by Lydia Rose
“Are you falling in love with her again?”
Beth didn’t expect Ann to ask her that and she sat silently.
“Are you there?”
“Yeah, I’m here.” Beth took a breath. “I love, Ryan, but I wouldn’t say I’m in love with her.”
“Are you sure? You two sound like your relationship is back where it used to be all those years ago.”
“I really enjoy Ryan’s company. When she was on top of me and she looked at me.” Beth paused for courage. “I thought she was going to kiss me.”
“OMG. Were you disappointed that she didn’t?” Ann asked excited. “Be honest.”
“Kind of.”
“That’s it. You’re in love with her again.” Ann began to giggle. “You just can’t resist that woman. It doesn’t matter that you can’t remember your relationship. You two are obviously meant to be together.” Ann lowered her voice. “You are her soulmate and obviously she’s yours.”
“You’re nuts, Ann.”
“Keep telling yourself that, but I know you two are meant to be together.”
“Do me a favor, don’t say anything to mom.” Beth begged.
“I won’t. I’ll wait until you are back together again,” Ann said laughing.
“It’s not going to happen, Ann. Ryan is dating a very nice woman. I think she likes her a lot.”
“We’ll see, Liz.”
****
Ryan walked up to Lori’s door and knocked. “Hi,” she said when the door opened.
“Please come in,” Lori said avoiding Ryan’s attempt to kiss her.
“Are you okay?” Ryan asked as she followed Lori into the kitchen.
“I’m fine.” She answered coldly. Lori put the plates on the table and looked at Ryan. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with Elizabeth.”
Ryan shrugged. “It’s just been dinner and TV.”
Lori narrowed her eyes. “Are you in love with her?”
Ryan didn’t immediately answer. “What?”
“It’s a simple question, Ryan.”
“It’s complicated, Lori.”
Lori pushed her plate away. “Complicated. Yeah, I’ve heard that before. I won’t even bring up the fact that she had been dating a man because I know how that can change.”
“Lori, don’t get so excited. Let me explain, please.” Ryan told Lori how she and Beth fell in love when they were kids and how Beth lost her memory.
“That’s even worse than I thought. She’s the woman that broke your heart and you are still hung up on her.”
“No I’m not.”
“Why would you hang around with her? If Melanie and Stacy broke up, do you think I would allow Melanie and me to be friends again?” Lori’s anger was evident on her red face.
“It’s different with Beth. She doesn’t remember breaking my heart. Beth didn’t fall out of love with me.” Ryan sighed. “Beth just forgot she loved me.” She tried to defend herself without causing Lori more pain and anger.
Lori sat back in her chair and crossed her arm over her chest. “I think you and I should take a break. You have to decide if you want to have her in your life or me.”
“That’s not fair, Lori. Beth is my friend.”
“Yeah, just like Stacy was Melanie’s friend.” Lori stood up. “I think you should leave, Ryan.”
“I don’t understand why you are so upset, Lori, but I will give you some time. Good night.”
Lori closed the door without another word.
“That went well,” Ryan mumbled under her breath. “I give up with trying to understand women.” She continued to mumble as she walked to her car.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
For the next week Ryan avoided any contact with Beth and she never heard from Lori either. Sitting in her office, Hanna knocked on the door frame. Ryan looked up and forced a smile. “Hi, Hanna. Do you need something?”
“I’m good, boss. How are you doing?”
“I’m okay, Hanna.”
“Your mouth might be saying that, but your eyes aren’t. You’ve been moping around here and I know something is bothering you.” Hanna sat in a chair. “Did you and Lori have a fight?”
“A fight?” Ryan chuckled. “No, she just decided that we needed a break.”
“What did you do?” Hanna asked with a smirk.
“Lori thinks I have feelings for someone else. Which I don’t. She wants me to cut a good friend out of my life and I wouldn’t do it.”
“You mean, Elizabeth Hale?” Hanna asked smiling.
Ryan’s head shot up. “What do you mean?”
“I see the way you look at her.” Hanna leaned over the desk. “More important, I see the way she looks at you.”
“There’s nothing going on between us.”
“I know there isn’t. If there was, you would be walking around with a big goofy grin on your face.”
Ryan’s jaw dropped. She opened her mouth to speak, but Hanna held up her hand.
“Admit it, Ryan. You like her. She likes you. So what’s the problem?” Hanna asked trying to understand.
“She doesn’t like me that way.” Ryan admitted to Hanna what happened all those years ago.
“She may not remember you from way back, but she’s fallen in love with you again.”
“I don’t think so. She’s been dating men for the last eight years.”
“Yeah and are any of those men still around?”
Ryan shook her head. “I rest my case. Go after the girl, boss.” Hanna walked out of Ryan’s office and went back to her desk.
Ryan looked at the clock on the wall and knew she needed a cup of coffee. She walked into the cafeteria and grabbed her coffee. She turned around and saw Beth sitting at a table smiling at her. Ryan held up her coffee in a wave and went out the door. Before Ryan walked out the door, she saw the smile leave Beth’s face. Walking toward the stairs, Ryan stopped in her tracks. Why are you cutting her out of your life? This is exactly what Lori wanted you to do and you refused to do that. Ryan turned around and stood next to Beth’s table.
“Hi, Beth.” Ryan watched as the smile on her face returned. “Would you go to dinner with me Friday night?”
Beth nodded. “I’d like that, Ryan.”
“Seven o’clock?”
Beth’s smile broadened. “It’s a date,” she said with a giggle.
Ryan couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “I, uh. I’m sorry, but I have to get back to work. See you Friday night.” Ryan rushed out of the room.
****
Ryan spent the rest of the week wondering if Beth really meant that Friday night was an actual date. All she knew was in a couple of hours, she would find out. Before she got to her apartment, she heard her phone chime. Looking at the screen she read what was written.
“How should I dress for this date?”
Ryan read and reread the screen. “She called it a date again,” she said to the empty car. Ryan typed. “That black dress would be nice.”
“How do you know about that dress???” Beth typed.
“How do you explain that one?” Ryan typed. “I saw you leave on a date one evening while I was walking to my car.”
“See you later.”
Since Ryan told Beth to dress up, she hoped she could compete with that tiny black dress. The restaurant she was taking Beth to was a suggestion of Hanna. She told Ryan the food was phenomenal and they had these large booths that would give them plenty of privacy. Ryan put on her black dress slacks, white satin button down shirt, boots and a leather blazer. Looking at herself in the mirror she wondered if it was good enough. “Well, it will have to do,” she said before grabbing her keys.
The door opened to Beth’s apartment before Ryan could knock. “You look fantastic,” Beth said checking Ryan out without embarrassment.
“You always look beautiful, Beth,” Ryan said stepping into the apartment.
“So you saw me one night, huh?” Beth asked with a grin.
“Yeah. I wasn’t stalk
ing you or anything.” Ryan could feel her face flush. “Are you ready to go?”
“I just have one question?” Beth asked.
“What about Lori?”
“We’re on a break.” Ryan answered staring at the floor.
“What is this Friends and she’s Rachel Greene?” Beth asked laughing.
Ryan got the reference and laughed too. “More liked Emily in wanting me to turn my back on my friend.”
Beth looked at Ryan. “She wanted you to stop seeing me?”
Ryan shrugged. “I would never do that, Beth.”
“You are something else, Ryan.” Beth put her jacket on and put her hand through Ryan’s arm. “Shall we go?”
Ryan opened the door and they stepped into the hallway. She opened the car door for Beth when they reached the car.
“Thank you,” Beth said smiling up at Ryan.
Ryan got into the car and drove to the restaurant.
“Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.” Ryan answered with a grin.
“Okay. I can wait.”
They pulled up to the valet and he opened Beth’s door. The valet handed Ryan her ticket. Beth took Ryan’s arm again as they walked to the hostess.
“Allen,” Ryan said.
“Yes.” She looked at Ryan and then at Beth. “Your table is ready. Please follow me.”
The hostess led them to the type of booth Hanna had explained to her and they both sat down.
“I’ve never been here, but I’ve heard about this restaurant. How did you hear about it?”
“Hanna.”
“She has very good taste,” Beth said as she placed the napkin on her lap.
They were perusing the menu when the waiter approached. “Can I start you off with something to drink?”
“I think we should decide on our meal before we choose,” Ryan said. “Can you tell us about the specials?”
They both ordered a special and then ordered a bottle of white wine. Beth tried to look at the restaurant, but they were so secluded she didn’t see much.
“This is very cozy,” she said.
“Hanna said the booths here give you plenty of privacy.”
“Do we need privacy?” Beth asked smiling.
“Uh,” Ryan said stumbling what to say.
Beth giggled. “I’m just teasing you Ryan. This is very romantic.”
Ryan wanted to ask what was going on. Did Beth get her memory back? The waiter interrupted her thoughts. He poured them each a glass of wine and added the appetizer to the middle of the table.
“This is delicious,” Beth said taking a bite of the crabmeat.
Ryan took a deep breath and asked. “Beth, did you. I mean did you get your memory back?”
Beth put down her fork. “No, Ryan, I didn’t.”
Ryan sat back in her seat feeling dejected.
“That doesn’t mean that I don’t know what you meant to me all those years ago.”
Ryan’s jaw dropped. “How did you find out?”
“After looking at the pictures of us.” Beth took a deep breath and smiled. “I asked my sister and she was honest with me.”
“But you personally don’t remember that? I mean us?”
“No, Ryan. I’m sorry.”
“So why are you? I mean, why are you here with me if you don’t remember?”
“Ryan, just because I don’t remember doesn’t mean that what happened before couldn’t happen again.” Beth chuckled. “My sister said you are my soulmate and apparently I am yours.”
Ryan couldn’t stop the tears that were forming in her eyes. “You mean you really feel something for me? Hanna said you did, but I didn’t believe it.”
“Hanna, huh?”
“Yes. She sat me down knowing there was something bothering me and told me to go after the girl,” Ryan said with a grin. “Why didn’t you say anything to me?”
“Because you were dating Lori.”
“I would have dropped her in heartbeat if I knew you were interested,” Ryan said reaching for Beth’s hand.
“I know and that’s why I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to do that to her.”
“You are too sweet, Beth.”
“So, will you tell me about us?” Beth asked putting her hand on top of the hand that Ryan held.
Ryan nodded as the waiter brought their entrees. “I was in love with you for longer than I recognized what that actually meant. Then one day you asked me to meet you in the park.” Beth’s eyes opened wide. “What is it?”
“The first time I saw you sitting in the park, I got a flash of something. I’m sorry, please go on.”
“Anyway, you led me toward the trees and I could tell you were nervous about something.” Ryan smiled. “So I said, just tell me Beth. I didn’t know what you were going to say, but I couldn’t stand your nervous silence.” She began to laugh. “You refused to tell me at first saying that I wouldn’t want to be your friend if you told me. I assured you that there was nothing you could tell me that would change how I felt about you.”
“Did I tell you that I was in love with you?” Beth asked quietly.
Ryan nodded. “You did and I told you I loved you too. Then you got pissed because you asked why I never said anything.”
The two women giggled. “I guess we have changed that much?” Beth asked still laughing.
“I guess we’re both still afraid,” Ryan said quietly.
“Can we make a promise to each other to be honest from this day forward?” Beth asked taking Ryan’s hand.
“I promise.” Ryan reached for the chain around her neck. “Do you want to read the inscription now?”
Beth smiled. “Forever yours, Love Beth.”
Ryan’s mouth dropped open again. “How did you know?”
“Rachel told me. She saw it the night she put you to bed after you got drunk.”
“So you have known about us for a good while now?”
“Yes, but that didn’t mean I knew what to do with that information. I was still trying to process what I had learned.” Beth admitted staring into the green eyes sitting next to her.
Ryan’s eyebrows raised. “Are you in love with me now?”
“Yes, Ryan Allen. I am very much in love with you.”
Ryan squeezed Beth to her body. “I love you too, Beth. I never stopped loving you.”
“Well, I’m glad that’s finally settled,” Beth said with a grin.
“Where do we go from here?” Ryan asked holding her breath.
“I think I would like to try their dessert.” Beth chuckled. “I think you know where this is going, but not right away.” She played with the tablecloth before she looked at Ryan. “We may have been lovers at one time, but I don’t remember any of that.”
“I won’t rush you, Beth. I’ll let you control how our relationship progresses. I won’t force you to do anything you are uncomfortable in doing. I’m just so happy to have you back in my life.”
Beth moved closer to Ryan. “I think kissing is a nice place to start.” Her lips brushed gently over Ryan’s before she pulled away.
Ryan’s eyes were still closed feeling the loss of Beth’s lips instantly. “You’re still a tease,” she said with a laugh.
“I’m not a tease. I just wanted to see what that felt like.”
“Well, what did you think?”
“I think I want to do that again, but not until we’re someplace private.”
“Waiter.” Ryan held up her hand. “Check, please.”
Beth began to giggle. “What about my dessert?”
“I think I have some ice cream at home.” Ryan gave the waiter her credit card.
Ryan held Beth’s hand impatiently waiting for the valet to return with their car.
Beth leaned over to Ryan’s ear. “Settle down, honey. I’m not going anywhere.”
Ryan handed the valet a five dollar bill as she opened Beth’s door. The ride back to the apartment was quiet as both women were lost in their own thoughts.<
br />
They reached Ryan’s apartment and opened the door. Ryan reached for Beth’s jacket and took it off. She now dropped her own blazer across a chair and led Beth over to the couch.
“You look like you’re going to climb out of your skin.” Beth chuckled.
“I am.” Ryan admitted freely.
Beth put her hand on Ryan’s cheek as her eyes stared at the full lips. Her lips were placed gently onto Ryan’s mouth. Ryan couldn’t hold back any longer as she pulled Beth to her. Ryan deepened the kiss and used her tongue to open Beth’s mouth. Their tongues danced across each other as Ryan moaned at finally having Beth back in her arms. Over and over they kissed. Beth needing to breathe pulled back.
“Wow,” Beth said softly.
“Is that a good wow or wow that’s not for me?” Ryan asked as her fingers moved over Beth’s cheek.
“That was a very good wow.” Her smile radiated. “Where have you been the last eight years?”
“Trying to forget you.”
“I’m glad you didn’t,” Beth said coming back to Ryan’s lips.
Ryan pulled Beth down on top of her as her hand went to the slit in her dress. She looked at Beth to see if there were stop signs. Finding none, she kissed her deeply as her hand caressed the bare skin on her thigh. “I love you so much, Beth.” Her hand gently moved over Beth’s skin.
Beth lifted her head to look into Ryan’s eyes. “I love you too, sweetheart.”
Just hearing the endearment leave Beth’s mouth brought her lips back to her. “I could kiss you all night.” Ryan lifted Beth back into a sitting position. “As much as I want to continue, I think we should stop.” Ryan knew if they continued she wouldn’t be able to hold back.
Beth came back for one more kiss and stood up. “Would you walk me home?”
“Of course.” Ryan held out Beth’s jacket then put her own on. She held her arm out for Beth.
At Beth’s door, Ryan asked. “May I see you again?” Sounding very formal.
“Tomorrow?” Beth asked raising her eyebrow.
“Call me in the morning,” Ryan said before she lightly kissed Beth good night.
“Good night, Ryan.”
“Good night.” Ryan practically skipped back down the hallway.
For the first time in years, Ryan slept soundly.
