by Livia Grant
"Dammit, Cali. I'm not going to last very long."
"It's okay. You've already taken care of me twice."
Their pounding coupling only lasted another minute before she watched the peak he'd been holding off washing over his handsome face. Nick pulled away from her to yank his cock out just in time to deposit his hot cum across her tummy. Until that very second, Cali hadn't even thought of protection. Because she and Kevin had been trying to conceive, she wasn't on birth control. She was grateful Nick had kept his wits about him enough to remember to pull out. Adding an unplanned pregnancy by a one-night stand would not be recommended.
Nick flopped next to her on the bed before he reached out to hug her to him. Cali curled against his side, throwing her right leg across his body. They laid locked in their embrace for a long time, each coming down from their high while trying to sort through their complicated emotions. It was in that quiet time, Cali's mind drifted to a thought that took hold and wouldn't let go.
"Nicholas."
"Calista."
"Why did you decide to make love to me?"
His playful chuckle helped relieve some of her fears. "That's a rhetorical question, right? I think the real question is how could I have possibly resisted?"
"But...well... was it because of me or... " She took a deep breath before finishing her worry. "Or did you sleep with me here in Kevin's bed just to get even with him?"
She was on her back in a second with Nick towering over her, his face full of anger. "God-dammit, Cali. I'm not going to let you ruin this moment. What happened between us tonight had nothing to do with Kevin and Roni. They made their choices and they paid for them. You're a gorgeous, intelligent woman and I'm attracted to you. Period."
He looked serious. She wanted so badly to believe him. He eventually got up to grab a towel and glass of water from the bathroom before pulling back the covers and getting them settled in between the cool sheets. Cali couldn't remember ever feeling more contented than she did as Nick's naked body spooned her as they both dozed off to sleep. For the first time since the accident, she fell into a dreamless sleep, free of the haunting nightmares that had been her nightly visitor since her trip to the morgue.
CHAPTER FIVE
Nick woke to the smell of coffee. It took him a few minutes to remember where he was. He reached out to find Cali's side of the bed empty, but discovered the steaming cup of coffee on the bed stand. He could hear the shower running in the connected bathroom.
He'd spent the night making love to Cali in Kevin Bennett's bed. He'd awakened at two in the morning, knowing he should get up to slink home before she awoke. Instead, he had watched her sleeping peacefully in his arms, remembering how fragile she had looked as she'd begged him to stay. At the time he had worried he was staying for all the wrong reasons. He didn't want to use Calista to get even with Kevin. She didn't deserve that.
Now, in the light of day, he knew he was in much greater danger of losing himself to her. He'd like to think this was the beginning of something special, but he feared the ugliness that had brought them together would always be wedged between them. Things were moving too fast and he didn't know how to slow them down without hurting her.
The shower turning off moved him into motion. He got up and scrambled to find his wrinkled clothes on the floor, rushing to throw them back on. He was sitting on the side of the bed, sipping his coffee when she emerged from the bathroom dressed in a casual yoga outfit, her wet hair wrapped in a towel. Calista was a natural beauty. Even with no makeup on, she was breathtaking.
"Good morning, sunshine." He tried to keep his voice lighter than he felt.
"Good morning, Nick. I hope I doctored your coffee the way you like it."
"It's perfect, thanks."
An awkward silence fell. Cali broke the quiet with a request. "I was hoping you could drop me off at my car as you're leaving. I have an appointment with my real estate agent in a couple hours and then need to run a few errands."
Nick picked up on her reluctance to look him in the eye and suspected she was feeling embarrassed by her behavior the night before. He pushed to his feet and took her in his arms. She felt stiff until he stroked her back, letting his hand fall to cup her ass through the thin pants. He liked the feel of her relaxing against him.
He pulled back enough so he could look into her eyes. "How are you doing this morning? Are you feeling okay?"
She hesitated. "I'm fine I guess. I slept better than I have since... well... you know. Thanks for staying. I'm just hoping you don't think badly of me because..."
Nick cut her off with two fingers to her lips. "Shhhh. Don't go there. There's nothing to be embarrassed about, Cali. We are both consenting adults. I care about you."
"Oh thank goodness. I was worried I'd screwed up any chance of being able to help you with Andi. I hate being alone so much and I really am looking forward to being able to spend time with you and your daughter. It's going to help me too."
Nick had forgotten all about that. His face must have projected his concern, because Cali's face paled. "You have changed your mind, haven't you?"
"No. I haven't. It's just... well shit. I don't want Andi to get hurt. She's already lost her mom. If I introduce her to you and she likes you and then..." He stops, unsure how to finish the sentence without hurting Calista.
"...And then you end up regretting last night you'll want to avoid seeing me again."
"I'm not going to regret last night. Ever. But I do worry we're moving too fast and that we're each too emotional to be making smart decisions about new relationships. I'll never forgive myself if I end up hurting you like Kevin did."
Cali wouldn't look him in the eyes and he suspected it was because she agreed with him. He pulled her close, cupping her face to force her to look into his eyes. "Let's just take this one day at a time. Can we do that?"
She smiled a weak smile. "I guess so."
"Great. Now, I'm happy to take you to your car. I need to swing by and pick up Andi at her friend Katie's house and then get her to gymnastics. I know you have errands today, but would you be free to come by for dinner tonight at the house? If you're serious about babysitting with Andi, you two should meet. I'd like her to get comfortable with you before I leave town."
If he'd doubted that she was serious about helping him, his doubts were gone when her face lit up. "I'd love that so much."
Cali's GPS directed her through the winding upscale subdivision lined with million-dollar homes. She was running a few minutes late for dinner with Nick and Andrea. She would have been nervous enough going to their home and meeting Nick's daughter for the first time, but spending the night before with Nick had complicated things. She was grateful he had seemed as if all was okay this morning as he'd driven her back to her car behind the Irish pub, yet she couldn't shake the fear of him having second thoughts about what they'd done as they were apart today.
She pulled into the wide driveway of the two-story brick colonial style home. It was dusk and hard to see the house number, but the front porch lights illuminated as she turned off the engine to let her know Nick was waiting for her.
Nick. Her heart did a little flip-flop as she remembered the intense look in his eyes as he'd made love to her in the middle of the night. Her memories of their passion-filled night felt surreal, as if they were just a dream.
He opened the door as she walked up the sidewalk. She'd been trying to tell herself all day that they'd just comforted each other the night before, but seeing him in his casual jeans and golf shirt waiting for her with a smile had her panties getting damp in a very uncomfortable sort of way.
He leaned in for a quick kiss. "Hey there. I was worried you were having trouble finding us."
"No. I just left a few minutes later than I should have. My trusty GPS got me here just fine."
Once inside, he took her jacket to the coat closet before returning to take her by the hand. "Ready to meet Andi?"
"You bet. Does she know why I'm here?"
"Yes. We've talked about it and she was happy that you weren't like the other nannies she didn't like at all."
"But... does she know who I am?"
He stopped in his tracks, turning towards her. "No. In fact, she doesn't know her mom was in the car with anyone when she died. She just thinks Roni was driving."
"Okay, well I didn't plan on talking about it anyway, but I want to be sure to back up whatever you've told her."
They went through a formal living room and an even more formal dining room before arriving at a large kitchen that opened to a comfortable family room. An oversized TV could be seen throughout the whole space. A young girl with long black hair sat in front of the TV currently playing a Disney movie.
"Andi, I've told you not to sit so close. You're gonna hurt your eyes. Come meet our guest, please."
Andrea listened to her father without complaint, although she approached Cali with apprehension. As she got closer, Cali's heart contracted. She looked so much like her dad it was uncanny. It was easy to see she took after her father more than her mother, which might explain why Roni hadn't bonded with her daughter as much as Nick had. Andrea's black hair and dark eyes were that of a Greek Mikos. She went to her dad and he tucked her under his arm for a hug as he introduced them.
"Cali, I'd like you to meet my Andrea. Andi, this is a friend of mine, Cali Bennett. She's a schoolteacher and loves kids. She's agreed to help us out this week when I have to head up to New York for work. Say hello."
"Hello Mrs. Bennett." The title kicked Cali in the gut. She hadn't been expecting it. Andi made it worse by continuing. "Are you related to the Bennett's my dad works for?"
Cali panicked, unsure how to answer. Nick came to her rescue. "Yes, she's related to them and that's how I met her."
"Cool. Do you have any kids, Mrs. Bennett?"
"Cali. Please, just call me Cali and no, I'm afraid I don't have any kids of my own yet. Maybe one day."
"Do you like Elsa and Anna?"
Nick looked like he was about to apologize, but Cali cut him off. "Of course. I love Frozen. I went to see it in the theater when it came out and even have a copy of my own at my house."
"You do? Really?"
"Really. I have a whole collection of Disney movies. They are some of my favorites."
"Do you have The Little Mermaid, too? That's my other favorite."
"Are you kidding me? That was my favorite when I was your age. No Disney collection is complete without The Little Mermaid."
"Wow. Can I see if you have some movies I might be missing?"
"Sure. Maybe we can watch some new movies you've never seen while your dad is out of town."
"Yippy! Can we Dad? Can I stay up watching movies on a school night?"
Cali grinned as she turned to Nick. "Yeah, Nick. Can we stay up watching movies on a school night?"
Nick chuckled. "Wow, you've been here three minutes and I'm already getting ganged up on by you two. The normal rules apply. You get your homework done in time, then sure. You can watch movies until bedtime. Now, I think we'd better eat dinner before the lasagna burns. Andi, set the table please."
"Okay, Dad."
She skipped off to the kitchen leaving Cali and Nick. He whispered to her. "That went well."
"How could it not? She's perfect, Nick. You must be so proud."
"Wait until you see her in the morning trying to get her out the door to catch the school bus and we'll see what you say then. That's the one thing she got from Roni. They are both the antithesis of morning people."
"Well, if I don't have my coffee, I'm the same so watch out."
He kept his voice down to make sure Andi couldn't hear him. "I don't know. You didn't scare me this morning."
"I was on my best behavior."
Dinner was a fun affair with Nick quizzing Andi and Cali on their Disney trivia. Cali was impressed with how bright and happy Andrea was considering she had just lost her mom a few months before. It was a blessing that she was taking her loss in stride.
Andi's inquiry brought her back to the conversation at hand. "Do you have Hercules in your collection, Cali?"
"Of course. It was always one of my favorites too since my parents are from Greece."
"Wow! My family is from Greece, too. Dad says we're going to go there on vacation one day. Since your family is from there too, maybe you can come with us!"
Cali's stomach churned with a sudden flood of memories that inevitably snuck up on her when she least expected it.
Nick noticed. "Hey, you okay?"
Calista forced a calming breath. Andi couldn't have known that she had accidentally opened a hornet's nest of unpleasant memories. "I'm fine. I was just... I've been to Greece many times. We used to go when I was a kid to visit my grandparents."
Andi had no clue that Calista wanted to change the subject. "That's so exciting. I checked out a library book about Greece. Dad said I needed to study up on it before I go there so I can be his tour guide. Maybe you can be our tour guide."
Cali stammered, "I don't think that's a good idea. I'm sure you'll make a wonderful tour guide."
Andrea let the subject drop and launched herself into her dad's lap for tickles. While father and daughter bonded, Cali fought back tears. She wanted to cry that she was alone – that she didn't have Kevin's child to help her stave off her loneliness now that he was gone. She wanted to cry at the drudged up painful memories of her last visit to her grandparents and how that trip had changed her life forever. She wanted to cry because for the first time since she arrived, she felt like an outsider – like she was intruding on their private family moment.
Nick sensed she was turning melancholy because he lifted Andi to her own feet. "Okay, let's clear the table and then you can finish watching your show before you need to go up and take a shower."
"But Dad, it's Saturday night. It's early!"
"I didn't say you had to go to bed yet."
"Can we play Wii?"
Nick glanced at Cali. "You mind?"
"Not at all. In fact, I'd love to learn."`
The next two hours flew by. Andi dragged Cali up to give her the grand tour of her bedroom and bathroom. After her shower, Cali helped Andi comb out her long, tangled hair, giving her tips on how to keep the tangles down since she had similar hair. They ended the night playing several games on the Wii. Cali may have lost every game, but she couldn't remember having as much fun as she had tonight. She was almost as disappointed as Andi when Nick announced it was Andrea's bedtime.
"But Dad, can't I stay up later tonight? I want to teach Cali how to golf on the Wii."
"I'm sure Cali can wait until next week to learn how to golf on the Wii. You need to get to bed so we can get you up and out to Sunday School in the morning."
Cali was unprepared for Andrea to throw herself into her lap. The goodnight hug the young girl gave her warmed her heart more than she thought possible. Her eyes locked with Nick's behind Andi's back. The smile that lit up his face was anything but parental, reminding her that they would be alone again once his daughter was asleep.
Nick was gone for fifteen minutes putting Andi to bed. Cali used the time to try to sort through her complicated emotions. Spending time with Nick and his daughter had made her own loneliness worse. She knew it was petty and she hated herself when she felt real jealousy that Nick had Andi to help ease the pain from the loss of his wife.
"She's finally down. She was talking a mile a minute about all the things she wants to do with you when I'm out of town. I sure hope you haven't changed your mind."
Nick had gone to the kitchen island and was opening a new bottle of wine. Cali called over to him from the living room couch. "Of course I haven't changed my mind. She's adorable. It'll be nice to have something new to do this week to break the monotony."
An awkward silence descended while Nick poured two glasses of wine before heading over to sit near Calista. He handed her a glass before sitting a few feet away, swinging his body towards her so he could w
atch her as they spoke. She felt self-conscious as they sat silently sipping their wine.
They hadn't talked about the night before yet. Not really. She struggled to start the conversation. "She's really great, Nick. You're so lucky to have her." Okay, so maybe those weren't the right words because she found herself tearing up with unnamed emotion.
"I know. It's a miracle."
"Why do you say that?"
It was Nick's turn to look uncomfortable. He chugged down half of his wine before he continued. "Remember that I wasn't married to Roni when she got pregnant. In fact, we had broken up for several months. I only found out about Andrea when Veronica showed up on my doorstep with a baby in tow. To say I was surprised is an understatement."
"But you decided to marry her anyway?"
"Yeah. It seemed like the right thing to do for everyone involved. I figured we'd settle down. Maybe have a few more kids. Live the dream, you know?"
Cali wasn't sure how to respond. "Some dream. Andi is eight now, right? You decided not to have any more kids after all?"
"I didn't decide that, but Roni apparently did. I thought we were trying. She even had me convinced it was my fault it wasn't working."
"If you read my texts, you know we were trying and couldn't get pregnant either. Seems our spouses had that in common, too."
"I am sorry, Cali. I do feel bad that I read those texts from Kevin." He finished off his wine before continuing. "If it makes you feel better, I think Roni got the last laugh on this one. Last week her OBGYN office called to find out why she had missed her regularly scheduled Depo-Provera shot."
"But... isn't that?"
"Yep. The bitch actually made me feel guilty I couldn't get her pregnant again. I hung up the phone that day a changed man. That's the day I knew my mourning for her was over. It was the day I knew that Andi and I were gonna be better off without her."
The vehemence as he spoke the bitter words shocked Cali. He had been looking away, but turned his eyes to bore into her as he continued with passion. "You may not believe it yet, Cali, but you're gonna be better off without Kevin too. He was a prick. He didn't deserve you."
