Baby By The Billionaire - A Standalone Alpha Billionaire Secret Baby Romance (New York City Billionaires - Book #3)

by Alexa Davis

  Sure, it hurt me a bit; sure, it made me feel a little like crap that it couldn’t come true, but I didn’t let that part come in. I kept the good thoughts coming while I drifted into a whole wonderful set of dreams with Milo still wrapped around me. To be honest, I was glad that he couldn’t read my thoughts because the dreams I ended up having were so serious, so romantic, and so full of a love that could never be, I probably would have sent him running for the hills. Even if we couldn’t ever be together, I didn’t want things to end like that...

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Milo – Wednesday

  Waking up with my arms wrapped around a woman was an all too familiar situation, but this time everything about it was different. Everything about Eliza was unique, and it made all my reservations just fall away.

  Maybe there was a way we could make this work. Maybe we could be together, visit every so often. If we wanted one another enough, I felt confident that we could do it...

  But then the rose-tinted quality of sleep fell away, and I thought about things more rationally. It was a nice idea, but how long before the novelty wore off? How long before we got irritated by the situation and everything started to fall apart?

  I had to remember that I wasn’t out of the woods with my health yet, and that things could easily come crashing back over me. It wasn’t fair to Eliza to bring her into my world permanently without warning her what it might be like, and I wasn’t ready to talk about it yet.

  I just didn’t want to get into that horrible topic of conversation. I wanted to breeze past it and forget it. It had consumed me for far too long, and now I never wanted to think about it again. Maybe that wasn’t the healthiest attitude, but it was all I had.

  Plus, she was leaving today anyway. I had to accept that as fact. And chances were that would change absolutely everything. She would probably forget about me quickly, and if that were to happen, then I needed to move on, as well. I couldn’t be hung up on someone who had their own life – nothing was sadder than that.

  This was only supposed to be a vacation. I was never supposed to get so heavily involved. I was supposed to have fun, see a different way of life, and find my zest for life once more. Yes, I had thought there might be time for women, but I never assumed any of this was going to happen. I’d never thought I would end up feeling things that I didn’t know were possible.

  Eliza stirred in my arms, making my heart skip a beat. Her dark hair cascaded over my skin, tickling me, making me want to hold her even closer. As her eyes flickered open and a happy smile burst over her cheeks, I felt horrible that it was all going to have to come to an end. We were perfect for one another, but we’d found each other at the wrong time,

  “Morning, beautiful,” I muttered almost under my breath. “How are you?”

  “I’m good,” she replied lazily, stretching her arms above her head. “That’s the best night of sleep I’ve had in ages. How about you?”

  Did she have to be so unbelievable? So heart-stoppingly wonderful? If only I could think of a negative quality she possessed, it might have made things a little easier.

  “Same.” I felt good – too good – and that was the problem. “I can’t believe that I’ve already been here for a month. On the one hand, it seems like forever, but on the other, it’s flown by.”

  “Wow,” she said, as though that thought struck her like horror. “Yeah, that’s insane.”

  I only had a month left now. I was halfway through my trip which meant... Well, neither of us knew what it meant. Nothing good at any rate.

  I remembered the moment I arrived in Florence, and when I first met Eliza, how bowled away I was by her, even if I did act a little distant. I instantly found her beautiful, but I also found her clumsiness weirdly attractive, the way she was just happy to be herself. I was drawn to her, I could almost sense that she was special, but I hadn’t wanted to read too much into it at the time. It had made me feel strange.

  Clearly, I had noticed her more that I cared to admit because I could still recall her very first face to face words to me, as if she’d only just spoken them aloud.

  “Hello, there. It’s nice to meet you in person. Yes, erm... Yes, I’m Eliza.”

  Such a simple conversation gave me an instant clue that Eliza wasn’t used to dealing with renters. How little I knew then that she was about to change my whole life forever. Would I have acted differently if I did know? Would it have changed anything? Would I have been more cautious, or more keen to jump right in with both feet?

  “So, I suppose I have to leave today.” Eliza suddenly brought my attention back to the present moment and the horror of the day. “I’ll get all my stuff out of your way, and you can enjoy the rest of your vacation in peace.”

  Don’t go... I don’t want peace... I just want you to stay...

  “Okay,” I said instead of what I was thinking. “Sure thing.”

  She shifted from foot to foot, looking embarrassed. “I mean, if you’re ever lonely while you’re here and you want me to cook for you, give me a call. That was part of the deal with me staying here, after all. I’m more than happy to hold up my end of the bargain.”

  I nodded, but I already knew that I wouldn’t do that. It would feel a bit too much like a booty call, and Eliza was much too good for that.

  Or maybe I would, but only if being in Florence without her became too unbearable for words. Maybe I’d throw my pride to one side and do what my heart so desperately wanted me to.

  “Okay, well, I’ll leave you to it then.” I shot her a lingering look and she bit down on her lip, but neither of us were saying what we wanted to say. It was so obvious that we both felt the same way, but that the roadblocks in front of us were too big to overcome. “Come and say bye before you go.”

  As I wandered back into my room, a morose feeling consumed me. She was going. She was in the other room now packing her things, then she’d be gone, and I would be stuck here in this cabin all by myself. Why had I ever thought that the peace and quiet was a good idea?

  As soon as Eliza left, it would only serve to remind me that I didn’t have her anymore, that I didn’t have anyone close to me. Yes, I’d have the time to focus on moving forward, the job I was supposed to be doing while I stayed here, but that didn’t feel quite as appealing anymore.

  I stroked Veil for a while, holding him close. If he knew what was going on, which to be fair he probably didn’t, then this would hurt him, too. At least we had each other. I might not have been one for being mushy about my pet before, but I hadn’t ever needed him quite as much as I did now. Now his company would be the only thing getting me through.

  Eliza’s light knocking at the door could only mean one thing: she was already packed, ready to go, much too quickly for my liking. Why do things with her always whiz past? I wanted to cling onto each moment, to savor it, but I just couldn’t seem to make that happen.

  “Coming,” I called out, standing up, but somehow that message didn’t quite get across. She seemed to think that I said come in because the door clicked open quickly.

  “I’m going now,” she told me with a steely expression, as if she were trying to hold it all in herself, exactly as I felt. “I... Well, you have my number and stuff, so you know how to get hold of me.”

  She leaned down and hugged Veil, before pulling me in for an awkward embrace, too. All the warmth between us was gone. We’d become more like strangers, instead. I hated it. I only liked it when things felt normal, and this couldn’t have been further than that if it tried.

  She kissed me on the cheek, too, but still, there wasn’t any true warmth there. It felt more polite than anything, stilted, like she was only doing it out of duty. Even I was hard pressed to believe that we’d had all that passion the night before.

  “Bye,” I whispered, smiling sadly at her. “I guess I’ll see you around.”

  She paused for a second, as if she was about to say something else or ask me a question, but she must have decided against it because she quic
kly spun around and walked determinedly toward the door. Veil raced after her, and I couldn’t help but meekly follow, but she wasn’t looking at me, and it wasn’t long before I was staring at the dust trail she’d left behind.

  “Well, buddy, she’s gone,” I said to Veil in the most upbeat tone I could manage, but as I walked back inside, he stayed at the door, longing for the woman who wasn’t coming back.

  Right, I need to take action now. I needed to stop myself from falling apart. I had a task that I could complete. I had this whole Landon investment that I could focus on, just to keep me distracted from my feelings. If I didn’t do it now, if I sat down and started thinking, then I had no idea when I’d move again. It was time to make a call.

  “Hello, Justin speaking.”

  “Justin, it’s me, Milo,” I sighed, unable to keep the sadness from my tone. “I’ve been to see Landon.”

  “You have?” He sounded so happy to hear that, that it actually made me grin for a moment. He just had such an infectious personality. “What did you think of him?”

  “Oh, he’s great, isn’t he? He has his head screwed on. I like him a lot.” I paused for a second, before dropping the bombshell. “I definitely want to invest in him.”

  “I had a feeling that he’d be good for you; have you got a plan together yet?”

  “Actually,” I admitted, “because I’ve been out of the investment game for a while, I wanted to go over things with you, if that’s okay? Maybe we can have a proper chat about it when I’m back in Nevada? I can come to you, or you to me?”

  “Well, I’m in Florence next week as it happens,” he exclaimed happily. “We can go fishing if you want? Talk it over then? I mean, we can have an official meeting with my financial advisor whenever, but I’m usually pretty good at picking things up on instinct.”

  “Yeah, that sounds awesome!” I couldn’t wait to see Justin, and I also couldn’t wait to have someone other than my dog to talk to. I’d gotten spoiled with the constant companionship with Eliza, and now I was going to have to get used to her not being around.

  Unless her pipes burst again, of course. I mean, I wasn’t wishing bad luck on her, but I couldn’t help wanting that just a little bit.

  "Great, I’ll keep you up to date on the details, and I’ll see you then.”

  Once he hung up, I felt a little more positive, at least for a little while. It was going to be hard without Eliza, but I could cope. I’d been alone before. I was doing the right thing – this was the best choice for both of us.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Eliza – Wednesday

  Why didn’t I just tell Milo that I didn’t want to leave? Why wasn’t I honest with him that I enjoyed being around him too much to go? The words were right there, on the tip of my tongue. Instead, I turned and raced out of the house, taking my last chance of saying what I needed to say with me.

  The next time I saw him, things would be very different. That had been my one and only chance, and I blew it. Now I had exactly what I didn’t want: a regret about something I didn’t do. I was a massive idiot!

  I paced the salon, stress coursing through my veins as I thought about all the things I should have done differently. This should’ve been a positive day, one where I could finally get my life back to normal, but I felt like hell about it. I hadn’t even been back to see my apartment yet, and I had the awful sense that I wasn’t going to like it one bit. It just wouldn’t be the same anymore.

  “Hey, Eliza, are you okay?” Laynee’s voice broke through my shock barrier, causing my eyes to widen in surprise. I’d almost forgotten that I was in public. “You look weird.”

  “Ugh, I think I’ve messed it all up,” I whined, tugging on the ends of my hair. “I think I’ve made a huge catalog of errors and now I feel all confused about it.”

  “Milo, I take it?” she queried. “Please don’t tell me you missed the chance of one last night of fun? I might go insane if you did. You need to enjoy yourself a bit more; you spend so much time working and worrying about work. Plus, there was that whole mess with Josh...”

  Josh. God, I hadn’t even thought about Josh in what felt like forever. It was still only a few weeks ago that he’d acted like a shit on New Year’s Eve, but now it felt like forever. I could barely even recall the hurt anymore. Even if he walked in the salon right now, I knew for a fact that I wouldn’t feel anything, not even anger at his crappiness. He was nothing, just a bit part in the story of my life.

  “Oh, no, I did it.” Despite myself, I smiled a little bit. “We had a wonderful night of fun.”

  “Ooh, how was it? You know I need all the gory details.” She was like a child, but that side of her made everything seem a lot less serious.

  “No details.” I shook my head determinedly. “But I can tell you it was the best night of my whole life. He’s just incredible,” I groaned and threw my head into my hands. “I like him, Laynee, you have no idea.”

  “Does he know how you feel?” she ventured cautiously. “Have you actually told him?”

  “No, but I think he knows. He’s just ignoring it because he lives so far away, or whatever. There’s no hope for us, but I can’t help wanting him anyway.”

  She pulled me in for a hug and rubbed my back, knowing there wasn’t anything she could say. The situation was totally hopeless. I just needed to find a way to get over it. I guessed I’d been through worse, so it was definitely possible that I could do it.

  “I’m sorry, sweetie,” she finally said sadly. “I know it sucks. I felt way more messed up over Marc than I should have. Sometimes you just can’t help how you feel.”

  I felt bad. I’d been so wrapped up in how I was doing with things that I hadn’t thought about Laynee. I’d almost forgotten that she was screwed over by that asshole. “Maybe we need a man ban for a while.” I smiled weakly. “Just forget all about them and focus on other stuff instead.”

  “Yeah.” She nodded slowly, seemingly coming around to the idea. “We can focus on the salon, instead. I know that we can’t afford it at the moment, but we should start laying out the plans for my party idea, if you still want to do it. If we get everything set out in stone, then when the time comes around, we’ll be ready. Maybe we could even get an investor to get us started.”

  For a brief, glorious moment, I considered going to Milo for an investment before that idea shattered around me. I couldn’t stand the shame of having to go to him for help; it would feel far too desperate for my liking.

  “Yeah, I like that. Gives us something else to focus on.”

  “Well, we haven’t got anyone booked until a little later. Let’s start now – no time like the present!”

  We both seemed to feel a little more upbeat as we sat down to plan. This was what I needed: something else to focus my attention on, a distraction from my pointless feelings. This was the sort of thing I had to do to get over Milo completely.

  I could do that; it wasn’t impossible.

  ***

  I wandered around the supermarket in something of a haze, picking up far too much food for only one person. I had become so used to buying for both me and Milo that it was hard to get used to doing it for only me again. I even picked up a bottle of wine that I would never drink if I was by myself.

  It had only been a few weeks that I was staying at the cabin with Milo, but already my habits had completely changed. How was I going to get used to things as they once were? It was going to be strange. It already felt a little too quiet, and I hadn’t even gone back yet.

  “Eliza?” Oh, God. The second I heard that familiar voice, my heart dipped into my chest. It was someone I didn’t care about anymore, someone I never wanted to speak to again, especially not today when I was already feeling so vulnerable, but it seemed like I wasn’t going to get a choice.

  I forced a bright fake smile on my face and I turned to see him. “Josh, how are you?” As my eyes did a quick scan of his body, I had to resist the urge to shudder. How had I ever liked this guy enough to
even casually date him? He was so weedy, such a boy. He wasn’t a single thing like Milo, a genuine, proper man.

  “Yeah, I’m okay.” He ruffled his hair, looking incredibly uncomfortable. “Look, I just wanted to say sorry for being shitty with you. I’ve recently had my heart broken myself, and it’s made me realize that the way I treated you was wrong.”

  What? This whole conversation was so bizarre, it was almost laughable. Thinking about Josh getting his heart trampled on was weird enough, but the fact that he assumed he hurt me was something else. Although his shitty behavior hadn’t gone totally unnoticed by me, so maybe this apology was a good thing...

  I tried my best to keep a straight face. “It’s fine.” And then I found myself unable to resist. “Felicia, was it? I saw you guys kissing on New Year’s Eve.”

  “Oh.” His face went bright red, making him look even younger. “Oh, yeah, well it was her. I guess I liked her too much and she... Well, she didn’t feel the same way.”

  “Right,” I replied stiffly. “Well, I’m sorry to hear that. I hope you... feel better soon.” Am I living in some sort of strange dream? This is just so odd! It only got worse as he stood there staring at me for a few moments in total silence. “So, I suppose I better go...”

  “Do you want to go out for a drink?” The words tumbled out of his mouth as if he wasn’t quite expecting to say them.

  “What do you mean?” My heart started to pound. This was like a revenge fantasy coming true: my ex wanting me back so that I could throw it in his face – but now that it was actually happening, I didn’t care about it anymore. “Like, as a date?”

  “I don’t know.” He shrugged uncomfortably. “I guess I just miss hanging out with you.”

  “No, you don’t,” I assured him. “We weren’t great together at all; we wouldn’t have drifted apart otherwise. It isn’t me you miss.”