by Nova Blake
It wasn't all real. It couldn't be.
Somehow I had to believe I'd sleepwalked through all the guys’ defenses and went for a wander. The woods - they weren't the same as the ones here, at least, not entirely. The owl, the wolf, the hooded man. The red stone. I flexed my fingers, but in my fugue state I hadn't thought to look for it. If I had, it might be evidence of where the dream might have ended and reality kicked in.
I closed my eyes, not able to focus on anything around me. My vision was still swimming something awful and a churning roil had kicked into my stomach.
"Hang in there, I'm going to take you home." His voice was void of any grumpiness, all that lay there was concern.
I'd never worried Colton while not simultaneously pissing him off and I didn't want to think about what that meant. Instead I just enjoyed behind held by him. His arms felt so good around me that I could almost forget about what had just happened. He rarely touched me so this was a treat.
"You smell good," I said. I yawned and snuggled further in. His rough laugh rumbled through my chest.
"You smell like something the cat dragged in, but I think that's the least of your problems." He sighed. "Any idea how you got out?"
I shook my head and lifted it so I could look into his eyes. "I thought I was dreaming. There was a man chasing me, and an owl, and a wolf and..."
Colton gave the slightest nod. "I saw him, the wolf, that is. That bit at least wasn't a dream." He pressed his lips into a firm line and I would have killed to know what was going through his mind because his face gave nothing away.
"Am I going crazy?" I closed my eyes, not wanting to watch his face, not even sure I wanted an answer.
"You're not crazy, Ebony. You're just waking up to the world around you. The one not everyone can see." His voice cracked as he spoke, emotion he didn't normally show leaking through.
My eyes shot open and I peered at him. His focus was on the path, not on me, so I grabbed his face and pulled it towards me. "What are you talking about?"
"It's not my place to say." He shook his head sadly. "Only Rafe can do that, or Hunter. And they'll have to after this. I knew it wasn't a good idea. None of this was a good idea, but I didn't have a better one at the time-" He cut off his sentence, lips twisting into a bitter line. "I should have had a plan. I'm sorry, Ebony. I..."
I shook my head so violently that he had to put me down. "No," I said. Pointing my shaky finger at him. "This isn't on you. I know it's not. I don't even know what it is, but I know this much. You..." I didn't know what the right words were. I didn't even know what was happening to me, just that I knew with overwhelming certainty that Colton would never lie to me, not unless he had no other choice, and that his stupid over responsibility would make him feel guilty when there was no need.
And that I needed him to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I knew this.
He put his hands on my shoulders, my shakes subsiding as if by the magic of his touch. His breath misted in the air between us and he looked down at me with those deep green, soulful eyes.
"Just not you. I don't want you saying those things. I don't know why." I shrugged, feeling small beneath his towering frame. Sheltered.
"You have no idea how much that means to me, though maybe soon you will." He took his hands off my shoulders and I felt bereft, like my favorite blanket had been removed.
"Why don't you like to touch me?" I asked. Because I wanted him to touch me. I wanted him to be near me; that need so deep that I felt like I might break apart if he wasn't there to hold me together.
His head dropped into his chest; he looked like a lost boy. "I'm afraid," he whispered.
"You won't hurt me, you're strong, but you'd never hurt me." I reached out, my hand moving up to trace his jaw. He flinched away, the pain in his eyes so bright when he looked at me.
"I'm afraid that if I touch you I'll never let you go. I couldn't bear to lose you."
My heart stopped beating and my lip trembled. I didn't know what to say so I stepped in, closing the distance and pressing myself against him. His arms wrapped around me, blocking out the rest of the world and crushing me into his scent, his being. My head rested perfectly under his chin; he was my cliff to shelter under, my unbreakable wall.
"You won't lose me," I said. "Not while I have a say. Not so long as I still breathe."
I could feel his smile on the top of my head. "Well, at this rate it won't be long. Come on, we need to get you inside."
I leaned against him and he squeezed me tighter. "I wish we could stay here, just for a little longer."
"If you want me to keep breathing, then we need to go now. The others will kill me if they spot us loitering outside the property."
I sighed melodramatically. "Fine. Come on then." I took a few steps, but my ankle was still aching painfully. Colton scooped me up with a shake of his head.
"Next time, you're walking." He moved forward, his stride eating the distance down the street to our house. I watched his face as he walked, so focused on the task that it was hard to imagine the vulnerability I'd seen in his eyes just before. He had a lot more depth than I'd perceived and apparently I had hidden feelings that were coming into the open.
Something was changing, not just between me and Colton - or me and the others - but inside me.
And I wasn't sure I was ready for it.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Colton set me down once we got inside the house. The early rays of dawn were broaching the sky and Felix came out to greet us.
"What the hell?" He stood in the doorway to the lounge, his face pale and eyes wide, darting between me and Colton.
"You need some sleep," I said. "Me too. I think. Or maybe that's not the best idea." I hobbled into the kitchen and got some water from the fridge.
"Where was she? How did she get out?" Felix asked Colton, his tone panicked. “I swear, nothing went off. I’ve been awake the whole time.”
"I don't know yet.” Colton kept his voice low, but I didn’t think it was so I wouldn’t hear. “I just had a feeling I needed to check the woods, and there she was, stumbling around with a wolf."
"Oh shit. We can't contain this can we? It's time."
Colton murmured his agreement as I closed the fridge door, both sets of eyes on me.
"Contain what?"
Felix scrubbed his hand over his face. "We need to call Hunter. We need to come up with a new plan."
"No, you need to tell me what the hell you're talking about."
Felix moved towards me, but stopped when he saw the firmness in my eyes. "Princess, if we could, we would. Can you trust me on that?"
I shook my head. "I don't know what I can trust. I'm having insane dreams. I'm sleep walking. There are enemies hankering for my blood. And the people I care most about in this world are keeping things from me."
Colton took a step forward, his hand raised as if he could deter the flow of my frustration. "It's not like that. We don't want to - not Felix, not me, it was never our choice. If we could, we'd just tell you."
"So just tell me!" I threw my hands in the air, frustration leeching away any sliver of rightness I'd been feeling. When they didn't respond I spun and headed for the stairs. "Just tell me when Hunter gets here. Because I assume he's the one who can tell me what I need to know," I flung over my shoulder.
"Ebony, wait." Felix moved after me.
"Just let her go, man," Colton said. "She needs to cool off."
Yesterday I would have assumed he was being mean, but now I knew differently. He was right. I did need space. I wasn't sure I'd be able to cool off though. The same old feeling of knowing I was being kept in the dark and not knowing why ate at me.
I stumbled my way up the stairs, using the banister to maneuver. My ankle was throbbing like a bitch and before I got to the landing I was in tears, hot, wet trails down my face. Please don't let anyone see me. Please don't let anyone see me. I hobbled to my room. Pushing the door closed behind me I let the sob escape as I locked the door
and leaned my head against it.
It was all too much and I didn't want to talk to Hunter. Didn't want to face Rafe or the others. Couldn't bear the look of disappointment I'd see in their eyes. None of them would care that I had no idea how I'd escaped the house. Just that I had.
Sheehan had been right. I should have told them, but they had their secrets and I'd felt like I needed to keep my own.
I pushed off the door and limped to my bed, sitting down on the edge and dragging my phone off the charger. There were only a few missed messages and calls, but then, just about everyone was still asleep. There was one from Sheehan though.
You have to tell them, or I do. I can hear them talking downstairs.
I sighed. I'll come clean when Hunter gets here. Don't tell them that you knew. This is on me.
It took a full minute for him to reply. No, I stand with you.
It's better for me if you're not in trouble. Just let me wear this one. Please?
As you wish.
I clutched the phone to my chest, wishing I could get him in here to hold me. But before anything else I needed to get cleaned up. I stripped off the ruins of my PJ's and headed for the shower.
THE THUNDER OF FISTS on my door pulled me from sleep, and I knew that this time I wasn't dreaming.
"Come on, open up Ebony. We need to talk."
Rafe. Hunter’s second in command. Leader of the fearless protectors. Normally, I didn't have a problem with him, but today I didn't even want to look at him.
"Go away," I said.
"No."
"I'm not opening the door." I pursed my lips, debating my options, then grabbed my phone and text Sheehan. Come drag Rafe away. I can't deal with him right now.
Silence...
Please?
I'll try. No promises.
A door down the hallway opened, closed, and then Sheehan's footsteps sounded on the carpet of the landing.
"No, she needs to come out," Rafe said to him, and then louder so that I could hear, "If she doesn't, you know Hunter is going to unscrew the door and carry her downstairs."
I let out a groan and tossed my phone on the bed before standing. Strangely, my ankle seemed a lot better. I tested my weight out on it. Yup. Much better. Maybe the level of hurt had been bound up in the nightmare, in my tiredness. I couldn't even begin to process what had happened, or tease out which bits were real and which weren't.
Steeling myself, I unlocked the door and pulled it open to reveal a rather weary looking Rafe with Sheehan standing behind him.
"I assume he's already here then?" I folded my arms across my chest and sighed.
Rafe nodded. "Are you going to walk down or do I have to carry you?"
"I'll walk, but only because I want to get this over this. It's time we all came clean." I gave him a pointed look and then brushed past him, descending the stairs and entering the kitchen.
Hunter sat at the head of the table, so I sat opposite him, making note of Colton on my right, and Felix on my left. Sheehan came to stand behind me and I felt like I was bolstered. These men, at least, supported my right to know what the hell was going on.
Zephyr sat between Felix and Hunter, and Rafe took the seat opposite, leaving Brax and Arien hovering in the kitchen.
No one said anything until Hunter cleared his throat.
"No," I said, getting in before he could. "You've come here to tell me off again but that's not how this is going to go down. I've kept secrets from you, yes, but you've kept some from me as well. It's time we be honest with each other."
"Why don't you go first," Hunter said. His mouth twitched, as if he was actively trying not to say something else.
"Why doesn't someone make me a coffee and I'll consider it. And a toasted sandwich. In case you didn't hear, I had a bit of a rough night." I gave Hunter a pointed look as I crossed my hands on the table in front of me.
And waited.
Arien moved first, getting me the coffee before returning to the kitchen to start the sandwich. The smell of it cooking made my stomach rumble, breaking the silence.
Rafe opened his mouth. "I think-"
"No," I said. "I've waited a long time to hear what's going on, a few more minutes isn't going to kill you."
Rafe sighed and rolled his eyes at me, but Hunter was placid, like a predator who had his prey in sight and was content to wait until it as at its weakest before it leapt.
After Arien put the plate down in front of me he retreated to the kitchen, putting the bench between him and the rest of us as though that would protect him. He might stand for the truth but he'd never been one to confront an issue head on, and I didn't blame him; this was my battle. I was ready to fight it.
"I've been having nightmares since we got here. Recently, I've begun to sleepwalk. Last night, I left the property and got through all our defenses without triggering them, stumbling into the woods. Colton found me and returned me to the property." I gave him a nod of acknowledgment. "Do you know how I escaped?" I turned my eye to Felix.
He blanched, his gaze darting toward Hunter and then back to me. "You’d been told the windows were all nailed shut, and that we didn't have surveillance on them due to that. Your window, being on the second floor, was a low priority. Somehow you managed to pry those nails out and escape that way. I didn't see you leave the property when it happened, though I've checked all the tapes since then and there was an elbow and a foot on one." His head dropped. "I didn't see it. I should have seen it. We should have had a camera there.”
"You're one man, and you're only human," I said. I reached out and squeezed his hand, wishing that some of his usual joyfulness was present.
"It was my job. I stuffed up." He sighed, resigned, and raised his head again. "We can get more cameras. More sensors. We won't assume anything."
"Damn right you won't," Hunter said. "How did the other alarms not work?"
"I don't know." Felix shook his head, a bewildered expression on his face. "I honestly have no explanation for it. She should have tripped all the sensors, there should have been a warning bell."
"I heard her," Colton said. "I don't know how, but I heard her need, and that's how I found her."
"Maybe you should have just implanted a tracker on me," I murmured, recalling Felix's joke from the day before.
"Yes. Do that," Hunter said, thumping his fist on the table.
I glared at him. "There are two issues here," I said, trying to regain control of the situation. "The first is that someone might know where we are and be coming to kill me-"
"What?" Hunter stood up so fast that he knocked the chair over.
"You didn't fill him all the way in, Rafe?" I leaned back in my chair and raised an eyebrow. I thought for sure he'd have laid it all out for Hunter, but clearly not. This could work in my favor.
"Rafe?" Hunter turned his glare towards his second in command, his hands planted on the table and his muscles cording from the pressure he was applying.
"It's true. We suspect they have an idea of our location. Since locking down, we haven't seen any signs to confirm that though." Rafe kept his face straight, his words professional. "I know that we should have called you in, but we thought it best not to in case it was noticed." He raised his eyebrows meaningfully, though I had no idea what the meaning was.
Hunter huffed out a breath and then straightened his chair and sat back down. "The first issue is that someone might know where you are, and the second?" It was his turn to raise an eyebrow.
"Is that I'm having nightmares and somehow magically escaping the house. Or is that not big enough for you to consider it an issue? You can have the best protection in the world but it means nothing if I'm able to waltz through it without detection." I was angry now, because that was their job. I had been doing my best to keep it my problem, but it wasn't now. I could not be controlled. They could not control me.
And just like that the rage shattered. I could not be controlled. I was free.
"How long have you been having nightmares?"
Colton asked gently.
"Since we got here. I thought you all knew that." I thought back to that time. The first days were foggy, but ever since I’d become fully aware of myself they’d been a nightly encounter. And perhaps stalling sleep hadn’t helped.
"And when did they escalate to sleep walking, that you know of?"
"The night after-" I shut my mouth.
"The night after you went into town," Hunter finished for me. "While you might claim no one saw you, that you were not noticed, clearly something happened."
Colton coughed and I looked over at him. He mouthed the words 'the comb' at me and I groaned, sinking my head into my hands. The room seemed to spin and I felt like the biggest idiot in the world. Now, did I come clean about that or do my best to hide the evidence?
No, I needed them to be honest, and so I had to be too.
"When I bumped into the old lady she gave me a comb," I admitted. "I didn't think anything of it after that night. It's under my mattress. But it's just a comb. A little wooden comb. It can't be making me sleepwalk." I got up from the seat and ran upstairs, surprised that my sore ankle now only twinged slightly. I felt around under the mattress and came out with the comb, heading downstairs to throw it on the table. "See?"
Zephyr picked it up, looking over each side of it before passing it to Hunter. He barely looked at it before handing it to Rafe. "Destroy it. Now."
Without delay, Rafe left the table.
"But it's just a comb!" I cried. "A silly little comb."
"But what if it's more than that? You don't know everything, Ebony, you have to trust us, be honest with us."
"It comes back to this, again? It's a bitter pill to swallow when I'm the one who has to trust and not you. I deserve to know what the hell is going on here."
"She does," Felix said. His voice was quiet, but it cut clearly across the table. "We've kept her in the dark too long, this latest development, the sleepwalking? It's time. Everything is coming undone and we need to speed it up so that she knows. She needs to know."
"I agree," Colton said. He was looking at Hunter. The two men locked eyes and if I'd had to decide who looked more furious I couldn't have chosen a winner.
