Secrets on Cedar Key

by Terri DuLong

  I blew air through my lips as I continued to watch the dragonflies. This young woman seemed to have an exceptional understanding of reality. Not only did she seem to understand, but she didn’t seem to place blame on her mother for any shortcomings.

  “Fiona,” I said. “I wanted to discuss something with you. About your return to Boston.”

  Her head shot up as she stared at me. “Have I overstayed my welcome?”

  I heard the concern in her words. “No, no. Not at all. It’s just that . . . well . . . you’ve been here two weeks. I’ve enjoyed having you. Very much. But . . . we need to figure out what, exactly, you’re going to do. It’s probably time to be seen by the doctor again, plans have to be put in place for the delivery, and frankly, I don’t like the thought of you returning home and only having your roommate to depend on.”

  She remained silent, her eyes not leaving my face.

  “And so . . . I was wondering . . . if maybe you’d like to stay here. Permanently. Have the baby and maybe even attend the university in Gainesville to complete your degree. You’d be able to have a lot of support here—people to help you—but this would have to be your decision, and of course, we’d have to agree on certain things.”

  I looked up to see tears in her eyes. Tears that she wasn’t even bothering to brush away.

  “Do you mean that? Do you really mean you’d be willing to let me stay here? With you?” The tears were now falling down her face, and she swiped them with her hand. “When I first met you at the airport, I knew I liked you. A lot. I immediately knew why my father chose to stay with you. Why he didn’t break up his family for my mother and me. And since I’ve been here, I felt like I did belong, and that was because of you. But I didn’t . . . allow myself to think it was possible that I could stay.”

  I was humbled by what this girl had just said to me.

  She swiped at her tears again. “I would love to stay here. I’ve always wanted a family, and you’ve made me feel like I was part of yours.”

  I nodded and felt a lump in my throat. “Okay,” I said. “Okay. Well, there’s a few things we need to discuss. Things that we both have to agree on to make this work.”

  Fiona stared at me, an expectant look on her face.

  “I know it’s none of my business, but . . . I do think you should at least let the father know that you’re pregnant and where you’re at. Beyond that, it’s up to you what you choose to do concerning him. But I feel he has a right to know. You’ll have to get established with an obstetrician in Gainesville, and you’ll have to get your transcript transferred to UF and put in an application to hopefully begin classes in the fall.”

  “That’s all?” she said as she jumped up to pull me into a tight embrace.

  I laughed and said, “Yes, that’s all.” I felt her arms around me and her cheek next to mine, and for the first time in my life I had a feeling what it must be like to have a daughter.

  47

  By mid-February, life seemed to be on a more even keel. Fiona had moved in with me, we had visited an obstetrician in Gainesville whom she liked, she had already had her transcript transferred to the university and applied for the fall semester, and I wasn’t sure if the happiness she radiated was due to pregnancy or to the fact that she truly did feel part of a family.

  “Hey,” Berkley said. “I love those new hand-painted canvases you got in yesterday. I’m thinking of doing one of the cat ones. You have one that’s an amazing likeness to my Sigmund, but then of course Brit will feel left out.”

  I looked up from the silk threads I’d been placing in the correct drawers and laughed. “Oh, I could order you one that would resemble Brit. Dogs are pretty popular with needlepoint.”

  “That would be great, but I’ll definitely purchase that cat one today. So how’s everything going?”

  I was almost scared to say it. “Actually, very well. Fiona is due into Gainesville at twelve-thirty, and Worth has gone to pick her up for me at the airport.”

  “Oh, that’s right. She flew up to Boston last week to get things settled up there and talk to the father, huh? How’d that go?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, her doctor said she can’t fly after seven months, so she decided to go now, and I think it went pretty well. I’ll get more details when she gets back, but she did call Greg, they’ve been together discussing everything, and from the sounds of it, he was pretty excited about the baby.”

  “Oh, that’s great. I’m happy for her. She seems like such a nice kid.”

  I smiled. “Not so much a kid anymore. She turns twenty in April and will be having her own child the next month.”

  Berkley nodded. “True. When’s her due date?”

  “May ninth, but the doctor said she could be early. The baby’s a pretty good size.”

  “Well, at least she knows it’s not triplets like Monica. Do you know if it’s a boy or girl yet?”

  “She doesn’t want to know. Said it would be more fun to be surprised, so we’ve been knitting baby items in green, white, or yellow.”

  “You seem to be enjoying this, Marin. Your new role as impending grandmother.”

  “Oh, I’m not the grandmother.” Was I?

  “Of course you are. Fiona is your husband’s daughter. You might not be a blood relative, but . . . you’re still going to be a grandmother.”

  I smiled. I certainly had not considered this, but I rather liked the idea.

  I removed the cat canvas from the clips where it had been hanging. “Is this the one you want?”

  “Yeah, that’s the one. Now I have to choose my threads,” she said, walking to the cabinet containing all the various cotton and silk threads.

  After I rang up her purchase and she left, I stood looking around the shop and felt a sense of contentment. Despite the delays and disappointments, the needlepoint shop had finally become a reality, and during the past month, I’d been doing quite well with business. I gave some thought to what Berkley had said about me becoming a grandmother and smiled. Although Fiona had not referred to me with this title, Berkley was right. If Andrew were still alive and had contact with his daughter, her child would be our grandchild.

  Later that evening I sat at the table over dinner listening to Worth and Fiona discussing various news events and felt grateful for the paths my life had taken over the past year. Not only had Worth come into my life sharing his love, but now I also had Fiona, and soon her baby would be joining us. I liked how Worth and Fiona got along. It was obvious that they liked each other, and I couldn’t help but wonder if possibly Fiona looked up to him as one might a father figure.

  “Okay,” I heard her say. “Enough chitchat. I’m sure you both want to know what happened with Greg.”

  Worth had told me after they arrived back from the airport that Fiona wanted to wait till we were all together for dinner before she shared any information.

  “From what you’ve told me so far, it seems like it went pretty well?”

  “I think it did.” She fingered the linen napkin beside her dish. “He said he loves me and didn’t want me to break up with him, but . . . he felt if I didn’t love him in return, our relationship had no hope.” She looked up at both of us across the table. “I do love Greg. Very much. He’s quite excited about the baby,” she said, and I saw a smile cross her face. “And you were right, Marin. Telling him was the right thing to do.” She let out a sigh. “But we both agree we have to be practical. In other words, it would be foolish to rush into getting married right now. I need to complete my education, and that will take three years. Greg also wants to work on his doctorate. So . . . we’ve decided to make a commitment to each other; Greg will be a part of our child’s life and will be involved. He plans to fly down here in a few weeks. He’d like to meet you both. He also wants to be here as soon as the baby is born and . . . he’s in the process of applying for a teaching position at UF.”

  Life was most definitely on a more even keel. “Oh, Fiona, that’s wonderful. It sounds like you both made so
me very wise decisions. In the years to come, I don’t think either one of you will be sorry for completing your education. And of course, we look forward to meeting Greg.”

  Worth nodded. “He sounds like an intelligent man. And I give my approval,” he said, which caused Fiona to giggle.

  I got up to lean over and give her a hug. “I want you to know that I support you one hundred percent, and . . . your father would also approve of your plans.”

  The following Thursday evening, the knitting group was gathered at Yarning Together.

  “So can you believe it?” Raylene said. “There really is going to be a movie filmed here on the island. I knew that Carl and I were right.”

  Corabeth shook her head and laughed. “Yes, Raylene, but technically it’s not a movie. It’s a documentary about sea life in Cedar Key. I tend to doubt that you’ll be getting a part, so I’d say your actress days are over before they begin.”

  Laughter erupted in the shop as Raylene tossed her head and sniffed. “Oh, don’t be too sure of that. I might be able to convince them that they need a local with lots of information.”

  “Right. But I wouldn’t be running out to purchase a gown for the Academy Awards,” Flora said, causing all of us to laugh again.

  “It’s the university that’s doing the documentary, isn’t it?” my mother questioned.

  Chloe nodded. “Yeah. I believe it’s the journalism department in conjunction with the science department.”

  “Well, it’s still a good thing,” Sydney said. “It’ll be informational and promote some interest in the island.”

  I looked around at the women, all knitting away on the Compassion Shawl, and smiled. My gaze fell on Fiona, and I felt my smile broaden. This shawl seemed even more significant now. My mother had been right. Because I had allowed myself to forgive Andrew and in doing so had accepted Fiona, my life had taken off in a whole new direction, and I realized that compassion had been a vital part of making that happen.

  “Hey, everybody,” I said, standing up. “Time for our pastry break. I brought the dessert tonight, and it’s Friendship Bread.”

  “Oh, I love that,” Berkley said. “There’s so many variations of it, and I like the fact you can create it to be whatever you want.”

  My mother helped to slice it as I filled coffee cups.

  “This is delicious,” Corabeth announced. “Now, what on earth is that special taste?”

  I laughed. “It’s key lime. I added the juice of key limes to the batter, and it does give it a unique flavor.”

  “Oh, it certainly does,” Monica agreed. “I love it.”

  After we were seated with everyone enjoying the bread and coffee, Monica said, “Fiona, I meant to tell you, I’m not sure what you have for the baby, but I have three of everything. I’d love for you to use anything you might need. I have cradles, cribs, swings, car seats—you name it, I have it.”

  Fiona laughed. “You sound like a baby store. Thank you. I might take you up on your offer for a few items.”

  “Which reminds me,” I said. “I was hoping the two of us could go shopping next month after your doctor appointment. I wanted to buy some things for the baby.”

  Fiona’s face lit up. “Oh, that would be great. Since you’re going to be the grandmother, I have a feeling this child might be a little bit spoiled.”

  I felt my heart turn over. Had she really said that? That I would be the grandmother? “Really? You’re going to consider me the baby’s grandmother?”

  The look on her face told me there was no doubt whatsoever. “Well, of course you are. Gosh, I thought you knew that. Unless . . . you’d rather not be.”

  “Are you crazy?” I burst out laughing. “I’m thrilled. I couldn’t be any happier,” I said and heard clapping fill the room.

  “Congratulations,” Chloe said. “You beat me. I’m still waiting.”

  “Your life will never be the same. Becoming a grandmother brings so much pleasure and joy,” Sydney told us.

  “So what would you like to be called?” Fiona asked. “Because, of course, Dora will be the great-grandmother, and she’s called Gran.”

  I looked over to see a huge smile covering my mother’s face.

  “You can call me Nana,” I said and heard more clapping and laughter fill the room.

  48

  It was one of those wonderful spring days in March, when parts of the north were still getting snow dumped on them but Florida was enjoying sunshine, mild temperatures, and blooming trees and flowers. I walked into Toys R Us with Fiona beside me. We’d just come from her doctor appointment, and everything was on schedule. She was now looking very pregnant. The bump that I’d first noticed at Gainesville Airport had grown to a mound. She was in good health, had gained a proper amount of weight, and seemed to be quite happy being pregnant.

  “Okay,” I said. “Now the fun begins. Baby shopping has got to be one of the most fun things to do.”

  Fiona laughed as her gaze strayed to an adorable teddy bear mobile for the crib.

  “Do you have any particular theme in mind for the baby?” I asked.

  “Animals. Dogs, cats, bunnies. That sort of thing.”

  “Then I think this mobile would be perfect.” I wound up the music box attached to it and heard the strains of Brahms’s Lullaby.

  “I love it,” Fiona said as I placed it in my cart.

  “Now, I know you’re borrowing the cradle, swing, and car seat, but I want to buy the crib and carriage,” I said, leading the way.

  “Oh, Marin, no. You don’t have to do that.”

  “I know I don’t,” I said, giving her arm a squeeze. “I want to. Hey, it’s a grandmother’s prerogative, right?”

  She laughed and nodded. “It certainly is.”

  I couldn’t remember the last time I’d enjoyed shopping so much. Fiona and I simply had a good time—together. We wandered the aisles, looking at various items, seriously considering some and laughing at others. We debated over different brands, trying to decide which would be the safest for the baby. I’d hold up a stuffed animal, waiting for Fiona’s reaction, and smile as she cocked her head from side to side and then give an emphatic nod or shake of her head. By the time the cart was overflowing, I knew one thing for certain. My joy hadn’t come only from shopping for baby items—the joy that I felt was because for the first time in my life, I knew what it was like to have a daughter. No, she wasn’t a daughter that I had birthed, but that didn’t matter. The older I got, the more I realized that family didn’t have to be about birth. It could be something that we created, on our own—because of love.

  Four hours later we were back on Cedar Key after a very successful shopping spree. In addition to the crib and carriage, I had purchased infant nightgowns, receiving blankets, tee shirts, little stretch outfits, bottles—Fiona had made the choice to bottle-feed—and assorted other items. The trunk and backseat were loaded.

  “Do you mind if we stop at my mother’s house first? I know she’s anxious to hear about the doctor appointment and our shopping.”

  “Definitely. Besides, I have to pee again.”

  I laughed and headed to Andrews Circle.

  My mother and Oliver greeted us as we walked in.

  “Bathroom,” Fiona explained, rushing past.

  My mother laughed. “I take it everything went well?”

  “It did,” I said, following her to the kitchen.

  “How about some cranberry bread with coffee?”

  “Sounds good, but herbal tea for Fiona.”

  “I really love coffee,” we heard her say as she walked into the kitchen. “So I’ll be glad to go back to it after the baby.”

  “And the doctor is pleased with your progress?” my mother asked as she turned on the kettle.

  Fiona nodded. “Yes, everything is going well, but I’m afraid your daughter went a little crazy shopping. You should see everything she bought today. The car is filled to capacity.”

  My mother laughed. “And I’m sure she
had a great time doing it.”

  “I did. My goodness, we haven’t had a baby in this family in twenty-two years, since John was born.”

  My mother put a plate of sliced cranberry bread on the table. “Have you thought of any names yet?”

  Fiona reached for a slice. “I’ve thought of a few but nothing definite.”

  For some reason she’d been avoiding discussing names.

  “Was the shop busy today?” I asked.

  My mother shook her head. “Nothing that Chloe and I couldn’t handle. You had a few needlepoint sales, and Chloe took care of them. Raylene dropped by, and she’s convinced the film crew for the documentary is going to ask her to be interviewed.”

  I got up to get the kettle and laughed. “She just won’t give it up, will she? I think she missed her calling as a Hollywood actress.”

  I placed the mug of tea in front of Fiona.

  “Thanks. Well, you do have to admire her determination.”

  “True,” my mother said. “Is Worth at the house?”

  “He is. Told us he’s preparing spaghetti and meatballs for our dinner.”

  Fiona smiled. “I told Marin that man is definitely a keeper.”

  Seems I’d heard those words before. “I agree with that,” I said.

  After the dinner cleanup, Fiona said she was going to relax in her room. It had been a long day for her with the doctor, shopping, and travel to and from Gainesville.

  I kissed her cheek before she headed into her bedroom. “Remember, if you need anything, even during the night, get me.”

  She nodded and smiled. “Will do.”

  “How about a glass of wine outside?” Worth said.

  “Sounds great.” I headed to the patio, waiting for him to join me. We had mutually agreed the month before that Worth would give up his cottage at the Faraway to move in with me during the week. It had actually been Fiona who encouraged this. She insisted that if she weren’t with me, it probably would have already happened. She was right. And it was working out very well. I smiled as Suzette came over and curled up at my feet. Even Worth’s dog had fit right in, getting along very well with Toulouse. And Toulouse, being the laid-back kitten he was, got along as well with Suzette as he did with Oliver. On Saturday afternoons, Worth and I headed to Ocala to spend some alone time at his home, and I think Fiona also liked having some time to herself while we were away.