Fall Into Me (A British Rockstar Romance)
Page 43
For a moment, we were alive, together, and nothing else really mattered. It was strange to think of it that way, but it was true. For some reason, being with this man made me feel things I’d been denying myself for a long time, things I thought I’d never get another chance to feel. It made me wonder why I had ever decided to stop seeing him in the first place. All his old flaws seemed so unimportant now…
“Are you going to fuck me?” I asked quietly, my laughter gradually coming back under control. Nathan’s eyes smoldered as he stared at me, making my knees quake just looking at the heights of his arousal. So maybe I was still horny. This was the man capable of providing the most incredible sexual experiences of my life, and I wasn’t ready to stop.
“I didn’t bring a condom,” he said, his eyes traveling up and down my naked body. “Are you on the pill?”
I shook my head, glancing over at the bed. “You packed three miles of Egyptian cotton, and not one single condom?” I asked.
He grinned wolfishly. It made my heart flutter. “I’m supposed to be locked up in this apartment with Detective Hard-ass. Don’t you think packing condoms would have been a little presumptuous?” he answered.
“I assumed being presumptuous was part of your core nature,” I replied, letting out a little laugh and looking away from his impossibly sexy cock, still rock hard and ready to please. Why couldn’t I just have it once—just this one time?
Nathan reached down, pulling me to my feet and straight up into his arms. It was a completely different experience when compared to the way he’d pressed against me from behind. Here in his arms, in his embrace, I felt safe.
“You know, Sandra, maybe we can’t fuck, but there’s more to me than my cock,” he whispered, licking his lips. I yelped in surprise as he picked me up off the floor, cradling me in his strong arms and carrying me swiftly to his bed.
The billowing sheets beneath my exposed flesh were like heaven on earth, and for a moment, I was able to forget the smell and the disrepair around us. I was able to ignore the shoddy apartment altogether and focus solely on what this handsome and talented man was doing to me.
Nathan’s hands glided over my body as he lay gentle kisses up my milky thighs. His mouth was so soft, so tender, and even his little love bites made me coo as he lightly inflicted them upon me in a hot, scintillating trail. Just as I thought he might drive his lips right into my sensitive heat, he passed by it entirely, instead sweeping up my stomach toward my tits.
“Oh, God,” I gasped as he drew a nipple between his lips and flicked his tongue across the tip. He suckled it lightly, laving it with his hot tongue before bestowing upon it the softest of bites, scraping his teeth with utmost care across the delicate nubbin. Then he pulled away to guide his hands up beneath my large mounds, lavishing my other breast with the same tender, electrifying sensations.
“Don’t stop,” I begged him as he pulled away, kissing up to my neck. For a moment, he was between my legs, his cock pressing hard against my thigh. I could feel him throb with desire, each of his spasms sending ripples of desire through me. But we couldn’t do this—not without protection.
“Relax, Sandra,” Nathan whispered into my ear, planting a kiss on my neck that was so tender it made me swoon. “I’m not going to fuck you. Not this time…”
This time. That implied this was more than just a one-off fling. Did he see more in me than just an opportunity? Did he regard me as more than just a warm, female body placed conveniently in the same living space?
More importantly, was I starting to feel the same way?
The thought of letting Nathan plunge his enormous shaft deep inside me was almost irresistible, but I fought the urge to capture him with my legs and drive him into my wanting core. I kept myself from throwing him off me and riding him at a gallop until exhaustion overtook us both. He rewarded my patience, slipping downward again, kisses trailing across my chest and back toward my spot, my throbbing and aching spot. I was desperate to feel his touch again.
His mouth found its way over my bare, swollen mound, planting kisses across it before dipping between my folds and letting his tongue run a soft line up to my nub. I cried out loudly as I rode his silken tongue, letting him write love letters in soft strokes that sent me higher than the sky.
I shivered in ecstatic bliss as one of his fingers found its way inside me, followed by a second, their thickness nowhere near big enough to fill the yearning emptiness at my core. I wanted the real thing, wanted to feel his cock burying into my depths, his bare skin inching into my own. Even so, I groaned and bucked against his flickering tongue, letting his mouth drive me higher and higher as he pumped his fingers into my quivering flesh.
Nathan was moaning now, the vibrations rolling through me from head to toe. Every part of my body was shuddering, another long and wonderful orgasm crashing over me. Nothing could possibly feel this good. It was criminal for this man to be so wealthy and so talented in the sack. I wanted to arrest him. I wanted to handcuff him to my bed and never let him stop. I could keep him as my own personal prisoner.
But he didn’t stop. As the waves of my orgasm rolled and began to fade, he rotated his wrist, bringing his fingertips against the front wall beneath my taut tummy. Without a word, he curled them, running across something that shot a jolt of renewed pleasure through my body. With a laugh and a smile, he attacked that spot, every thrust of his fingers bringing me further into madness. I was drawn into oblivion, the feelings so warm and rapturous that I could only call this place heaven. I lost all semblance of control as I gave myself to the sensation.
In that moment, Nathan had me… Body, heart, and soul.
6
I hadn’t fooled around like this since I was a teenager. The bed was a wreck, my skin singing with joy at the caress of the wonderful cotton beneath me. No wonder Nathan brought these sheets. They probably cost more than I spent on my entire bedroom set at home, but I didn’t care. I wanted to spend the rest of my life wrapped in this stuff, living in this dirty little apartment with the billionaire who had brought me such unfathomable bliss.
I glanced over at Nathan. He was quiet, his chest rising and falling slowly. We’d spent most of the morning right here doing everything except fucking. I’d worn the man out, and truth be told, he wasn’t the only one who was exhausted. Even now I had slipped a finger between my thighs, just remembering all the wonderful things his tongue had done to me.
But it was no use. I couldn’t conjure the same sensations that Nathan had inflicted upon me only a few hours ago. I sighed in frustration, looking over at him once again. “This isn’t fair, you know,” I murmured, knowing he couldn’t hear me.
No man deserved to be this good in bed - especially not one born into an unholy pile of money and such a god-awful handsome face. In the past, our sexual encounters were fast and furious, but the last few hours had been completely different. Nathaniel Hale hadn’t fucked me. We had made love…
Ordinarily, I’d have felt lucky to land him, but a little voice in the back of my head kept asking if maybe this was only happening because we were stuck together.
I shook the voice out again, ignoring it. Nathan made me feel things no man ever had. If he was using me, well, I was happy to use him right back. Maybe this would last a week, maybe it would last longer, but right about now, I didn’t care. Our futures were uncertain in more ways than one.
And that meant I was going to need to do a little shopping.
Nathan was going to stay put, but I could slip out for a few minutes to pick up some supplies. Besides, I was starving. I climbed out of bed, and a few minutes later I was presentable enough to hit the corner store. I smiled at myself in the mirror, barely even recognizing the sparkling eyes staring back. It had been awhile since I was this happy.
It was a strange feeling—happiness. It was something I’d denied myself for what felt like forever, just another self-inflicted punishment in the wake of my Jenny’s death. That was the thing about loss: instinctively, we all w
anted to hold someone or something responsible. There had to be accountability. It was an intrinsic part of the human grieving process. Nobody ever wanted to hear, “accidents happen,” because then it meant there was no one to blame.
You had to direct all those feelings somewhere. All that anger and anguish and rage—you had to let it out. Unfortunately for me, I was the only one who could bear that burden, and at the time, I’d thought I deserved it.
What had changed? How could a night with Nathaniel Hale absolved me of the guilt I’d carried?
On the way down the hall, a man inside one of the rooms watched me pass through an open door. I recognized the rookie immediately, and gave him a little nod.
“Babysit him for a few minutes,” I said quietly. He stepped out into the hall, shutting the door behind him. “I’ll be back in fifteen. Going to grab some breakfast and a few supplies.”
The rookie nodded as I walked past him. He wasn’t about to question a detective, and that was all the better for me, because Captain Pierce probably wouldn’t appreciate my little store run.
It didn’t take long to reach the ground floor, and although the shitty little Honda wasn’t much to look at, it was comfortable enough on the drive up the street. I flipped on the radio, letting a little music fill the cabin. Its helped me clear my head.
“What are you doing, Sandra?” I asked myself, gripping the steering wheel a little harder. Sure, it was fun to mix a little business and pleasure, but I’d worked damn hard to make detective. It had taken years before the men around me gave even the smallest amount of respect. Was I really going to risk that for another ride on this man’s billion dollar dick? What would they say if they found out Detective Williams had slept with a witness?
My own self-doubt wasn’t stopping me from grabbing the biggest box of condoms from inside the glass case at the supermarket.
I finished my little shopping trip with a few bags’ worth of groceries. We now had all the fixings for a few days of properly good breakfast, a handful of quick microwaveable dinners, and plenty of bread and lunch meat. I would have loved to do more, but this wasn’t going on the police budget, and first year detectives aren’t exactly rolling in the dough.
I was on my way up the stairs to the room with the heavy bags straining my arms and digging into my fingers when I realized something was wrong. The rookie wasn’t in the hall where I’d left him, and he didn’t respond when I rapped quietly on his door.
Fuck.
I lay the bags down on the floor, pulling my gun from the ankle holster beneath my jeans. I’d only been gone twenty minutes. Twenty-five, at most. I stepped up to a window along the hall that was streaming light into the cramped space with the row of apartment doors. Out on the grounds, I could still see a few of Nathan’s security team, but that was no guarantee that someone hadn’t slipped by.
I did the only thing I could do. I burst into a run, barreling down the hall toward the farthest door. There was only one job I was supposed to be doing, and I’d went and screwed it all up for some grub and a lousy pack of condoms.
As I came to the door, I saw it was slightly ajar. I kicked it in as I swept the gun across the room, immediately feeling embarrassed as the rookie and Nathan both sat quietly on the little couch with their hands in the air.
“What are you doing in here?” I asked the rookie, about ready to strangle him for scaring me like that.
“Sorry, detective. I had to report to Captain Pierce that you’d stepped out. He said we have a credible threat on Nathaniel Hale’s life and asked me to move rooms until the threat was over.”
“There’s no room in here!” I protested, glancing from the rookie to Nathan.
“Don’t worry, I’ll make do with the floor. Captain says it should be safe to leave you two alone in a few days. Three days, tops.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. As I stepped back into the hall and went back to retrieve my grocery bags, there was a definite feeling of contempt rolling through me. Captain Pierce had it out for me, and he’d been orchestrating this whole thing as a way to embarrass and harass me. I should have seen it coming. I should have seen past the heartfelt speech he’d given me, past the mock attempt he’d made to get me to say “no.” It had all been a lie, every last word of it. I wasn’t held in any higher esteem now than when I’d joined the damn force as a wet-behind-the-ears rookie.
And now, what little enjoyment I was getting out of it was going to be ruined by some stupid kid just out of the academy sharing a few hundred square feet of living space.
“Fuck,” I whispered as I lifted the bags and started back toward the room. Maybe it wasn’t so bad. The angel on my shoulder was telling me shacking up with Nathan again was a bad idea. And the devil on my other shoulder? Well… she was telling me we could make it a few days and still get what we wanted.
That happy thought didn’t make the time pass any quicker.
The next few days were impossibly dull. The three of us made do, sharing the couch and watching what few channels the antenna on our shitty little television could pick up. In the meantime, I took shifts with the rookie, keeping an eye on the grounds. Nothing changed except for my discomfort. The kid was a snorer, and his proximity to my couch made bedtime a real bitch. Thankfully, Nathan had a spare set of expensive earplugs in his bag-of-many-tricks, and by the end of day three, things had improved from a hellish nightmare to marginally tolerable.
I went to bed as usual, sprawling out on the couch and shooting one final glance over at Nathan. He was watching me, a smile plastered across his handsome face. “Soon,” I mouthed, smiling back as he gave me a little nod.
I shoved the plugs in my ears, drowning out the buzz-saw laying on our floor, and in no time at all, sleep found me.
7
I woke up to much more favorable circumstances. My eyes fluttered open and filled with visions of a room full of flowers. Every kind and color were strewn about, bright bursts of warmth and romance in an otherwise dismal space. The smell of impeccable floral arrangements filled my nostrils as I found myself nearly blinded by light streaming in through the unfettered windows, the curtains drawn to reveal the magnitude of the beauty around me.
It should have been special. It should have made me happy.
Instead, the pretty flowers put a cold coil of dread in my stomach.
Nathan was sitting on the end of the couch, a triumphant smile on his face as he watched my eyes open and focus on the innumerable vases and bouquets around me. “I couldn’t guess your favorite,” he told me, “but after the last few nights, I figured you might need a little pick-me-up to remind you that world’s not such a bad place, after all.”
I stared at him, my mouth dry. “Where’s the rookie?”
“Gone. The captain moved him back down the hall early this morning. I thought you’d be happy,” he said, his head tilting to the side as he studied my obvious displeasure.
“Nathan… you didn’t charge this to the card the department gave you, right? I mean… there’s no way it’s loaded up with enough money for this…”
He frowned at me like I was insane. “Of course not!” he laughed. “I used my personal one. I’d never put your job in jeopardy like that.”
I sat up, clutching the blankets to my chest and the semi-sheer cami covering it. “Your personal card? You aren’t supposed to have a personal card! You just put yourself in jeopardy, Nathan, and right now, my job is you! Jesus fucking Christ, have you lost your damn mind?”
“It’s a card for a subsidiary business. There’s almost no chance anyone could track the purchase back to me…” His face fell as he watched me. His lips parted as if there was something more he wanted to say, but I ran him over before he could get the words out.
“Did you have them delivered? Please tell me you did.”
“Well, yeah. I couldn’t just carry them by myself…”
“You ordered online? Over the phone?”
“No. I wanted to see what they had. I took a
drive down there myself.”
I groaned and covered my face with my hands. He couldn’t possibly have done something so stupid!
“What’s the big deal? It’s not like the Paddies are hanging around at flower shops…” Nathan said.
“Let me guess: you went to the closest one, right? Leslie-Anne Floral Designs?” He nodded, and I snorted in disgust. “And what’s her shop across the street from? McFadden’s-fucking-Pub! Or didn’t you notice when you were ignoring everything the Captain tried to drill into your skull before we came to the Peachtree Overlook to spend seven miserable days together?”
Nathan recoiled as if I’d physically struck him. I damn sure felt like it, but it almost looked as if what I’d said had stung him worse than any slap ever could. What can I say? I’m not normally a morning person.
“Sandra, I just… I just wanted to be good to you. I wanted to do something nice—”
“Then you should have listened!” I raged. “You shouldn’t have put both our lives in jeopardy, and by extension, my fucking job!” This was a disaster. All my panic, my self-doubt, and the pent-up frustration I’d been carrying around with me exploded, showering Nathan with the hot ash of my rage. “You think the men out there didn’t notice two thousand dollars’ worth of flowers being carted up here? The whole damn neighborhood probably watched it happen! What do you think the Captain is going to say about this?” I shook my head, flinging off the blanket and pulling a shirt out of my duffel bag. “Just when I’d thought you’d started to change…”
“I don’t get how buying you gifts is a bad thing,” Nathan said, standing up and following me. “Okay, so I took a risk. But I wasn’t followed. I made sure of it. I…”
“You don’t get to hear me say ‘no,’ and then do it anyway,” I snarled, whirling on him so fast our noses almost collided. “That’s not being nice, Nathan. That’s being a fucking entitled asshole who thinks they know best, even when he oh-so-clearly doesn’t. That’s deciding that what you want to do matters a hell of a lot more than what others want. That’s the spoiled rich kid in you coming out to play, and I don’t think it’s fucking cute.”