I needed him like I needed air.
I returned his kiss with equal fervor, trying to climb him while I was at it. He chuckled against my lips and tried to take back control of me. I was having none of it though. I pulled away and slid to my knees, ignoring the bite of the tile into my skin.
Taking his heavy length in my hand, I brushed my lips against the very tip of him. It brought out one of the sexiest moans I had ever heard. I wish I could say that everything about the blowjob I gave him was a success, but it wasn’t. I had done it, ever. So taking him into my mouth was a shock to my gag reflex when he hit the back of my throat.
He pulled me up and pressed a kiss to my red cheeks. “Relax, princess, we have enough time to hone your skill.”
Before I could protest or apologize, he slid into me. Painfully slow, he moved in and out of my heat. He held my face between his fingers and asked me to open my eyes.
“I want you to see what it is you’re making me feel right now,” he gritted.
I watched him with interest. The corded muscles in his neck, the way he bit down on his lip and the heat in his gaze spurred on my own climax, all while I ignored the latter part of the statement. Right now.
Fuck you, insecurities!
I closed my eyes against his wishes and lost myself in the art of being Dasher’s.
“You cannot just say Dasher and I had sex and then completely check out of the group chat!” Olivia exclaimed as we sat in the middle of a high-end hotel which provided high tea.
I never understood the need these girls had for having these things. Katya told me to suck it up. It was an adult version of a dress-up tea party.
“I don’t get why I had to wear my best dress and come all the way to the Upper East Side,” I rolled my eyes as I eyed a few of the debutante looking women who ate finger sandwiches and drank from tiny cups.
My fingers clenched wishing to wrap themselves around a double cheeseburger.
“It is a defining moment in your life!” Katya exclaimed pushing her ringlets behind her ears. “You have finally moved on from Holden!”
I winced. “I wouldn’t say it like that.”
“Aria Thorne!” Olivia snapped. “There is no way in hell that you can possibly not be over Holden the asshole.”
“It’s not a switch you can turn off,” I frowned and sipped on my tea. Damn, I felt so pretentious.
“Well,” Katya quipped. “At least you found someone to sort out the plumbing of you unused pipe.”
I spat my tea across my scone and soaked my tissue. “What?”
I looked around to see if anyone had overheard the conversation. Olivia was trying really hard not to shriek with laughter as she usually does. I glared at Katya.
"Seriously, I was thinking of buying you a vibrator," she shrugged. "It's a double penetration one too. I have it on my wishlist, I'll even show you!"
She began taking out her phone when I threw my napkin at her. “Behave!”
She grinned. “I am serious though.”
“Shut the fuck up,” I growled.
“Ladies,” the waitress frowned down at us. “Your eats.”
She laid out our finger foods and took away the trash and empty dishes before throwing one more look of disdain and heading off.
We all burst into a round of laughter with tears dripping from our eyes for real.
"On a serious note, though," Olivia said after we got ourselves under control. "Don't ruin something that could be really beautiful by focusing on getting over Holden. Instead, focus on getting to know Dasher."
“How are you going to deal with the whole deejay thing?” Katya asked.
I looked at my gorgeous friend. I tilted my head to the side, not understanding. "What do you mean?"
“Sorry, babe, but she’s right,” Olivia said. Her sharp eyes not missing a beat as it tracked my every feature. “You are one of the most protective and territorial people we know. How are you going to handle all the girls that throw themselves at him at the club?”
My fork stayed midair on my plate and it felt like my Swiss Roll lodged itself in an awkward part of my windpipe.
I swallowed hard and sipped my tea. “I don’t know. I mean we only had sex and today is like the first day.”
“I like how you say we only had sex,” Katya snorted, her exotic features twisted into a confused smile. “There was a time when having sex was considered the last and final step.”
“Yeah,” I shrugged. “We are not in those times anymore I guess.”
“I’m not judging,” Katya smiled. “I’m the last one to talk.”
We lapsed into silence as we finished off our high tea. My nerves were shot as I thought constantly about the fact that Dasher was always surrounded by women and the fast life. I wasn’t really the fast life type, except when I had my moments of weakness and I needed to forget myself.
A while later the girls dropped me off at the apartment, as I got out, Olivia and Katya both hooted for me to stop.
Olivia stuck her head out of the window. “You know we are really proud of you, even if you seem like you aren’t really moving on, right?”
I pasted a fake smile that I prayed they could not see from so far. “I know. Love you.”
“We love you too,” they both shouted and drove off.
The walk back to the apartment was long and quiet my mind continuously flashed to what they had mentioned at the tea. Holden was handsome. There was no denying that. Him behaving like he was single throughout those three years of us being together was the hardest part of the whole relationship. I constantly watched other girls flirt with him and even though he wouldn’t flirt back at the time, the fact that he gave off the vibe in order to attract that kind of attention, was what made me most insecure.
I think back to a time when he supposedly put a status on his social media for me. It simply said: missing my someone special. I hadn't seen it, but he said he had to take it out before his mom saw it. Part of me wonders whether he had put it up and then realized that I would see it because part of me wondered whether or not that status was really for me.
Dasher was literally the life of the party. I noticed the girls that lined up to take photographs with him. I often sat next to him as random girls texted him. Some used an excuse for wanting VIP passes and others used the videos he put up on Instagram as a starter for a conversation.
I sighed. I needed to give him a chance. I needed to see whether this was going to work. This was only the first day and apart from shower sex and breakfast, we hadn’t spent any other couple time. I pasted on my smile and stepped into the apartment…
Only to be faced with an emotional Paisley on kneeling before Dasher who sat on the couch watching her.
Guess history always repeats itself.
Chapter Seventeen
Dasher
I wanted to rise from the couch and assure Aria that nothing was at it seemed. It wasn’t. That was the truth. I remained seated with a look of disgust as I watched Paisley practically beg me to give her another chance. Really?
She glanced up as Aria stepped in and immediately shuffled to her feet. She was dressed in a red and black plaid dress which was a stark contrast to Aria’s sky blue dress. It was almost like the two of them swapped roles.
I thought Paisley stood as some sort of act of pride. I assumed she did not want Aria to see her at what I believed to be her most pathetic state, but no. She got even more pathetic.
Paisley ran forward and grabbed a startled Aria’s hands in both of her own. Paisley’s dark hair was neatly plaited while Aria’s blonde hair was windblown. Aria was shorter yet still more elegant while Paisley looked like a harassed intern from a corporate firm. Oh wait, she was one.
I wondered briefly at which part of me decided that dating this girl again was a good idea. I knew Paisley to be pushy when she didn't get her way. In fact, in the beginning, she was the sweetest thing since honey. I did not realize that she could sting like the bees that made them.
“Aria,” she sniffled. “Make him understand.”
“Understand what?” Aria’s voice was cold, robotic.
“He and I are destined to be together,” she insisted. “He knows this. We are a better match. I am required to stand next to him. His family accepts me.”
Aria looked up at me. I still refused to move or react. I know I should have. I know Aria isn’t Paisley and I know she had much deeper seated issues than the crazy woman in front of her, but I just could not move from the scene before me.
“Paisley,” Aria sighed. “Your love is not supposed to feel like a chore or a society approved move. It is supposed to be about how much the two of you care about each other, find that and fight for that. I cannot tell him to be with you. You need to show him why he should be with you.”
With those parting words, the girl who haunted my mind for months walked slowly down the passage of the home she opened up to me and slowly shut her door. Never once did she slam it.
I looked up at a confused Paisley and let out a sarcastic laugh. "You do not realize what just happened, do you?"
I stood and slid my hands deep into the pockets of my jeans. I felt my hair flop over my eyes, I wasn’t in the mood to flip it over though.
“Last night,” I looked directly into her eyes. “Aria and I had sex.”
Paisley sucked in a breath and tears brimmed in her eyes.
“This morning, we decided that we were going to give a relationship a chance,” I smiled when I remembered how unsure my princess was. “Today, she came to her home and found you begging for me to take you back.”
I walked closer to her. “Instead of gloating that she had me or instead of creating a scene with me which she should have, she gave you advice and then shut herself in her room.”
“She decided to give us a chance to talk and maybe work things out, which could’ve hurt her,” I raised my brows. “In fact, I bet my life that she is hurting right now.”
My gut clenched at that thought. It felt really new.
“I am asking you to leave,” I gestured at the door with a nod of my head, “because I would like to go and comfort my girl.”
“Dasher,” the tears fell down her face and her lips were wet and red.
“I’m being serious, Paisley,” I sighed. “I started seeing you so that I didn’t have to admit that I wanted her. I started seeing you because I knew you were working for my brother. I started seeing you because I was bored. That was harsh, but it was all me, you need to leave.”
Paisley shook her head with a cynical smile ghosting her perfect lips. “You think it is going to be easy, Dash?”
I glanced at her with a questioning look.
“I was with you for two years before Emma died,” she said, ignoring my flinch she made her way towards the door. “One day, you’re gonna have to accept the real reason why you had to end things with me, and it had nothing to do with me being pushy. Call me when she runs screaming.”
The slam of the front door rattled my heart and made me light headed. There were still some secrets I preferred to keep to myself. There were still nights when I woke up with the need to maim something. There were still many nights ahead, nights I wanted to prevent Aria from.
I looked at her closed door. A gentleman would leave her alone. Someone who really cared about her would turn the other way.
I pushed my fingers through my hair and took the walk down the passage. Aria deserved more than me. She deserved someone that was whole enough to mend her. I wasn’t that guy.
I turned the knob slowly and stepped in. The sight that greeted me broke my heart. She stood in front of the mirror, naked, and her insecure eyes tracked every feature of her body. She cupped her small breasts. There was nothing sexual about it because the look in her eyes was one of hatred. She glanced at my reflection in her mirror.
“I have never realized why it was that guys never wanted me,” she spoke softly as if those people would hear her. “I thought I had a good enough personality, I know my body isn’t all curves and lust, but I thought I was pretty enough.”
I wanted to tell her that she was beautiful and her personality was slightly titled but it was what made her appealing.
“Now I realize, it’s just me.”
I stripped my shirt off and shucked my jeans and boxers. Her eyes tracked down my body on the reflection of her mirror, but that was all. She didn’t move. Her head remained tilted and her eyes remained tear-filled.
I stood behind her and left a sliver of space between our bodies. Her body naturally swayed back against mine. The heat from both our bodies created the illusion of lust when in fact, there was so much more going on at that moment.
I lifted both my hands and touched the tips of my fingers to her shoulders. She shivered at my touch.
"You have no idea what you do to me, do you?" I whispered against her hair. The tip of my hard-on lay against the curve of her ass. "I think you should know since you can feel it."
She looked at me, still no reaction.
“I fantasized about you when I first realized that I wanted to be more than just your roommate,” I touched my lips to the spot on her neck that made her melt. My fingers trailed down her arms raising the fine hair as they went.
"The day I knew I wanted you, was when I saw you in the bathroom," I grinned and bit at the top of her lobe. "You were in your own head and you were breaking and yet you let me sit with you."
My fingers twined with hers at her sides and then I moved both our hands.
“I had never seen someone look so beautiful and broken at the same time.”
I dragged our hands up her flat stomach and used them to knead her breasts. “You look at these as if they did something wrong to you by not being bigger, and yet, when I feel them in my hand all I can think is mine.”
I feel her inhale. I slide our hands back down her stomach. “I want to spend hours kissing every inch of skin on your body.”
I cupped her most sensitive place. I breathed heavily as I watched her chest rise and fall. Her eyes finally filled with the lust I was looking for. I used her fingers and mine to slowly rock in and out of her moist heat.
She was a vision. Her hips undulated as she moved to the rhythm she wanted.
“I don’t give a fuck about what you thought other guys wanted,” I growled in her ear as she started getting wild beneath our fingers. “All I care is who you are for me. You are mine now, Aria. That means there is no such thing as worrying about other guys. I chose you.”
She exploded with a delicious moan on her tongue. I lifted her by her slim waist and tossed her onto her bed. Before she could scramble up I dove between her legs and sucked her core until I felt her legs try to twist around my body, trying to push me away and keep me there at the same time.
It was raw. It was passionate. It was brutal.
I turned her flat onto her stomach and gripped her hips to pull her ass against my cock. I slid in effortlessly and powered into her like no man’s business. All that could be heard was the sound of our ragged breathing and the slap of skin on skin. It was euphoric.
I emptied myself inside of her and collapsed on the bed next to her. Aria breathed heavily as she looked at me, fear filled her eyes.
“What’s wrong?” I frowned.
“You didn’t use a condom.”
Chapter Eighteen
Aria
I was tense that entire week even though I maintained a somewhat normal attitude in front of Dasher. I did not expect to see that side of him. It wasn’t bad or anything, but seeing him take control and own my body the way he did, to the point where he literally forgot about a condom, that scared me.
The day after that I ran to the pharmacy and got onto birth control. There was no way that I was going to handle bringing a child into the world, as much as I wanted one. Dasher seemed to think it was all going to be okay.
We were at Parker's home in Sunnyside. It was Sophia's fourth birthday. She looked like Moana. The small home was
decorated to create an illusion of an island. Clay, big massive Clay, was dressed as Maui. It was hilarious and humbling to see. Some of Parker's workers from his garage were there, the extended family of friends that Dasher was part of was also there. Leo and the girls stopped by to give Sophia gifts.
“So the two of you look all lovey-dovey,” Leo nudged me as we sat on one of the benches far enough away from the party.
The kids on the jumping castle made me really nervous. It was as if one of them were going to bounce out of the castle itself and hit the floor. I know it seemed like a weird thought, but it was why I hardly ever went anywhere near jumping castles.
“We decided to try taking things to the dating stage,” I shrugged. I wore a half-top with high-waisted jeans and my hair was pulled away from my face in a high messy bun.
Leo grinned. He really looked handsome when he did that. “I told you there was something there.”
I nudged him. “Take your I told you so one-liners and sit somewhere else."
We laughed and shot the shit for a bit before I caught a glimpse of a frowning Dasher heading our way.
“Uh oh,” Leo coughed. “That’s my cue.”
I squinted at Leo. “Where are you going?”
“I don’t particularly want to be punched,” Leo saluted me and disappeared into the crowd.
Dasher appeared looking like a troubled Norse God. He dressed in a tank and jeans, his muscles were on full display. He had two plates of food in his hands and handed me one.
“Thanks,” I muttered. “Why do you look so mad?”
“What did Leo want?” he asked, which I took as an answer to my question.
"We were just talking," I shrugged and dug into my plate of steak, potato salad, and veggies.
“I saw,” he shook his head and dug in.
I stopped with a stupid grin on my face. “Are you jealous?”
He narrowed his eyes at me playfully. “Do I need to be?”
The Wreck of Our Hearts Page 12
