked spectacular. Although, Lance mentioned it often, she didn’t believe him. People might tell her she’d never looked more incredible than she did tonight but she just couldn’t internalize the compliments. Her internal dialogue often ran amok, causing her feelings of claustrophobia. She f
elt like she resembled a caged animal in a traveling sideshow, beautiful to the casual observer, but trapped inside herself.

  “Lake, I am without words!” Summer flounced towards her sister sporting a strapless, red mini that left little to the imagination. Summer would be at the ready if she decided to dance the Paso Doble later on in the evening. Her dress flowed like a red cape set to incite the alpha male bulls of Scottsdale. So much for her sister advising Lake that she shouldn’t wear red. Summer had the market cornered on that daring color.

  “Sis, you’re a bombshell. The slut won’t even know what hit him.” Summer gave a wink and a toss of her wavy chestnut hair that brushed her shoulders. She pursed the cherry red lips that matched her dress and blew Lake a kiss.

  “To which slut are we referring? There’s a plethora of them listed here.” Lance picked up the program from his place setting and opened it, scanning its contents for clues.

  “You mean she hasn’t told you about her latest hair brained idea? She’s planning to bid on the date with The Trashman!”

  “The trash man? Does he own a disposal company? Why am I not in the loop?” Confusion danced across Lance’s face.

  “He was a star defensemen for the Chicago Blackhawks and now he’s a broadcaster for their local network. He earned that nickname for his potty mouth and bad attitude.”

  “Really? Sounds like just my type. Can he do anything else with his potty mouth besides antagonize the opposition?” Lance peeked over the paper, his face dripping with feigned innocence. He didn’t hide his sexuality and had been out since his late teens. His overall flamboyance and flair for the dramatic provided comfort to Lake. Lance lightened the mood during the times Lake found the darkness starting to close in on her, extinguishing her fragile confidence.