I sobered up and stared at him earnestly. “Never. I would never be with you if I wanted to mess around with anyone else.”
He gripped the back of my neck and massaged it as he caught my gaze with his. “Same. We are with each other, there isn’t room for anyone else. If I ever feel like I want out or want someone else, we will talk it out first.”
Outwardly, I smiled at him. Inside, I died. Holden and I had this conversation before. I asked him to always be honest with me. I had asked him to let me know the minute he realizes he wanted someone else. I told him to give me a head’s up, and I even vowed that I would disappear from his life if he found someone else.
I was the only one who kept up with my promise.
"There you two lovebirds are," Piper gushed.
Piper was a gorgeous dark-haired blue-eyed woman who was a year or so older than I was. She had the most caring and inviting personality I had ever come across. She owned her own salon and many people traveled even from the Upper East Side to get their hair done by her.
I often wondered why she was still single. In fact, looking at Parker, I wondered why they were both still single.
“Hey Piper,” Dasher smiled at her. “The food is amazing!”
“It really is,” I piped in.
“Listen,” she twisted her fingers together. “So, Leo told me about the rebranding you did for his club. I was wondering if you could do the same with my salon.”
I blinked at her for a few minutes until Dasher nudged me with a proud smile on his face.
“If you can’t, I understand—”
“NO!” I shouted. “Sorry, I’m just surprised is all. I would love to!”
“I’m willing to pay you for it,” she said in all seriousness. “In fact, I insist I pay for your services.”
“I wouldn’t even know how much to charge you,” I looked at her with honesty.
“So start your research, princess, it seems like business is booming,” Dasher grinned at me.
“I will keep in touch, Piper,” I answered her with an excited smile. “Just drop me an email with pictures and your ideas. I will get to work on it.”
“Thank you, Aria!” she reached forward and hugged me tightly.
After she skipped off, Dasher grinned at me. “Look at you coming up in the world.”
I smiled and placed a soft kiss on his lips. “Thank you, the fact that you believe in me keeps me going.”
He captured my lips in a fierce kiss and for a little while everything seemed right in the world.
Dasher
Travis sat across me at the hotel restaurant. I did not want to be here but I felt like it wasn't, I'd just find him on my doorstep. Something told me that if Travis met Aria properly, he would try his most conniving tactics and steal her away from me.
I was growing rather attached to her and the feelings of possessiveness scared me at times too.
Travis looked different. In fact, he looked more like me. His light hair was disheveled, he wore a black t-shirt and he even had jeans, although designer, still, the fact that he was sans suit set me on edge.
“Why are you dressed like that?” I frowned as I bit into the bagel.
He shrugged. “Got some business out of the city.”
“So why did you want to meet?”
He watched me for a few minutes before his face resembled the brother I knew back when our mother was alive. It threw me for a loop.
“I need you to understand that some things are going to be said in the media,” he sighed. “The truth about Emmaline may or may not come out.”
I clenched the fork in my fist. “Are you fucking kidding me? After two whole fucking years, why now?”
“Because, it needs to,” he said to me, using his eyes more than his voice to implore me. “You need to let whatever is being said, be said. You cannot and will not change the narrative. Do you understand me?”
“What is going on, Travis?” I asked. “All hatred aside, what the hell is going on with you?”
Travis schooled his features. “Like I said, I’m going out of town and shit might hit the fan. I want you to stay out of it.”
“You can’t ask me to stay out of something that has to do with Emma.”
Travis stood and threw a one-hundred-dollar bill on the table and shrugged into a leather jacket. “I’m not asking, Dasher, I am telling you to stay out of it.”
I watched with my jaw clenched as my brother left me there with a one-hundred-dollar bill and questions filtering my mind.
They hurt me, Travis. I hear the haunting broken voice of Emma. She told Travis everything she went through before he had disappeared that night.
They touched me where they were not supposed to. She had broken at the point.
Travis had held onto Emma and looked at me with blank eyes. I remember standing there and looking at my sister's broken body in his arms. She was bruised so badly that I wanted to die right alongside her. Her dark hair was tangled in his arm and her nails were broken from where I was sure she tried to fight them off.
I sped down the Brooklyn Bridge in the TT. Once again, I knew I was going to spiral. I knew I was going to do something destructive. The tires screeched as I parked outside the apartment. I stormed up the stairs and threw open the door. Aria was startled as she made something or another on the counter.
"Hey? Are you okay?" her large blue eyes were confused and worried about me.
I, on the other hand, felt disconnected. "You remember when we first met, you told me you wouldn't judge me?"
She moved away from the cup but did not step towards me. The darkness inside me reared its ugly head. A chase sounded really good about now.
“Yeah?” she was unsure but I saw the determination in her eyes. She would do whatever I wanted her to do. I smirked at that. That smirk had her swallowing.
"Well, I need you now, no judgment."
“You have me.”
“No,” I shook my head. “I’m not going to see you. You need to understand that. I am not going to see you.”
I saw her frown, but her resolve was cemented. She wasn’t going to back out. First mistake, princess.
“Its fine,” she shrugged. “Do what you need.”
I stalked forward, gripped her hair and wrenched her head backward. She gasped and tears brimmed in her eyes. “You can back out.”
“No,” she said as a tear fell down her cheek.
I licked it up and dragged her down the hall to my bedroom. I stripped off my clothes and waited with a raised brow and crossed arms as she hesitantly did the same. I pushed her down on the bed and nestled between her legs.
I wasn't seeing her. I saw darkness. I saw my sister broken and bloody. I saw those motherfuckers. I powered into Aria. I felt her beneath me, crying and jerking with my every thrust. I wanted to stop or to go gently with her. I couldn't. I needed this.
I circled her throat with my hands and pressed down. Her eyes bulged as I rocked in and out of her fiercely.
“Dasher,” she gasped.
I was too far gone to realize exactly why she was calling out my name. I felt her climax flood my cock which spurred on my own release. I let go of her neck and looked down at her.
Her eyes were red and her face streaked with tears. I saw the red bruising of my fingers on her throat. I expected her to get furious or to slap me or do anything other than reach up and push my hair away from my face and look at me with understanding.
I collapsed onto her, my face in her neck as I sobbed.
Chapter Nineteen
Dasher
When I woke the next morning, I was surprised to see Aria in my t-shirt standing by my DJ mixer. I turned over and watched her squint at the different dials and the performance pad. I could see that she wanted to press one of the colorful buttons. She looked my way and did a double take when she realized that I lay with my hand behind my head and watched her.
She gave me a sheepish smile. “Sorry, I was curious.”
I was about to say something wh
en I caught a glimpse of the marks around her neck. “I’m really sorry about last night.”
She shrugged. “Sometimes you like to get kinky.”
“No,” I shook my head and sat up. Her eyes flitted to my semi, making it a full-on erection. “You cannot make excuses for what I did.”
“Hey, you won’t get away with it again,” she said with a hand on her hip. “If I can’t handle it, I will let you know.”
I looked at the blush on her cheeks and grinned. “You liked it, didn’t you?”
She looked away and bit her lip. She touched the tip of her finger to the turntable. I slid from the bed and stood directly behind her. I pressed my body against her back, something I seemed to be doing a lot with her. It is rather addictive, the way our bodies curve together so automatically.
I flicked on the switch of the mixer. I watched her eyes light up with fascination. My heart melted and my cock hardened simultaneously. “You wreck me, Aria.”
Without waiting for a response, I powered on my laptop and selected a song. I used her fingers to show her the different techniques. Her laughter and excited demeanor when we used the performance pad were infectious. Right then and there, I created a mix just for her. Her breathing deepened as I showed her the scratch technique.
“Your hands,” she rested her head against my shoulder. I pressed a kiss to her cheek. “Your hands are incredible. The way you move and the way you put your whole body into the art of creating your music… it’s inspiring.”
I slid my hands off the mixer and chose a random sexy track from the laptop. I turned her around and placed her on the floor speaker. I turned up the bass. I lifted the t-shirt off her and slid into her wet heat easily. It was awkward considering I had to squat a bit to properly fuck her, but as soon as the bass kicked in, I watched her face transform into utter bliss as the vibrations rocketed through her body and to an extent, mine.
I was starting to fall for this girl. I knew nothing was going to save me now.
Aria
My body still tingled from our session that morning as I awkwardly sat on my chair. Luckily it was cold today, so having a scarf on wasn’t weird. I honestly was afraid when I saw the uncontrolled madness in his eyes. I knew him to be a helpful and sometimes cold person, never unhinged that way.
I had a feeling it had to do with his family. That was a topic I was not going to get into.
My cell lit up with a call from Jett. He was someone I referred to as a best friend. We knew each other for more than ten years and to this day, we randomly check in with each other. I was surprised to hear from him today considering we hadn’t communicated in a while.
"Hey?" I answered as I tapped away on my laptop. "What's up?"
“Not much,” he answered with a smile. I could hear the happiness in his voice. He was one of those few who actually deserved all the good things in the world. “I was just checking in, seeing how things are going after…”
“Holden?” I asked with a chuckle.
“You can say his name now?” I heard Jett’s astonished voice. “Have aliens taken over your body?”
“I just… I’m working on it,” I looked at the empty space in front of me.
“That’s a start,” then he gasped. “Wait, did you meet someone else?”
“What makes you think that?” I asked evasively, feeling guilty that I hadn’t told him about Dasher.
“I can hear it in your voice, dumbass, so who is it?”
I launched into a conversation about Dasher. It felt good to finally have someone to talk about. Those butterflies in my stomach that I had never felt in such a long time reared to the surface.
“You’re in love.”
I froze. “No.”
“Yup,” he said with conviction. “I know you better than anyone out there, that tone in your voice? You’re in love with him.”
I felt cold and my heart beat fast. “I can’t fall in love again, Jett. I can’t go through that pain again.”
“What makes you think that it is going to be painful?”
“Because this time, he mended me,” I whispered with tears in my eyes. “Dasher mended the broken parts of me and if he leaves, I will shatter this time beyond repair.”
“Don’t think of it that way,” Jett admonished. “You need to stop playing the victim card. If your heart breaks, then it breaks. Get back up and move on, try again. Keep trying until you know you are physically and mentally done.”
“I hate that you are right,” I sighed after a few minutes of processing what he had to say.
“No, you hate that I’m voicing everything you already thought about.”
“GIVE IT UP FOR DJ DASH!”
An alarm sounded which was Dasher’s intro. I found it hilarious but it got the crowd screaming. I listened to his hypnotic beats as I powered through my work. Once his set was done we would head home together. It felt so very domesticated.
I grabbed my stuff after the hour was done and headed out to the back entrance of the club. I leaned against the wall and watched as he packed up his stuff and then my smile dropped when I watched the horde of women rush to surround him.
There were pictures being taken. His hand around the waist of the one girl pissed me off. She was gorgeous. Too gorgeous for my liking. Big boobs, curvy body, and skimpy dress, someone perfect for him. I spun away and headed to the TT. I dragged in a breath of the fresh air and tried to clear my head.
It was part of his job. I had to deal with it. He was just taking photos. He wasn’t going to leave me for one of them. It was fine. We were fine.
Fuck.
I was a mess. The tears rolled down my cheeks rapidly as I remembered I had the keys to the car. I struggled to get the car unlocked.
“Easy, princess, we’re leaving,” Dasher chuckled until he saw my face. “What the fuck happened?”
I closed my eyes. “It’s nothing, can we go?”
“No,” he clenched his fists. “I’m not leaving until you tell me who the hell made you cry this way?”
He looked livid. He hated anyone hurting me. It became apparent over the weeks that we were together. I had no idea how to explain to him that I couldn’t change my insecurities. Holden ruined me.
“It’s you.”
He looked at me with confusion. A random girl bounded up as we had a stare down and she grabbed him around the waist.
“Dasher!” she shrieked. “I loved your set tonight.”
He immediately wiped the strained look from his face and turned to her with a smile. “Thank you.”
“I totally lost myself in the music tonight! You really know how to get the crowd hot.”
I clenched my eyes shut and slid into the passenger’s side of the car. I waited until he was done with the girl’s gushing and then he slid into the driver’s side. He drove slowly and I felt his gaze on me at random moments.
He parked at what seemed to be our spot. Brooklyn Bridge was busy tonight, a few cars honked at us as he pulled the car over to the side. I closed my eyes and tried to will the tears away but they fell aimlessly.
“This is part of my job, Aria,” he sighed, clenching the steering wheel. “I cannot help who comes up to me and what they say to me.”
I sniffed. “I know. Deep down and logically, I know. The broken part of me though, that part can’t understand.”
“I won’t do to you what he did, Aria.”
He turned to face me. “I need to know if this is going to be a deal breaker, because if it is—”
“Then what?” I asked with anger. “You’re gonna leave me because I feel a little jealous of all the women around you?”
“No, we could work on it,” he said slowly.
"I'm not a song, Dasher, you can't edit out the parts you don't like and put your own spin on it."
“Aria,” he shook his head. “Jesus, I did not mean that. I feel like we’ve fought more than anything else since we decided to get together.”
“I can’t help it,” I whined. Literal
ly, I whined. This moment took me back to Jett’s word. You need to stop playing the victim card.
Dasher said nothing more and instead, he started the car. When we reached the apartment we both went into our own rooms. The doors shut, and there were no goodnight kisses.
Chapter Twenty
Aria
Here's the truth. I tried. I tried every single day to forget Holden. He had no need to be in my head. It was almost a year later since he left me. I should have been over it. I've seen people move on in less time. I needed to be that person.
Dasher was a great guy and losing the time that I could enjoy with him seemed like a stupid thing to do for someone who had obviously moved on. I sat in Starbucks. I hated that I had to go through the trouble of unblocking him. I needed to put it all to rest though, and there was no other way for me to move on.
Holden looked amazing as usual. My heart skipped a little at the sight of him. The scruff on his face made me melt a little. I watched the cockiness in his stride and the smirk on his face as if he knew I would eventually cave.
Dasher was so fucking mature compared to Holden. Amazingly enough, Dasher was younger than Holden.
I waited for him to sit. He seemed a little taken aback that I hadn’t stood up to greet him or anything. I looked at him and sighed.
“Hi,” he said with a smile.
I nodded. “I didn’t call you to reminisce or anything.”
His smile dropped and he leaned forward. “Are we going to go through how much of a coward you think I am and how much you hate me?”
He had the nerve to roll his eyes and it caused me to chuckle. “I wanted to. I wanted to run through the list of how badly you hurt me. I wanted to rail at you for choosing her over me. I wanted to scream and plead and ask why she deserved all the things that I begged you for, for three years.”
“She fits into my life, Aria,” he sighed. He looked down.
“And that is why I decided not to,” I answered him. “I met someone, I think I might even be in love with him.”
The Wreck of Our Hearts Page 13
