Body of Work

by Pamela Slim

  This chapter should help you feel less overwhelmed and more joyful about your connections and collaborations. Remember to trust your instincts. Creating your body of work can be a daunting task. Don’t think you have to build it alone.

  Exercise: Identify a Peer Mentor Circle

  For your next project, experiment with creating a peer mentor circle, composed of people who can give you support, feedback, and ideas.

  • Name of project

  • Objective

  • Your strengths and special ingredients as they relate to this project

  • Your weaknesses, unknowns, and skill gaps as they relate to this project

  • Names of five people you know who could help address these weaknesses, unknowns, and skill gaps

  • Means of communication you will use to solicit input from your peer mentors for this project (e-mail, video conferencing, in-person meeting, et cetera)

  • Length of project

  • How you will thank your mentors for giving you feedback

  CHAPTER 8

  Your Definition of Success

  Don’t aim at success—the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side-effect of one’s dedication to a cause greater than oneself.

  —Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

  John Stephens grew up in a working-class family in Springfield, Ohio. His father was a factory worker, and his mother a part-time seamstress. Passionate about education and frustrated with the public school options in her neighborhood, his mother homeschooled him on and off until the age of twelve, when he started high school as a child prodigy.

  His grandmother had taught him to play piano, and he began to sing in church at age seven and write songs at age eleven.

  He graduated from high school as salutatorian at age sixteen. He was recruited by schools like Harvard and Georgetown but chose to attend the University of Pennsylvania, where he graduated magna cum laude. His passion for education, nurtured by his mother, showed in his own dedication to his academic career, as well as in his interest in social justice and education advocacy.

  John continued to pursue his passion for music in the evenings and weekends, playing in clubs in Philadelphia, Atlanta, New York, and Washington, DC.

  After graduating from college, he took a job as a management consultant at Boston Consulting Group. He was known for his shy manner and excellent capability in Microsoft Excel.

  A former coworker, Jane Park, raved about his skills: “I used to work with John Stephens when he was a consultant at BCG. He was lovely and brilliant and built Excel spreadsheets like there was no tomorrow. But he also seemed quiet and I would have characterized him as an introvert. He taught me how to build complex models using buttons in Excel (for predicting the likelihood of success of early-stage pharmaceuticals). He always had his headset on—he sang softly while he worked.”

  After being a supporting player for many musicians as the side hustle to his day job, John finally got a big break after meeting Kanye West. West produced John’s first solo album, Get Lifted, which went on to win three Grammy Awards, including Best New Artist.

  John Stephens, the quiet, smart management consultant who loved to sing, changed his name to John Legend at the suggestion of his friend, poet J. Ivy, and with nine Grammys to his name, became an international superstar.

  Jane Park admits she had no idea of the star potential of her former coworker. Convinced that he was destined for a quiet career as an analyst, she doubted his ability to interact with customers. Describing her thoughts at the time, she said, “He’ll never make it in client services. I thought, ‘He doesn’t have much of a personality.’ Now, when I watch him emerge out of a cloud of dry ice, bursting with . . . personality, I eat my words.”

  After achieving fame and fortune, John Legend’s commitment to education reform and social justice increased. With his public profile and abundant resources, he:

  founded the nonprofit Show Me Campaign to fight poverty and address the issue of education reform in the United States.

  hosted the PBS special TED series on education.

  appears in the press to talk about the importance of education reform, often in partnership with peers like the Harlem Village Academies, where he is a board member.

  uses his social media platform to interact with his fans and to support his political and social causes.

  So why did the gifted John Stephens give up a safe and secure business career to pursue an uncertain music career as John Legend?

  When he got famous and rich, why didn’t John Legend leave behind the passion John Stephens had for education and social justice?

  I think it is because he has a definition of success that incorporates his roots, leverages all of his ingredients, and builds a body of work that his fans and parents can be proud of.

  You do not have to become an international superstar to have a rich and meaningful life. You do not have to give up a rich and meaningful life to become an international superstar.

  Get clear on your definition of success and how you can use it to grow your body of work.

  Success in the new world of work

  How do you define true success?

  This question has plagued academics, artists, parents, teachers, and businesspeople for centuries. It has spawned hundreds of motivational posters and thousands of quotes. I have rarely met a person in my life who does not want to feel successful.

  Personally, I define success as enjoying my life while I am living it. Which means living in accordance with my values, doing work that matters, being available to my loved ones, and staying focused and mindful in the present, instead of wishing for success in the future.

  But success is different for everyone. What does success mean to you? How do we know if we have reached the pinnacle of success? And how do you shape a body of work that leads to a successful outcome?

  I was scanning my news feed one morning and a headline jumped out from businessinsider.com: “The ‘Real Winners of the World’ Don’t Have Work-Life Balance, They Have Work.”

  In the article, career coach Marty Nemko said: “The real winners of the world, the people that are the most productive, think that this notion of work-life balance is grossly overrated. Most of the highly successful and not-burned-out people I know work single-mindendly towards a goal they think is important, whether it’s developing a new piece of software, inventing something, or a cardiologist who’s seeing patients on nights and weekends instead of playing Monopoly with his kids on the weekend.”

  I felt the heat rise in my face as I saw the term “real winner” equated with someone who avoids playing with his kids so he can concentrate on work.

  I judged him. Hard. “Why in the world would you even have kids, if you are just going to ignore them?”

  And then I realized, in a more calm moment, that my view of parenting may not be any more “right” than said cardiologist because everyone has a very different take on what it means to be a good (successful) parent.

  I was actually more bothered by the idea that there are “real winners” of the world and that one definition of success can be viewed as better than another, while ignoring the real tradeoffs of choosing one path over another.

  How do you lean into success?

  In her bestselling book Lean In, Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg argues that women have been sabotaging their own success for years by building internal barriers that limit upward mobility in their careers. Many people misinterpreted her premise as saying that all women must push higher up the career ladder.

  In fact, she says, “I do not believe that there is one definition of success and happiness. Not all women want careers. Not all women want children. Not all women want both. I would nev
er advocate that we should all have the same objectives. Many people are not interested in acquiring power, not because they lack ambition, but because they are living their lives as they desire.”

  In the years I have worked on helping people leave their cubicles to start their own businesses, I saw reverse snobbism against people who chose to remain employees in large companies.

  “You are not really free unless you work for yourself,” entrepreneurs would say.

  Really? Say that to a terrified and exhausted entrepreneur, unsure if he can pay his mortgage next month but too embarrassed to get a job, lest his friends think he is a loser for giving up too soon.

  “You are only a cog in a machine if you work for someone else.”

  But what if you have the opportunity to work for dynamic people, creating great things, in an organization that provides a competitive salary, full health benefits, retirement savings, and three weeks paid vacation that you can use to travel the world or spend time with those you love?

  Common career advice

  There is a lot of career advice that people feel very strongly about.

  If you have a traditional career, you must climb the ladder.

  If you are a strong individual contributor, you must become a manager.

  If you are a successful entrepreneur, you must scale your business.

  If you make a lot of money, you should make even more money.

  If you achieve fame and success, you should push for a bigger stage.

  There are common beliefs that keep people feeling trapped, defensive, or guilty about their choices

  If you are a woman or minority and are successful, it is because you were given breaks, not because of the quality of the work that you do.

  If you are from the majority and are successful, it is because you were given unfair advantages.

  If you have a well-paying job, you should be grateful for it and not risk stability to run a business. If you start your own business and find it doesn’t suit you, you should keep pressing forward because once you leave your job, it is too embarrassing to come back.

  If you have kids, you should not work all the time, so you can be a better parent.

  If you are a parent, you should demonstrate high standards and excellence to your kids by achieving career success.

  What definition of success do you believe?

  I recently sat on a plane next to a gentleman who had come to the United States from India in 1984. He told me, with a very heavy heart, how his son was in college and “spent his weekends with his peers working on ideas for online businesses.”

  “He is throwing away his education,” he said. “Why doesn’t he focus all his attention and energy on his career and become the best engineer he can be? That is what is wrong with this country now; we are losing our competitive edge.”

  I listened to him very patiently for more than an hour. I was too chicken to tell him that I was the author of Escape from Cubicle Nation and was working on a new book about how putting all your aspirations in a single career path was a risky career choice in the new world of work. I imagined how challenging the dynamic was between father and son when it came to career discussions.

  And yet, listening to the passion in the father’s voice when he talked about his views on work made me think that he and his son had more in common than they might believe. “I love math,” he said. “And I am helping some of the employees at my neighborhood Starbucks with their math homework.”

  While he did not agree with his son’s approach to education, he did take pride in his craft and was truly concerned about excellence. I like to think that if I had been on a longer flight, I might have been able to change his mind.

  When I told this story to some of my Indian friends, they laughed at my naïveté. Some family and cultural definitions of success are not open to discussion and debate, nor likely to change. For many people, pleasing their parents is a strong and significant part of their specific success criteria.

  If there is no agreement on societal standards of success, if you choose not to be swayed by biases, and if your parents have opinions about career that you do not agree with, how do you know what true success is?

  You must create your own definition.

  Body of Work Success Framework

  Your Body of Work Success Framework draws from everything we have talked about so far.

  Your roots

  What is deeply important to you, inherently interesting, and intrinsically motivating?

  Who do you want to impact and why?

  (Remember Amanda Wang’s determination to succeed in chapter 2, fueled by her commitment to ease suffering of BPD patients and their families.)

  Your ingredients

  Which projects utilize a compelling mix of your ingredients, leverage your strengths, and continually allow you to learn, grow, and develop?

  (Remember David Batstone’s unique combination of ingredients in chapter 3, which helped him successfully found an antislavery organization.)

  Your handling of fear and doubt

  What have you learned about yourself that will help if you get scared or feel pressure? How can you work with fear effectively so that you are still able to create and contribute to your body of work? (Remember Rafe Eric Biggs from chapter 7 and his ability to remain positive and productive through a devastating injury.)

  Your work mode

  Are you working as an employee, self-funded activist, academic, freelancer, or entrepreneur or multipotentialite?

  Which standards of success do you want to measure? (Job performance rating, impact on your audience, number of projects completed, annual sales, or enthusiasm for rate of personal and professional growth)

  (Remember Emilie Wapnick from chapter 4 and her passion for having multiple work modes and projects.)

  Your creation

  What are you creating now (e.g., a product, a degree, a book, an album, a movement)? What does completion look like? What standard are you using to measure the quality of the creation? (Number of units sold, grade point average, awards, number of comments or followers)

  (Remember Mike Carson’s passion for video and stage production in chapter 5, and the importance of creating work that will get you noticed, on his path to success.)

  Your quality of life

  How much money do you need to cover your financial needs? Are you a minimalist who is happy with few material objects? Or are you a maximist who is only happy with lots of material objects?

  How much additional money do you want to invest in your own pleasure pursuits, the growth of your business, or the service of others?

  How much money do you want to have in reserve for uncertain financial times, job loss, business, or retirement?

  Your relationships and collaborations

  What kind of friend, spouse, parent, and community member do you want to be?

  Who do you need to have around you to ensure that you do your best thinking and complete projects that are important to you?

  How much time do you want to invest in your relationships?

  How many relationships can you sustain and still have time to rest, recover and create?

  (Remember Kyle Durand from chapter 7 and his team of collaborators who helped him finally complete his software project.)

  Your emotional and physical well-being

  How do you want to feel when you wake up in the morning?

  Where do you derive true emotional well-being and satisfaction?

  Which conditions will drive optimal physical and emotional health?

  After you’ve completed this exercise, you may find that your expectations in each of the categories are in direct conflict with each other.

  That’s perfectly normal.

  If certain areas compete, which is a priority right now? Which sacrifices are you willing to ma
ke to serve your priorities?

  QUICK DEFINITION OF SUCCESS

  Sometimes, you just need a quick checklist when trying to decide which projects will give you the most satisfaction.

  Does this project allow me to:

  meet my financial goals?

  use my strengths to create products I am proud of?

  enjoy the work while I am doing it?

  construct the life I want to live?

  serve people I care about and add value to the market?

  Success dysmorphia

  You may think that if you take the time to complete your Body of Work Success Framework, you will be perfectly content and satisfied when you reach your goals.

  But if you are anything like me, you may temporarily forget your own success metrics and covet someone else’s results.

  When bestselling author Brené Brown was featured in two successive episodes of Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday, you could feel the collective pangs of jealousy from authors everywhere, knowing the power Oprah has to move books.

  After discussing Daring Greatly, Oprah looked at her and said with love, “You are my soul mate!”

  While I would love for Oprah to call me her soul mate, what is important to remember is that Brené:

  spent years of her life doing unglamorous academic research.

  bared her soul and deepest insecurities to an audience of millions with her TED talk.

  wrote a fantastic, funny, carefully researched, and extremely accessible book on a topic relevant to a huge target audience.

  invested in her platform and speaking career in a way that she was prepared to deliver a truly riveting two-hour conversation with one of the best interviewers in the world.