Reluctantly Royal

by Gillian Archer

  “Monsieur!”

  “Prince Lucien, wait!”

  They could catch up. I had to get to my woman now. I tore into the departures terminal like a madman. Fortunately for me, everyone inside the terminal was more interested in their baggage and flights than the harried prince frantically searching for the Air France desk. Spying it about twenty meters away, with Hannah handing over her credit card, I leaped into action. I ran across the terminal and arrived panting at the desk just as the agent handed Hannah her tickets.

  “Here you are. You’re leaving from terminal two. You need to—”

  I plucked the tickets from the employee’s hand. “She doesn’t need these.”

  Hannah gasped. “Luc—”

  “Monsieur, I will call security if you don’t—” The ticket agent gaped as she apparently realized my identity. “Votre Altesse. Je suis désolé.”

  I waved away her apologies. “Ms. Allen will not be needing these. Please refund the money onto her card. Is there somewhere private where she and I could talk?”

  The attendant waved to the closed door behind her.

  “Perfect. Merci.” I grabbed Hannah’s hand and pulled her behind the counter and through the door and into the tiny office beyond. I closed the door behind me with a bang and turned to Hannah’s pale, slumped figure. “What the hell is going on?”

  Hannah looked at me with wide eyes welling with tears. “I was going to tell you. I swear I was, but when I got off the phone, I just lost it, and Aristide was there being so understanding. I just…I don’t…I’m so sorry.”

  “Mon chou.” I pulled her into my arms and held her tight. “It’s going to all right. Whatever is going on, it’ll be all right.”

  “You can’t say that,” she wailed.

  “Oui, I can. Whatever is going on will be all right because I’m here with you. We’ll get through this together.”

  “You can’t say that. You don’t know.”

  “I can. Together—”

  “I have cancer.”

  Hannah’s tear-filled voice was like a sledgehammer, shattering the image I had of our life together. Everything I thought we were building toward was gone in a blink of an eye.

  My heart stopped and I swayed for a second, light-headed. “What? How? I thought…” I couldn’t form a coherent thought, let alone a sentence. “Cancer?”

  “Yes.” Hannah pulled herself out of my arms and paced across the tiny office to the miniblind-covered window. “That phone call I got earlier was from my doctor. I’d found a lump on my neck. My thyroid. There was a mix-up in the lab and it took them longer than usual to run the tests. This here”—she pointed to the Band-Aid that she still wore on her neck—“wasn’t from a curling iron. I had a biopsy done that Monday, when I left you a note. The results just came back.”

  “I don’t understand.” My lips felt numb. “You said everything was okay. You just burned your neck with a curling iron. None of this makes sense.”

  “I LIED.” Hannah screamed as tears coursed down her cheeks. “I didn’t want it to be true. We just met. I didn’t know how to unload all that on you. And the longer I avoided it, the less it felt real. I thought, I hoped, that everything would be okay. But it’s not.” Hannah bent over and held her stomach. “It’s not.”

  I crossed the office and pulled Hannah back into my arms, but she fought me the whole way. “It’s going to be okay, mon chou. We’ll get through this together. I promise.”

  Hannah pushed me away. “You can’t say that! You don’t know. It’s not easy. It’s not pretty. It’s scary. I’m afraid that I’m going to die. I’m so scared. I’m so scared, Luc.”

  My heart plummeted and I pulled a now limp Hannah into my arms. She fell against my chest as sobs wracked her body. I held her in my arms and rocked her slightly as I ran a hand up and down her back, trying to calm her as I would a child.

  “It’s too early to think like that. You have to see a doctor and have tests and make a plan. You are light-years from losing hope. You have to fight.”

  Hannah made a sound halfway between a sob and a laugh. “I wish it were that easy. I’m so mixed up. I don’t know what to do.”

  “Let’s take it one step at a time. Do you want to stay here? I can have the best specialists flown here in a matter of hours. Or do you want to go home? Be with your family and your doctor there?”

  “Home. I want to go home.”

  “Then that’s what we’ll do.”

  “Can we stay at my apartment? I want to sleep in the bed my dad made me.”

  “Done.”

  The next few minutes were filled with bureaucratic agony as my people got the plane ready. All I could do was hold an exhausted Hannah and pray.

  When we finally got in the air, it was an excruciating flight. Unlike the one to Monaco that’d been so full of hope and laughter and lovemaking, this flight only had tears and anguish.

  “I’ve spent my entire junior and senior years in high school being ‘the hospital girl,’ and now it’s happening all over again. Did I ever tell you about the aftermath of my accident?” Hannah gave an ugly laugh as she looked out the dark window. “I spent so much time in the hospital—first in the intensive care unit and then in the pediatric ward because I was under eighteen. It was a special hell of numbness and pain and doctors and nurses and little kids crying. It was not how I wanted to spend my junior year in high school. And my dad is just a plumber—my mom works as an aide in an elementary school—so we didn’t have the best insurance. Medical expenses almost bankrupted my parents. And here we are again. Only worse because now it’s…” Hannah trailed off like she couldn’t say the word.

  “Mon chou.” I reached a hand toward her but she pulled away.

  “I can’t do this. If I let you touch me, I’m going to fall apart. And I can’t do that. I need to keep it together.”

  “There is nothing wrong with falling apart. That is what I’m here for, Hannah. I’ll be your shoulder, your support, whatever you need. I am here for you.”

  Hannah’s eyes welled with tears as she shook her head. “I, uh, I’m sorry. I’m going to go lie down for a bit. I’m tired.”

  I sighed in frustration but let it go. “Okay. Get some sleep. I’ll be right here if you need me.”

  The rest of the flight passed by in a blur. I texted my brother to update him on our situation and had my assistant, Morgan, cancel all my upcoming appointments. Hannah was my only priority. I tried to comfort her as best I could, but it felt like the closer we got to Las Vegas, the more distance she put between us. By the time our plane was on its final approach, Hannah was asleep on the seat next to me, exhausted from the tears and stress.

  She only murmured softly when I picked her up and carried her off the plane. I wish the rest of the night could’ve gone as smoothly, but I had to wake her up so we could get through Customs and Immigration.

  Ten minutes later I bundled a cranky Hannah into the back of our SUV, where she promptly fell asleep on my shoulder. And later, when I carried her into her apartment and placed her, still sleeping, on the bed her father had made for her the last time she’d gone through this, all I could think was that we’d get through this. As long as we stayed together and held each other, we’d get through this. We had to. I’d already lost my twin; I couldn’t contemplate a future that didn’t have Hannah in it.

  Chapter 22

  The next morning Hannah was on the phone and scheduling an appointment with her doctor. I sat on a stool at her tiny kitchen counter literally twiddling my thumbs, an empty bowl of cereal in front of me. I wanted to do something to help—anything—but what? Nicolas and Dimitri were cooling their heels in the parking lot of Hannah’s apartment. The rest of my staff was again ensconced at the Commonwealth Hotel & Casino. So far our return to the U.S. had gone unobserved, but we could only fly under the radar for so long. Eventually a neighbor or someone in a doctor’s waiting room would sell us out to the tabloids. I had to come up with a plan.

  �
�Okay, I have to be at Dr. Ledbetter’s office in an hour. Crap, I hope my car’s okay. I haven’t used it in weeks.” Hannah seemed to be muttering to herself as she paced around the apartment poking at her phone screen.

  “Why would you drive yourself? We’ll take the SUV with Dimitri.”

  Hannah looked up at me with a frown. “I don’t want you there. I’m going by myself.”

  “Hannah, that’s ridiculous. The doctor is going to say a bunch of medical mumbo jumbo, half of which you won’t be able to absorb. You need someone there with you. If not me, then your parents. You can’t do this by yourself. You don’t have to. Let us help you through this.”

  “I don’t want you there, Luc. I don’t want you here for any of this. You were just supposed to be a weekend fling. How did we get here? This is ridiculous.”

  “Hannah, you don’t mean that.”

  “No, I do. This isn’t going to be fun, Luc. Endless doctor appointments, hospital visits, my hair falling out. I don’t want you here watching it all. You are the living embodiment of the life I wish I could have—that I now know I’ll never have. It was fun, but I think we can both agree this has run its course.”

  “I agree to nothing. I’m here. I’m staying here, and short of calling the police you can’t make me leave. I am here for you. I will be here for you always. You can say whatever ugly thing you want to throw at me, but I know it’s just your fear talking. I’m here and I’m staying.”

  Hannah shook her head with a mutinous expression on her face.

  I shrugged. “Fine. If you won’t let me ride with you to the doctor appointment, at least take the car and Dimitri. You shouldn’t be driving with everything that’s going on.”

  “Fine. But he’s staying in the parking lot. It’s a doctor’s office. I don’t need a bodyguard.”

  “Agreed.”

  We sounded more like bargaining politicians than lovers, but if this was the most Hannah was willing to give me right now, I’d take it.

  I watched as she gathered her things, then paused at the door. She turned and looked at me over her shoulder. Her eyes welled with tears and she swiped at them in frustration. “I just…This is hard. I know you want to help, but I need to do this my way.”

  I crossed the room to hug her. Holding her tight in my arms, I wished for the millionth time that this wasn’t happening. That this beautiful woman wasn’t so scared. That I could wave my hand and make the cancer disappear. I cupped her face in my hands and kissed her forehead. “You are going to be fine. We will get through this together.”

  Hannah smiled tremulously at me. “I hope so.”

  It killed me to watch her walk out the door, but I did. Then I got on my phone and made some calls.

  —

  To say she was surprised when she found me sitting in her doctor’s waiting room would be an understatement. It was her gasp that first drew my attention away from my mobile. I had a second to wonder if I’d been recognized, but the lack of tension in Nicolas’s body language where he sat next to me clued me in. My head came up and I met Hannah’s shocked eyes.

  Aside from her surprised expression, Hannah looked…worn, like she was hanging on by a thread. She had lines bracketing her mouth, and her eyes were shining and red like she’d spent the hour we’d been apart crying. Her surprise turned to determination as she looked away and marched to the receptionist’s window like she didn’t know me.

  Fuck that.

  After a quiet conversation with the receptionist, Hannah took a clipboard and sat in a chair as far away from me as possible.

  Like that would stop me.

  Without a word to Nicolas, I walked across the room and took a seat next to Hannah. She didn’t look up or acknowledge my presence. I huffed an irritated breath and folded my hands across my stomach. If she wanted to play games, that was fine by me. I had all the time in the world.

  As I sat there, again literally twiddling my thumbs, it occurred to me that Hannah was here all by herself. No parents. No siblings. No friends. Considering how she had such a huge network of people who cared about her, where the hell were they? Had she not told anyone about what she was going through? Why would she do that?

  I let out another irritated sigh as Hannah’s pen audibly scratched across the paper. She still didn’t look at me. Settling in, I leaned back into the chair and looked around the waiting room. The décor was what I’d expect at a regular clinic in the middle of the Vegas Valley—beige and soulless. Clinical and depressing. A middle-aged woman across the way talked quietly to the man who sat beside her. Nicolas still sat in the same spot I’d vacated a few minutes ago, his eyes constantly roving the occupants in the room while studiously avoiding being too obvious. Three seats over from Hannah, a woman in her twenties sniffled into a tissue as she worked on her paperwork. Aside from those people, the other fifteen or so chairs were empty, which wasn’t surprising given that it was barely nine o’clock.

  When I couldn’t take it anymore, I huffed out an annoyed breath. “Are you seriously not going to acknowledge my presence?”

  “I’m sorry, do I know you, sir?” Hannah tried for an innocent expression, but she couldn’t make the ire in her eyes disappear.

  “I’d be happy to remind you exactly how well we know each other since you clearly need a refresher.” I leaned toward her but froze when she tossed up a hand.

  “Do. Not. Touch. Me. Luc.”

  I sat back in my chair with a satisfied smile. “Funny. You don’t know me, yet you use my name. Weird, that.”

  “Oh, my god, you’re impossible.”

  “Yeah, I’ve heard that. Tenacious. Stubborn. Asshole. Take your pick.”

  Hannah shook her head in frustration and turned back to her paperwork. “I told you that I wanted to do this by myself. I assume you’re the reason that Dimitri took that long detour on the drive here?”

  “Yes. Unlike some people, Dimitri listens to me.”

  “I said I wanted to do this on my own.”

  “And yet here I sit. Strange, no? Almost like I get a voice in this relationship, too.”

  “I don’t want you here. Just go back to your fancy suite and your bodyguards and your drama. I’m fine. Or I will be fine. Whatever. Just go.”

  I nodded slowly as I watched Hannah bend over her paperwork once more. “So you’ll be fine here all by yourself?”

  “That’s what I said. Go. I’m fine.”

  “I couldn’t help but notice when you first got here that no one was with you. Where’s your overprotective parents? Your annoying brother? All those friends of yours we always bump into? For someone who has such a huge network of caring, devoted people in her life, it’s odd to see you here alone. Why are you here all by yourself?”

  “I didn’t want to worry them needlessly, okay? It took years to get them off my back, after my accident. My family is the definition of overprotective. I didn’t want to go through all that again—put them through all that again—if I didn’t need to. After this appointment and I have some answers, I’ll tell them.”

  “And you think they’ll be okay with that?”

  “They’ll have to be, because that’s the way it is.” Hannah stood up to return her paperwork.

  The woman a few seats down smiled tremulously at me, then ducked her head, embarrassed that she’d been caught eavesdropping. I didn’t care. It wasn’t like we’d exactly been quiet with our argument. And judging by the way the older woman across the way glared daggers at me, we definitely hadn’t been quiet.

  Not that I gave a shit.

  After a few words with the receptionist, Hannah returned to the seat beside me but didn’t say a word. I smiled to myself as I stretched an arm over the back of her chair. I might not have won the war—yet—but I’d certainly won the first battle.

  Hannah sank into the chair, resting her head against my arm on the chair back. She closed her eyes as she breathed deeply. I wanted to say something—tell her it would be okay, that I wouldn’t leave—but I was too af
raid of upsetting the tenuous balance we’d struck.

  It was a long, tense five-minute wait. I had a hard time exuding a calm demeanor. My knee wanted to bounce. I wanted to shift and find a more comfortable position in my hard-ass chair, but I had to be Hannah’s rock. She was nervous enough; I didn’t want to add to her anxiety.

  Finally a door opened and a woman in scrubs stood with a manila envelope. “Hannah?”

  Hannah bounced up with unnatural eagerness. She took a step toward the woman, and I stood. Hannah turned to me and put a hand up. “You are not going in there.”

  “But—”

  “No. It’s my appointment. I don’t want you in the room.”

  “Okay. I’ll wait out here.” I raised my palms and shrugged. “But if you change your mind, I’ll be right here. And just so you know, there will be no sneaking out a side door after your appointment. We will discuss everything after you see your doctor.”

  Hannah rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything as she joined the woman in scrubs. The door closed softly behind them and I returned to my seat next to Nicolas. I sighed as I settled in for a long wait.

  Minutes passed by slowly. I spent most of them fidgeting in my chair, fiddling with my phone, and angrily finger-combing my hair. I thought through everything I’d said to her. Should I have explained more about what my brother’s death did to me? Why it made me the person I am now? More than anything I wanted to be inside that room with her, not out here avoiding eye contact with people and hoping that the borrowed baseball cap kept me from being recognized.

  It felt like ages, but probably only five minutes later the same scrubs-clad woman stood in the doorway. “Luke? Is there a Luke waiting for Hannah?”

  I bounded to my feet and raced across the waiting room. “Is she okay? What’s wrong?”

  The woman smiled. “Nothing’s wrong. Hannah would like you to join her. I believe she’s a little anxious.”

  My shoulders slumped as the panic leached out of my body. Thank God. I gave a chin jerk to Nicolas, who returned it, before I followed the woman down the narrow hallway.

  Opening the last door, the woman stepped back and motioned me to enter. “She is waiting for you in here.”