A Dye Hard Holiday (Curl Up and Dye Mysteries, #5)

by Aimee Nicole Walker

  Gabe followed me to the kitchen to grab some drinks for our guests while I checked on the progress of the food. Everything looked and smelled delicious. Gabe must’ve thought so too because he swatted my ass on his way back to the family room.

  Chaz and Mere were the next to join me in the kitchen. I told them everything that happened since I last saw them on Tuesday, which was surprisingly a lot.

  “So, you’re not looking for a new doctor?” Chaz asked humorously.

  “Or a new place to live?” Mere inquired.

  “No to both,” I said. “We’re mature adults now.”

  “Uh huh,” Chaz said. His grin told me he was enjoying my potential misery way too much. “We’ll see what happens when the kids have their next doctor’s appointment.”

  “Bet Gabe takes them by himself,” Mere added.

  “Nah,” Chaz said, shaking his head. “He’ll stand in the corner with his arms crossed over his chest looking as menacing as he can.”

  “Hand on the butt of his gun,” Mere added. “It would make a lasting impression.”

  “You two are a couple of comedians,” I told them, but I couldn’t stop grinning at the image they created in my mind. I still hoped for the best outcome, which would be Trenton moving on from Blissville.

  “Where’s Dare?” Chaz asked. “I thought he said he was joining us today.”

  “He sent a text and said he would be a few minutes late because he needed to pick up his date,” I told them.

  “Date?” Mere and Chaz asked at the same time.

  “Since when is he dating someone?” Chaz followed up.

  “I thought he was too infatuated with Wren to even see anyone else. Wren left town for the weekend so we know it’s not him,” Mere added thoughtfully. “Who else could it be? Memphis is already here. Beefcake Andy?”

  “Better not be,” Chaz said with widened eyes. Kyle still didn’t like Andy anywhere near his man.

  “We’re running out of eligible gay bachelors,” Mere said.

  “Wouldn’t it be funny if his date was—”

  “No!” I said, cutting Chaz off. “That would not be funny at all.”

  “Maybe not to you, but the rest of us would sure as hell enjoy the show,” he fired back.

  I looked to Meredith for help but she was too busy laughing. Luckily for them, I blew off his remark because I knew it was his writer’s creative imagination at work. There was no way the universe was mean enough to play a trick like that on me, right? Of course not. Don’t be silly.

  “Maybe he and Wren finally decided to quit circling each other and Wren decided to stay in town after all,” Chaz offered as an alternate theory.

  “That would be much better,” I replied, crossing my fingers and toes that it would be so. The two men were as opposite as night and day, but there was an undeniable spark when they were in the same room. In fact, I wanted it to be true so bad that I half convinced myself that Chaz was right. I imagined the two fellas deciding to quit fucking around and start… fucking around.

  Dare still hadn’t shown up by the time dinner was ready, so I figured he changed his mind or something came up. I set out all the food and desserts buffet style while Gabe refilled drinks. We had just sat down to say grace after loading our plates to maximum capacity when the front door opened.

  “Sorry that I’m late,” Dare apologized. “I had a bit of car trouble.”

  “Where’s your date?” Chaz asked.

  “Oh, he’s outside taking a call. He said that he’ll be right in.” No sooner had the words left Dare’s mouth, the front door opened again. The cold breeze that entered our house with the new arrival was nothing compared to the icy chill that worked its way down my spine.

  I heard a deep, rumbling growl from beside me. I wished I could say it was Buddy making a fuss, but it was my husband. “What’s he doing here?”

  I squeezed Gabe’s thigh beneath the table. “Baby, I had no idea.”

  “Get rid of him,” he said between gritted teeth.

  I wasn’t sure how to do that without looking like a complete dick to my friends, family, and my employees who had joined us. I thought that making a big deal over his arrival was the worst thing I could do. Trent looked at me and smiled crookedly. Did he enjoy riling up my husband? Did he have a death wish? I saw Gabe lean in Jon’s direction and worried that he was hiring a hit.

  “Everyone, this is Trent,” Dare said, gesturing his hand between Trent and the rest of us. He was completely unaware of the tension he had created with his guest, and I wanted to keep it that way.

  Trent looked over the food on display and said, “Oh, damn. I was hoping you made that amazing apple pie for dessert, Josh.” Yep, the dumb fuck had a death wish.

  I KNEW DAMN WELL that Josh hadn’t been a virgin when we met, but neither was I. We each had lovers in our pasts and neither of us owed an apology for the choices we made before we knew the other existed. It wasn’t rational to be so angry about the other guy’s existence, but I was furious. I hated the idea of that fucking prick touching Josh or making him come, but I couldn’t really pitch too much of a fit with my ex-boyfriend—the one I had moved to Blissville to be with—sitting at our dinner table with us. But, there were two big differences between Kyle and Trent: Kyle was invited, and the gleam in Trent’s eyes said he was there to start trouble. If it was trouble he wanted; then it was trouble he would get. But first…

  “You made him my apple pie?” I asked Josh, whose face was almost devoid of color. “My apple pie?” Okay, so I was irrational and slightly insane. I felt the eyes of our guests jockeying back and forth between me and the newcomer.

  “Baby, it wasn’t your apple pie when I made it for him,” Josh said calmly. On some level, I realized he was right, but I felt as if Trent had walked into my house and kicked me in the nuts. Trust me, a man takes exception to that!

  I stood up from my chair, tossed my napkin on the table, and pointed to Dr. Dickhead. “You come with me.”

  “Gabe, please…” Josh’s hand snagged my wrist before I could leave the table.

  I looked down at his face and saw the silent plea in the hazel eyes I adored. I pulled his hand to my lips for a kiss. “I won’t be long, Sunshine.” I glanced back at the doctor who wasn’t looking quite as smug as when he first walked through the door. “With me.” I turned and headed toward the kitchen, knowing that he’d either willingly follow me or I’d drag him by the scruff of his fucking neck. I’ll give him credit though; he didn’t make me wait long.

  “Do you realize whose house you’re standing in, Trent? Can I call you Trent?”

  “Uh, sure.”

  “I’m going to need you to be a little bit more specific,” I said, sounding like I was interrogating him. Hey, the bad cop never went away; he bided his time until he was useful again. “Are you saying ‘sure’ that you know whose house this is or that I can call you Trent?”

  “Both,” he answered nervously.

  It wasn’t just my tone of voice; I used my entire body to intimidate that little weasel. I stood tall with my back ramrod straight and my chest slightly pushed out. I could break him with my bare hands but hoped it wouldn’t come to that. It was highly frowned upon for police captains to rough people up. I could almost hear Josh’s snark comments about another IA investigation.

  “Why are you here, Trent?”

  “Dare invited me.”

  “I know that part, but why did you accept? Furthermore, why did you walk in with that smug look on your face?”

  “I wasn’t aware that I had a smug expression on my face, and I thought dinner at Josh’s house sounded good. He’s a phenomenal cook.”

  “I know damn well that my husband is amazing everywhere, so I don’t need you to start ticking off his attributes.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest as I remembered the way Trent had hurt Josh in college by making him feel that he wasn’t good enough to introduce to his friends and family as anything more than an acquaintance. I saw th
e admiring glances he aimed at Josh the night that we ran into him at the hospital when Sally Ann gave birth to Adrianna and again when he walked in as Dare’s guest. I knew fucking well it was no coincidence that he chose Blissville for his pediatrics rotation. It was best he knew where things stood to save himself from looking like an ass.

  “Your breakup with Josh wasn’t amicable so why the hell did you think it was a good idea to come here? Better yet, how’d you meet Dare to get an invite?”

  “Um, my breakup with Josh was a long time ago,” Trent countered coolly. “It’s obvious he’s moved on and very happy, or maybe not, if you think dragging me in here and warning me away is warranted.”

  I took one step toward him and he took two steps back. His little spark of bravado fizzled out beneath the menacing look I aimed at him. “He’s deliriously fucking happy,” I groused, “but I’m not here to speak on his behalf. My husband can handle himself just fine. I want to be sure you’re not taking advantage of Dare’s kind heart.”

  “I met Dare when I went to Curl Up and Dye to schedule a haircut last week.”

  Josh didn’t tell me that Trent had showed up at the salon. I thought we had cleared the air and there would be no more secrets or attempts to keep me from losing my shit, but apparently not. The very thought of Josh touching Trent’s hair made me want to punch the doctor in the face. I knew it wouldn’t have the same meaning as when Josh massaged my scalp or ran his fingers through my hair when we kissed or made love, but still. He wasn’t getting my motherfucking pie, and he would need to find someone else to cut his stupid fucking hair.

  “I stopped in to see Josh, but he wasn’t there, so Dare scheduled me an appointment with some other guy named Robin.” His words relieved the tightness in my chest.

  “Wren.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Wrong bird, dumbass. His name is Wren.”

  “I’m not a dumbass,” Trent argued defiantly.

  “Your actions today don’t back that up.” I held up my hand to cut him off when he opened his mouth to speak. “I’m not going to make a bigger scene than I already have, so you’re in luck. You can stay, eat our food, drink our beverages, and join in on the conversation with our friends and family because this year is special to all of us for one reason or another. Do not look at my husband like he’s on the menu again. Don’t assume he’s the same guy you knew years ago, and don’t insinuate that your shared past actually means you know him, because I promise that you don’t know the first thing about Josh Roman-Wyatt. So, Trent, the question is: can you eat dinner with us and behave?”

  “You kind of sound like Clint Eastwood,” he replied with a crooked smile. “Yeah, I’ll be good.”

  “Welcome to our home,” I said somewhat cordially. “Grab a plate and dig in.”

  I remained in the kitchen after Trent left because I knew that Josh was hovering by someplace close and would want to speak with me. I was prepared for him to lecture me about my behavior, but instead he pushed me back against the counter and ravaged my mouth.

  “Oh my God! I shouldn’t encourage your ridiculous behavior, but it’s so fucking hot. It makes me want to drag you and your knuckles upstairs and show you just how much I belong to you.”

  “Okay,” I said, wrapping my arms tightly around him. “I’ll let you.” I had never been so disappointed that there wasn’t a hidden staircase that led to our bedroom.

  “Gabe, one day you’re going to realize that there’s no other man on this earth that I’d rather give my body and my apple pie to more than you.”

  The comment about the pie made the ridiculous jealous feelings stir inside me again. I could tell by Josh’s smile that he knew it too.

  “Gabe, I was only eighteen years old when I dated Trent. I didn’t have access to bourbon, so the pie he remembers is not the same pie that I make for you.” He ran his hands through my hair, and I practically melted into a puddle on the kitchen floor.

  “You’re not cutting his hair either.”

  “What are you talking about?” Josh asked.

  I repeated what Trent had said. Josh snorted when I got to the part where he butchered Wren’s name.

  “Let’s go enjoy our first Thanksgiving dinner with our babies,” Josh said softly. “The nonsense with Trent doesn’t matter. I won’t be cutting his hair, and he can’t cause trouble if we don’t let him.”

  “You’re right,” I told Josh, earning a shocked expression. “Hey, I admit when I’m wrong.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “It just happens so rarely that you can’t remember, Sunshine.”

  All eyes were on us when we returned to the dining room—well, all except Trent’s. He kept his eyes on his plate of food while Dare looked worried and dejected beside him. I smiled at Dare so he’d know the things that transpired between Trent and me were not his fault. If anything, Dare was another victim of Trent’s narcissistic personality. Dare reminded me of a younger Josh, and I found it unlikely that Trent had a change of heart when it came to flamboyant men. But you did, the pesky voice in my head reminded me. Shut the fuck up, I shot back.

  I felt terrible when I realized that our guests were waiting for us before they ate. Josh worked so hard to prepare the delicious meal, and it sat getting cold while I acted like a jackass. I reached for Josh and tugged him to me once more. “I’m sorry that I ruined your delicious dinner.”

  “You didn’t ruin anything; you were just being you. Besides, how do you know it’s delicious?”

  “You made it,” I said as a matter-of-fact. I looked around the room at our guests. “I’m sorry I kept you waiting.” I received various looks in exchange. The knuckle draggers in the group understood where I was coming from, even if they didn’t realize the extent of Trent’s past with Josh. The rest of the adults were a little more level-headed and wore bemused expressions. I was happy that I didn’t see disappointment on our mothers’ faces. In fact, they looked almost proud of my assertiveness. My two favorite little faces smiled up at their papa like I did a great thing.

  “Let’s say grace so we can eat,” Meredith said. We all joined hands and bowed our heads. “Heavenly Father, thank you for the bountiful blessings you’ve given each and every one of us. Thank you for the love you’ve brought into our lives, for it is the greatest gift of all time, and one that never stops giving. We ask for your continued blessings and guidance in our lives today and each new day that follows. Please help us to realize the beauty in the world so that hate will never dwell in our hearts. In Jesus’s name, we pray.”

  “Amen,” we collectively said.

  Then all talking ceased as we dove into our food like half-starved animals. I reached beneath the table and squeezed Josh’s knee to let him know how much I loved every bite I crammed into my mouth. By the second round, lips started to loosen up to include other activities like talking. No one was quite sure how to approach the topic that was on everyone’s minds. Okay, all but one.

  “How do you know my son?” Bertie asked Trent.

  “We met at college,” Trent said cordially.

  “Oh? Josh never mentioned you,” she replied. I couldn’t have loved her more unless she pulled a gun out of her purse and shot the prick. Bertie was not a gun-toting mama, so that is one fantasy I knew wouldn’t come true.

  Trent blushed because Bertie’s comment could’ve come across that Trent was so insignificant that Josh never mentioned him. I wanted that to be the case, but the truth was that Trent, following so closely after the horrible relationship with Billy I-Hate-Myself-For-Being-Gay Sampson, really did a number on Josh. It was like Josh had told me. Billy was ashamed of being gay, but Trent was ashamed of Josh. I might not be the most perfect man on the planet, but compared to those two dumb fucks, I was quite the catch.

  “Well,” Trent said sheepishly, “I didn’t treat Josh very well, so it’s not surprising that he didn’t tell you about me.” Trent darted a quick glance in my direction before he looked at Josh. “It’s really my only regret
in life.” Did he mean that losing Josh or mistreating him was his biggest regret? “I’m sorry, Josh.”

  “Fucknugget! Fucknugget!” Savage squawked. The bird’s timing was impeccable as always.

  “Please excuse Gabe’s bird. He has terrible manners,” Josh told Trent. Hey, at times like these, I’ll gladly take responsibility for Savage’s dirty mouth.

  “Dirty Bird!” I said, but my voice lacked admonishment. I was in awe of my feathered friend.

  “Bite me!” came Savage’s reply.

  “Bad Bird!” Sassy squawked accusingly.

  “Cockbadger!”

  Trent’s slack-jawed expression was priceless, but the outlandish behavior barely got a response out of the rest of our guests since they were so used to it.

  Josh just shook his head and talked over the crazy birds. “Thank you, Trent, but as you can see, I’m very happy. You really shouldn’t give it another thought.”

  Yeah, what my husband said, asshole.

  “Thank you for being so forgiving.” Trent then looked back at me and offered a wry, but non-threatening smile. “I hope to have a fraction of this kind of happiness someday.” I decided I would take that as a compliment and not his plan to steal my man and kids.

  There was quite a bit of grumbling about the missing apple pie, but there was enough pumpkin crap to go around. I had to admit, Josh’s homemade cinnamon whipped cream made the stuff tolerable, but it would never replace the love in my heart for his boozy apple pie.

  Trent and Dare left not long after they finished eating. Dare looked like a kicked puppy, which made me dislike Trent even more. I hated that Josh 2.0 got his hopes dashed by the doctor. Once they left, the mood resembled that of our normal gatherings and the shenanigans ensued. Barbs were traded between spouses, complaints about sports were lobbed like weapons, and Josh took all our money in poker.